rock 'n love // alex turner

10th

When we got home, it was very late so we all went to sleep.
The next morning I got up early, I wasn't sleepy and then Madison and Caryl came in.
"Anne are you ok?" asked Caryl.
"Yeah all right" I replied, but she knew me too well.
"You've been distracted and absent since last night" she said. And she was right, I didn't know what I was afraid of and what is wrong with me
"Anne, you got a message," Madison said.
"I don't want to get up. Can you read it please?" I said.

Alex band guy:
"Anne, are you OK? You seemed weird last night."

"Anne, it's Alex, he wants to know how you're doing," Madison said.
Fuck! everybody noticed. Madison handed me the phone and I answered it.

"Hey, yeah everything's fine I was just a little tired."

"Anne I can't see you like this, I know what's bothering you and I know that's who you are but you need to start opening up with the people. You can't stay like this forever and Alex seems like a really nice guy and you're missing an opportunity" Madison said
"Mads I don't know what to do, I need to take a breath" I replied.
"Honey you don't have to feel obligated, just think about it. Do you think there might be something between him and you?" she asked

"I don't know. I just need to understand," I answered honestly.

I've always been like that, ever since I was little. I didn't like being around a lot of people, but I was afraid of loneliness, and I've had that feeling many times in the past.

Maybe I misunderstood, maybe Alex just wants to be a friend, but I can't know if I don't address it.
"Anne you know if you need help we're always there and you can tell us anything," Caryl told me.
"Exactly and if you need advice you can count on us" Madison said giving me a kiss on the forehead. Then we cooked our lunch and talked about something else.

Caryl was going to visit her parents so I took the opportunity to go to Canterbury too, but only for two days because I didn't want to leave Madison alone.

I took the train straight after lunch, my parents moved to Canterbury because they always found it interesting and it was only an hour and a half from London, so we would always be close by.

Fortunately it wasn't raining, so I could get home very peacefully. I missed spending time with my parents, even though I am very independent and love my life in London.
"Honey, tomorrow morning you will be alone until 1pm because we are both at work, if you want you can go for a walk there are so many nice markets" my mother told me after dinner.

"Okay, I'm going to bed now. I love you," I replied.
I set my alarm for the next morning and finally I slept all night.