Bullied to a Werwolf's Mate?

Chapter 25

I couldn't move. No matter how hard I tried I just couldn't move a muscle. I can't believe he is actually kissing me. He should be repulsed by me right now. He should be pushing me away and be puking in a toilet right now, yet he is staying right here, kissing me. He pried my lips open with his own as his tongue dug into my mouth. My hands stay at my sides as my eyes are still wide open at his sudden action. His eyes open a little and once he sees my open eyes he helps me out a little. He grabs my arms and put them around his neck. He then brings one of his arms around my waist and the other in front of my eyes to close them. Once my eyes were closed he grabbed the back of my head and pushed my head closer to his so his tongue could dig deeper into my mouth.

As we kiss I felt him pushing more against me until we were walking backwards when my legs hit the bed and we fell onto the bed. I was so surprised that we separated for a moment until he forced our lips back together. His tongue wraps around my as we dance to a rhythm I never heard or felt of before. He wraps his arms around my waist and grinds on me a little. I felt so light headed that I had to take my mouth away from his and take deep breaths. Ryder didn't want to seem to stop at that. He moved his lips to my neck and sucked downwards. It felt like he was looking for something. Suddenly I felt a soft spot and moaned at him putting his lips there. I felt him smirk and suck harder. I began to shudder at the intensity of his lips. 

After a while he moved from the spot behind my ear and looked at my face. My face was still heated so I turned my head and saw the clothes in reach. I looked back at him with a smirk and he got a little worried look on his face. He leaned away from me a little bit until I was sure I can catch him off guard with my next sudden movement.

I quickly turned around, snatched the clothes, and bolted for the bathroom. When my hand was on the doorknob Ryder grabbed my waist and dragged me back until we were sitting on the bed. He whispered "Where do you think you are going?" 

I kept my head down as I muttered "I was going to change my clothes. Is that a problem?" 

I felt him smile against the back of my neck as he whispered "Yes," into my ear.

I laughed a little and turned so I could see his cute face. "And why is that?"

"Since we are mates we shouldn't be shy about changing in front of each other. We are going to mate one day so I want you to be okay with us changing in front of one another." I looked down a little miffed. He really wanted to look at my ugly body in an intimate way. I felt tears were starting to well up in my eyes, but I pushed them away as I stay silent. Ryder brought my face to look at his, but I refused to look at him. "Shit," he said "I didn't mean to make you cry. I think you are the most beautiful girl in the world and that is why I want to see your wonderful body. I don't think it is ugly at all, maybe a little underweight unhealthy looking, but I would find you beautiful if you were the fattest and weirdest faced girl in the world. You are my one true love and I want to spend every second of my life with you. Please." His last word broke my heart. The one thing he doesn't know about me is that I am already damaged on the outside and on the inside. If he sees me undress then he will see my cutting under my arm.

When I look up at his eyes I see that he is furious. What did I do now? He rips off the shirt I have on leaving me only in a bra. I scream a little and try to cover myself, but Ryder grabs my arm that I cut unlovable into and turned it over so we could see my marking. He freezes up once he sees it and that has me extremely worried. How in the world did he know about my cutting into the underside of my arm. Wait a minute. "Did you read my thoughts?" I will admit it I don't mind sometimes, but this time I am a little offended. He seemed to come out of his moment of being frozen and started to stroke my arm. I watched slowly as the mark began to disappear. Why would he do that? That was my reminder of what my life once was. I couldn't lose the girl that lived on that street since she was 8 years old. I just couldn't.

"Yes I did," before I could get a word in he said, "I did it because you were worrying me a little so I decided to listen into your thoughts a little bit. I caught the part about you cutting yourself so I took the chance at looking at one of your arms I saw this. Why would you do this? Why would you bring yourself pain? I am your mate and I am suppose to keep pain as far away from you as possible. Please, let me know why you would do such a thing."

I looked up at him with teary eyes as I started in a whisper "I can't lose her." Ryder giving me an extremely confused look until I spoke in a louder voice with more confidence "I can't lose the girl I once was when I lived on the streets. If I lose her I might end up a horrible person that I never wanted to be. That's why I did it. I can't turn into a cruel person so I needed something to remind myself of that. I just something to remind myself of that." He looked at me with the saddest look in the word then a spark.

"You have me," I had no idea what he was saying until he was able to explain further "You have me to keep you in line as you will do the same for me. If one of us starts to drift away from who we truly are then we will let the other know so we can get back on track. Please promise me to never hurt yourself again." I looked at him and I just had to ask this so I know how serious he is about this.

"What if I do it again?" Ryder gave me a look that made me shrink back little. He realized what I was worried a little and calmed down his features.

"Trust me you won't. If you do then I will be with you when you shower to keep you away from the razor. Either way we are going to be showering together more frequently together. Don't give me that look. I won't go in the shower with you anytime soon. I will go when I feel you would be okay with this. If you do cut yourself soon then I would give you no choice, but for me to be with you in the shower at all times. How about we just get dressed and go down for breakfast." 

I nod and ask "Can we not get undressed in front of each other right now? I still don't feel that comfortable yet."

He says "Alright. I will get dressed in the closet and when I finish I'll come out whether you are dressed or not."

I couldn't help, but ask "So you are coming out of the closet? Congratulations! I am so proud!" I laughed as he gave me a look that said you know what I mean. I laughed, got up, shoved him towards the closet, and slammed the door.

I then bolted towards the clothes and quickly get dressed. Before I could even get another bra on I felt arms go around my waist. I shrieked and curled into myself so that whoever it was wouldn't see anything. I turned and saw Ryder behind me with his eyes close. He said "I will have my eyes closed as you get dressed so you won't think of me as a pervert."

"Who is to say that I haven't already thought you were a pervert?"

Our banter continues until I am fully dressed. He grabs my hand as we walk out of the bedroom and down the stairs. As we enter the kitchen I freeze in place at the number of people in there. How the hell am I going to explain who I am to a third of the Moonlight Pack? This day just keeps on getting better and better.