Iftia: Sarein, West Iftia
• Willow •
Willow's world was always quiet and without a sound. Like a quiescent snowflake that fell from the skies to kiss the earth, her life drifted and sailed in silence. Whiteness in light that shone too brightly into nothingness, darkness as a canvas for dreams to be painted on, the stillness in her life grew deep without a single vibration that brokered in the air.
Feeling a tap on her arm, she turned and glanced straight at the lips belonging to an overly attractive man. The softness of it moved to pronounce the syllabus properly. She recognised the shape of her name, "Willow."
She always wondered how his voice sounded like whenever he called her. Even when she couldn't hear, there was so much warmth that brimmed within her. The man in front of her asked questions — too many questions. He was interested to speak to her even when she was unable to respond to him and hold a proper conversation with him like how normal people could. He was also patient with her and whenever he asked her a question, he would wait for her response no matter how long she took to reply to him.
Dropping her head to the side, she was gesturing for him to speak and he asked, pacing his words slow enough for her to read, "What are you knitting?"
Lip reading was something that her parents taught her since she was young, it was their way of communicating with her and now, it was her way of understanding everyone else that talked to her. However, it would always take a while for her to comprehend the lip movements of someone and it wasn't always right; there's always a possibility of misunderstanding when two people spoke different languages.
Willow mostly kept to herself and avoided having long conversations with anyone, until him. It wasn't embarrassing when they had mismatched conversations at times and he was attentive to slow down or rephrase himself whenever it got difficult for her to understand. Slowly, she found herself writing more words to him each time. More and more. Till it resembled how normal people would talk to each other on any occasion.
As usual, he waited for her reply. His eyes were gazing into hers and it was too easy to get lost within the mesmerising colours. The gold that lay within the crevasses of blue were vividly clear with fragments of thoughts, splinters of words and wisps of emotions that coalesced into kaleidoscopic awe.
A sudden skip of her heart caused her to realise the intensity of his stare and she remembered everything between them the night before, when they sat a little too close together by the fireplace. It was the first time she witnessed a gift and it was the first time she felt it against her skin. A rush of heat surfaced on her face and she became all flustered, not knowing what to do. Willow hastily wrapped the scarf she was knitting around his neck to answer to his question.
Then, his expression changed slightly. The smile on his face was pulled a little wider from each side of his lips and she assumed that he was laughing from the way his shoulder shook lightly with each reverberation of his laugh. Her heart pounded a little harder this time, and she stunned. Willow thought about how this man appeared in her life all of a sudden without any logical explanation, without any warning. She couldn't help but think of the words he left her with from last night, and he made sure that she understood him clearly when he said: I want to get to know your world, Willow.
All the stories that he told her left her in awe by how much he had seen from the realm. His world was amazing wide and filled with boundless adventures. That was why it confused her when she tried to figure out what he meant when he wanted to understand her world and the soundless bubble she lived in. There was nothing magical and incredible about a normal person like her. Everything that he saw within this space was her, every scene that he witnessed in the small village of Sarein was her whole life and this was just how small her world was as compared to his.
In front of her, Arell unwrapped the scarf on his neck and wrapped them in it, he was beaming when he said, "You've been knitting this since the morning and the scarf is long enough for both of us now."
Now that he mentioned it, Willow looked towards the unusually long woollen muffler. A funny smile broke in her expression and all of a sudden she felt his hands on both sides of her waist, his fingers wiggling as though he was trying to tickle her. Her back straightened in reflex, her eyes widened in surprise and she quickly grabbed onto his wrists to stop him. Arell stopped, but a playful glint danced across his eyes when he requested, "I want to hear your voice again."
Willow shook her head nervously and looked towards the man in front of her. He leaned closer to her and there was always a weird feeling fuzzing in her chest whenever he got close. Her gaze moved from his eyes and traced along with each sharp and perfect feature of his face. She slowly loosened her grip on his wrists and carefully landed them on his broad, lean shoulders. Arell was much taller when he stood, but so close whenever he lowered himself to sit on the floor in front of her. His hair was dark and the colour was as deep but she was sure that the strands would be extremely smooth when tangled between her fingers. His eyes were too magnetising to continue staring at and she felt his chest rising and falling against her palm with each enunciation when she looked towards his lips that moved in the shape of her name again, "Willow."
She also wanted to call his name in return but not being able to hear her own voice only made her insecure and afraid. She wondered if her voice sounded scratchy or squeaky; loud or mellow; husky or well-toned. What if it sounded bad and he didn't like the way I say his name? Even when she was scared, her lips parted slightly when she tried to spell out the sounds to his name inaudibly. He waited patiently until his head turned sharply to the side and she followed his gaze to find Mikheil at the door. Her guardian was enthusiastic as ever but the liveliness quickly faded when he gaze narrowed towards them and Willow finally realised how close she had leaned into Arell.
Mikheil frowned, folding his arms in front of his chest. His lips moved a little too fast for her to read whatever he was trying to say. Judging by his body language, she only assumed that he had to be talking in an agitated tone again. Arell was giving him a funny smile, chuckling occasionally and she grew curious about their conversation when their emotions were incongruous. Willow reached for Arell's arm and tugged on it slightly to grab his attention. He turned and smiled at her gently while ruffling the top of her head with his palm, showering her with his usual tenderness.
Her face heated at the gesture and it reminded her of a few days ago when he wanted to learn how to tell someone that they're adorable in sign language. There were different ways and for one of it, Willow explained to him that from a man to a woman it is to ruffle the top of her head gently. Since then, he had been doing that to her way too often. Even now and moreover, in front of Mikheil.
After a few exchanges, the two men later went out of her house and Mikheil told her that he was bringing Arell to his house for a while. Willow became confused about everything that was happening. Looking out of the window, towards the direction of Mikheil's house, she only wondered what they had to talk about without her involvement.
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Arell returned to the house later at night and she caught him at first sight when he entered through the door because she had been staring at that direction for quite a long time. She saw that he was looking at her and she gestured to him: Would you like something to eat?
"I ate with Mikheil," he said, then turning towards the table at the dining area before looking at her again. He looked remorseful when he mentioned, "Did you wait for me?"
Willow shook her head but the truth was that she had waited for him. When she was left alone in the house, an unease within her refused to settle. She began to notice that without him in her space, the house suddenly felt too huge and even when she was well acquainted with silence, she never knew that there was a weight to it that could press so forcefully against her chest. She left him with a small smile before turning around to settle back into her usual armchair by the fireplace. Willow picked up the knitting needles but her fingers refused to move. Her heart was aching out of all the reasons.
She felt his presence close and he lowered himself in front of her. Those brilliant bright eyes focused so intensely on her that she panicked at the awareness that she had nowhere to hide. Seemingly worried, he asked, "Is something wrong?"
Willow knew that he couldn't stay with her forever and neither could she brazenly ask to stay with him. Too small. Her diminutive presence was almost nonexistent within his sphere. Rolling her lower lip between her teeth, she bit hard on it and allowed the pain of it to remind her of the reality of everything. She refused to look at him as she stepped away from the fireplace and went ahead to lock herself in the greenhouse.
Willow led a simple, happy life till now. Yet, the encounter with him had intruded her space so overwhelmingly, making her wish that if she had been something far greater, she would perhaps be able to at least belong in some part of his astounding world.
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Since that night, Willow closed herself in the greenhouse and avoided him whenever she could. She knew that it wasn't right for her to treat him so unfairly when he had been nothing but kind and patient towards her. Yet, distancing herself from him was the only way she could feel less desperate to try to attach herself to him. When he was leaving to return to the Royal Grounds in a few days time, she wanted to send him off with a bright smile rather than an aching heart with tears in her eyes.
Willow sat alone with her plants, her hands wrapped around one of the ceramic pots. It was hard to ignore the noise that came with her thoughts but her surroundings were filled with vacuumed silence, like always.
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The day when he had everything all packed up and ready to leave, Willow stood beside Mikheil as he pulled Arell into a hug. Then, she felt a tap on her arm and she glanced up. His height easily towered over her and she had to tip her head back to face him. An expression of confusion was apparent on his face and he looked unsure when he waited for her to gesture something to him. She felt remorseful because she knew that it was because she had intentionally avoided him till today. Pulling a smile, she only hoped that it didn't look too forced for him to realise. Willow raised her hand and waved at him before she turned and walked back into the house. Arell didn't stop her and neither did she look back to witness his leaving silhouette.
Closing the door behind her, she dropped herself into the couch by the fireplace and tucked her legs close to her chest. Beside her, it was a neatly placed pile of wool threads and the nicely folded lengthy muffler that she knitted. Tears began to fall when she missed him and all the light he had brought into her life.
Feeling a presence close, she quickly turned around but disappointment pulled painfully at the bottom of her heart when it was Mikheil. She looked towards the opened door behind him and it was empty. It was an excruciating reminder that just like her parents, Arell wasn't going to come back to her ever again. A whimper escaped from her trembling lips and she didn't even care if she was crying out audibly. Her gaze remained at the empty doorway and she never knew that she would once again wait for someone who would never return.
Mikheil placed a hand on her shoulder and handed her a letter while gesturing for her to read. She hastily wiped the tears and contained her emotions again, trying her best not to think of everything that was upsetting her. Willow unfolded the paper and her eyes followed through the lines of words written in the most beautiful handwriting she ever saw.
Following what he said, Willow placed a hand over the left corner of her chest and for the first time in her life, she felt a reverberation of sound — a sound of something that was beyond her to feel. A steady beat that was felt from her chest and she wondered if that was how things were supposed to be heard, from the heart.
Turning towards Mikheil, he smiled kindly and gestured to her: Willow, your world is so much bigger than you believed it to be.
When she kept her gaze on her guardian, he only nodded and gestured towards the door. Willow pushed herself up and folded her hands around Mikheil's neck, hugging him tightly before she grabbed whatever coat she had on the hanger and ran out of her house and headed towards the direction of the shallow woods. She saw him standing there with his back facing her and gathering all the courage she could find in her, she shouted, "Arell!"
He turned and smiled ever so affectionately at her. Stretching his arm out and presenting her with an open palm, she saw his lips moving as he said her name, "Willow."
At that moment, she remembered the last thing her parents ever told her about love.
Willow, when you encountered the person you love, you'll hear his voice in your heart. It would be loud with clarity and you'll know it, darling.
That's the sound of love.
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End of the Amberstone Trilogy
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