Warning(s): smut, mentions of drug abuse
My back, cloaked with sweat, arched off of the crisp white bedsheet, making me look as though I was in the middle of being exorcised as Nikki swept his ringed fingers over my clit.
"This is the best fuckin' pussy I've ever had" he rasped out which caused me to moan that little bit harder, tightening my legs around his waist as he brought himself closer.
My neck craned backwards when his teeth and lips met my nipple, tugging at my sensitive flesh, noticing the way I couldn't seem to hold myself upright because I was overstimulated and uncomfortable. But, like always, I wanted more.
"Oh, fuck..." my words came out weak as I watched Nikki slow his pace, pumping in and out of me, grinning at the mess that he had made of the woman underneath him.
My hair tousled, cheeks stained with mascara because I was shedding tear after tear while sucking his dick, purple bruises scattered my chest, bite marks, scratches, sweat-drenched arms, face, torso and legs. A big fucking mess.
Nikki quickly pulled out when he felt me coming, jacked himself off onto my stomach, and groaned at the sight before his very eyes.
Chest heaving, legs aching, eyes that were refusing to open. I felt like I had just been hit by a bus, not fucked by my husband in an attempt to get me to stop ignoring him.
He leaned in to kiss my lips but I dodged him, jerking my head to the side before I was rolling out of bed and storming across the carpet.
"Oh, come on, Chris. You just spent the last two hours with my cock in various parts of you, moaning my damn name like it's going out of fashion and telling me how hard you want me to fuck you, but now you're giving me the silent treatment?!"
I stepped into the bathroom to grab my panties, bra and dress and slammed the door behind me.
Once again, we were back on the road, and being back on the road meant that we were running into a multitude of issues.
It had been 21 whole days of Nikki successfully avoiding addressing our argument on New Year's Eve, and 21 whole days of me resenting my husband for that exact reason. But it had also been 21 whole days of, a majority of, time spent with Heather and Sharise, and I was slowly but surely trying my hardest to ease off on my heroin usage.
But I still couldn't seem to kick it. No matter how hard I tried. No matter how many evenings were spent sobbing, shaking, screaming, being talked to by the girls, being begged by Tommy, I had a number of issues with even thinking about quitting.
On the bright side, I had a little something to look forward to. One night, before we set off, we all headed out to dinner per request of Mr. Tommy Lee, and while we were at that restaurant he made quite the announcement.
He and Heather were getting married in May of '86 and, naturally, he wanted Nikki to be his best man. He accepted the proposal with an unintelligible amount of glee for his best friend, and decided that we all were to get royally fucked up in celebration of the forthcoming wedding.
Despite his, semi artificial, happiness for Tommy and Heather, Nikki fucking Sixx was still skating on extremely thin ice with yours truly.
"It's been like three weeks. You can't keep avoiding me, Christine" he said lowly as I pulled my heels from the suitcase and forced it shut when I was done.
Childishly, I ignored him. Instead, I decided on slipping the strap of my stiletto into the buckle, taking my time before moving onto the other.
"Fine" he growled.
Nikki grabbed at my purse and angrily dropped it down onto the bed next to me, clearing the vanity so he could set out a few lines for himself. He gestured to the baggy in his hand but I shook my head--no matter how badly I wanted to get jacked up, another moment spent with him was another moment closer to me ripping his head off.
"Don't wait around for me."
"I won't" I spat before slinging my leather jacket over my shoulder, snatching my bag from the mattress, and stomping my way across the carpet to the door.
Tommy, Mick, Vince, Sharise, Heather and Mick's girlfriend Nina were all waiting with Doc and Doug in the lobby of the hotel. Sharise already looked as though she was ready to call it a night.
I ran my fingers through my hair and pulled on the hem of my dress when I noticed a mirror in the hallway, and felt anger start to bubble out of me as Nikki stormed his way down the hall.
"You can't seriously still be mad at me?"
"I can." I side eyed him and headed over to the couches that everyone was sat on, groaning out because he made big strides to catch up to me.
"We've fucked at least once a day for the last three weeks, you've been desperate to get jacked up with me and you were perfectly fine with me the few days before we set off. What the fuck has changed, Christine?"
I tried to keep walking, smiling at Vince as he clocked us, but started to roll my eyes when Nikki pulled my hand back and I stumbled into him.
"What?!"
"Tell me why you're so mad at me. How will I know how I'm gonna make this better if you won't even talk to me?" I shrugged. "Humor me here! Give me something!"
I didn't know what to bring up first. The fight? The fact that I wanted to try and kick smack but it was too difficult to even talk to him about? Or should I have brought up Vanity and the countless voicemails she would leave, asking Nikki to call her back in that sickly sweet voice of hers?
Remembering what my nana had always said about ignorance being bliss, I just continued down the hall and pretended like I wasn't about to start crying.
"You're a fucking joke" he stated calmly, pushing his way past me when I stopped dead in my tracks and stared at him with a look of venom as he sauntered over to the table.
"I'm a fucking joke?" I shook my head and followed behind him.
Doc stared at me expectantly as I took my time heading over, hoping that Nikki and the guys would leave before the girls and I.
"What's that?" he asked, pointing to my neck.
I looked down at the purple bruise and shrugged. "A hickey."
"Seriously? You're doing an interview tomorrow! You can't show the band, and yourself, up with a fucking hickey right on your neck, in plain sight, for everyone to see!!"
"I'm gonna show the band up?" I questioned with my brows raised. Nikki shook his head because he knew that I was in a shitty mood and didn't have time for that man. "I think you'll find that the band will show themselves up. They don't need me to do that, Doc."
"Aren't you going to at least cover it before you go out tonight?!"
"Nope."
"Christine, you look..." Vince trailed off as he bit down on his lower lip.
I felt tears start to well in my eyes, which was starting to become a regular thing, at the mere thought of Vince Neil about to call me a slut. That one hurt.
Nikki scoffed. "Don't fucking go there, Vince. I can't deal with her being mad at you too."
"You're all fucking kids!" Heather blurted out as she side eyed Tommy--something was telling me that she might've had a few issues with her fiancée that day too.
"Let's just fucking go" Mick growled, taking Nina out with him to get away from whatever the hell was happening in the lobby.
I stared blankly at Nikki and tried to blink away a few tears, but the more I eyed him the more I felt myself start to choke up.
"Alright, you know the drill" Doug stated, sympathetically gazing in my direction "couple up, let the paps take a few pictures and get into the car."
"What if I want to switch couples--"
Heather smacked at Tommy's chest. "Quit whining and grow up."
His jaw hung low as he pointed at her, but Doug just rolled his eyes and sent the pair of them on their way.
Nikki reached for my hand as I tried to walk ahead of him, and pulled me closer. "Stay mad at me all you want, but I'm not letting you storm off on your own and get lost tonight."
"I'm not going to get lost" I quietly thanked him as he held the door open for me, before closing it behind him and leading me to the car.
"You wouldn't get lost if I just let you go right now?" he asked in a laugh and I shook my head. "Alright, sweet. Tell me where we are and I'll let you leave me right now."
I slid into the backseat of the car that Nikki and I were taking and pursed my lips, trying to figure out whether we were even in Europe or not. "Okay, fine. I don't know what country we're in, but I am still mad at you."
He shut the door as he got in next to me, his hand squeezing my thigh on instinct. "Well, if you talk to me about why you're mad, then maybe I can do something about it.." he kissed the side of my neck before his fingers were squeezing my chin, tilting my head towards him.
"Nikki....stop it. You know why I'm mad" I argued weakly, biting back a whine because the feeling of his lips against my skin always drove me insane.
"Is this because of what happened at that party on New Year's?" he asked with his lips on my neck. My eyes fluttered closed while I nodded. "I didn't think you were still thinking about that."
"It's all I've been able to think about..."
He pecked my lips, ran his thumb over my cheek, and sighed out. "I'm sorry for being a dick to you, Chris. I just got so fuckin' heated because I thought you were trying to throw everything that I've done for you back in my face."
I pouted as I felt tears fall to the apples of my cheeks, and Nikki rested his forehead against mine.
"I would never do that, I swear. I'm so grateful for everything that you do for me, Nikki" I choked out "but sometimes I just want to be able to do things for myself. And I'd really like your support with those things..."
He smiled at me and nodded--albeit slowly. "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Yeah. Okay. I'll show you some more support, with whatever you wanna do, because you're my wife" I let out a satisfied sigh "and you deserve all the support in the world. Hell, you've supported me through everything. It's about time I pay it back to you, angel."
I kissed him softly, grinning at the way his fingers danced across my knee.
"Keep calling me angel and I might be willing for you to put a baby in me" I teased, instantly regretting it because I saw the look of sadness wash across his face--instantly realizing how poorly judged that joke probably was. "I--"
The car came to a stop right outside whatever venue we were supposed to be arriving at, and Nikki pulled himself away from me. I sat and watched as he angrily removed himself from the leather seat and started to stomp his way up the steps, completely disregarding me.
I pulled up the strap of my dress that had fallen to my shoulder, and stepped out of the vehicle to meet Sharise and Heather who were waiting for me outside.
"What the hell happened in the fifteen minutes we left you?"
"We made up" they both swooned "but then I made a joke about having babies, and now he's gonna hate me for the rest of the night."
Sharise pursed her lips. "He doesn't want babies with you?"
I shook my head. "No. I don't want babies with him." Noticing them both shift uncomfortably, I rolled my eyes and headed through the glass doors, grabbed a glass of whiskey from the waiter's tray, and made my way over to our table.
"You don't want kids with him?" Sharise asked as she caught me up and I looked at her over my shoulder, shaking my head again. "Why not? You'd make a great mom!"
"Nikki and I have enough trouble with looking after ourselves. Having a child together would just be plain cruel."
"So you're never gonna have them?"
"Maybe not never" I sighed, stopping before I got close enough that he would've heard the conversation "but definitely not anytime in the near future."
"Nikki wants kids with you" Heather added "you can just see it. He really wants to be a dad."
"Well, I don't want to be a mom. Not yet."
Heather and Sharise were both dead set on becoming mothers one day and they just thought that because Nikki and I seemed to be solid, that we would be already planning our little family together.
But things don't always go as expected, and I don't think that Nikki or myself were truly prepared for what that year was going to bring us.
"We've already set a date" Tommy nodded in agreement with Heather as Nikki rolled his eyes. "May 10th of this year. I'm so excited!"
"Me too, I'm so fuckin' ready to make you my wife, baby" he kissed the side of her head and I swooned.
Nikki excused himself from the table as everyone started to get lost in conversation with the happy couple, and I couldn't help but wonder what had gotten into him. Again.
"I'm sorry" I stated softly as I sat next to him at the bar. "I shouldn't have said that because I knew that was gonna hurt you."
"It didn't hurt me, Christine. It pissed me off because you made it pretty clear to me that you're never gonna want kids with me" he picked up his wine glass and shrugged before taking it back in one long sip.
"But I didn't say never..."
"You said you didn't want children with me and you said that if you got pregnant you'd get an abortion" I raised my brows because Beth was the only person I'd told that to "just make up your mind because one minute you're all anti-baby and pro abortion, and the next you're telling me that you wouldn't mind me putting a fucking kid in you."
I furrowed my brows. I never really thought about how badly he wanted to be a father.
"It was a joke, Nikki...maybe I'll change my mind one day, but we're both addicts, we both have other priorities right now. You're making music, traveling all over the world, having a great time, and I want to go back to college to make something of myself" I frowned when he just rolled his eyes. "I love you and I'm just saying that if it happens, it happens and we're just gonna have to deal with it. But I don't want to plan anything right now."
"Yeah, whatever" he spat before pulling a carton of cigarettes from his jacket, cutting me off with another scoff as he got off the stool and stormed to the door.
"What an asshole..."
I shrugged it off and made my way back to the table, painting on the fakest smile I possibly could've mustered up.
"Vince...." Sharise warned and stared the blonde out as I sat down next to Heather, elbowing her a little to try to discreetly ask what was going on.
"Babe I'm sorry but you know that I did that shit when I was with Beth" he shrugged and I rolled my eyes because I knew exactly what he was referring to. "It doesn't mean I'm gonna do it when I'm with you!"
"Who's to say that though? You had a fucking child with that woman and you still--" she slurred, hiccuping a few times "--you still cheated on her!!"
"I think she's had enough..." Heather stated softly, giggling, before getting up and heading to the other side of the table. "Come on Sharise" she said to the blonde whose eyes were starting to fill up "Chris and I will take you back."
"We will?" I asked.
"Yep. We need some girl on girl time I think" she looked down to Sharise with a slight frown.
"Girl on girl time--"
"--shut up, Tommy" we both said in unison.
"Nina?" I glanced to her, smiling "did you wanna come back with us too?"
She put a hand to Mick's shoulder, shaking her head, and reciprocated my smile straight back to me. "It's alright, sweetie. If you don't mind, I'll stay here."
I just let out a soft 'alright' before helping Heather with Sharise's things as she was pulling the very tipsy blonde to her feet. Tommy and Vince both sent me a look with brows raised, and I was about to let them know that Nikki had just stormed out, before he was wobbling back through the doors.
His emerald eyes were pinned out, shirt rolled up and belt left unbuckled. My heart dropped at the sight of the smug grin that was slapped on his face.
"Going already, darling?" he asked in a condescending tone.
I nodded and swallowed the lump in my throat.
"That's a shame. I was hoping that you were gonna stay with me tonight and make me feel bad for being a prick to you, but then turn around and make some sick joke about something you know that I really want. Oh well, I guess there's tomorrow" he let out bitterly, smirking at the guys as they all sent him variations of the same confused look.
"Nikki, I said that I was sorry. You know that I didn't mean for that to come out the way it did" I tried to reason with him, slinging Sharise's purse over my shoulder.
He ignored me and I felt anger start to bubble out of me.
"You know....I felt really fucking bad about slipping up that way because Sharise and Heather both said about how you really want to be a dad someday, and how they think I'd make a great mom" Vince slowly closed his eyes because he remembered that whole conversation. "It got me thinking. If I got pregnant right now, I would be fucking heartbroken--but for the kid, not because I don't want to have a child with you, Nikki."
"Why? Because you've used the whole 'we're addicts' thing too many times."
"But we are!!" I whisper yelled because I was starting to get mindful that we were in a restaurant full of innocent onlookers. "Not only that but neither one of us know how to look after a baby, neither one of us has ever shown even an ounce of interest in having kids besides that one fucking argument we had! If we had a kid right now, it would be so fucked up!!"
"Alright. Whatever" he told me, trying to wave me off.
"You already used that line today."
"And, both times, I meant it" he growled "just fucking take Sharise back. I'll see you later."
I rubbed at my eyes and nodded. "Fine, bye."
"Leave the door unlocked for me."
"No" I quickly fished around for the room key and threw it at him, shaking my head "I'm staying with the girls tonight so you three might need some place to go."
"What?! Heather--"
She shrugged, smirking at me before looking down at Sharise's more than messy state. "Chris is right. We're gonna need to stay with her to make sure she'll be alright while you're out."
And with that, the two of us took the blonde on each arm, and helped her out of the restaurant and back to the car.
Once we pulled up at the hotel, Doc's face was absolutely priceless. He stood at the reception desk, shaking his head, erratically tapping his foot against the gray carpet with such anger, I was surprised he didn't start to fume.
"Where are the boys?"
"'The boys' are being pricks to us tonight, so we've left them out, and opted for a girls night in instead" I looked to the clock and squinted "it's only 10pm so we haven't broken the little curfew you've set out for us, and we're back in one piece."
"You're getting good at this now, Christine. It's only taken you three years" he stated, sarcastically.
I pursed my lips and widened my eyes, nodding a little because if I had spoken, I probably would've gotten myself into trouble which meant that Nikki also would've been in deep shit when he got back.
I really did feel like I was getting somewhere with Doc--apparently not. Honestly, I hadn't a clue why he hated me as much as he did, and I don't really understand where he found the energy to hate me with such ferocity, but he did.
After we got back to Sharise's room, she, Heather and myself decided to just call it a night and watch a few movies together until we crashed. Stupidly, I'd given Nikki our room key which meant that I couldn't get all that I needed--vis-à-vis heroin and cocaine--so I had to traipse down to the lobby to get another key.
"Did you get one?" Heather asked softly as I did my best at quietly shutting the door.
"Yeah, I'm gonna head back in a little bit. I think I heard them come in a few minutes ago so I'll give Nikki a half hour to shoot up, do whatever it is that he does, fall asleep, and then I'll go back to him."
I headed over to the vanity, grabbed the bottle of wine and two glasses sat next to it, and gestured for her to join me on the balcony.
"Shit..." I muttered to myself as the piercingly cold air hit me right in the face when I opened the door, quickly motioning for Heather to throw me one of the blankets that was at the bottom of the closet.
She headed out, wrapped up in the fleece throw, and plopped herself down in front of me as I stared into the distance with my glass of wine, trying my hardest to just absorb the beautiful little city in Hesse.
Germany was always on my bucket list.
"God, he is loud" Heather stated as we both heard Nikki groaning on the other side of the balcony, before the doors were opening and he trudged on out.
Her eyes widened and I just smiled, ignoring him, leaning backwards in my seat.
"Christine" came timidly over the dividing wall. "Baby...I'm sorry."
"There it is" I mouthed to Heather, knowing full well that the only reason he was saying sorry was because he wanted to get jacked up and, obviously, the guys didn't want to do it with him. But that was good enough for me.
"I'll be over in a little while" I got up, heading to the other side of the balcony. "Save some for me?" I pointed to the Jack Daniels over the wall, noticing him smirk a little.
"You want some of this too?" he shook a little baggy in the air and I nodded. "Alright. I'll wait for you."
"Thank you" my eyes fluttered closed when he leaned over a bit to peck my lips. I pulled away with a hum, biting the inside of my cheek. "I'm sorry too."
He just smiled. "I know you are, Chris."
I let him get back to what he was doing and he closed the balcony door, leading me to believe that he was probably going to get high without me because he knew I'd spend a little too long with Heather.
"You two are ridiculously cute together" she breathed out before taking a sip of her wine. "Like...it makes me sick."
"It makes you sick?" I asked in a laugh and she playfully rolled her eyes.
"I know you both argue and you have your issues and shit, but you two are perfect together. I think you really found your soulmate."
"You really think so?" Heather nodded. "I don't know. Sometimes I feel like we just don't work, like we hide so much from one another it isn't normal."
"What couple doesn't have the occasional little white lie here and there? I've hidden plenty from Tommy and we haven't even been together all that long."
I made sure that Nikki wasn't still outside, and that the door was shut, before scooting closer to Heather.
"You know what I meant. I'm hiding what happened between Tommy and I."
"Yeah, I know. But what else did you mean? Is he hiding something from you?"
"Well, I'm speculating" I felt my heart start to hammer against my chest and my throat began to dry up, nervousness washing over me.
Heather raised a brow and urged for me to continue.
"Who is Vanity?" she went to speak but I cut her off "scratch that actually, I know who she is. What I meant is, what is she doing hanging around the band? I've seen her at least eight times since Christmas Day, Heather, and I still don't know a single thing about her besides the fact she brings heroin for Nikki when I'm not there and she's always in my closet with him when I get home."
"Nikki still hasn't introduced you?" I shook my head.
"No, he hasn't. I got high with her one time before we left for tour, but she didn't even tell me why the hell she was even in my house" tears of frustration welled in my eyes "what if...no...no. I trust Nikki."
"What if what, Christine?"
I let out a deep breath. I couldn't believe what I was about to say.
"What if...you know...what if she's been hanging around because she thinks that Nikki will want to sleep with her? I mean, she tried it with Vince--at least that's what Tommy told me anyways."
"Even if she did want to sleep with him, would he even want to sleep with her?" she questioned and I just shrugged, pouring another glass of wine. "She's smokin' and I totally see why people are attracted to her, but he is in love with you, Chris. Would he really jeopardize that?"
"I know that he fucks groupies" I let out flatly and she shook her head in disappointment, I guess. "I know that he has sex with other women when I'm not around and I know that he has no plans to stop. But I can't say shit because I slept with his best fucking friend, twice, so I need to pretend like it doesn't bother me when in reality it is really fucking painful to think about."
Those damn tears of frustration bubbled out until I could feel the droplets land against my cheek, roll down to my neck and onto the soft blanket I had wrapped around my body.
I sighed out, putting my glass down, not wanting to think about that anymore.
"I'm gonna head to bed now. I'll see you tomorrow Heather" she nodded as I excused myself from our little table and traipsed through the bedroom.
Talking to Nikki seemed like a good idea until I walked in on him shooting up and decided that I wanted in too. Then one thing lead to another and in minutes I was underneath him, on top of him, and underneath him again as he was determined to fuck my brains out as a way of apologizing for what had happened.
Naturally, we both woke up much too late and to the sound of Doc pounding on our door because I had to take part in an interview with my darling husband--who I was struggling to even want to be in the same room as.
When we actually came around and had to get a cab to wherever it was that we were being filmed, I brought up the whole 'who is Vanity' thing in front of Tommy and Heather, and Nikki flipped out. He said that she was just someone that he liked to get high with and when I questioned him further, he simply said "I get high with Vanity because you're never home anymore and, even when you are, you're saying that you're trying to quit smack. She's just there."
"She's just there"...."she's just there"....she was Always. Fucking. There.
"If you bitch to me one more fucking time about that woman then Chris, I'm gonna flip out--"
"--I wouldn't have to bitch about her if you actually told me the damn truth!!" I barked, stepping out of the cab. "You fucked up that interview because you were mad at me, Doc noticed, I noticed, the fucking interviewer noticed! I'm sorry for bringing her up but you're my husband and you're hanging around with an attractive woman--I am sorry for feeling threatened by her!"
"You don't feel threatened by her, you're jealous" I gasped, shaking my head. "Don't! You know that you are Christine. You can't handle the thought of me spending time with anyone who isn't you because you get sad and feel like I'm about to abandon you when I am absolutely not because you're my wife!!--and that's where your mommy and daddy issues start to come into fucking play!"
"Shut up!!" I yelled, my hands shaking.
"Christine, you have not got anything to worry about, I really don't know why you're so mad at me over this!"
"Seriously?" he shrugged "so you were allowed to get mad at me for spending time with Tommy, knowing full well I was with him to get Vince from fucking rehab, but I'm not even allowed to ask about that woman who's always in my house, in my fucking BEDROOM?! Are you fucking serious right now?!!"
"There's no use in talking to you when you're drunk" he pushed past me to open the hotel room door, but I caught up to him again.
"I am not drunk! And maybe if you stop walking away from me in arguments I wouldn't be getting so heated" I growled.
It felt like fucking déjà vu when I took off my heels and launched them across the room, that time I actually caught Nikki's arm.
"Fuck you!" I yelled as I began to shake, crying my eyes out. "I can't do this anymore! The lies, the way you avoid talking to me about important arguments and the way you just use sex and heroin to get yourself out of talking to me about shit that we really need to address! Nikki, I am at my limit!!"
"And you think that throwing your fucking shoes at me is gonna help?!" he barked back and grabbed a hold of my arm, but I just let him because I was too weak from crying my eyes out to even begin to think about pulling myself away. "Lies? What fucking lies, Christine? I'm not lying to you!"
"You are!! I know that you are, Nikki!"
"What the hell are you talking about Christine--"
"--I know that you're screwing groupies behind my back!" he let go of my hand, his mouth opened slowly before he tried to speak but nothing came out. "And I know that you're probably having sex with all of these women while I'm at home, or I'm in these hotel rooms on my own, getting jacked up because I'm in way too deep with this little heroin addiction that I've got going on, and you say that you care but you don't because all I am to you is a drug buddy and a fucking cum rag!"
"I do care" he stated calmly, not even trying to deny the groupie thing.
"No you don't! If you cared, you'd want me to stop or you'd want to try and stop using yourself to encourage me!! You're bringing Vanity around who enables it, you're bringing Robbin around who literally sits there and watches me get jacked up....sometimes I wonder if we should even be together because all we're doing is hurting one another and allowing people to hurt us."
Nikki turned his back on me and started to pace the room as I began to dig deeper.
"Heather said that she thinks we're perfect for one another, but I think that's just bullshit."
"You really don't think that we should be with one another?" he asked, confused, though his tone laced with fury.
"No. I don't."
"Why don't you just leave me if you feel so fucking strongly about it?"
"Because I love you!! And I don't want anything to happen to you, Nikki! But in turn, I'm destroying myself and I'm scared that I'm going to end up like my mother."
I noticed the way that hurt started to wash over him because I made it seem as though he was like my father. He was nothing like that monster.
"I didn't mean that...I'm just scared that--"
"--you don't need to explain yourself, I know what you were trying to say."
He sounded so hurt. I felt awful.
"I'm sorry."
Two words that Nikki and myself seemed to be saying a lot to one another, but only one of us really meant it.
He gestured for me to join him on the bed, and pulled me into him.
"I'm not just saying this because I don't want you to physically castrate me with your bare hands, but you don't have anything to worry about. Vanity isn't anybody you need to feel threatened by, I swear. She just brings me heroin and we get fucked up together--if you wanna, you can with us too. Just to prove that you don't need to be concerned."
My cheek rested against his chest as he traced circles across my back, calming me down because god knows I needed that. "I trust you. I was overreacting because I didn't even know who she was, but now I feel better about it."
He squeezed my shoulder, a small, fake as shit, smile pulled at my lips.
"I will never hurt you like that, Christine. I promise that I will never hurt you the way that you think I will."
"I know, Nikki " I let out, almost confidently "I know."