Disillusioned

Chapter Thirty - Seeing Red... A lot Of It.

"Dean what is it?" I ask.

"I can't talk about it now can you come to my house tomorrow?" Dean asks.

"Of course anything for you man," I say.

Dean hangs up. I feel a giant rock in my stomach and I know it will be there until I speak to Dean tomorrow. I hope everything with him is all right. I see a black car pull up on my driveway. I can't recognize the car at all. Diana get's out of the car. I roll my eyes. I want to just run inside and close the door, but my inner good angel that I wish didn't exist is telling me to stay and talk to her. Diana starts walking towards me with a smile on her face. I feel like she is up to something.

"Hi Tyler" Diana says.

"Hello" I say.

"So I am free today what are we doing?" Diana asks.

Hold on a second did she miss the memo that we broke up and when you break up you have time apart from them.

"I am busy today," I say.

"Doing what?" Diana asks.

I am not quick enough to come up with an answer and I now look like an idiot. I guess I can go to lunch with Diana I mean what's the worse that could happen? I could try and scab free food off her anyways.

"Nothing at all" I say.

"Well you can come to lunch with me then" Diana says.

"Alright just this once" I say.

I open the front door and yell goodbye, no one heard me I was basically just talking to myself. I nod and follow Diana to her car. It's good she can drive me around for a change. I like not having to waste my own petrol it's a great feeling.

"Where are we headed for lunch?" I ask.

"Pyronix" Diana says.

"I thought Carolines parent's club was just a club," I say.

"They also do food during the day" Diana claims.

I shrug it off. We end up at Pyronix and in the outside area it's true they do serve food. As much as the company I am with isn't the best at least there is food involved. We sit down and start looking through the menu.

"So when are we getting back together?" Diana asks.

I start singing Taylor Swift in my head. We are never ever ever getting back together! I laugh to myself.

"We broke up Diana I don't want to be with you again," I say.

"It was just a bump in the road though" Diana says, "We can work it out"

The look in her eyes is desperate. I feel bad for her but at the same time I am glad that I decided to break up with her. I can't be with someone who is that controlling and expects me to do certain things. A relationship should be based on compromise. Maybe Diana wants to do that. I still just want to remain by myself and wait for the right girl to come along.

"We can't work it out Diana I am happy to be a friend in the future but there is nothing romantic between us anymore" I say.

Diana's face drops. She starts to cry. I feel bad for Diana I really do but I can't make my heart feel something that isn't there.

"Please don't cry Diana," I say.

"I can't help it" Diana sobs, "You have hurt me Tyler"

I have hurt her. It sinks in. I really have hurt Diana. I have put her through a lot. Maybe everything that has happened is my fault. No it's not. I can't keep blaming myself for everyone else's mistakes.