》Loki's POV
I am sitting with brother in his room doing some kind of paper work he did not understand so well. At least I become useful once in a while.
I rest my chin over my knuckles as I read the document. My mind drifts off to an hour ago. I kissed Y/N again. My mother's request rang in my ear just as Y/N told me the reasons why I'm not a monster. Follow your heart.
I did.
I listened to it for just a second and I couldn't hold back from letting it show. I confessed, well kind of confessed. But what if I really choose Y/N? What if that's the path I should take? I mean, mother isn't wrong, Y/N is an exceptional woman, but she's a human. I can't chose her. I can't let my heart lead me away from common sense. Y/N is a human, she's bound to return home and live her full mortal life. I will be forever and she will not, so why am I listening to my heart when at the end both Y/N and I could end up badly hurt.
But I also want her. I do. I can't lie to myself even if lying is my game, my heart slaps me right across the face whenever I'm with her.
Why did I have to feel this way for, Y/N? Of all people, why her?
I grunt, standing up abruptly from my chair. I run my hands through my raven hair in frustration. I'm not Thor, I can't do this, I can't let my heart get the best of me. Thor can somewhat fall for a human, Jane is a mistake, it can't happen, and yet I feel like even with all the bickering I do with Y/N, she's the only one that can get me. I enjoy our little arguments, I like to tease her and piss her off. I will accept that I kind of enjoyed the day she almost murdered me in Odin's treasure room, but it was a little scary considering she wasn't herself at all, I enjoy it when she deliberately tries to murder me, and when it's mostly my fault because I'm teasing her too much or being an annoying brat.
I can't be attracted to her, I really can't. It would be wrong considering my position and her position and all of this ordeal and it's frustrating!
How can I want her after only knowing her for a couple of weeks? I don't even know who she is, what makes her herself. I know so little of her but my heart can't help but stutter at her everything.
What is wrong with me? Why do I feel this way? Why can't it just go away?
"Brother, is everything alright?" I hear Thor ask from the table. I turn to him and wave a hand at him as I pinch the bridge of my nose.
"I'm alright, brother. I just think I might be losing my mind a little."
Thor chuckles, giving me one of his brotherly smiles. Maybe if nothing had happened the day we went to Jotunheim, we would still be like before. Inseparable till the end.
"I think, losing your mind, doesn't count as being alright."
I sigh, a little annoyed that he isn't letting the topic go. "It's nothing, Thor. Let's get back to working."
"No, let's talk about whatever is bothering you. I know we don't talk the way we used to, mostly for all the things that have happened, but I want to make up for that lost time. I don't want any more war between us, brother."
I give Thor a small smile, I appreciate his effort, but I really don't want to talk about Y/N with him... it's embarrassing to think I have a... liking... towards her...
"I don't think that will be a good idea, Thor."
"Is it about father?"
"No."
"Mother?"
"No."
"The kids?"
"What, no!"
"Our friends?"
"No, Thor."
Thor's lips widen into a mischievous grin and I'm worried about the next attempt on guessing what is bothering me.
"Is it maybe, possibly, about Lady Y/N?" He wiggles his brows at me and I just keep my mouth shut.
But that was a wrong move because he starts to laugh really loudly. He slams a fist at the table as he holds his stomach, laughing like a maniac. We lost him.
"Oh for all the heavens! Do you have a crush on Y/N?"
I feel my cheeks heat up as I look away from him. Damn it why!
"Oh my, that makes sense! Where you two making out in the library cause she was as red as a tomato and your hair seemed like a bird made a nest in it."
I walk over to him and clasp a hand over his mouth, shushing him in anger. "Thor, I swear that if you don't shut up, you'll wish you did!"
Thor removes my hand from his mouth easily and smiles up at me, it annoys me deeply. "Oh my goodness, I never thought that you would ever fall in love with someone, specially not a midguardian, at least not when you criticized me for loving Jane. How did that happen?"
I sit down next to him again but I lay my head down, banging my forehead lightly on the table. "I can't call it love, brother. Maybe I'm a little attracted to her, but I'm not in love. She doesn't feel the same way, how would she when I'm such a jerk?"
"Man, you are whipped brother!" Thor contemplates, and I hold a hand up to him in annoyance.
"I'm not whipped, or whatever that means. Just let it go, it will pass, it means nothing." I tell him, looking to the paper work on the table.
"I just know, brother, that Y/N is a special one, so don't hurt her. If it does or doesn't mean anything, follow your heart."
There it goes again, the same words mother said.
"Whatever," I mutter, grabbing the paper to get back to business, "let's do our work."
I can't let her into my heart, because if I do, I won't be able to let her go. She's a human and I'm an immortal being. I can't let her fall for me, because at the end of the day someone is bound to get hurt.
》Y/N's POV
After that... awkward... embarrassing moment with Loki, I made my way to my room and took a shower with the thought of spending time with the kids as it has been a long time since I've had the chance to teach kids.
I put on one of the pretty silk gowns in the trunk given to me by Thor not too long ago. He gave me a trunk full of gowns used in Asgard as I had no attires to wear except for my uniforms.
I comb my hair down from it's tight pony tail letting it loose.
Once I'm done I get out of my room thinking about the things I could do with the kids to pass the time. I don't know exactly what Asgardian children do to pass the time, the only thing I know so far is the kids' hobbies.
As I ponder the activities the kids might enjoy I come across the Queen.
I bow politely at Frigga as she passes by, but she doesn't go to far as she turns around and shoots me a smile. "Lady Astrid, I was wondering when would we have the chance to talk." She tells me, "Would you care to accompany me on a walk?"
I'm a little surprised that the Queen herself would even think about walking with me. I give her a firm nod and walk towards her.
She turns to the women with her, "You can go on ahead, Astrid will sure take care of me."
The women bow, walking away from us. Now in an empty hallway, I stand besides Frigga.
I take a good look at her and I'm in awe at her beauty. The perks of being a goddess am I right?
Thor looks quite physically similar to Odin and Frigga, unlike Loki... well he isn't exactly their child either...
I don't know why but my mind drifts off to earlier, to the passionate kiss we shared not too long ago in the library.
"I thank you for accompanying me." Frigga says, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"Oh, no need to thank me your highness, it is an honor."
As we walk I find we are walking towards the garden. The days here in Asgard are very beautiful. It is never gloomy and that is very surprising.
Frigga sits down on a stone bench right next to a bush of silvery roses.
"Don't you think Y/N is a very lovely name?"
For a second I don't get what Frigga means, but then it just come at me, hitting me like a truck. Holy fu-
"Y/N? It really does seem quite of an... unusual... name... very lovely indeed..."
Frigga chuckles and I can't help but frown a little. I feel like this is the last thing I'll hear. Still I try to act as if unbothered.
"Your name is quite interesting Lady Y/N. I wonder why Loki decided to name you Astrid, I mean you do great justice to the name, you are quite a beautiful woman, still Y/N suits you well."
Okay, my heart is going to explode...
My heart starts to raise. Should I start running?
"I'm sorry my lady, but I don't know what you mean..."
Frigga holds a hand up to shush me and gives me a sweet smile. "Y/N, you don't have to worry. I know you are currently panicking, internally that is. Loki knows that I know who you are and you don't have to worry about Odin finding out about you. Your secret is safe with me."
I place a hand over my heart and exhale a breath in relief. "Oh by the heavens! I was starting to think I needed to run for dear life!"
Frigga laughs, a melodious sound. "No, not at all. See, I brought you here because I wanted to talk to you about Loki."
I furrow my brows in confusion, "What about him?"
"Well, as you know, he knows that I know about you. I'm doing everything in my power to keep your secret safe. Besides that, you know I'm the goddess of family and I'm sensing something strong between you both. I can't decipher it completely but I know it is affecting him as it is affecting you. So my question to you is, how do you feel about Loki?"
I'm a little shocked at her question considering Loki and I basically made out an hour ago, we also kissed a few days ago an stuff has been a little... weird... between us.
"Uh... well... I can't really say I have feelings for him your highness." I confess looking down to my feet.
It is the truth though. I don't know what is wrong with me lately. I the have this weird feeling when I'm with him and you obviously don't make out with random guys just because. But I can't say I like him or that I'm in love, that is a very strong word for the way I feel but it is not that at all.
"Then, what do you feel?"
I sigh at the question, how can I answer that?
Frigga places a hand on my shoulder and when I turn my face towards her she gives me a reassuring smile. "Answer with your heart."
I look up at the sky, trying to figure out what to say at all. "With my heart?" I mutter as memories of the past month come rushing to me.
I can't help the heat that creeps onto my cheeks with embarrassment.
"I guess that... I'm really attracted to him." I bite my bottom lip as I cannot look at Frigga in the eye. Birth mother or not, Frigga is still Loki's mother and it is extremely embarrassing to tell her I'm attracted to her son. "I'm a weird way I am very... VERY attracted to him. I don't know how the attraction sparked but it did. I'm really sorry but Loki is freaking annoying, sometimes I just want to punch him and then sometimes I want to kiss him and ugh! It's complicated!"
I hide my face in my hands as I grumble, but Frigga just chuckles next to me.
"It's alright, Loki is a special one. Now that you are being sincere to yourself, I can only ask of you one thing."
I look up at Frigga as she talks, "Yes?"
"I won't ask you to love him, no one should be forced to love another, but the only thing I want from you is for you to give him a chance, maybe not romantically but don't be so quick to judge him. Loki... Loki needs all the help he can get to redeem himself. You my dear are the only one that can get him through this. You are kind, compassionate, intelligent, passionate and most importantly you have principles that can help Loki to the goal. He is the god of mischief, but even a trickster like him deserves a little understanding. He think he's alone in this universe, but I know that there is a bigger reason for you to be here."
Those words gets stuck with me after our conversation is over.
He think he's alone in this universe, but I know that there is a bigger reason for you to be here.
What does the universe want from a miserly human like me?
A/N:
AAAAHHHHH I FINALLY WROTE IT!!!!
Took me a week and a half to figure out how to write this :")
I've been going back and forth with this book and Our Love Maze cause I've been editing and also thinking about how to continue Butterfly so it's been a week of lots of thinking. (Even if I'm on a Winter break there is always work to do.)
Anyway what do you think is that feeling Frigga is sensing between Loki and Y/N?
You will probably hate me a little next chapter... but my books are not complete if there is no drama involved so... welcome to the Hunger Games! (oh wait, wrong fandom...)
That's all for today!
I hope you enjoy your winter vacations!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
Next update will be on Friday!
Don't forget to like my story and comment!
-Random Potato♡