It was as if all the words in my throat went dry and I began to choke on the air itself. My heart quickened to a rate at which I thought it was going to burst from my chest. I could no longer breathe, but rather hyperventilate as I watched the man before me. The world seemed to come to a complete stop and my vision became blurred.
I opened and closed my mouth,gasping for air as well as my sanity. The wind had dried my tears, leaving faint red streaks underneath my eyes. A sense of dread seeped deep into my veins, the kind that almost seems to make your hairs stand on edge. Though, it was not the man himself that struck fear in every part of my body, but the strong urge to be embraced by his warm grey eyes.
Those grey eyes that seemed to call me near.
That made my heart pound and ache at the same time.
The eyes that reminded me so much of my own.
This time I was sure it was not a boggart, but the real Sirius Black in the flesh. He continued to watch me, his face contorted into one of concern and yearning. For he too, wished to be embraced by me,an invisible force beckoning him in.Studying me carefully, he cautiously reached out his hand and placed it on top of mine.
His touch felt like listening to all your favorite records on a Sunday morning. It felt like reading in the library on a rainy day.That sense of overwhelming comfort was generated by his mere touch. All of the nights I spent countless hours wondering what home felt like,this was it. My mind screamed to run away or hide,but my body felt the need to remain in place.
"Delilah." The man breathed out. My name rolled pleasantly off of his tongue. Almost like he had just remembered what it felt like to say it. Almost like it was a privilege to simply speak my name.
" I won't hurt you." He whispered. His eyes were glossed over and mouth set in a deep frown.
"I know." I shakily respond,not even registering what I said. His head jerked up at my voice and a smile ghosted his lips.
"What do you know?" The question was so quiet I thought I had imagined it.But as he sat looking at me for a response, I realized I had heard correctly.
" I know that I should not be so friendly with a mass murderer." He lets out a barking laugh at my response. The laugh that plagued my dreams and the thoughts of my past. Without so much as moments warning, I threw my arms around the disheveled man.
I felt him stiffen under my contact, the close proximity being foreign. After a few seconds, his limbs relaxed and I felt his arms tighten around me.
"Aren't you afraid?" He whispered into my ear. His warm breath fanned across my cheek as I buried my face into his shoulder. Inhaling the familiar scent of smoke and sugar, a light giggle escaped my lips.
"You would think so." I reply, still giggling at the absurdity of it all. Untangling my arms from his hold, I leant back up against the tree and released a deep sigh.
"Rough day?" He mused,quirking up an eyebrow. I let out a loud laugh and shook my head.
"What would make you think that? Totally not like I'm talking to a bloody Azkaban escapee that has happened to be my dog best friend for the entire year." I sarcastically respond.
"Yeah that could come as quite a shock, and I haven't even got to the point where I tell you I'm your father." He chuckled but abruptly stopped and widened his eyes. Realizing the slip of words he slowly dragged his hand over his face in stupidity. Nervously scratching his neck and looking for my reaction he shyly grinned.
"Welp guess the cats out of the bag,or should I say dog?" He shrugs his shoulders and leans on the tree behind him.I was still processing his words and could only open and close my mouth in shock. After a couple minutes, I regained my senses and looked back up.
" So you are where I get my humor from!" I exclaim and point my finger at him. We both erupt in laughter, rolling on the ground.
"This is so weird" Sirius wheezes out in between laughs.
" Not as weird as my best friend being a dog." I sit up,still snickering.
"True, but at least he was a handsome dog." He winks and I roll my eyes.
" So I'm guessing you're the actual Padfoot, the one who is Remus' old friend."
" You got me." He cheekily responds and raises his hands in mock surrender.
"And I'm also gonna go out on a limb here and say that you gave me the cassette for Christmas as well as this locket." I hold up the locket in between my fingers and give him an amused smile.
"Once again,guilty as charged." Sirius grins
" So are you guilty of the crimes that got you locked up in Azkaban?" I question while crossing my arms.
" Of course not, I would never kill Lily and James, they were like family. And I sure as hell wouldn't do anything for that noseless prick Voldemort ." He scoffs and turns his nose up in disgust.
" Then who did?" I ask with confusion written on my features.
" One of our other friends, Peter Pettigrew, that pathetic rat." He spits and clenched his fists at his sides.
" How'd he do it?"
" He was also an unregistered Animagus, and was able to flee the scene without being seen. He happens to have the animal form of a rat which is why he could escape so easily." Sirius explains.
" Wait so what's with all the Animagus shit?"
" Well you see, me,James, and Peter decided to become unregistered Animagus to help Remus out.James was a deer ,Prongs was his nickname, Peter had the nickname worm tail, and I was Padfoot obviously." He gives me a wink and shows off his large canines.
" Why did you need to help Remus?" I ask, genuinely confused.
" Oh you haven't figured out his furry little problem by now? He's a werewolf, we became Animagus to help him on full moons." Sirius crossed his arms behind his head and lays his feet on my lap.
" So that's why his nicknames Moony, I thought it was because he was pale or something." I laugh
" How do you know his nickname?" He raises his eyebrows in surprise .
" He told me.We actually get along quite well,besides the whole fight we just had because he wouldn't tell me about you." I sigh
" It's not his fault, I told him that I wanted to be the one to break the news before I was sent away." He casts an apologetic look towards the castle where his office was.
" I suppose, I just still haven't quite comprehended the fact that you're my father. Like the real deal , not like Lucius who scolds me if I say thank you to the house elf." I look out across the grounds.
" Well so far you're taking it strangely well" He chuckles and I shift my gaze back to him.
"Yeah well I guess I must have subconsciously knew ." I shrug and slightly smirk
" You must get that wit from your mother." He softly smiled and shifts his gaze to the ground.
" My mother?" I gulp and shakily play with my hair.
" Yes, but how about we save that for another time.I think discovering about one parent is enough for today." He chuckles and softly traces over my knuckles with his thumb.
" I suppose.." I disappointedly drawl and sag my shoulders. Sirius was right though, too much more information and I felt like my brain was gonna explode.
" Listen Delilah, you can't tell anyone about any of this. If anyone where to know that you're my daughter it would put you at great risk." He worriedly looks at me and squeezes my hand.
" It's okay, I don't think anyone would believe me anyway." I smile
" I'm afraid that I have to go for now, as much as I would like to stay." He sadly begins to stand and holds out his hand to help up.
"Can I see you again?" I ask eagerly, this new sense of family feeling almost like a drug.
" Eventually yes, but not for another long while." He frowns and takes my hands in his.
" As long as you make me a mixtape for next time we see each other, I'll be fine." I grin and we both tackle each other in a hug. We stood in one another's warm embrace for a long while, soaking it all in. Reluctantly, we pulled away and he gently placed his lips on the top of my head .
"Goodbye my little Padfoot." Sirius smiled with tears in the corners of his eyes. Backing away, he transformed into the familiar fury black dog. I gave him one final wave before he trotted back in the direction he came. Walking back into the school, I shook my head recalling the events that had just taken place.
Over the short period of time I had discovered that bloody Sirius Black was my father. A man thought to be a murderer, was my dad, and I was not the least bit ashamed. He was kind and loving and everything a father should be. He was everything that I had dreamt about. The man I had met in a dream was no longer, he was real and he was Sirius Black.