It's December now, and everyone's getting into the Christmas spirit. Christmas trees are glowing in Windows, lights sparking on doorways... Everyone is decorated for Christmas.
Everyone but Castiel.
He's not a Christmas person. He barely celebrates the holiday. Coming from a family as religious as his, the day's never been about presents and chocolate; it's Jesus's birthday, and Castiel doesn't particularly want to wish him a happy birthday after all the hell the guy's put him through.
Right now, he's sitting in front of Jo's TV and listening to Dean talk about how excited he is to bounce up onstage at the Jingle Bell Ball for the first time next week, dressed in a Santa hat and "the ugliest Christmas sweater the world has ever seen," in his words. They'd already been FaceTiming when he sure showed up for a "date," and he certainly wasn't going to tell them no.
Castiel doesn't mind people talking about Christmas. He doesn't care for the holiday, but he doesn't hate it. He'll still go down south a little ways to hang out with Charlie, so it's not like Christmas is a total waste of time, and he's glad other people seem to enjoy it more than he does. He's no Grinch, and he's happy about that.
And then the topic of conversation turns to Christmas plans, and that's a little less fun.
"Do you really think we can make it without anyone catching us?" Dean asks. "I mean, the paps are probably gonna stake your place out just to see if they can get a shot of you through the window."
"It'll be fine," Jo assures him. "I'll lie and say I'm at my LA house for the holidays. The paps won't look for me in Nebraska if they think I'm in LA."
"No, they probably will, but fine," Dean says. "Catch me pulling up to your place in a hoodie and sunglasses, just in case."
Jo shakes her head, amused. "How 'bout you, Cas? What are your holiday plans?"
"I'm gonna visit a friend," Castiel says with a shrug.
"A friend?" Jo repeats, confused. "You're not gonna go see your brothers?"
Oh shit. People usually spend Christmas with their families, don't they? Uh...
"Not this year," Castiel says vaguely.
"Why not?"
Oh, come on.
"Well, my friend doesn't really have a family, so I'm keeping her company," Castiel says, which is technically true. "She doesn't really get along with my family, so I've got to pick and choose."
"Man, that sucks," Jo says with a frown.
Castiel risks a glance at Dean. Jo may not know the truth about his family, but Dean does. Castiel can't help but wonder what he's thinking, hearing these excuses that he knows are complete bullshit. Does he understand what's really going on?
"Well, hey," Dean says with a shrug. "If you and your friend want to borrow a family, I'm sure Jo's got room for one or two more."
Castiel freezes. Is this a joke? He can't seriously be suggesting that Castiel spend Christmas with the Winchesters and the Harvelles — that he bring Charlie to spend Christmas with them. That wouldn't end well. He can practically guarantee it.
Jo, on the other hand, is overjoyed. "Oh my god, Cas, do it! We'd love to have you! The more, the merrier, right?"
"I don't know..." Castiel says awkwardly.
"Oh, come on," Jo insists. "We're hanging out for the full week. You could even just stop in for a couple days."
"Well..." God, how does he say no to this without sounding like an asshole? She's literally offering to be a temporary family for two people who don't have one, and he's going to turn it down? He doesn't know how to go about that.
"You don't have to, obviously," Dean says quickly, jumping to his defense. "Now that I think about it, I don't think Jo has enough beds at her place."
"No, no, don't even worry about that," Jo says. "We've got couches everywhere. I'm sure we can kick, like, Ash out of his room for a week. I don't know. We'll make it work. Just do it, Cas!"
Castiel looks to Dean helplessly. Why did he have to bring this up? Castiel didn't want this. Why would Dean think he did?
"Maybe his friend wouldn't want to," Dean offers. "Maybe they've got other plans."
Castiel gives him a small smile as a thank you.
"Oh, maybe," Jo agrees, but she perks up quickly. "You should call him!"
"I don't know," Castiel says. "They might be working."
"What does he do?" Jo asks. "Who even is this friend?"
"Charlie, um..." Castiel pauses. "I don't really know. Charlie works with computers." That's what she does, right? That's why she has a cubicle? God, what even is Dick Roman Enterprise?"
"Is that not a 9-to-5 job?" Jo asks, confused. "It's Saturday, Cas. Most full-time jobs like that don't tend to go into the weekend. That's what the weekend is."
"Oh, right..."
"Come on, call him!" Jo insists. "Ask him right now!"
"You don't have to call him if you don't want to," Dean tells him. "You know this Charlie person better than we do. If you think he'd rather celebrate Christmas at home..."
"No, come on, call him," Jo insists. "Put him on speaker! I wanna meet him!"
It's pretty obvious that he doesn't want to go. Dean picked up on it immediately. Clearly, Jo's too excited at the thought to even see that he's trying to turn the idea down. Castiel glances at Dean again, who looks really guilty for starting this. Unfortunately, neither of them have much to say to stop it.
Castiel fights back a sigh. "I don't know if this makes a difference, but Charlie's a girl, not a guy."
Jo's smile wavers for the briefest moment at that. That explains a lot. She probably thought Castiel had some secret hot man friend that she could hit on. Maybe this is his out.
But then Jo's smile returns. "Yeah, no, that's fine! Any friend of yours is a friend of mine. Go ahead, give her a call."
Castiel gives one last glance at Dean before pulling out his phone. He finds Charlie's contact, but he hesitates for a moment before hitting that little green telephone. Charlie was never supposed to get pulled into the celebrity life. On the bright side, though, that means she'll probably turn it down, and Castiel won't be the bad guy.
"Cas, I think I figured out who my secret admirer is, and she's actually really hot," Charlie says as soon as she picks up the phone, spitting it all out in one breath.
"And you're just telling me this now?" Castiel asks, feeling a little bit offended. She's been out of work for almost 24 hours. There's no excuse to keep that from him this long. "I am going to have to call you back later for the details on that, though."
"What could possibly be more important than my love life?" Charlie asks.
"Clearly a lot, or you would have called me first," Castiel says, earning some very confused looks from Dean and Jo. "I am about to put you on speaker, but before I do, I would like to remind you that I am rich and I can hire an assassin without making a dent in my bank account."
Dean bursts out laughing at that, and Jo just looks confused. This isn't quite the side of him that she knows. It's not quite the side of him Dean knows, either, but he's apparently got a good sense of humor.
"Duly noted," she says. "Who am I going to be talking to?"
"Dean and —"
"Okay, speaker, now!" Charlie says immediately.
Castiel sighs. "Remember. Assassin."
"Gotcha."
Castiel puts her on speaker and leaves his phone on the floor for everyone to hear. "Okay, Charlie, you're on speaker."
"Hi, Dean!" she says immediately, and Castiel honestly debates hanging up on her now.
"Jo's here too, but you didn't let me finish that one," Castiel says.
"Wait, seriously?" Charlie scoffs. "If this is my Christmas present, clearly I need to get you a better one."
"Well, no, not quite," Castiel says. "Jo has a question for you."
He braces himself for whatever comes next. Charlie has never mingled with the A-list crowd before. She's ranted and raved about how hot various female celebrities are — Jo Harvelle included — but she's never spoken to them before. He doesn't expect this to go well.
But Charlie just says a calm, "Then I have an answer for Jo."
Okay, so far so good.
"Cas told me that you two are spending the holidays alone, and I was wondering if you wanted to hang out with my family and the Winchesters instead," she says.
"What? Yes!" Charlie says immediately. "Obviously! God, Cas, why'd you even call me for something like that? Of course I was gonna say yes."
"Oh, cool!" Jo says with a grin. "I'll have Cas get all the information to you — you know, dates, an address, all that."
"I can't wait!"
"Well," Dean remarks. "That was a lot easier than I'd expected."
"Oh, yeah," Castiel mutters. "Very easy."