Kabanata 20
WALA nang pag-asa si Papa. He didn't wake up faster enough when I gave birth, sinampal na siya ni Mama sa panic niya, lahat-lahat pero wala pa rin kaya ang ending, ang Kuya Macky ang bumuhat sa akin at dinala ako sa kotse papuntang ospital.
That was the longest six hours of my life, anim na oras akong nag-labor sa anak ko at sobrang sakit pala. Para akong kinakatay doon sa loob pero worth it naman lahat ng hirap at mga luha nang masilayan ko na ang anak ko.
I felt like I was the luckiest woman on earth the moment the doctor put him on my chest. I was shaking and crying when I heard his cries and almost broke down when his tiny hand gripped my finger touching him.
Sa pagod din siguro ay nakatulog ako habang nasa dibdib ko ang aking anak.
I woke up after a couple of hours in a room. Pagmulat ko pa lang ng mga mata ay kaagad kong nakita si Mama na nakaupo sa tabi ko, si Dette ay nasa kandungan niya na unang nakakita sa akin.
"Ate!" she exclaimed.
Mabilis na napatingin sa akin si Mama at lumaki ang ngiti. "Daru..." she called, ibinaba niya si Dette sa upuan bago ako inalalayan patayo.
"Ma..." I called her. Inalalayan niya akong paupo sa kama, kaagad na napahawak ako sa medyo impis ko ng tiyan pabalik sa kanya.
"M-my baby?" I asked softly and she smiled at me.
"The nurse will bring him here, princess. He's a cute, handsome boy, baby." She smiled and kissed my cheek.
I slowly nodded, napabaling ako sa sofa at napakurap-kurap nang makita si Papa na nakaupo sa sofa pero nakatulala lang sa akin.
"P-pa?" I called and that made him jump.
Mabilis siyang napasulyap sa akin at napatayo sa sofa.
"Darshana..." he called and stood abruptly, napangiti ako nang yakapin ako ni Papa kaya inangat ko ang kamay ko at hinaplos ang kanyang likod.
"Papa,"
"How are you? D-does it hurt, princess?" he asked, napangiti na ako nang lumayo si Papa at tinitigan ang mukha ko. "I'm so sorry, I blacked out last night, I just didn't expect—shit, I fucking fainted!"
Natawa ako, narinig ko ang hagikhik ni Dette at Mama sa tabi ko kaya napailing ako kay Papa at tinapik ang pisngi niya.
"It's okay, Papa. Masakit but the moment I saw my baby, it all faded away. Isa pa, Kuya brought us here," I said and stopped when I realized something.
I immediately roamed my eyes and saw Kuya near the couch, nakatayo rin at mukhang gustong lumapit pero nagdadalawang-isip. On the sofa, I saw his wife, bumaling ang tingin ko sa dalawang bata at hindi pa rin talaga ako makapaniwala sa nakikita.
"Kuya..." I called.
My brother froze, he was hesitating at first but he walked closer to my bed. Narinig ko ang tikhim ni Papa kaya nagtaka ako.
"Are you okay now?" Kuya asked, humalik siya sa noo ko at yumakap at mabilis ko siyang niyakap pabalik.
Nagtatanong ang mga mata na napasulyap ako kay Mama habang yakap si Kuya at ngumuso lang siya at bahagyang umiling. It was as if she's telling me na hindi ayos ang Kuya at Papa.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I reassured bago humiwalay sa kanya, sumulyap ako saglit kay Papa na seryoso sa gilid ko pabalik kay Kuya na napalunok pa nang makita ang tingin ko sa pamilya niya.
"Let me..." He cleared his throat again. "Let me introduce them again. Storm, come here." He called his wife.
I saw her smile, marahang lumapit siya sa amin, nakakapit sa kanyang kamay ang dalawang mga bata. The girl looked so bubbly to me but she looks so shy, nakatitig siya sa akin pero nahihiya kaya nagbababa ng tingin.
Meanwhile, the boy got my brother's blue eyes, sa dalawang magkapatid ay mas hawig ni Kuya ang batang lalaki, para silang pinagbiyak na bunga, lalo na noong bata pa ang Kuya.
He looked shy too, seryoso ang kanyang mga mukha at nakatungo lang habang papalapit silang tatlo.
Nakita ko ang pag-gilid ni Mama, walang imik na iniupo niya sa Dette sa tabi ko sa kama at pinagmasdan ang mga lumapit sa amin.
Kuya glanced at the beautiful woman and introduce her to us again. "This is Storm Romana, my wife."
"Nice meeting you all." She smiled at us. "Mama, Papa, Dette...Daru." She glanced at me.
I flashed a small smile and nodded, still shocked. Si Mama ay tahimik lang na nakikinig at si Papa ay napansin kong nakatitig na naman sa mga bata, tahimik pa rin.
"These are my kids," Kuya said, marahang inabot niya ang batang babae at binuhat. "Baby, I want you to meet again your Tita Daru." He said sweetly to the girl, I noticed the resemblance of their eye shape and face.
The girl's beautiful black, round eyes stared at me as if she wanted to talk but hesitating and shy kaya ngumiti na ako.
"Hi, baby girl, I'm Tita Daru, you are?" I asked softly and held my hand to her.
Her eyes brightened. Her tiny hand reached my palm.
"Sunny po." She flashed a cute smile. "Like the sun po a-and two po ako!" she showed me her fingers.
My heart melted. "Hi, Sunny. What a cute name. Is that your real name, baby?"
"Sunshine Forrest po..." she said in a small voice kaya napasulyap na ako kay Kuya at nakita ang ngiti niya habang nakamasid sa bata.
"Nice meeting you, baby Sunny. You are so pretty, baby." I greeted, still shocked that Kuya Macky has a family without us knowing. Bumaba ang tingin ko sa batang lalaki.
His blue eyes widened when he saw me looking, mabilis siyang nagbaba ng tingin at nagtago sa likod ni Kuya Macky kaya napangiti ako.
"Hi, little boy, I'm Tita Daru. Can I know your name?" I asked softly.
Umiling siya at nagtago ulit sa likod ni Kuya, narinig ko ang tawa ni Mama kaya nilingon ko siya at nakitang sinisilip niya ang batang lalaki sa likod ni Kuya.
"Uhm, pasensya na. He's kinda aloof of people, medyo suplado rin kaya..." The lady chuckled a bit and tried reaching the boy out.
"Baby—" she called but the boy moved away.
"Ayaw!" he said, suplado nga kaya nakagat ko ang labi.
I glanced at Papa and saw his brows are furrowed, hiding a smirk pero nang makita ang tingin ko ay bumusangot ulit kaya napangiti na ako at bumaling kay Kuya na dinudungaw ang bata sa likod niya.
"Son," he called. "Come on, Tita Daru has macaroons, 'di ba, Tita?" baling sa akin ni Kuya.
Nagtaka ako. Ngumuso si Kuya at tila may sinasabi ang mga mata kaya napatikhim ako.
"Oh, yes, yes... I have macaroons," I said. "Maraming-marami na box! Kapag nagpakilala sa akin ang baby gwapo na 'yan, bibigay ko mga macaroons."
It was effective, mayamaya pa ay nakadungaw na sa gilid ni Kuya ang baby boy habang nakatingin sa akin kaya ngumiti ako.
"You like macaroons?" I asked.
"H-how many box po?" his small voice asked adorably kaya ngumiti ako.
"Hmm..." Napahawak ako sa baba ko. "I have ten. You like?"
He immediately nodded at me, mukhang suplado pa rin pero nagliliwanag na ang mga mata.
"Sit here, Sunny," Kuya called and placed Sunny beside Dette in the bed. I saw Sunny smiled shyly at her and blinked.
"H-hi po, Tita." She smiled at Dette.
"You like to play Barbies?" Dette asked and Sunny quickly nodded at her kaya napangiti na ako.
Kuya carefully carried the boy in his arms and the moment their faces were aligned I immediately noticed the resemblance.
No doubt that they're one of ours.
"Say hi," Kuya said softly and the boy, despite his cold aura looks so adorable and shy.
"H-hi po..." he said, I saw him glance at Papa beside me. "H-hi po, Lolo."
Napaubo si Papa roon, napatawa si Mama sa gilid at humagikhik si Dette.
"Papa," I called my father na parang nabibilaukan na kaya natawa na ako.
Mukhang hindi pa rin niya napa-process na Lolo na siya ng tatlo sa isang gabi lang.
"Just call your Lolo Daddylo na lang, baby boy," sabi ko. "And this is Mommyla and Tita Dette."
The little boy nodded.
"O-okay po, sorry po. B-bawas po ba macaroons?"
It made me laugh, nakita ko ang pag-ngisi ni Kuya roon at pag-iling ni Storm. Pati si Mama at Papa'y natatawa.
"Oh, of course not. Tita Daru would still give you boxes of macaroons kung... sasabihin mo sa akin ang name mo?"
I offered my hand at he blinked before reaching out for it.
"S-Skyler po." He muttered.
"Opo, like Skyler the sky po! Langit po!" biglang baling ni Sunny na tinuro pa ang kisame kaya napabungisngis ako at inabot siya.
"Wow, what a cute name. Bagay na bagay. Is that your whole name, baby?"
Hindi sumagot ang batang lalaki at nahuli ko siyang nakikipagtitigan kay Papa kaya si Kuya Macky na ang sumagot.
"Skyler Forrest," Kuya said at napatango na ako.
"Sunny and Sky?" I was amazed. "Wow, you are really sunshines, babies."
Biglang may kumatok, sabay-sabay kaming napalingon at kaagad na tumalon ang puso ko nang makita ang nakadungaw na Nurse sa amin.
"Good morning po, pasensya na sa istorbo," she said. "Nandito na po si Baby Sandejas."
My heart jumped.
Nangilid na ang luha ko. Kuya lowered Skyler down to the ground again before carrying Sunny from the bed para gumilid. Si Mama ay kinuha rin si Dette at si Papa ay nasa tabi ko at nakaabang din.
My hand shook when I saw the Nurse slowly took him in a carrier. Umawang ang labi ko roon nang makitang anak ko ang nasa loob.
"He's a healthy baby boy po." She smiled. "Congratulations po, Miss Sandejas."
My tears fell when the Nurse carefully took my child from it. She moved closer to me. nanginig na ako at binalot ng saya ang puso nang marahang inilagay niya sa braso ko ang anak ko.
The moment I saw a glimpse of his tiny face closely, I fell in love all over again. I felt so warm I'd combust in glee. Napasinghot ako at sa nangingilid na luha'y inangat ko ang daliri at inilapit sa palad niya.
His tiny palm gripped it so tight he'd began mending the broken pieces of me without even knowing.
"B-baby ko..." I called and cried.
The Nurse excused herself. Si Mama at Dette na dinudungaw ang baby ko, may mga ngiti sa labi. Ang mga pamangkin na tahimik na nakamasid, Sunny looks so excited having a look at her cousin kaya ngumiti ako sa kabila ng luha.
"Come on, Sunny, Sky, meet your cousin," I said and they immediately ran towards me. Their eyes brightened when they saw my baby's adorable and handsome face.
"What's his name po, Tita?" the bubbly Sunny asked kaya ngumiti ako.
"Cole Kiesian..." Saying his name made me happy. I heard my baby boy coo, mas humigpit ang hawak niya sa daliri ko kaya mas napaluha ako.
"B-baby, these are your cousins, Sunny and Sky," I introduced.
"Hi, baby Cole!" Sunny cheered. "I'm Sunny like the sun and Skyler like the sky!"
Mas napaluha ako pero biglang umatras nang narinig ko ang pagsinghot ni Papa. Mabilis akong napabaling. My lips parted when I saw Papa crying, hinahawi niya ang luha niya kaya suminghap ako.
"P-pa..."
"F-fuck," suminghot siya. "M-may apo na akong tatlo, m-matanda na ako..." he cried out loud kaya bigla kaming napatawa, si Mama ay napailing pero lumapit kay Papa para yakapin ang huli.
"Wala ka pa namang puting buhok, okay lang 'yan." Mama comforted him pero that made him cry more.
"A-ayaw ko magka-uban!" he hissed kaya napatawa na kaming lalo sa kwarto.
Life has ways to balance itself, really. Kung may mawawala ay may papalit, nawala man ang Papa Jer sa amin ay tatlong buhay ang nadagdag.
A year later after Papa Jer died, Mama Lena followed him in heaven and like him, she just didn't wake up one morning.
Malungkot kami pero masaya na napasaya namin ang Mama Lena sa mga huling araw niya kasama kami. From time to time, kapag may free time ay palagi kaming nag-i-sleep over na magpipinsan sa ancestral house.
Mama Lena even saw my baby and Kuya Macky's before she was taken from us. Tama nga ang sabi niya na may mga bagay talaga na hindi nagtatagal, kagaya na roon ang buhay. Tanging pagmamahal ang naiiwan sa mga nawawala.
Mama Lena and Papa Jer, before they even left taught us unforgettable lessons and marked reminders in our hearts. They taught us to love each other and never leaving one another.
Na we aren't perfect. No one is. Na may mga pagkakamali ang bawat-isa na hindi maiintindihan ng lahat kaya importanteng laliman ang pag-unawa't pag-usapan para magkaintindihan kaysa sa talikuran at basta na lang iwan.
The past year has been tough for everyone in the family, it felt like it was our downfall. Hindi lang ang pamilya namin. Ang mga pinsan ay mayro'n ding hinarap na mga hindi inaasahang sitwasyon. Nagkagulo ang pamilya, nawalan kami ng mga mahal sa buhay pero kapag may pagmamahal talaga sa isang tahanan, mabigat man ang problema'y gumagaan kapag may suporta ng isa't-isa.
Kaya mahirap talaga ang mag-pamilya, mahirap magpalaki ng anak, mahirap kumita para may maipakain ka sa kanila. Hindi lang basta-basta. It was important to consider your capability and readiness as a parent.
Are you ready physically? Financially and mentally?
Nakakapagod pero all the exhaustion will melt away kapag nakita mo silang masaya sa uuwian mo.
"Cookie! Come here, baby!" I called my son and chuckled.
My one-and-a-half-year-old son, Cole Kiesian, or what we call him, Cookie went out of the door, bubbly jumping up and down when he saw me.
"Ma Daru!" he cheered happily, muntik pa nga siyang matumba pero mabilis ko siyang naabot at binuhat.
"Careful, baby. Baka madapa ka, do you want your handsome face to have scratches?" I asked softly.
"No!" he shook his head at me. "Pogi, Cookie!"
Napahalakhak ako at pinatakan ang kanyang pisngi ng halik.
"Yes, pogi ang baby Cookie ko, right?" Sinundot ko ang kanyang baywang kaya humagikhik siya at yumakap sa leeg ko.
"Ti...tickles, Ma!"
"Oh, nakikiliti ang baby kong liit?" I chuckled and he shifted his gaze at me, his blue eyes sparkled and his dimples deepened when he smiled.
"Ma, cookie?" he asked cutely.
"Hmm?"
"Want cookie ni Cookie!" Napatawa siya nang matantong kapareho ng nickname niya ang gusto niyang kainin. Napangisi ako at tumango.
My son is very smart. He was eloquent. At his young age, he's a very creative kid. He talks a lot too kahit nahihirapan pa siyang buohin ang mga salita minsan at bulol.
"Sure, we'll eat cookies later, baby, okay?" I smiled. "Nasaan muna ang mga pinsan mo?"
Bigla kong narinig ang tawanan at tilian, nanlaki ang mata ko at napatawa nang makita si Papa na tumatakbo palabas ng kwarto, nasa balikat niya si Sunny habang hinahabol sila ni Dette at Skyler.
"Mama Daru!" Sunny screamed when she saw me, waving her hand. "Run po tayo! Run!" she screamed.
"Run! Ma!" Tinapik na ako ni Cookie na halos tumalon na sa braso ko kaya humagalpak na ako at inayos ang buhat sa kanya.
"Darshana, run!" Hinihingal na sabi ni Papa sa kakahabol no'ng dalawa kaya sabay kaming sumigaw ni Cookie at nagtatakbo papunta sa living room ng bahay.
"Jusko, mga bata kayo!" Natigilan lang kami sa harutan nang lumitaw si Mama na may hawak na sandok.
"Mommyla, run po kami!" Sunny giggled.
"I know, baby pero may party tayo, 'di ba?" Mama said softly.
Sabay-sabay na bumagsak ang balikat naming lahat.
"Babe, ten minutes pa—"
"Bata ka ba, Dash Rakiel?" Mama snapped kaya bumusangot ni Papa roon.
"Saglit lang—"
"Ang sabi ko, tawagan mo na ang mga kapatid mo para makapunta na rito tapos aabutan kitang nakikipaghabulan sa mga bata?" Mama asked.
I smirked and spoke.
"He forgot it, Ma. Ako na tumawag kanina, papunta na raw."
Papa slowly carried Sunny na nasa may likod niya at binuhat ng maayos.
"Sorry, babe." Papa sighed. "Ang mga apo ko kasi ang kukulit and Daddylo couldn't resist them, right?" He kissed Sunny kaya bumungisngis ito.
"Sige, it's alright." Napailing na si Mama. "Basta mag-ayos na kayong lahat, okay? Dette, ikaw, birthday na birthday mo nagtatakbo ka riyan."
"Sorry, Ma." Tawa ni Dette at inayos ang buhok niya.
"Okay, mag-ayos ka na at dadating na ang mga pinsan mo. Wear your dress, okay? Darshana, ikaw na ang bahala." I smiled and nodded, binaba ni Papa si Sunny kaya hinawakan nito ang kamay ng kambal palapit sa akin.
Dette walked closer too at si Cookie ay pilit na gustong bumaba kaya pinagbigyan ko.
"Hawakan n'yo si baby cookie, hmm?" I reminded the twins at nang hawakan nila ang anak ko ay napangiti ako ng malambing.
Papa walked closer to my mother, he hugged her, trying to kiss her pero ngumiwi lang si Mama roon.
"Pawis na pawis ka, Dash Rakiel!" she scolded.
"Luh..." Papa laughed. "Akala mo siya hindi pawis na pawis kapag nasa ibabaw—"
"Hoy!" she gasped, covered his mouth kaya nanlaki ang mata ko roon. Napasulyap sa akin si Mama, mukhang naeeskandalo sa bibig ng Papa ko kaya napatikhim na lang ako bumaling sa mga bata.
"Sino gusto pumunta sa room ni Mama Daru?" I asked and the kids immediately raised their hands, natawa ako nang nakatitig lang sa akin si Skyler at si Sunny pa ang nagtaas ng kamay niya.
"Macaroons?" I said the magic word. That's when his eyes widened and lifted his hand now.
"I want!" he cheered.
"C-cookies for Cookie!" my son cheered too kaya natawa na ako roon.
Today is Dette's sixth birthday, nasa bahay ang simpleng salo-salo kaya abala ang lahat, Kuya Macky took the cake na pinagawa namin sa isang cake shop kaya nasa akin ang mga bata ngayon.
It was tiring, I admit, eleven na ako ng gabi nakauwi kahapon pagkatapos ng flight ko at ngayong umaga ay ako ang nag-aasikaso sa mga bata dahil ayaw nilang masyadong nasa Yaya at mas gustong makipaglaro sa akin.
It's fine with me, though, masasaya naman silang kasama pero dahil mga maliliit pa ay magugulo kaya nakakapagod talaga minsan. S'werte ko rin nang dumating ang mga pinsan ko para tumulong, Scira and the very pregnant Zirena came to me and help me with the kids.
"Nasaan ba kasi si Storm?" ani Scira na kalong-kalong si Sunny at inaayos ang buhok nito. I saw Zire playing with Cookie while she's giving him gummy bears at si Skyler naman ay nasa sofa, nakaupo lang at tahimik na sumusubok magbasa sa story book nila.
I shrugged, sumulyap ako sa salamin para tignan ang ayos na p'wede kay Dette para ngayon sa birthday niya.
"You know..." pasimple kong sabi at bumaling sa mga bata bago umiling.
"Wala?" Zire then mouthed silently kaya tumango ako.
"Ano pa bang bago?" I said. "My brother's anxious too, pati ang mga bata."
"Was she here yesterday?" Scira asked at tumango ako.
"Hinatid ang mga bata tapos sabi ni Kuya wala na naman sa bahay nila," I sighed. "It's crazy, I don't know what's happening. Ang mahalaga sa akin sa ngayon ay safe ang mga pamangkin ko at nandito sila."
We helped each other in dressing up Dette, nakangiti siya habang nilalagyan ko ng manipis na gloss ang labi niya.
"Ate, pretty ba?" she asked kaya natawa ako at tumango.
"Yes, birthday girl, you are so pretty." Inayos ko ang kulot sa buhok niya.
"Sino mas pretty, ako o si Queen?" she asked me kaya halos mabulunan ako ng laway ko. Humagalpak si Zire sa gilid, tinulak si Scira na nailing din at nangisi.
"That's what Queen exactly asked me earlier too," Scira said and walked closer to us.
"Talaga?" Napatawa na ako.
"Yeah, I was fixing her hair and she's like, Ate, who's more pretty? Me or Dette?" she said in a small voice, imitating Queen kaya tawang-tawa kaming magpipinsan.
"Oh, you are both pretty, Dette," ani Zire. "You have the innocent type face like Tita Reah while Queen has that Tita Zid's maldita aura pero nonetheless, pretty kayo pareho."
Audette glanced at me, asking for answers.
"No need to compare. Yeah, you're both pretty—"
"No, dapat one lang," she insisted, crossing her arms on her chest kaya napabaling ako sa mga pinsan. Nakita kong pigil ang ngiti ni Zire, si Scira ay pasimpleng umiinom ng tubig kaya pasimple ko siyang sinipa bago ngumiti sa kapatid ko.
"S'yempre si Dette kasi hawig tayo, eh. Mga pretty girls," patol ko na lang sa birthday girl at narinig kong nabulunan si Scira doon ng iniinom at pumapalakpak si Zire, tawang-tawa.
"Tama iyan, walang pangit sa pamilyang 'to! Visual family tayo rito! Right, kids?" humalakhak pa siya habang nakikipag-apir sa mga batang nauto kaya suminghap na ako.
"Dahan-dahan ang tawa, baka lumabas 'yang ulo ng anak mo!" I hissed at her.
Kasa-kasama ko si Dette pagkababa namin sa hagdan. She's wearing a wonderful pink, dress. Her hair is in curls, naka-heels din ang kapatid ko kaya parang dalaga na talaga ang datingan.
My son, Cookie was with Kuya Macky. Buhat niya ito habang nasa tabi niya ang dalawang pamangkin ko.
"Sinong may birthday? Si Dette-Dette o si Daru? Pagandahan sila, oh!" ani Tito Zeijan noong pababa kami kaya natawa ako.
"Kaway ng pang-Miss Universe!" ani Tita Zidney kaya nakisakay ako at kumaway-kaway doon at mabilis na gumaya si Dette.
The whole family is complete, may mga batang nag-iikot-ikot, ang ibang mga school friend ni Dette ay nandito rin.
Audette Gaia Aceso Sandejas looked so majestic while she's in the middle, hawig na hawig sila ni Mama pero unlike me na nakuha ata ang lahat ng features niya, si Dette ay hati. Her soft features were from our mother pero kay Papa niya nakuha ang tapang sa mga mata niya.
"Wish Ate Clyte's here..." nawala ang atensyon ko sa gitna nang marinig ang mahinang boses ni Scira, I shifted my gaze at her and I sighed, hinawakan ko ang kamay niya at pinisil.
"She will come back, we'll find her, okay?" I smiled at her and she nodded, a positive expression etched on her eyes.
Saglit kong inasikaso ang mga bisita sa mga upuan habang inaayos nila ang cake ni Dette na kinuha ni Kuya. I asked him to check on my son first while I talk to some visitors with Mama, inasikaso namin ang mga bisita ni Dette na mga kaklase niya.
"Hi, Miss, baka may extra kayong upuan? Pahingi sanang dalawa." Isa sa mga Nanay ay nagtanong kaya ngumiti ako at tumango.
"Mayro'n po, sandali." Pumunta ako sa mga upuan, inangat ko ang isa para kunin pero kaagad na natigilan nang may umagaw nito sa akin.
"Let me," I heard a man's voice behind kaya natigilan ako.
I shifted my gaze and saw a man smiling at me.
"Ako na kukuha para hindi ka mahirapan. Ilan ba?"
"Just two." I smiled softly, marahang hinawi ang maikling buhok na dumikit sa leeg. "Thank you."
"Welcome, saan 'to dadalhin?" he asked and I pointed the table where it was needed. Sinundan ko siya nang ihatid niya ang mga bangko roon, pagkatapos ay nilingon niya ako kaya muli akong nagpasalamat.
"Thank you again," I said.
"Welcome, Darshana, right?" he asked kaya bahagyang nanlaki ang mata kong kilala ako at tumango sa kanya.
"Yeah, Dette's my sister,"
"I'm Chase, you're a model, right?" he offered me his hand. "Kapatid ko 'yong kaklase ni Audette, sinamahan ko rito."
"Oh, nice meeting you, Chase," I greeted and accepted his hand.
I talked to him for a while before my family called me dahil iihip na ng kandila si Dette.
She was smiling prettily in the middle, sa kanyang gilid ay naroon ang frenemy niyang si Queen Scira na hindi nagpatalo at nakapangmalakasang dress din at ang ibang kaklase niya. We were standing just on her other side while singing.
"Happy birthday, Audette! Happy birthday! Happy birthday!" we all sang. "Happy birthday to you!"
We clapped our hands.
"Okay, make a wish and blow the candle, princess," Papa Dash said softly and Dette smiled, pumikit siya para magsabi na ng wish niya at nagmulat.
I saw how she opened her mouth to blow the candles but before she even did, inunahan na siya sa pag-ihip ng kandila ni Queen Scira at pagkatapos ay proud pang ngumiti.
My jaw dropped.
"This... is not fucking good." I heard Scira's nervous laugh beside me.
Shit. Shit! Shit!
My eyes widened when Dette cried before she screamed and pulled Queen's hair.
"Shit!" Papa gasped and tried taking Dette away from her.
"Queen Scira!" I heard Tito Thorn called pero huli na at nagsabong na ang dalawa.
Nakawala na si Dette kay Papa at hinila ang buhok muli nito but Queen looks unbothered. She even smiled evilly after that pero nawala iyon nang umiyak si Dette at muli siyang hinila.
"Santisima!" Tita Zidney gasped and we all began panicking.
"T-that's my cake! That's my candle!" Dette screamed pero huli na ang lahat, nagsabunutan na silang dalawa roon sa gitna at sumubsob sa cake kaya halos mabuwal na ang Mama sa stress.
It was a disaster, I mean, really is a disaster. Nakakahiya ang nangyari pero sa huli'y natawa na lang kami, paano ba naman at pagkatapos nilang masubsob sa cake na dalawa ay nagtawanan habang umiiyak at magulo ang buhok at that means...ceasefire.
Naging masaya naman ang mga sumunod na araw, Cookie, Pocholo and I are sometimes staying with Mama and Papa in the mansion pero hindi ganoon kadalas. Kapag may event lang o kaya'y may mahaba-haba akong break ay doon kami, nando'n din minsan sina Sky at Sunny kaya may kalaro si Cookie pero madalas ay nasa bago kong condo kami nag-i-stay.
Four months after I gave birth, bumalik na ako sa trabaho. I was gone for a year that rumors circulated na nabuntis daw ako which is true but I didn't dare to comment and lit the fire they've been burning for months.
Some assumed maybe because it was I was ashamed for the nude painting of me going viral.
Hindi ko rin naman itinatanggi na nabuntis ako, I just chose to stay silent for my privacy. Nirerespeto rin nila iyon sa pamilya namin kaya ang usaping iyon ay sa amin lang pero may tainga ang lupa at may pakpak ang balita at usap-usapan iyon.
Cookie changed my life for the better.
He was a ball of sunshine, he's hope, new beginning, the light I had during my darkest times. His smiles reminded me so much of his father and sometimes, I feel so sad remembering it pero I just got used to it dahil nabuo siya sa pagmamahal ko sa Papa niya.
Busy ako sa trabaho but I always make sure I have enough time to be with my son, kung noon ay ayaw kong pakialaman nina Papa ang schedule ko, pabor na sa akin iyon ngayon.
I look forward for my day off the next day dahil makakasama ko ang baby ko pero mukhang mauudlot dahil sa pakiusap ni Ate Crest nang makita niya ako sa mansion namin at kasama si Cookie.
"Please, Daru?" Ate Crest pouted while offering me the ticket.
"Pahinga ko bukas, Ate." Inarte ko roon. "At saka si Cookie..."
"Sige na, please? Saglit lang naman, kahit half-day lang tapos uwi ka kaagad." She smiled sweetly at me, moving a bit before touching my hand. "Please, Daru? Please?" she pouted.
"Bakit ba ayaw mo pumunta?" I asked.
"We're having a party tomorrow," she muttered and I just stared at her, hindi na nagulat doon.
"Pretty please? Bigay lang 'to sa akin ng isang friend ko at kinuha ko kasi sayang naman at gusto ko sumubok pumunta kaso nga may party... kaya, please?" She looked at me pleadingly and honestly, I wanted to go to chill. Pero kasi ang anak ko.
"Tungkol muna saan ang ang exhibit?" I asked, nanghihinayang na hindi ako makakapag-off bukas dahil sa exhibit na sinasabi niya pero s'yempre, si Ate Crest 'to.
The past years was very tough for her and kahit sa small things, I wanted to be there for her.
"Oh, you'll like it!" She giggled. "Kaya ikaw na lang ang pinagbigyan ko kasi I know you'll like it!".
Mas naging curious ako, kumunot ang noo ko roon at nagtanong.
"Now, I'm curious, tungkol saan?" I asked. She grinned and lifted the ticket.
"Art exhibit." She grinned mischievously and my mouth parted.
Natigilan ako. Nagdadalawang-isip pa ako noong una pero biglang na-excite. Mabilis kong hinablot sa kamay niya ang ticket at ngumuso.
"Ano ba 'yan, Ate! Sana sinabi mo kaagad! Madali akong kausap!" I exclaimed and she laughed and hugged me.
"Thanks, Daru! You're the best!" she exclaimed, showering my face with her kisses.
The next morning, I was so excited. I wore a comfy mini skirt, a red off-shoulder blouse and let my hair fall on my back. I put on a simple and light makeup and wore my heels.
Matagal din ako noong huling nakapunta sa exhibit. The last that I remembered was the date we had in a museum, the times we talked about art.
I was still bitter about it. I wanted so badly to despise art because of it but didn't have the heart to.
Pero siguro, hindi naman tama na mawawala ang pagmamahal ko sa sining dahil lang sinaktan niya ako, right? I shouldn't dwell in the past too much dahil bago pa siya makilala noon, hilig ko na ang sining.
Of course, his memories with me will always linger in places such as that but I shouldn't let that affect me. I shouldn't.
"Ma, alis ikaw?" I smiled softly upon hearing my Cole spoke, binalingan ko siya na nakaupo sa kama ko at naglalaro ng mga truck na laruan.
"Yes, baby ko," I said softly, naglakad patungo sa kanya at naupo sa kama.
"Cookie sama..." aniya sa maliit na boses, I stared at his face and I don't wanna think that much but he resembles his father, a lot. Ang tanging nakuha niya lang sa akin ay ang mga mata ko pero ang hugis ng mukha, ang ngiti at dimples, he got it from his father.
"Mama wants to bring Cookie too pero I can't for now, baby, kasi bawal sa museum ang babies." I said sadly.
I saw how sadness filled his blue eyes, something tugged my chest kaya suminghap ako at hinawakan ang kanyang pisngi, nasasaktang maiiwan ko ang anak.
"Tita Crest asked me to go instead of her, baby, pero promise ko sa 'yo, Mama will be home really quick. I'll just check things out, okay? Tapos bibilhan kitang pasalubong, what do you like?"
"Nom-nom?" he asked.
"Oh, you want Nom-nom? What kind of Nom-nom?" I smiled and caressed his cheek.
"Choc..." Hindi niya mabigkas ng maayos kaya napangiti ako.
"Choco Nom-nom?" I asked. He immediately nodded.
"Yes! Cookie drinks Nom-nom!" he cutely raised his hand kaya hinaplos ko ang buhok niya at hinalikan ang kanyang noo.
"Okay, Nom-nom, and?"
"Iken..." he muttered and stared at me. "Iken-manok..."
I was stunned at that, a memory flashed and heard those words in my head with someone else's voice pero pumikit ako at kinalma ang sarili bago siya titigan.
"Wow, you like chicken-manok now?" I asked and he nodded at me and smiled. "Wavyu, Mama..."
"I love you too, Cole." I kissed his cheek. "Mama will go first so I can get home to you early, okay?" I hugged him tight.
Nagbilin ako sa kanyang Yaya bago ako umalis ng unit ko. I drove my car to the destination and I am nervous yet excited at the same time.
Excited because makakapunta akong museum ulit pero kinakabahan dahil baka nandito siya pero mukhang impossible rin. Sa dami ng museum sa Pilipinas ay hindi siguro kami magkikita.
Isa pa, I overheard noong birthday ni Dette na napag-usapan ni Kuya Chiel at Ate Crest si Chance na nasa Canada para sa kanyang mga exhibit. Hindi ko sinasadyang mapakinggan, it's an accident.
Pakialam ko ba sa kanya? It's years ago now, hindi ko na siya mahal. I'm over him.
Niloko lang naman niya ako noon kaya hindi niya deserve makilala si Cookie.
Sulit na sulit ang paggala ko ngayon dahil sa lugar na gustong-gusto ko ako makakapunta kaya mas nae-excite ako. It's my first time touring myself again after I had Cookie, kapag kasi off ko ay nasa kanya ang atensyon ko kaya medyo okay din na makakapasyal ako saglit.
The next two hours, I reached my destination and my smile widened. Inayos ko ang camera sa leeg ko at hinawakan ang hand bag ko.
Sa paglabas at paglapit ko sa entrance ay kaagad akong binati. She checked my ticket and after the validation, she let me in.
The place looks elegant, I have no idea who the artists are in the exhibit, wala na akong time mag-research dahil sa sobrang excited ko ngayon na maaga akong nakatulog kagabi at maaga nagising para maghanap ng damit.
I saw a lot of paintings, may mga abstract at simple. Kaagad akong humanga kaya itinaas ko ang camera para kumuha ng litrato. May mga pastel colors na painting, may sobrang dark at madilim din depende sa style ng artist.
"Wow..." I muttered and smiled, feeling happy that I'd been in a place like this again after a long time.
"Uh, hello, excuse me. Mayro'n pa ba sa itaas?" I asked the lady who I came across with.
"Yes. May iba't-ibang international at local artists. Ang main exhibit sa taas."
"Oh..." bumilog ang bibig ko. "Thank you."
"No worries." She chuckled. "Beware lang, medyo maraming babae sa taas."
"Bakit?"
"'Yong gwapong artist nando'n," she said. It made me chuckle.
"Maybe some came here for the face?"
"Well, yes." She laughed. "But his works are outstanding, he was awarded in different countries, bagay na bagay ang mukha sa art. Parang hinulma rin."
Hmm...
"Well, I'm curious now," I commented. "Sige, Miss. Bye, salamat."
Umakyat ako sa ikalawang palapag at nagitla nang medyo maraming tao nga, umayos ako ng tayo at nakisiksik para makapasok. After a few moments of pushing myself inside the room, I successfully got inside.
I smiled and was immediately amazed when I saw the displays inside.
Totoo nga! Mas nakuha ang pansin ko kaysa roon sa ibaba!
Medyo nagkakagulo ang iilang tao sa isang parte, parang may pinipilahan kaya nag-ikot-ikot na lang ako.
My heart feels light, lalo na nang mahuli ng tingin ko ang pinakamalaking painting sa gitna.
It was a painting of a mother and her child, nakayakap ang ina sa anak pero ang kalahating parte ng katawan ng ina ay nababalot ng dilim. It was as if the darkness is eating her out but on the other side, kung nasaan ang anak ay may liwanag na tila inaagaw siya sa dilim.
I felt emotional while looking at that, I don't know why but I suddenly remembered the hardships I experienced while I was pregnant and gave birth to Cookie.
Totoo ngang ang kalahati ng katawan ng isang ina ay nasa hukay kapag manganganak. It was very painful but it was the kind of pain I wouldn't regret experiencing. Cole Kiesian is worth it, after all the pain, heartbreaks and stress. My Cookie became God's gift for me.
Inangat ko ang camera para kuhaan ng litrato ang painting.
"Excuse, mamaya na po ulit ang picture." My eyes moved from the painting to the stage area and saw a young woman, probably the host of the event.
"Excuse me, let our artist rest first." The lady smiled, may binulong sa nakaupong lalaki na pinipilahan.
He's amazing, really...
Sino kaya 'to? I wanna know his name so I can check out his outer paintings.
Inantay ko ang pagtayo ng lalaki. I was gripping my camera and waiting until I saw his face the same time our gazes locked.
My heart thumped–no, it was throbbing hard I think it's jump out of my chest.
He was still smiling with him dimples showing until he realized I was there. It faded.
Ang multong ngiti ko ay napawi. Umiikot na ang sikmura ko.
Nakita ko ang bahagyang pag-awang ng labi niya at ang pagpuno ng kung anong reaksyon sa kanyang mga mata.
I screamed inside my head, scolding myself for accepting the invite and coming here. I hated that I am seeing him again.
Sumikip ang pakiramdam ko kaya nag-iwas ako.
No, not again. Not another chance with you.
Without thinking twice, I turned my back on him. Mabilis akong naglakad paalis nang may malakas na boses na narinig.
"I really, really love you, Darshana Astrea Sandejas!" he exclaimed at the top of my lungs and I froze.
What... the hell?
Suminghap ako at kumuyom ang kamay, nag-iinit ang mukha. Muli akong naglakad paalis nang marinig siya.
"Kapag hindi ka tumingin gusto mo rin ako! Sige!" hamon niya.
I stopped, remembering this scene resembling what I did way back in high school and it's making me damn sick.
The hell, Salcedo?!
"O-oh, you're walking away! You still love me, aren't you?!" he called and my forehead creased at naglakad pang mas mabilis, walang pakialam na pinagtitinginan na kami.
Shit! The fuck is this man even thinking?!
"My baby doll still loves me, huh?" he said arrogantly. "One more step away from me and I'll marry you right now!"
My eyes widened, nawala ang composure ko at mabilis siyang nilingon.
I met his brown eyes and I saw how proud he was screaming like an idiot.
"What..." I sighed in embarrassment. "What do you want?"
"You." Walang preno niyang sabi at narinig ko ang singhapan sa gilid, binasa ko ang labi ko at sinuklay ang maikling buhok ko at tumitig sa kanya.
"Leave me alone," I scoffed.
"I said I love you." Matapang niyang sabi. "And I get what I want..."
Parang sasabog ang utak ko sa positive thinking niya. I could still remember how aggressive I was when I was a teen and now, seeing Chance doing it irritates me!
Feeling bagets!
Fuck, ganito ba ako no'ng bata ako?!
"Uh-huh?" I laughed. "You like me, huh? I'm younger than you."
"So what?" laban niya kaya inayos ko ang dress at lumapit sa kanya.
Parang alon na nahawi ang mga tao habang naglalakad ako palapit kay Chance. It made him confuse and surprised but he hid it with a cool smirk.
I admit he still looked so damn handsome like years ago but he's... he's ugly. Really. Ang pangit talaga.
His familiar manly scent assaulted my senses. Sinakal ko at sinaksak ang mga malalanding cells kong para na-miss iyon.
He might have seen the way I lost my composure and swallowed dahil mas lumubog ang dimples niya sa ngiting nang-aasar.
I cleared my throat and eyed him. Without a word, I grabbed his polo shirt and pulled him close to me until my mouth was on his ear.
"Sorry pero..." I whispered sensually in his ear. "Hindi ako pumapatol sa senior citizen, Sir." I mocked him.