Todobaku Oneshot Book (Aka My Insanity)

The Secret is in the White Plastic Cup

Yo don't do drugs kids. This stuff I wrote is just entertainment. You should not do the same-

***

"Why are you so pretty, you fucker?" Bokugou slurs. His eyes glint in dim light and he raises a sluggish finger to Todoroki's reddening face.

The cogs in Todoroki's head lag behind his mouth.

"You think I'm pretty?" Todoroki mumbles.

"Well, I think your..."

Pretty too. Much prettier than me.

"I knew it!" Sero shouts. He springs up on a couch cushion with a wobbly grin, and noodle legs.

Kaminari holds him upright by the waist, but his eyes are on Todoroki. Sharp and glassy.

"We were waiting for this." Kaminari says.

They're screwed.

And almost everyone is wasted.

Ashido pats Todoroki's shoulder, sly smile playing on her lips, and cheeks shining under the phone lights from a sheen of sweat.

"Say what you will, but you're exposed." She passes a cup of water to Bakugo who gulps it down like oxygen. "You were both too obvious anyway. Courtesy of Inasa."

Todoroki flushes even redder.

Unknown: Hold on. That's not right. The readers will be confused if they start from here.

Unknown 2: You think? But I wanna get to the juicy part first.

Unknown: That's not how it works, you moron. Rewind it already.

Unknown 2: Fine fine. Don't blame me if you get bored.

Unknown: I won't get bored!

Unknown 2: Whatever you say, Mr. serious pants.

Unknown: Shut up.

Rewinds...

Todoroki swats a piece of clothing from his face, squinting in the darkness that shrouds him like a blanket. He feels around, finding a broken hanger, and a limb that isn't his.

"Holy shit. Who just touched my arm?" Kaminari squeaks bumping into something hard, because the thud is painful enough to make Todoroki wince.

An avalanche of cloth falls from...Todoroki can't really see much to tell.

But more clothes hit him square in the face, and he wonders, for the millionth time, how this happened.

And why is everything in here so itchy? Is it made of tinsel?

Laundry detergent stings his nostrils, and sweat beads on his forehead, trickling down his cheek all the way to his collar bone.

There's another thud, then a swear. Somebody snorts. Another hanger snaps.

"Have you ever seen Bakugo drunk before?" Kirishima asks with a grin that shows off his teeth, shining ominously in the darkness.

Todoroki doesn't have the heart to return with his own.

For someone being smooshed into the wall, Kirishima is much too chipper. Kaminari is all over him, looking much blinder than a bat. And making a ruckus.

How is he still alive?

"No, I haven't, but did you lock us in a closet to ask that?" Todoroki whispers, passing his hand through his hair that's grown sweaty.