WARNING: SOME MAY FIND TRIGGERING.
Dedicated to @weirdfina for being so amazing and supportive! Thank you!
(The poem below I wrote myself -- I thought it went well with the chapter..)
How do you sleep at night
Knowing what power you hold,
Consuming my fire; eternal love.
To strengthen your weakness.
Abate my strength,
Remove it from me.
What fun is it to have
Me filled with glee?
Will you sleep with me tonight?
Hold me one time.
Make me worth a diamond
Claim me -- you're mine!
Possess what I never had
And lend it out to me,
Help me to grow--
As this life's what will be.
Will you sleep with me tonight?
So I can feel valued, loved;
Not feel like the black sheep;
Empty with sorrow, joy all gone.
Purge me, cure me, cleanse me.
You're mine.
This poisoned love
Is not worth my time.
But,
will you sleep with me tonight?
It may cure my irrevocable
damage.
Wash away my pain
Like a river's flood;
Erase my memories,
The darkness -- for good.
Chapter 21 - Feeling Sorrow
Indigo~
My palms were sweating but I felt strangely calm.
Instead of panicking I felt entranced by the whispering breeze as I opened the balcony doors and stepped out into the cold night, shivering at its touch.
Come to me..., The trees seemed to whisper as I neared the balcony's edge which overlooked the empty street.
Come to me... The strange voice repeated.
Shuddering with a sick kind of pleasure, I triumphed at the fact that for once something wanted me -- even if it was just the dark night itself, imploring me to fall to my death.
Branches scraped against each other and leaves flapped brilliantly, making the breeze sound like a hiss.
Not thinking clearly, I quickly raised my leg over the railing and settled myself on top.
Being five stories up meant that I was high off the ground - very high, in fact.
High enough to be proven fatal for a vampire if they fell.
And I intended it to be just that. Fatal.
Swivelling as best I could, I sat on top of the railing so that my back was facing the street, and smiled manically at my reflection in the balcony doors.
I was a princess.
My family was of royal blood. We didn't do weakness or vulnerability.
We were the elite of a race far superior to humans in terms of brute force, strength and riches.
Yet here I was, at my most vulnerable, because of some rich vampire player who couldn't keep his hands off women who weren't his wife. Off women who weren't me.
My family would be better off without me. I had destroyed their honour. Our honour.
Closing my eyes, I savoured the sweet sound of the beautiful night and the moonlight which brightened my eyelids, before taking my last breath.
With a final jerk, I tilted myself backwards, beginning the end of Indigo-Rose Valentino.
****************
Adrian~
It was late. Or early, depending on which way I looked at it.
At two am in the morning I was pacing my bedroom, feeling unusually restless and on edge. Guilt. That's what it was.
The undeniable regret which was currently nestled in the deepest recesses of my heart, was continuing to make me despise my own existence. And only pity Indigo's.
I had someone who could (and would) mean more to me than the world itself, and what had I done?
I'd slept with the same individual I had vowed never to get involved with again.
Indigo was worth more than this. She deserved better - more than what I could give her, but no matter how much I tried to reason with myself to give her up I just couldn't do it.
Indigo was still mine, and nothing could deter me from having her. Not even my own disgusting, selfish acts.
I was halfway through pacing when I felt it.
A strong feeling of dread began to wash over me and I trembled, shaking violently. Somehow, I managed to dial her number with shaking hands.
The witch immediately picked up. 'Master.'
'What's happening to me?' I barked.
She seemed to know what I was going on about. The witch inhaled sharply which was followed by the sound of urgent shuffling.
Seconds later she spoke. 'It's Indigo-Rose, master.' Her usually strong voice shook.
The blood instantly drained from my face. 'What about her?' I asked.
'She... tried to commit suicide.'
The phone fell from my hands.
***************
Indigo~
I hurt. Everywhere.
The one thing that stood out was the agonising pain in my back. I let out a scream when my body jerked involuntarily causing my back to consume me with a deep pain.
Never in my life had I felt something so excruciating. If I could die then, I would, as anything was better than the burning fire that seemed to spread and sear through my arms and legs.
My head felt heavy and by the strong scent of blood I could tell that I was bleeding out fast.
Closing my eyes, I immediately relaxed when I felt the excruciating burning being replaced with a cold numbness.
I was going to die...
Lights were flashing. Anxious voices echoed around me, momentarily disturbing my peace.
'Indigo, stay with me honey.' That voice sounded like my mom.
I tried to open my eyes but found I couldn't. Was I dead?
How come I could hear my mother?
Suddenly, I gained control of my body and my eyes snapped open painfully as I took in the blurring white corridors.
I was lying in a mobile bed, being sped through a vampire hospital with nurses and doctors at both sides.
My mother was beside me, grabbing hold of my hand as best she could. 'Indigo, honey. Please stay with me.' Her plea was desperate.
I tried to move my lips to speak but at that moment one of the doctors injected something into my arm and I was gone to the world.
**************
Adrian~
'Master?' The sound of the witch's frantic voice could be heard from the speaker. I took no notice.
Instead I let out a bloodcurdling howl as my fangs extended, tearing through my gums. Feeling the beast rise within me, I stormed through my mansion, seeing nothing but red, before bursting out of the front door and running aimlessly across the drive way.
I had to get to her.
I had to find Indigo.
****************
Indigo~
When I reopened my eyes it was to see a faint light streaming in through the window, from outside.
Beside me, my parents sat looking tired and anxious while my brother stood, pacing the room.
When they noticed I was awake they all rushed towards me, my mother letting out a strangled cry.
'Indigo-'
'Thank God-'
'You're awake!'
They all spoke at once and before long I was being assessed by a pleased-looking doctor and visited by various friends and relatives.
When Stacey came in she ran straight over to my bed, teary-eyed and squeezed me into a tight hug.
'You're alive!' She sniffed before crushing me again. I patted her arm.
'It would seem so.' My heart gave a tiny squeeze at that tiny admission but I decided to ignore it.
She punched me. Hard. 'I can't believe you would do this to me!'
My eyes widened. She couldn't have known about my circumstances could she? She didn't appear to be too distressed, so I guessed not.
'You know how I hate hospitals.' She continued, oblivious to my silent debate. 'Next time be more careful when you're leaning over a balcony!' She almost screamed at me.
I instantly relaxed, and gave her a weak smile. 'I will, don't worry.' I told her before patting her on the arm again.
The only one who could've explained what had happened to everyone was my cousin Lily. For her sake, I could only hope she believed it herself or else I would have a huge problem on my hands.
When it was Stacey's turn to leave (which she did so reluctantly), Lily walked in, carrying a huge bouquet of flowers.
Without saying a word, she calmly placed them on the windowsill.
'Lily...'
She studiously ignored me as she slowly made her way over to the plastic chair that was beside my bed and sat down in it. Her expression was inscrutable.
I swallowed loudly and tried again. 'Lily-'
'You were on your back.' Her voice held no emotion. I fiddled with the bedsheets. 'When we found you.' Her eyes bore into mine as she continued.
'If you'd have simply fallen you wouldn't have landed on your back.'
'Lily--'
She held her hand up to silence me. It was only then that I could see the true emotions swirling behind her eyes, emotions that she was trying so hard to keep hidden. She looked hurt, worried and angry. Fuming, in fact. And not scared... But terrified.
My heart swelled for her and for everyone that had suffered because of me.
'Lily, I'm sorry.' The silence in the room was becoming unbearable. I wanted her to say something.
'Why did you do it?' She asked, her eyes shining with tears.
'Does everyone know?' I responded instead. She shook her head, expression vulnerable.
'Just the doctors.' She clarified. 'They needed to know the position we'd found you in. No one else knows.' Without warning, a bitter laugh escaped from her chest which shocked me. 'They all think you fell.'
I cringed. This wasn't the Lily I knew. The Lily I knew was happy; carefree.
Instead, the Lily in front of me looked like a shell, a shadow of her former self.
And it was all my fault.
My throat burned. 'Lily, please. I'm so, so sorry. Please forgive me.' Now the tears fell, burning my cheeks. My hands balled into fists.
Suddenly, she clutched at my hand closest to her as if it was a life line. 'Promise me,' Her eyes sparkled with desperation as she looked into mine and whispered frantically. 'Promise me that you'll never do something like that ever again, Indigo. Promise me!'
By now her lips were trembling and her nose was running. She sniffed.
Having no other choice, I simply nodded. 'I promise.' A lump lodged itself in my throat the minute I said the words.
The truth was, I honestly didn't know if I was going to do it again.
The pain of Adrian's betrayal had caused me to snap in ways that I had never imagined I could, and although there was so much worse to life than what I had experienced thus far, it didn't stop me from feeling quite so weak and helpless.
And ashamed.
It also didn't take away the pain that I felt -- no matter how minor it was compared to everyone else's.
Adrian's betrayal had stung deep. It would take a lot to get past it.
'Promise me you won't tell anyone.' I whispered to her as we heard was a small commotion in the hallway. Someone was coming.
She nodded once, sniffed again. 'I promise.' She whispered back.
I was just about to say something else when the hospital door burst open, revealing the devil himself looking tired, haggard and most of all angry.
He looked murderous.
Adrian.
VOTE. COMMENT. FOLLOW.
Sorry it's so choppy! I'll try to avoid this in future but this was the only way I could think on how to set it out..