Resurrection (Red vs Blue)

34: Arguments And Apologies

34: Arguments And Apologies

Present Day: Jungle Hideout (The planet Chorus)

Tucker stood at the edge of the cliff near the hideout. While the Reds had been bickering and keeping Caboose entertained, he'd decided it'd be the perfect time to slip away. He needed time to think. Everything had to gone to shit, and it had gone fast. He hadn't meant to screw up the mission. But they were getting hammered, and he didn't want to die. Or worse, see anyone else get killed. Not over a stupid flash drive. Then, to add to it, he got screamed at for trying to get everyone back alive.

Then there was the issue with the freelancers being around. They were good to have around for fights, but any other time, they made him feel completely insignificant. And Wash was starting to act like them again more and more every day he was around them. Tucker had thought Wash — and Carolina, for that matter — had gotten past acting like the rest of the assholes. As it turned out, apparently he was wrong. He got that being around old friends or colleagues changed people, but now was not the time to be going backwards like that. At least he didn't think so. Not when them sliding backwards meant turning into mindless killing machines.

And then there was Church. Nothing had been right with him since he'd came back. Church still looked like his best friend, and sounded like his best friend, but he sure as hell didn't act like it. Tucker knew Church had always been an asshole; it was part of what made him Church. But since he'd been running with the freelancers, he'd taken being an asshole to an entirely new level. It was like he'd lost his best friend all over again.

Footsteps from behind him broke Tucker's train of thought. "Well, Carolina's leg is all patched up. Again," Washington said. "Doctor Grey really hounded her about tearing her leg open again. Told her no more super speed under any circumstances until the wound is healed. Ya know, I gotta say, I don't think I've ever seen a civilian lecture a freelancer like that. Ever. It was actually a pretty entertaining sight."

Tucker took a deep breath and cleared his throat. "Hey, Wash," Tucker said as he turned to face him. "Do you, uh . . . Do you got a sec?"

"Tucker, I swear to God. If you want me to look at another rash, I'm going to punch you so hard you'll be unconscious until next week," Wash told him.

"No, Christ, it's nothing like that. It's just . . . It feels like what decision I make or what I say, I can't do anything right. Instead, things just keeps getting worse," Tucker said.

"Oh, holy shit. You're actually being serious right now," Wash realized.

"When we were back at the canyon, you told me to try and be better. And ever since then, that's all it seems like anyone ever tells me. Try this, try that. I could do better if I just put in the effort. Well, I'm fucking trying, and all that seems to happen is either people get killed, or I ruin the mission. How am I supposed to know if I'm making the right call? How do you know?" Tucker asked.

"Well, you never really do know. I know I don't. There's never really a right or wrong answer. It really just comes down to what you think is the best course of action. Regardless of what anyone else thinks," Wash answered.

"But what if what I think is best seems to suck the more I think about it?"

"Then you learn from it and try again. That's all you can do."