Chapter 9

1.1K 60 10
                                    

A/N: Slight trigger warning. Sorry about the wait. Idk when it'll be updated again.

~Rissa

__________________________________________________________________

Carter pulled away from me and cleared his throat. His whole body was tense, and he looked between Isen and me. His eyes were guarded, not showing any emotion at all before he looked at me. "When will you move into the p-"

"I think the better question to ask her is if she is hungry or not," Isen said, interrupting him from speaking. He gave me a smug look when I sent him a scathing look before he looked at him. "Asking her when she will move into the packhouse is strictly forbidden."

Carter scowled. "Why?" he asked, his voice holding this hard tone in it, and I held back a flinch. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he let it out. "I'm sorry," he said and opened his eyes. "I didn't mean to have that hard tone in it." His voice was still hard, but it wasn't as hard as it was.

Wordlessly, I nodded and took a deep breath, and let it out with a soft hiss. I glanced at Isen and then back at Carter, knowing full well that Isen was trying to make sense of my jumbled thoughts.

"She is scared," Isen said, finally, and Carter looked at him and then back at me. His gaze was still on me, and I could tell that he was waiting for me to say something or not before he continued. "She doesn't know if the pack will accept her, especially since she is the reason your first mate is dead."

Carter set his jaw and didn't say a word. Pain filled his eyes, and I knew that he was still grieving the death of his first mate and his unborn child that had never fully developed.

"She is scared of what would happen behind closed doors, snide remarks or whatever," Isen said, continuing since I hadn't stopped him from talking. "She's barely hanging on as it is," he said, his voice becoming softer.

"What do you mean?" Carter asked. He looked between Isen and me, setting his jaw while he stopped his gaze solely on me.

I looked down and put my hands behind my back. My heart pounded hard in my chest, and it got a bit harder for me to breathe. Panic tried to settle onto me like a thick blanket, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop it.

Isen was right; I was barely hanging on as it was, which was why he kept popping up.

Because he liked poking around in my mind, Isen knew the secrets that I tried to keep hidden. He knew that there had been some dark days during the two years I had been with the Associan group, days that I didn't want out in the open.

Both Majesty and Sinopa knew my thoughts, but I had them swear that they wouldn't tell Jo, especially since I knew that it would hurt her for her to know.

She hadn't heard my thoughts because I figured out a way to block her from them, and that annoyed her to no end because I could still hear hers when we were close together.

"Anastasia?" Carter asked, his voice soft. He closed the distance between us and placed his hand under my chin, being gentle as if I was some fragile flower that needed to be handled with care.

I let him lift my chin and stared into his dark brown eyes, my heart pounding hard in my chest. I didn't say a word while I looked at him, my face blank and my eyes wide.

"Please," he said, his tone begging, and it took my breath away. "What is he talking about? What happened? What are you not telling me?"

I looked down as much as I could with him holding my chin and licked my lips. "I... umm..." I trailed off and cleared my throat. "I'm... suicidal..." My voice was barely above a whisper, but I knew that Carter heard me because he reared back in surprise and took his hand off my chin.

"What?" Carter asked.

"I am suicidal," I said again. I cleared my throat and shifted on my feet, keeping my hands behind my back. My hands were shaking from the amount of strain that I was under, and I had no idea if there was any way to relieve the stress that I was under.

"She's tried to commit suicide twice while she was at base before she found out she was pregnant," Isen said. He looked at me and then at Carter, his eyes changing to a dark shade of blue that only happened when he was upset. "Both times, I revived her because..." He trailed off and shifted in his seat, looking away from the two of us.

"Why?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. I didn't look at him and kept my face blank. "Why did you revive me?" I kept my gaze on Carter while he processed that information, making sure that he wouldn't see me panicking. "And don't say that you were doing it to keep me alive for the Anabie."

Isen sighed and moved a hand through his hair. "Because I promised the Gods that I would keep you alive," he replied, honestly. "They took a liking to you and the strength you carry. They wanted me to watch out for you."

I stole a glance at him while Carter stared at me, shocked. "Is that why you came both times?" I asked, and he subtly nodded. "How did you know?"

Isen looked up and flashed me a smirk. "That's for me to know and you to never find out," he chirped, and I scowled.

"Will you do it again?" Carter asked, and I looked at him. Pain filled his dark brown eyes, and he studied me.

I looked down and shook my head. "No," I said. "I swore to the Moon Goddess that I would stop," I added. "And.." I shrugged and looked at my sleeping child, and my heart grew warm with love. "I found the one thing that made me feel whole again." I cleared my throat and shrugged. "Sort of."

"What's missing?" Carter asked.

I looked at my mate and studied him. I slowly relaxed and was happy that I stopped shaking.

"Well?" Carter asked again and raised an eyebrow. "What's missing?"

"You." I cleared my throat and moved a hand through my hair. "You are the thing that is missing to make me feel whole again."

The Luna That I Replaced (Book 2 of Witfall Pack)Donde viven las historias. Descúbrelo ahora