"WHAT IN EVER-LOVING HELLS ARE YOU DOI— GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER!"
"Wha— OUCH HYUNG FOR ZEUS'S SAKE—"
"Oh lord help me KIM NAMJOON GET OFF HIM!"
It really and truly amazed you how you hadn't lost your mind yet as you skidded off the counter and in between your seemingly feral little brother and a understandably traumatized Taehyung.
So... you loved your brother. You really did— he'd been your rock for almost all your life, your constant support, and even though you two weren't biologically related, he was the closest family you had, really. You loved your parents, but you'd always been the most connected to Namjoon— you two stood by each other until the end.
But for crying out loud, this was getting slightly ridiculous.
Namjoon was usually very level-headed, had a calming presence and assured aura that instantly put you, at least, at ease. His dyed whitish-silver hair was usually swept up into a neat quiff over his head and then draped down immaculately over his eyes— he'd always been somewhat of a perfectionist, from his perfectly pressed clothes to even the amount of eyeliner he put on (okay, that was a joke, but he DID put some on once in high school, and it was one of the most hilarious moments of your life).
BUT ANWAY— POINT WAS, your brother Kim Namjoon had no business looking like he did at the moment— and that is to say, a perfect mess. He looked like he'd fallen asleep in his half-buttoned dress shirt, his hair was sticking out in multiple directions, making him finally look the part of Einstein (he already had his brain, so you suppose it completed the effect), and his face was red and he was panting as if he'd sprinted up twelve flights of stairs.
You hadn't even had time to react before your little brother's fingers were twisted harshly against the back of Taehyung's throat, throwing him back and then fisting the front of the astonished, red-haired demigod's shirt with a snarl etched on his face.
"Gods, Taehyung, you are so lucky right now," Namjoon growled lowly, almost so quietly you couldn't hear him, but you weren't deaf just quite yet, although with all the yelling going on you thought you were beginning to get there, "if this was any other circumstance, you'd be punted all the way to the Underworld right now, you hear?"
...I must have misheard.
Taehyung's weird way of talking is getting to my brain.
You knew Taehyung could fight back from this— he was a f*cking demigod, for crying out loud. You'd seen him open a ten-pound crate lid with a flick of his wrist and send it flying.
But he did nothing but stare at Namjoon, frozen, eyes flickering to you and ambivalence coursing through him.
"Joon, that's ENOUGH!" you finally felt your vocal cords unstick from the dry walls of your throat and you kicked your brother in the shin, relishing in his squeak of pain when you hauled him back, loosing his hold on Taehyung. "What in the world is wrong with you?"
"What's wrong with ME?" Namjoon spluttered, rounding on you at your accusing glare and returning it, "the question is, what the hell is wrong with you?"
Well exCUSe ME.
You gaped at the familiar glare Namjoon was throwing you, the accusing one that usually surfaced when the two of you were fighting over who ate the other's leftovers or something. How were YOU in the wrong here? He'd been the one asking you to get laid and some sh*t!
Not that you were going to sleep with Taehyung.
Making that distinction right now— that was NOT something that was on your bucket list.
Sort of.
"Well EXCUSE ME for being ALARMED when you GODDAMN COME BURSTING INTO MY HOUSE LIKE THE FBI AND START TRYING TO BEAT UP MY FRIEND!" you yelled, jabbing a single finger into Namjoon's chest with every enunciated word.
Taehyung raised an eyebrow at you over Namjoon's back and leaned against the wall, arms crossed and seemed to force himself into looking far too relaxed for someone who'd about to have had his a*s handed to him.
As if Namjoon could sense the look Taehyung threw at you and the way you aggressively yeeted all thoughts of Taehyung being anything more than a friend to you out the damn window, your little brother snorted.
"Sure didn't look like you two were just friends, Y/N-ah," Namjoon hissed, eyes flashing angrily. Your eyebrows furrowed— who lost his AirPods this time? There couldn't be any other possible explanation as to why he was so pissed.
And Taehyung, being the complete and utter genius he was, just had to take that moment to speak.
"And what if we're not?" the son of Ares drawled silkily, two strides and a purposeful shove past Namjoon putting him right at your side, arm instantly lashing out and hooking itself around your waist, tugging you against his chest possessively and ignoring the way your brother's eyes bugged and he seethed, looking as if smoke was about to come pouring out of his ears. "What's it to you, hyung?"
Maybe Taehyung meant this as a mockery— honestly, with the way he was holding you, it wouldn't shock you whatsoever if he was just calling your little brother 'hyung', an honorific that implied respect and closeness, just to tick him off.
But still, you couldn't help but overthink the familiar way it rolled off his tongue.
A flush threatened to burst over your cheeks and probably light another fuse for your brother to explode on when you felt Taehyung's firm muscles press into your rigid spine, having you feel every single plane and cord that crossed Taehyung's chest.
"Oh for heavens sake, Taehyung—" you snapped irritably, bringing your hand down on the crook of his elbow and making him whine quietly, loosening his hold on you enough to slip away and ignoring the way your entire body burned at the close way he held you, right in front of your brother. You knew Taehyung was slightly problematic, the type to be aggressive and pick fights (well, he gave off that vibe anyway, being a son of Ares and all), but you were trying NOT to have your apartment destroyed today, thanks, and if things got out of hand, with these two men, that was exactly what was going to happen.
"Gods, pretty one, you're so violent," Taehyung groaned and flicked his arm, bottom lip jutting out into a faint pout when you glared at him.
Your eyes fell on a dangerously silent Namjoon, his eyes taking in the two of you with an almost scary analysis. "Runs in the family," you snapped, turning your glare at your little brother, "as you can probably see from the way this DUMBA*S decided to start—
"Y/N, stay out of this," Namjoon narrowed his eyes at you and protectively trying to step in front of you, a gesture that made you press the palm of your hand into your forehead with a groan. You supposed this idiot had always been a little overprotective, but of late, you'd started to assume that he was in the camp that WANTED you to get over your past fears of relationships.
NOT THAT YOU WANTED A RELATIONSHIP WITH TAEHYUNG.
Sort of.
"Namjoon, I swear to f*cking god," you huffed irritably as your brother once again tried to lunge past you at Taehyung, who was giving off both offended and annoyed vibes that peeked out of his initial shock, "just tell me what's wrong, okay? What's gotten into you?"
You couldn't help the slight concern that made its way into your voice when you carefully stepped a little closer to Namjoon, trying to figure out what was making him so incensed. Your brother ran fingers through his hair in distress, but his eyes slowly softened when your voice turned slightly gentler.
"Y/N-ah, I'm only going to tell you this once," Namjoon's eyes fixed properly on you for the first time and he sighed, his anger slowly seeming to fizzle out, "but please don't fool around with him, I'm telling you, it's a terrible idea—"
Oh, as if I don't know that.
Yeah, it was a bad idea. You didn't need Namjoon to tell you that, even though his reasoning would be different from yours. Taehyung was the kind of person that left shattered hearts in his wake, who lived life with no regrets and didn't settle down. A class-A seductive bastard. That was one thing.
On the less normal side of the spectrum, you had the fact that this guy was literally half god. And he was immortal. And he couldn't even touch you. And you were trying your very hardest to get rid of him, and then he'd probably never think of you again.
Wow. Now that you thought about it... it really was a god-awful idea. Why'd you even consider it in the first place?
Right at that moment, you felt a small twinge of gratefulness that your brother had come barging in when he did. Because if he hadn't... you would have done something that logically made no sense whatsoever. Something that was setting you up to get hurt, no matter how attracted you were to Taehyung and his oddly endearing ways.
Oh god, you would have KISSED Kim Taehyung.
"Joon, I'm not 'fooling around' with Taehyung," you said firmly, a surprisingly severe spike of resolve hardening, one that assured that you wouldn't, not now or later. Taehyung lips parted slightly and his eyes snapped to you at those words, the smallest flash of something that looked surprisingly like hurt in those dark irises. You ignored it. "And even if I was, that's no reason to start trying to beat him up! You've never even met him before, what the f*ck?"
Namjoon opened and closed his mouth at your suddenly narrowed eyes as that thought hit you. Yeah, Namjoon didn't know Taehyung... he literally couldn't, considering Taehyung was immortal and had been MIA for about a thousand years.
So why was your lil bro looking guiltier than the time he broke your phone by goddamn knocking it off the coffee table?
You raised your eyebrows expectantly at Namjoon, not liking the small seeds of an idea you really did NOT want in your head being planted there with every heartbeat of silence.
But before your idiot brother could say anything, Taehyung spoke up, his tone as husky and velvety and light as ever even as his eyes fixated on you with a darkness that made you want to shrink back.
"Actually," the red-haired demigod hummed, tilting his head curiously at Namjoon when he finally tore his gaze from you, "I have a question for you, hyung. How do you two know each other?"
Your eyes narrowed at the question and Taehyung quickly reiterated.
"I mean, you two are acting pretty familiar... hyung, did you know about this?"
You didn't like the glare Namjoon suddenly shot Taehyung, one that conveyed 'please shut the hell up'. You didn't like the familiar way Taehyung spoke to Namjoon, the careful curiosity there that certainly wasn't one that you'd see from someone speaking to a person for the first time.
You didn't like this.
"He's my brother," you said slowly, something finally clicking into place when you whipped your head around to stare at Namjoon, who was tugging his bottom lip between his teeth, alarm blazing all over his chiseled face. Oh, he knew it. He knew that there was no point in using his smooth talk to get him out of this, not when you were just as clever.
Taehyung clearly wasn't expecting that, though. His eyebrows raised and his lips parted into a small 'o'. "He— what?"
"He's my brother," you repeated, eyes fixed on the floor as words began to tumble out of you, inadvertently thinking out loud as both men standing by you watched, "but that should have been obvious, no? I mean, why else would he be so protective over me, know where I live— right? But you clearly— you thought he was here for something else, then. You know my brother."
You looked up, not stopping as you turned to face the both of them. "And not just that— Joon, you were the one asking me to get laid, and all of a sudden, you start going crazy over someone you shouldn't have any idea exists. And then you tell me that 'fooling around with him', as you put it, is a terrible idea. You wouldn't know that unless... you know Taehyung."
"Y/N," Namjoon began slowly when you lapsed into a faint silence, "hang on a se—"
You looked between their faces, and it was strange to you how quickly it hit you, how hard.
"Oh holy starfish," you hissed between your teeth, a faintly hysterical laugh loosing itself from the back of your throat, "you're the friend, aren't you?"
Namjoon was silent. Taehyung's eyebrows furrowed as he glanced between you and the silver-haired man.
"You're the friend Taehyung sent the message to," you were still laughing, crazed and panicked, "That's you, isn't it?"
It didn't take very long for Namjoon to understand that he was screwed over then and there.
"Y/N, think about this for a— OUCH DON'T HIT ME HOLY F*CK—"
"KIM NAMJOON GET YOUR A*S OVER HERE SO I CAN WHACK IT INTO NEXT WEEK'S MOLDY CHEESESTICKS YOU LITTLE SON OF A—"
"OUCH WHAT THE F—"
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU A*SHAT?"
"WOULD YOU HAVE— OUCH HOLY SH*T— BELIEVED ME?"
"STOP MOVING!"
"STOP CHASING ME WITH THAT FLYSWATTER OF CERTAIN DEATH THEN!"
"Okay!" you felt strong arms suddenly wrap themselves around your waist from behind, effectively halting your movements as you just began to leap over the couch to start whacking Namjoon with the obnoxiously pink flyswatter gripped in your tightly-clenched fist. Your brother involuntarily flinched back, but there was no need, evidently, because now you were caged in between a familiar pair of lean, corded arms that hauled you back as if you weighed almost nothing despite your incessant struggling. "Okay, that is enough of harassing your... brother, love."
"Taehyung, let me go right now or so help me—!" you writhed in Taehyung's annoyingly firm grip, trying to come in contact with his skin so you'd be free to beat the sh*t out of Namjoon again, but the demigod was careful in the way he handled you, throwing you over his shoulder as easily as if you were a pillow as you yelped before placing you down, immobilizing your arms, and pinning you to the wall.
"Not until you calm down, darling," Taehyung chuckled breathily when you fought a little longer, but you knew it was fruitless. Taehyung was about as fightable as a freaking dragon when faced with a toothpick for a weapon.
Y'all get the picture, right?
Finally, you went limp in his hold, noting for the first time the proximity Taehyung had put you into— his lips were inches from yours, dark eyes boring holes where your eyesockets were, legs firmly pressed against yours to trap you against the wall.
Panic flooded you when Taehyung's gaze wound lazily down your stiffly immobile form, leaving lines of fire blazing across your skin. Crap, you already told yourself you weren't going to do this no matter how much you wanted to! Goddamn Taehyung for once again throwing a wrench in your logic. God. Damn. Taehyung.
"Okay!" you quickly choked out, staring at your feet, "Okay, I'm calm. Let me go now."
You did catch the faint frown that weaved its way over Taehyung's prefect lips, pulling them downward as he continued to tilt his head at you.
"You won't try to hit hyung again?" he prompted, tipping his head closer as if Namjoon wasn't standing right there.
"Alright, fine! I won't! Just let me go!" your voice raised in pitch, the agitation you'd been feeling seeping into your tone. Taehyung's firm hold slackened a little bit, his face falling imperceptibly when you shoved him harshly away from you and refused to look at him.
"Taehyung, don't touch her," Namjoon hissed, beginning to start up again after he'd recovered from his 'crouching behind the couch' stage. You, though, whirled on your brother (wait, was he really your brother? Or... god, your brain refused to compute anymore).
"I AM NOT DONE WITH YOU, KIM NAMJOON!" you hollered, whipping your attention from Taehyung to glare at him, noting in satisfaction the way he cringed back.
"Can we sit down and talk about this like civilized people?" Namjoon prompted hesitantly, eyeing the flyswatter in your hand with wariness. You scowled heavily, but with a warning look from Taehyung when you shifted your makeshift weapon in your hands as if to hit him again, you finally relented.
"Alright," you spat bluntly, abruptly moving away from Taehyung (and ignoring the little sigh the demigod let out when you did so) and sitting on one of the comfy chairs in your living room. Gosh, this was too much to handle for a day, and it had barely even started. "Talk."
"You have a lot of explaining to do as well," your brother huffed pointedly, crossing his arms over his chest as he took a seat on the couch, "why exactly is Kim Taehyung in your HOUSE?"
"That's a long story," you muttered, still refusing to meet eyes with said demigod. You could sense the way he grew slightly hurt at the way you were clearly trying to ignore him, but did he seriously think that this wouldn't be awkward? You'd been about to be locking lips just a few minutes ago— and in hindsight, you realized that would have been an utterly stupid idea.
"I have time," Namjoon pressed his lips together and glanced at Taehyung who just tipped his head up and stared back.
"And I asked first," you snapped back, making your 'brother' sigh, letting his head hang. The familiar action made something hurt in your chest. "Look, the past week or so has been just... crazy for me, okay? I think I can handle whatever you need to tell me."
Truth be told, you weren't surprised when Namjoon finally looked up, tilting his head at the ceiling and letting out a long sigh. "Alright. Fine. I'm a demigod, Y/N."
You pressed your lips together and waited for him to continue in silence, a sort of blankness falling over your expression. Your initial anger and distress was slowly filtering away into... nothing. You just watched flatly as Namjoon took a deep breath and met your dead eyes. If you were going to get through this without breaking down... you needed to be emotionless.
Taehyung let a breath of air hiss out from between his teeth, resting his head in his hands and watching you.
"I'm a son of Athena," Namjoon finally murmured, pushing fingers through his silver hair, "and I've been alive centuries before Taehyung has. I'm immortal, and I don't usually come down to the mortal realm... but the last time I did, I sensed you. You're my kin, and even though you've only got a little godly blood in you, it's enough to attract monsters and all. Your mom also had Athena's blood in her— jeez, Mom was one of the lucky ones. She lived for a long time for a part-demigod, but maybe that's because she didn't know. But anyway... I knew I needed to protect you. Sometimes the godly gene is dormant, see? In Mom it was, but not in you."
You exhaled long and hard, Namjoon carefully watching you, gauging your reaction.
"I know I'm part-demigod," you finally mumbled, trying your hardest to make it seem like your voice wasn't breaking, "Adra saw it. Taehyung saw it. I know already, Joon. I'm asking about you."
You hated this. You hated this feeling of being powerless, of not knowing enough to put you ahead. You knew Namjoon did as well— everything was clicking in place now, slowly but surely.
Namjoon nodded quickly. "Right. Right. Y/N... we really are related. You're my kin, my blood, and I just felt the need to protect you. If I hadn't, I doubt you would have made it past twelve. Please understand me. I shifted my form and drank Lethe water to make me grow up alongside you, to wipe my memory just enough for a couple years to avoid suspicion after I casted the protection spell. That's how I did it."
Silence.
"Joon..." this time, the tremble in your voice was completely evident. It was one thing if the universe hid things from you. It was one thing if your boss hid things from you. Hell, it was one thing if Taehyung hid things from you (and you knew he did; he certainly didn't tell you everything about his life).
It was another thing altogether if your brother, the closest person you had in your life, the one you had always trusted to tell you everything and always trusted to confide in, had literally been lying to you your entire life.
This was too much.
"Why didn't you tell me?" you whispered, not even realizing tears were threatening to spill from your eyes until you felt the sting of them stab at your irises, "Joon, we're supposed to tell each other everything... why would you even..."
Taehyung's head snapped up when you finally let the flood of sudden feelings you'd been forcibly chaining back go.
F*ck my life I'm crying.
You hated crying. It made your head hurt and it made you seem weak and it made you feel like one of those dumb female leads from the k-dramas that sobbed at every wrong turn.
You fingers angrily swiped at your cheeks, revealing the droplets now splayed across them, and both males seated on your living room couch leapt up.
"Y/N-ah? Oh my god, I'm sorry," Namjoon skidded to kneel in front of you, the a*shole being tall enough to look you in the eye even on his knees, hands coming to clasp yours, "please don't cry, please don't cry, I'm so sorry."
"Shut up, Joon," you muttered, staring at the floor, "just... shut up."
Your brother shut up, okay, sure, yes. But then he also pulled you up into a hug, warm arms wrapping around you and letting your bury your face into his chest, and you didn't even have the energy to fight off the warm, calming, familiar feeling.
"I'm sorry," he mumbled into your hair, "I don't know what you've been going through for the past week but I know it must have been a lot and then this was a bombshell and I KNOW I should have been the one to tell you about all this but I was scared and I was waiting for the right time and I swear I didn't mean to hurt you, Y/N, I'm sorry."
You sighed. This was your annoying, dorky, caring brother at his finest.
"Why is it so hard to stay mad at you?" you muttered sullenly into his shirt, the comfort he provided making your tears dry quicker than they should have, "Dumba*s. I should hit you again."
"Please don't," Namjoon joked, making you huff irritably even though you weren't all that angry anymore. Then, quieter, he hugged you tighter. "You know I love you, right?"
You rolled your eyes. "Stop trying to get out of this, Joon, you're still in trouble."
"So I'm not allowed to tell my sister I love her?"
"Ugh, shut up, you're getting sappy," you pushed yourself off Namjoon and dramatically shook yourself. "Gosh, Namjoon, this is so much to take in— of course you had to have come barging in here right now—"
"So you just wanted me to let Taehyung kiss you?" your brother scoffed, shooting a look at the red-haired demigod who'd been awkwardly watching the interaction with faint interest and concern. You yelped indignantly and smacked your brother on your shoulder.
"I wasn't going to kiss him!" you yelled, not noticing the way Taehyung's eyes narrowed substantially at you, "Joon, you're really not making this better for yourself!"
"Okay, okay! Don't hit me again!"
You rolled your eyes, swinging your hand back as if to do just that, glad that your brother was playing off your faint moment of weakness— and then something from Namjoon's pocket crackled.
Your first thought was that damn, he'd managed to break something in there again.
Your second thought only hit you when Namjoon sighed and pulled out a plastic, toy walkie-talkie, obnoxiously purple and green, and that was that your brother had finally knocked some girl up and gotten her pregnant through his stupid f*ckboy ways and how he had to deal with a kid.
Honestly, if that was the case, you wouldn't be surprised or even disappointed— you'd be too busy cackling to lecture him on condom use.
Your last thought was interrupted by the sudden screeching and barely-distinguishable voice that came exploding from the toy (how did something so TINY manage to make so much NOISE?) when your brother resignedly sighed and pressed a button on the side of it.
"Yo Namjoon! Is it safe to come up yet? Your sister settled down?"
Namjoon uneasily glanced at you as you shot him an irritated deadpan.
This b*tch.
"I hate you," you muttered matter-of-factly, making Taehyung on the side snort (something that shouldn't have made you smile, but it did). "And what the hell, man? You communicate with your friends using walkie-talkies from ToysRUs?"
"Uh..."
A/N: So I may or may not be on crack guys, but okay! Here y'all go! I'm sorry if it was super confusing, please tell me if you think I should clarify anything... jeez I don't know whether to feel good or disappointed about this chapter haha. Next one is the reunion! Tbh I love the dynamic between Y/N and Namjoon, I kinda based it off my own life lol—
ANYWAYS THANK YOU GUYS FOR 200 FOLLOWERS AND 4K READS! I LOVE Y'ALL!