Hold Me Now

Prologue

Memories are like water. They can pour out in strong gushes like a waterfall, or like a huge ocean wave crashing on the shore. They can also evaporate into thin air. Then there are some memories that never fade away. Johnny's memories aren't as happy as some may think. 

There's the memory of his first scraped knee. That was the first time he learned the cruelty of his stepfather's words. He was five and had learned to ride his bike without the training wheels. He had hit a rock and fallen down hard. His knee ached and it was bloody. Running into the house, he called for his mom. Except he didn't get his mom, he got Sid instead. 

"Fell off your bike, did you? Can't even ride a bike." He shook his head in disgust as he pulled down ointment and a BandAID. "Here. Be sure not to get blood everywhere." When Sid walked off he cried harder.

Most of his memories involve his stepfather. And most of them are as unpleasant as he is. But there's one that sticks with him. One that resounds in his mind. He clings to it, treasures it.

It was his seventh-grade year. He was not feeling very cheerful. Some boys at school were teasing him, again, calling him a skinny geek. He didn't even want to think about the girls. They all laugh at him too. Inside he felt like crap, especially knowing he'd have to deal with cranky Sid at home. Thinking of his stepfather made him nauseous. 

That's why he took his sweet time getting home this particular day. But when he did reach home, his mom greeted him as usual. "Hi, Baby. How was school?" she asked. He didn't respond and she must have known it was terrible because she hugged him and gave him a bag of chips, along with a Coke. She only ever gave him soda if the day had been especially rough. 

When he sat on the barstool eating the chips, with his hand on his chin, she tried to encourage him. "Baby one day everything is going to turn out alright. You just have to hold on to hope love. Let your hopes, not your hurts shape your future. Things will work out Johnny. You'll see. One day you're going to have friends and you're going to meet a girl. And that girl will see your heart and she'll love you just because you're you."

She held him then and he cried on her shoulder. It's like that between the two of them. His mom encouraging him and he not being afraid to be weak with her. She sees his tears and his fears. She sees his good and his bad, and she loves him anyway, unconditionally. Will he ever find friends like that? Will he ever meet a girl who does that too, loves him without condition?

The thing about this memory is it's simple. It's not crowded by fluff or grit, but it's filled with promise. The events that followed make it stand out. It's those moments that make his memories priceless, valuable, and worthwhile. He started karate at Cobra Kai and made friends, real friends with Bobby, Tommy, Jimmy, and Dutch. They're like the brothers he never had. And they're fun, really fun. Plus they all live not too far from each other, which is wild. His friends all live in the Hills like him. They could have passed each other on the street and have never known it.

He hung out a lot at Bobby and Jimmy's houses. They live closest to him, just a few streets over. Tommy and Dutch would always join them. It wasn't until the summer before freshman year that he finally rode his bike over to Tommy's. Tommy lives on Crispin Lane. It's five blocks from his own house. He's been too lazy to go there before. 

When he got to Crispin, he began looking at the house numbers on the yard signs. Number 1112 is his friend's number. When he passed 1110, he knew Tommy is next door. But it's when he got off his bike, that his whole world stopped. It's like time stood still just for him.

Girls have always been a mystery to him. He hasn't really cared for them. They've either ignored him or made fun of him. However, on this day his heart beat faster. So fast he thought he might be ill, something is wrong with him. But no, couldn't be it. It's probably just the exertion from the bike ride over. That's sure to be the thing.

Although when his blonde head turned back around, to look at the house across the street, his heart sped up again. Standing in the front yard walking to the mailbox is the most beautiful girl. Long brown hair, curled a little, heart-shaped face, petite and pretty. No, not pretty... hot. She's hot. A total babe like they say on that one TV show he watches. She has on these short denim cutoffs and a tank. They show off her tanned legs. No shoes on her feet. 

Just then his friend came outside. "Hey, Johnny. Glad you made it. How are you?" Tommy asked. He noticed him looking across the street. Turning his attention that way, he saw his neighbor.  Apparently, Johnny saw her too. So, he shouted loudly "Hi Ava!"

What is Tommy doing? He's going to kill him and his loud mouth. But wait... she's waving to them. Since he didn't know her personally, he didn't wave back. Instead, he stuck his hands in his pockets.

After he waved, Tommy explained "That's Ava Green. Her Dad's a big-time neurosurgeon. She's going to West Valley like us. She's a real sweetheart, Man. I don't like her in that way if that's what you're thinking. She's too much like a sister. Yuck!" He saw Johnny still hadn't moved his eyes off of the house across the street. 

Trying to get his attention back on guy stuff, he told him "So Johnny I have this new foosball table in the basement. Come on, let's go play." He tapped his friend on the shoulder and he finally moved.

Johnny made a mental note to visit Tommy more often. Despite visiting Tommy a lot more, it wasn't until September, of freshman year, when he actually talked to Ava. Ava Green, the prettiest girl in the whole ninth grade. No! The whole school. For someone who likes karate and making risky moves, his courage falters when he's around her. 

It's taken him months to just say "Hi". He was standing at his locker when she was at hers. It was now or never. Taking a deep breath, he shut his door closed, and walked over to her. She was putting a book in. Moving to lean on the locker beside hers, with a nervous voice he said "Hi Ava". 

She looked up from her books, and over to the voice. It's Johnny, Tommy's friend. Her heart sped up. "Hi, Johnny. How are you?" 

How is he? Besides his sweaty palms and out-of-control runaway heart, he's fine. "I'm good. Really good."

Picking at a nonexistent piece of lint, she babbled out "Same." 

After that, he started talking to her on a daily basis. Then he finally asked her out. They went to Golf 'N Stuff on their first date, where she beat him at Skee Ball and Putt-Putt. "How did you hit four holes in one?" 

Pointing her putter at him, she admitted "I play golf with my dad all the time. Putt-putt is child's play. I want to try out for the school golf team in the spring. What about you? What do you do?"

He told her about karate and they both talked about their families. They talked about everything and anything, just making memories together. He fell for her quickly but it came so naturally. It's the only thing his heart knows. 

From September to April they did everything together. She would watch him at karate. He would drive the golf cart for her. He would hold her books. She would hold his hand. He would talk with her friends Kara, Joy, Rachel, and Charley (Charlene). She would sit with his friends. Life was good. But then they broke up. 

Some memories sneak out of his eyes and roll down his cheeks. Breaking up with her was like a small death. The death of your heart while it's still alive. It's hard for him to breathe. This is a double whammy, worse than any roundhouse kick or punch to the face. The loss of his friend and his love all in one blow. He should be mad, but he isn't. He heard if you love someone you let them go. If they come back to you it's meant to be. The breakup came out of nowhere. They started with a simple hello and ended with a confusing, complicated goodbye. 

It's funny to him, to think that even now. Anytime he sees her, his heart still clinches. The irony is he finds himself in the same place. Broken up with another girl, before Senior year. Is he just a loser destined to lose at love? But every ending is just a new beginning waiting to happen. Some memories never leave your body. They're imprinted on you, for eternity. They're memories of a badass story that he never expected to end.