my grandpa, my papa actually, had a stroke on saturday. kept it from everyone. then had to go to the hospital. he went to the hospital on monday. i wasn't able to see him that night and it tore me apart.
i've spent the last two days in a hospital now that i'm able to see him. i smell like disinfected blankets and depression. papa wasn't allowed to leave like he wanted to because his blood pressure and blood sugar were unbelievably high. frightening was what it was. he wasn't that far from death and he was trying to pretend that although he can't use the right side of his body that he was never better.
i was with my friends every second of it, they helped me. they hugged me while i cried and talked to me even when i yelled at them for trying to bring me food and be super nice.
"it's what friends are for." they said.
i wouldn't let cayd bring me mcdonald's, i wouldn't let tanner take me home, i wouldn't let tom see me cry, and i wouldn't let joe feel bad for just having surgery on his mouth and not being able to drive there. i tried. i think they all saw right through my transparent ass.
i love them though. they made it a lot easier.
i'm going to love life though a little less when they leave.
:/
_____
idk.
a sorta rant felt nice
i guess..
sorry.
-belle <\3
YOU ARE READING
one day i began to think
General FictionAlright, so this was formally known as lazy reads. It's no longer that. I do put short stories on here occasionally. OCCASIONALLY. But recently it's been a nice little public journal that really no one reads. What I publish is supposed to be someth...
