***
Holly's POV
***
"It's not me!" I screech, banging my desk with my fists. "It was Harry! I saw him vent!"
"Hmmm," Josh murmurs. "I think I can smell a self-report here"
"That's enough for me!" all the boys laugh.
I groan when I hear the clicking of mouses and the votes around me. I click on Harry's name and almost yell when I see the results.
"Holly's been sus this whole round, yanno," Harry says as I get ejected.
"Nah, nah, nah, now I think it's harry," Vik laughs. "Sounds like something an imposter would say"
"Fuck off, Vik!" Harry screams. "You're the sus one!"
I roll my eyes and mute myself as the third round starts. I finish my tasks, follow around Harry and Josh who are the imposters and watch as Vik gets killed. This should be an easy dub surely.
"It's Simon," Harry blurts, unmuting himself as Vik's body gets reported. "He's sus"
"I'll back that," JJ replies. "I think I saw him in electrical with Vik and I think he also vented into medbay"
"Fam! Are you mad?" Simon protests. "As if! I was in upper engine!"
"That's enough for me!" Everyone shouts, voting him off.
"Join the club, Simon," I sigh, shaking my head at the
I go on my phone as the last round starts. Posts and stories about the elections in America flood my phone and I sigh. I'm getting anxious and I don't even live there. If I could, I'd have voted Biden. I hope everyone did their part and voted.
I shut my phone off as the imposters win the victory. I roll my eyes once more as I unmute.
"Absolute zero IQ," I say, laughing. "Vik susses Harry and the next round he's dead? Nice play, lads"
"Ayo, shut up!" JJ laughs. "We're under pressure here"
***
After many games, everyone has their video footage and we say goodbye. I yawn and look at my phone. It's past two am.
I decide to go to bed now but look at the photograph of my criminal father beforehand. It's become a nightly routine. I have to look at his picture.
I place the photograph back in my top desk drawer, along with my adoption documents and turn my PC off. I take my headset off, place it on my PC and turn the lamp by my desk off.
I get into bed and scroll through TikTok for a bit before really shutting my eyes.
***
The next morning JJ makes Simon and I breakfast and we decide to film a 'who knows me better?' video. Daughter vs Best friend edition.
Today feels like a productive day, so I decide to stream for a few hours tonight. I tweet it out and instantly get messages that make me smile. I'm so happy Talia got me into streaming. I'm really enjoying it.
"We'll probably film around five," JJ says, finishing his last bite of bacon and standing up with his plate. "I have so many questions so I'll have Mo pick them out. Do you need anything edited, Holly?"
I shake my head no.
"Oooh, she's pulling a Harry!" Simon laughs, referring to my channel.
"Oh, shut up!" I protest, unable to hide my smile. "I will post. I'm just busy at the moment"
JJ raises an eyebrow. "Busy watching TikTok's and replying to every single comment on your Instagram"
"I love my supporters!" I argue. "Oi, why am I getting bullied?"
The boys laugh and I shake my head. This isn't fair.
"Aww, we're joking," Simon laughs, hugging me from behind. "We love you"
"Piss off," I say dismissively.
The boys laugh once again and disperse into their rooms. I pick up my plate and wash it before drying and putting the cutlery in the correct cupboards and drawers. I then settle on the living room sofa to watch Sidemen Among us videos and reply to more Instagram comments. I watch a few edits and repost them on my story too. Damn, my supporters are talented.
***
After a few more hours, the boys decide to film earlier so we do.
***
"What is my favourite drink?" JJ asks, hiding his phone screen from us so we can't see the answer.
Simon immediately starts writing his answer down on his whiteboard while I continue to struggle.
As Simon finishes, I sigh and write down the generic thing to say.
"Three, two, one, show me your answers" JJ smiles.
I flip my board around and groan when I see Simon's. Strawberry daiquiri. Of course.
"Beer?" JJ says, looking at me with disgust. "What? Fam, you're about to get disowned"
Simon laughs out loud, falling off the sofa and I put on a smile. JJ's joke hurts a little even though I know he didn't mean it. Tears fill my eyes before I can stop them and Simon soon realizes.
JJ turns off the camera and tells Mo to cut the clip out.
"Sweetheart, it was a joke," JJ whispers, holding me close to his chest. "I'm sorry, hun"
"I know," I sniff, smiling and wiping my tears. "I'm being dumb"
"No, angel. If it hurts you, it hurts you. I'm so sorry"
"Sorry for laughing," Simon smiles apologetically. "We love you, Holly"
"I hate you guys," I smile, giving them both hugs.
"Are you okay to keep filming?" Simon asks.
I nod. "Yeah"
***
After filming, JJ, Simon and I decide to go food shopping.
I grab a sidemen hoodie and pull it on as we exit the flat. We take the stairs down and laugh when JJ trips on the last step, almost face planting into the ground.
We make our way to the shops and enter. Simon disperses to get some milk while JJ asks me to get some butter. I take my hoodie off and tie it around my waist now that it's warm inside the supermarket.
I walk down the refrigerator aisle and stop when I get to the right container. I slide the door open and grab a butter tub.
"Excuse me," a deep voice sounds behind me, sounding gruff and grumpy.
"Sorry," I mumble, stepping aside and turning around.
When I lock eyes with the stranger, he suddenly doesn't look like a stranger. His dark, combed-back hair and icy blue eyes connect with mine and I forget how to breathe.
"Just the girl I was looking for"
My biological father stands in front of me, stroking his dark moustache and smirking. He looks me up and down without blinking and I suddenly feel self-conscious in my tight top and gym shorts.
"I-" I try to speak, but my throat feels sandy and dry, my tongue like sandpaper against the roof of my mouth. "I have to go"
I turn to leave and feel my heart almost jump out of my throat when his strong hand latches onto my arm. It's tight and it starts to hurt badly.
"S-stop. L-let me go"
Daniel laughs and it makes me sick.
"You're just like your mother," he breathes, lifting a hand to my face. "So young and protestant. She soon knew her place though"
I flinch as his fingers make contact with my cheek. His hard fingers prod at my jawline as he forcefully lifts my head, examining my face.
"You're pretty too," he says. "Beautiful. In fact, if you weren't my daughter, I'd be doing bad stuff to you"
He laughs once more and I start to shake. I don't feel well.
"So," he sniggers, looking at the empty aisle in front of us. "Where's your new daddy? Surely he wouldn't have let you wander down here all on your little lonesome. Maybe you need a ride home?"
"Not with you, loser," I spit, gaining some confidence.
I'm in a public space. I'll be okay.
Daniel lifts a hand in the air and brings it to a fist, hitting me right in the jaw. I screech in pain, but Daniel mufflers it by sticking a rag in my mouth.
"I've waited years to get you back," he grunts, lifting me with ease. "I'm not losing you again. You're going to pay for what you did"
Dammit, why do I have to be so light? If I was fat, I would never get kidnapped.
"Keep quiet!" he hisses.
"Help!" I yell through the rag, hoping to alert someone. "HELP!"
Daniel runs towards the exit and I burst into tears. This can't be happening. This has got to be my worst nightmare.
I try anything, scratching at his back and kicking my legs and screaming though muffled. I will not go with this man ever again. I've endured his wildest abuse until age eleven. Never again.
We get closer and closer to the exit, people staring at us. I want to cry and scream and ask why no ones helping me.
"I'm her father, it's okay," Daniel says, winking at the ladies in line. They blush.
I scream again in outrage. These women will believe anything.
Daniel makes it outside and now I start to really panic. There's almost no one in the car park and they're all in cars.
"Hey!"
A flicker of hope lights in my stomach and burns up to my throat. A boy around my age sees us and runs towards Daniel.
He's on the phone, holding a piece of paper. By the sounds of it, he's calling the police.
"See what you've done?" Daniel hisses, forcefully putting me on the ground.
He firmly holds me against his van and slaps me hard.
"Bad girls must be punished," Daniel mutters, shoving me into his van. "Wait until we get to my house. You'll love it"
Daniel doesn't get the chance to drive away. The local cop that stands outside the car park runs towards us, gun pointed.
"Shit!" Daniel shouts, hitting the steering wheel.
He opens my door, tosses me out and drives off quickly, swerving and almost crashing into a wall. He makes it out and I try to sit up.
"Sweetheart, lay down. Are you okay?"
The kind policewoman kneels down by my side and presses her fingers to my wrist. When she detects my pulse, she talks on her Walkie-talkie and a few more police show up. An ambulance also appears next to us and I suddenly notice the harsh pounding in my head. My vision goes black and white and I can't seem to breathe properly.
"Can you tell me your name?"
"Where are your parents?"
"Any younger brothers or sisters with you?"
"Keep her awake!" Someone yells.
The yell rings in my ears, bouncing around in my head and making the pain worse. I try to sit up yet again, but start to feel sick.
***
I wake up to the sound of people speaking in hushed voices. The walls, beds, and lamps around me are all white. So white they burn my eyes with brightness.
The kind of brightness pain you feel looking at your phone after waking up.
I attempt to sit up, and this time it works. I don't feel as sick, but my head is raging.
My eyes make out two figures just next to my bed. Their backs are to me as they speak to someone with a blue cap and blue scrubs. I soon realize I must be in a hospital.
I don't remember much. I just remember being thrown into the back of a van and then being tossed out.
The two figures are the ones speaking in hushed tones and I soon locate them as JJ and Simon. I'm so glad right now.
"JJ?"
I'm surprised when my voice comes out croaky and quiet. My throat is extremely sore and feels raw whenever I try to speak again.
Thankfully, JJ turns around and his eyes light up.
He smiles when he sees me and walks towards me.
"Hey, sweetheart," he speaks softly, running a hand through my long brown hair. "You're in the hospital, love. You also have a concussion and a fractured hand"
I block out what he's saying. I'm in so much pain that thinking about what's wrong inside my body will make it worse.
Simon glances at me and JJ as he continues speaking to the nurse. I don't cry. I want to cry, but I can't.
"Where's the man?" I croak.
JJ frowns and I realize he may not be able to understand me. I am speaking very quietly.
"Shut your eyes for a bit, my love," JJ sighs, pulling the thin hospital bed covers over me. "Hopefully we can take you home in a bit"
I nod and take the orders from JJ. I'm scared to go to sleep and end up back in that van, but I shut my eyes anyway as not to anger JJ.
***
JJ's POV
***
I sigh as I stroke through Holly's wavy brown hair. Her chest rises and falls at a fast pace and I hold her hand. I slowly rub my thumb back and forth over the back of her hand and sigh. The paramedics didn't tell Simon and I anything. I've scheduled a meeting with the police to find out the whole story.
"Poor thing," Simon says, walking over to us.
I raise an eyebrow and sigh. "Yep"
I fall silent. My eyes start to water a little but I quickly fight them back.
"You okay?" Simon asks softly, putting a hand on my shoulder. "If you need a minute, I can stay with her"
"I'm fine," I say sharply. "If you think I'm leaving my daughter here to go be a whiny pansy, you're wrong"
"Okay," Simon replies. "I'll go call the guys and say we can't film the sidemen Sunday today"
"Sounds good," I sigh, feeling bad for snapping at Simon. He was only trying to help.
I stand up and examine Holly's face. She's pale. Like, ghostly pale. Her makeup has run a little and I make a mental note to text Talia to bring makeup wipes.
"Sir, would you like somewhere to lay down?"
"No thank you," I reply to the kind nurse. "I'm good here"
She leaves and I sigh.
***
Simon's POV
***
"Ia she alright? Do you need me to come down?"
"No, it's okay, Vik. We've got it under control"
"How's JJ holding up?" Josh asks.
We're on a group call. Everyone's joined except for JJ. He's busy attending to Holly.
"He's a little on the ropes," I reply with a sigh. "I think he wanted to cry, but I was there so he didn't"
"Poor guy," Harry sighs. "Well, call again if you two need anything"
"Will do," I sigh. "Thanks guys"
"Of course. Holly's our family. You and JJ are our family. We'd do anything for you guys" Tobi points out.
"Anything," Ethan confirms. "I'll be there"
"Thanks boys," I smile, feeling a sense of unity among the group. "I really appreciate it"
***
Holly's POV
***
I wake up again around two pm, according to the big clock positioned on the wall in front of me.
I look down as I feel my hand throbbing and gasp softly. There's a cast encasing my hand and a strong pain in my head.
My room is empty. No signs of doctors, Simon or JJ. I start to feel a little panicked and hungry too.
I take in my surroundings and feel the breath hitch in my throat as I start to remember what happened.
I start to shake. It starts in my fingers and works it's way to my legs. My blinks feel heavy and I feel overly hot as tears make their way into my eyes. I blink them back, scared that someone will come in and see me bawl like a baby.
***
A few minutes later, my room door opens and Simon and JJ walk through. Simon's holding what seems to be a thermos and I sit up, interested.
"How you feeling?" JJ asks, settling himself into the chair next to my bed.
I nod, unable to speak properly.
"Talia made you some soup," Simon smiles warmly, setting the thermos and a cute pink spoon down on my bedside table. "She thought you'd be hungry and need some. Chicken noodle, by the way"
Aww, Talia. She knows my favorite soup.
"Thanks," I reply with a thinning voice, softly smiling up at the two of them.
Simon says he has a few calls to make and steps out of the room for a bit. JJ stays with me.
"The boys are coming to see you soon," he smiles, taking my hand in his. "They all send their love and hugs"
I nod, since I can't say anything else and squeeze JJ's hand.
"You hungry?" JJ asks, nodding towards the thermos on my bedside table.
I look down at my hand and sigh when I see it's my right hand that's fucked. I usually do everything with that hand.
"You need help?" JJ chuckles, already reaching for the soup.
I nod.
"Okay," he nods back. "I'll help you, baby"
I smile at him gratefully and watch as he unscrews the lid of the thermos. Steam and the smell of chicken waft out, making me feel hungrier than I am.
"Damn, this smells good," JJ smirks, teasingly mimicking eating the soup himself.
He stops when I glare at him. How dare he.
"Alright, fine," JJ sighs, shaking his head.
JJ feeds me slowly, taking care to make sure the soup isn't to hot. It's the perfect temperature and tastes heavenly.
It's a bit embarrassing to have my dad feed me soup, but JJ realizes and makes sure to have a conversation with me. I nod and shake my head as he asks me questions. None of which have to do with what happened, which I'm grateful for.
***
JJ lets me go back to sleep after eating and kisses my forehead, letting me know he'll be here by my side in case I need anything.
I shut my eyes and feel a wave of emotion pass over me. I feel sick at the thought and remembrance of Daniel.
Like, really sick. So sick I'm convinced I'm well and truly ill.
***
The next day, I'm finally allowed to go home. JJ signs the discharge papers and Simon drives us all to the flat.
On the way home, I look at my phone for the first time in three days. My concussion is slowly ebbing away so the doctor has allowed me to look at a screen again.
As soon as we get home, JJ sends me to bed with a mug of tea for my throat and a phone ban.
"But I just got it back!" I protest, pouting at JJ.
"Don't give me that look," JJ chuckles, ruffling my hair. "You know you need to rest. Besides, the doctor said you should try to be on it less for the rest of the week"
"I'm a teenager!" I argue. "How does he expect me to do that?"
"With much pain," JJ says, clearly amused. "Now get to bed. I'll check on you soon"
***
I get into bed and sip my tea slowly. Simon comes in to check on me a few times during the day when JJ pops out to run errands, and attend meetings.
It's now seven pm. JJ should be home any minute.
Knock knock
"Come in!"
Simon opens the door and walks into my bedroom. He takes my empty mug of tea.
"Anything else, your majesty?"
"No, that will be all, thank you peasant"
"Peasant!" Simon protests. "I'm no peasant"
I laugh and smile when he gives me a small smile back.
"You sure you don't want anything else, sweetheart?"
I nod. "Yeah, I'm alright, Simon. Thanks though"
He nods and walks towards my windows. He lowers the blinds so my room is dark.
"Get some rest, kiddo"
I nod and lay down.
I frown when I hear Simon stumble into something. I sit up, alarmed and laugh when I see Simon on the floor.
"You alright, mate?" I laugh.
Simon stands up and rolls his eyes at me with a smile. He turns on the lamp by my desk and looks at the floor. My eyes follow his and I feel my heartbeat in my throat when I realize what is lying there.
I jump out of bed to retrieve the photos of Daniel Kelark, but feel dizzy and stop.
"Holly get back into bed, weirdo," Simon smiles, bending down to pick up the photos himself. "What are these anyway? Your baby photos?"
Simon flips the photos over and I watch as his smile fades away. He flips through the others, examining them slowly and precisely. I feel sick and want to tell him to stop, but somehow I don't think he'll listen to a fifteen year old girl telling him what to do.
"P-put them back," I mumble. "Please"
Simon looks at me. He's frowning and doesn't look happy.
"Holly, where did you get these?"
"It doesn't matter-" I start. "It's none of your business"
"Yes it does!" Simon says sharply. "Your business is my business"
Simon's voice is raised and harsh. I flinch and feel my heartbeat elevate.
"Holly, where did you get these?" Simon repeats, dropping the photos on my desk with a loud smack. "And don't think about lying to me either. Why didn't you tell JJ or me that you found your dad slash fucking kidnapper?"
"I-I'm sorry," I sniff.
"You do realize how much danger you've put yourself in, right? We could've stopped this if we knew who he was!"
"Y-you're scaring me," I mumble.
"Holly, this isn't a fucking game! You get that, right? You could've been taken!"
"Stop yelling at me!" I cry, burying my face in my bed covers. "I'm sorry"
The room becomes silent. I hear footsteps and assume it's Simon, but when I hear the door open, I realize JJ's home.
"Hey, what's going on?" JJ asks, his tone sounding short of breath.
"Holly's been hiding these photos from us," Simon says.
"Please don't let them be bad," JJ sighs. "Holly, I've warned you about distributing underage pictures of yourself-"
"They're of her dad," Simon cuts in, now in a calmer tone. "He's the guy we saw trying to kidnap her. She knew it was him on the news"
"This is why you were so weird last week," JJ exhales slowly. "Holly, what the hell? Why didn't you tell us?"
I keep my face buried in my comforter and try to calm the sickness I feel rocking back and forth in my stomach.
"Holly, sit up, please," JJ says firmly. "Now"
I sit up and wipe my face. I see JJ through blurry eyes and am thankful that I can't see the disappointment in his eyes.
"Listen to me," JJ sighs, sitting next to me on the bed. "It's natural to wonder who your biological parents are, okay? It's not a crime. The real problem is when he's out here, hurting people looking for you. That's a big problem because if I knew that he was your father, I would've had you stay home all day everyday"
I nod.
"Simon and I are worried, sweetheart," JJ says, squeezing my hand gently. "We love you too much to let you get taken from us. Simon got a little upset, but it's okay. You're safe, you're fine, and that's all that matters. The police are out trying to find him as we speak"
I nod again and blink, letting fat teardrops fall down my cheeks.
"Don't cry," JJ says softly, wiping my tears with his thumb. "I'm not cross with you"
"I'm not cross either," Simon sighs, sitting on the other side of me. "I'm just really worried. I don't want your father to hurt you again"
***
After dinner, JJ gets me an ice pack for my cheek and Simon makes us all a hot chocolate. The bruise on my cheek from Daniel's punch is still pretty prominent and it even hurts to put ice on it.
"If I could, I'd kill that bastard," JJ sighs, helping me position the ice pack in the least painful way possible. "How dare he lay a finger on you"
"I'm fine," I sigh. "I just don't wanna talk about it anymore"
JJ nods. "Okay. Fair enough"
"Drinks are ready," Simon announces, walking into the living room with three steamy mugs of chocolate heaven. "What movie have you chosen?"
***
After watching ET, JJ has a meeting to attend to and I go to bed early.
Just as I'm about to go to sleep, there's a knock on my door and Simon pokes his head in.
"Hey," I sigh, taking my high ponytail out. "What's up?"
Simon walks towards me and sits on my bed.
"You okay?" He asks.
I nod. "I'm fine"
"You sure? I'm sorry about yelling earlier. That was very uncool of me to do and I should've asked first"
Simon sounds genuine and sincere. I slowly let my guard down with him as I melt into a hug he offers.
"Thanks, Si"
"Of course," Simon smiles, letting me go. "Now go to bed. We have a busy day of people visiting"
I shut my eyes and lie down, snuggling into my covers. Simon kisses my forehead, turns the lights off and whispers a quiet goodnight before leaving.
***
A few days later
***
JJ finally lets me have my phone. I'm so happy.
"Can I stream too?" I ask at the breakfast table, watching JJ take down a whole salmon bagel.
He chews for a bit before swallowing and nodding.
"Sure, but don't go to bed too late"
I jump up from my seat and give him a big hug. He rolls his eyes and pats my hands.
"Thanks, JJ. You're the best"
"Go away and let me eat in peace"
I laugh at his grumpiness and skip all the way to my room. Steaming on twitch has been the contributing factor to my happiness.
I immediately start the stream and smile as people start to join. People seem glad to see me in the chat and I type "just chatting" into the description bar.
I ignore questions about why I was gone and feel guilty when my viewers go down. It's not fair to them, I know, but I don't want to disclose any information about myself anymore.
***
As it hits midnight, I grab my phone and text Talia a happy birthday. I tell my stream to go tweet Talia a happy birthday and smile when I hear the doorbell ring.
I say goodbye to chat, end the stream and walk out to the living room. Talia's in a beautiful cream dress and her red lipstick makes her look so beautifully fierce. Her heels are high but Simon standing next to her is still taller.
"We're off," he says, opening the door and bowing down to Talia. "Ladies first"
"Wait," I say, giving Talia a big hug. "Happy birthday"
"Aww, Holly. Thank you," she replies, hugging me back.
I release her and watch as the couple shut the door behind them. I suddenly feel lonely.
I need someone.
***