About

About me you ask?
Ah! What a change from the past!
Cuz this world has barely any class.

I like raindrops and morning dew.
Why? I have no clue.
Many dragons I have slew,
with my bare hands, may I add too.

I adore the color green.
Though it might just be a phase of teens-
Just as skinny jeans
and the urge to be lean.

I hate dresses.
They're just messes.
Maybe if the were red-ish,
but that going off guesses.

Chocolate, I can't stand
"Why?!" You demand.
It's hard to understand.

Puppies I adore,
I can't resist their allure.
I have three, but want more.
But, alas! I'm too poor.

Lettuce is good.
Eat it as a snack, I would,
Just sneak it under my hood.

So inconstant this is.
But that's what makes me Liz.

By the way:

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
This really sucks,
So it's going into the loo.

Yeah, I'm not a good poet.
And yeah, I love AVPM and AVPS

When do I update?
Please don't hate,
but I don't have certain dates.
I wait until my ideas are great.

This is my lame way of saying I don't know when I update. I can't force myself to write, but I tend to update most commonly on weekends about every two weeks.

Please send banners or covers or any burning questions about my story to my Wattpad email: notpresent7@gmail.com.
Don't you just hate it when you have to add random numbers to an email you want and then it just ruins the whole thing?
  • Location:
    Wouldn't you like to know?
  • Joined:
    4 years ago

Reading Lists

Favorites
5 stories
PFS Competition
28 stories

3 Published Works

Featured work.

Project Fat Suit

Social data: 22.7M reads. 395K votes. 190K comments.

Description: Serena Davidson leads two lives. At school, she's a morbidly obese, stupid, nerdy, bitchy, slutty, and a teacher's pet. But at home she's the scrawny vegetarian pushover. What would possess someone to wear a fat suit every day? And what happens when...

#27 in Humor

Other Works by not_present.
One Shots

One Shots

16.8K 381 91

A collection of short stories that may or not make logical sense. Anyways, enjoy :)

Kidnapped for a Fancy Teapot?

Kidnapped for a Fancy Teapot?

23.6K 504 212

Evangeline Jones's life revolves around her parents' antique shop. Someone breaks in the middle of the n...

This comment may be offensive.
Hahahaha! I love those shitty replies and comments you popped in my notifs. Like what you said to me, this is my comments, my life! And I'm a 100% percent sure that you don't know me.....be patient? It's been 2 fucking years! I already gave up on this AUTHOR days ago so shut the fuck up!!
      PS: y'all so fucking annoying
Would you guys hate me if I tried to final the book? Sure, it won't to too much justice, since the book was really good, but I'll give her all the credit. The story was about to end anyways.
larry_morfin posted a message to not_present
today has been a year since you've updated pfs, although I am kind of upset that you haven't updated. I'm also proud of you bc your story is just so beautifully written. I want to say thank you for writing pfs bc you're awesome