The Pilot

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟓: 𝐂𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭

You had now been at Howl's castle for 3 weeks. You had begun to resume your usual physical training and your torso wound was almost completely healed. 

You now trusted the members of the castle more. Even howl. You helped Sofie clean up around the castle and had long conversations with Calcifer, well less conversation and more arguing.

Markle and Howl trained on the weekends and you enjoyed watching them.

Markle was getting better and better. He had perfected disguises by now. But Howl had been leaving more often so Markle could not show him.

You had a nagging feeling about what Howl was doing when he went out.

Transforming himself into kind of demon to watch the war. You had seen him sneak back a few times.

This night was no different except you waited for him. You wanted answers. 

At around 3 in the morning the door clicked and opened to reveal a bird like creature. It was Howl but the form still sent chills down your spine. He began to transform back to his human form as he moved.

Calcifer was burning so low from exhaustion Howl hadn't seen you yet. You sat cross armed in the chair in front of the fireplace. howl made his way up the entryway stairs and past you.

"You shouldn't be transforming so much. You'll be stuck in that form forever." You said sternly as you threw another log to Calcifer. 

Howl froze now completely back to normal. You didn't look at him but you knew he had turned towards you. After a few moments of silence you spoke up.

"The war won't stop anytime soon. Don't bother killing yourself over it." You said standing up and walking up past him to your room. 

Howl's POV:

I was exhausted. Another day spent seeing nothing but destruction and chaos.

I tried my best but yet another town was lost to Sulimann and the so called wizards who had moored into beasts.

Calcifer's light was low and I assumed everyone was asleep. I made my way towards the stairs leading to my bedroom when Y/n's voice stoped me.

"You shouldn't be transforming so much. You'll be stuck in that form forever." They said. I turned only to see them still staring at Calcifer's fire.

I was so shocked and tired I couldn't say anything.

They stood up and walked towards me.

"The war won't stop anytime soon. Don't bother killing yourself over it." 

Those words rung in my head.

Did they care for me? Or was Y/n only saying something to irk me?

I made my way up the stairs and to my bedroom. I grabbed a change of clothes and a howl before walking into the bathroom. Sofie had left me a note on the mirror.

If I see even a spot of blue potion stained on this bathtub I'll tie you down and dye your hair green. -Sofie

Yikes. She could be scary when she wanted. I ran the water until the bath was filled to the brim with hot soapy water.

The warm water felt good on my aching muscles. I lay there for several minutes before my thoughts brought me back to Y/n. 

God why did they have to be so beautiful/handsome. I thought of how they had opened up more in the past 3 weeks. They let their kind and funny side show.

I keep telling myself I'm only interested in Y/n because of their past and connection to Madame Sulimann but a part of me knew that was a lie.

Y/n is funny and smart and so so beautiful/handsome. They make me feel as though I have a heart.

My heart...I can't do that. I have no heart I know this. I can't properly love. 

I can't lead another person on especially not Y/n. Who am I kidding Y/n probably wouldn't even want me. 

I suffered through my own thoughts and fell into bed that night completely exhausted.

Y/n POV:

I heard the water in the bathroom run. Howl must be taking a bath.  I felt strangely about earlier like my intestines are tingling. Like I'm on fire. This can't be love can it?

No that's ridiculous. I don't love. I serve and I protect the King and Madame Sulimann. I could never throw my life away for love. Especially not love for Howl.

I lay in my bed thinking until almost 5 in the morning before finally falling asleep.

Normal POV:

The next day both Y/n and Howl where tired. Howl was a lot more distant towards everyone than he was yesterday or the day before. It was strange but you ignored it.

It wasn't like you cared about him...right?