Chapter 76
The rest of the day was silent. Khushi fought with her own demons, while Arnav fulfilled every wish of hers. He followed her like a shadow and became her silent support. The information he had given her, needed to be processed, but first, Khushi needed to take care of the factory and the workers there. She needed the distraction from everything that she found out and the best way to do so, was, to go to factory and check everything.
The reason why she choose to go to this place, was also, because Arnav should know that there are people who still needed him and the best way to let him know was to show him.
When they entered the building some women came and greeted them. She was amazed how they worked and kept everything tidy, while no one was there to lead them. The women tanked Arnav again for jobs and better work conditions.
Khushi saw how he acted, while all women surrounded him and talked. Arnav didn't answer. He showed how overwhelmed he was with all the praises and thanked everyone. Khushi realized how much he changed during the time without her.
Walking inside the office, Khushi ordered Arnav to take a place on his seat while she sat down on the couch. Her lips curved up remembering how they used to sit on the same places before she left him. It was weird to remember the past without any negative thought but also good to let go of the old poisonous feelings.
Khushi didn't know whether she was ready to let Arnav back inside her heart again. She was scared. Still scared to trust. But she knew, she couldn't leave him alone. He tried to kill himself and she knew if she leaves him alone one more time, he would try it again.
Her phone rang and she saw Mahendra's name was written on it. Khushi has bought the smartphone before she left so that her family could reach her without any problem. Manorama called her every hour or at least rang the phone. Khushi did the same. It was their secret way of communication. Manorama told her to ring whenever she thought of her and it happened that Manorama herself called her a few times in an hour.
It was totally weird that they didn't call or rang the phone in the last twenty-four hours but Khushi was thankful. It seemed her family knew Arnav and her very well, because they gave them time alone, they desperately needed.
Khushi smiled by picking up the phone.
>>Papa?<<
>>Hello, beta. How are you?<<
>>I am fine, papa. How are you?<<
Arnav looked up to see Khushi. He smiled and she saw how happy he was to hear the word papa from her.
>>I am fine, beta. We miss you. Is everything okay in Delhi?<<
Khushi wanted to tell them that everything was fine, but she was still not sure how the things would work out. She kept her statement short, so that her papa would think that everything was okay and would calm down.
>>Everything is okay, papa. How is Maa?<<
>>She is fine beta. A little concerned, but fine. Khushi do you need us in Delhi?<<
She wanted so badly to have them here, but Khushi needed some time alone with Arnav before she decide what she wanted. She will not hurry herself and her feelings. It was important to clear everything out, before she continues with her life.
>>No, Papa. It's okay. I am fine and I just need some time here.<<
>>Okay, beta. Call us when you need something. We are here. Don't hesitate to call me or your mother.<<
>>I will, papa.<<
>>Bye beta.<<
>>Bye.<<
The silence was back and they continued working. Arnav neither said anything to her about her conversation on the phone, nor asked any question. During the time Khushi was with him in the office, she remarked how much work was left. It seemed Arnav wasn't there for a while to take care of things and other workers couldn't do it without him.
She often shook her head in disbelief, how much Arnav changed, from being a strict businessman to a person who was disinterested in life. His eyes often were on her and it seemed he was waiting for something to happen.
The day went on and finally when all workers left, Arnav and Khushi decided to go home too. Khushi has already had a nap on the couch in his office, but still there was nothing like sleeping in her own bed.
Khushi smiled when she thought of calling the bed in the condo as her own bed.
When they finally came to the door and ate the food that they bought on the way home, they decided to watch TV. Deeply blushing, Khushi sat next to Arnav and thought on the time where she tried to seduce him.
Arnav checked the program for some Bollywood movie and leaned back on the backseat. She knew he did that for her. He could also watch sport or news, but he decided to watch a simple Bollywood movie of Shah Rukh Khan. Khushi wished it was Salman Khan's movie, but she was also okay watching SRK. Still, even the situation was relaxing, she couldn't concentrate on the movie because so many questions crossed her head.
Turning to Arnav, she remarked that his hands were shaking and she decided to ask straight.
>>Are you freezing?<<
>>Why are you asking?<<
>>Because your hands are shaking.<<
>>Oh.<<
He looked down.
>>That is nothing. Nothing to worry about.<<
>>Stop pretending Arnav. Tell me what's wrong. Should I call the doctor? You just came out from hospital. Don't expect me to be calm after all this.<<
Arnav sighed.
>>My body wants alcohol. That's why, my hands are shaking. It sometimes comes back as a reaction. I guess it's a normal body reaction after consuming excessive alcohol.<<
Khushi saw how dark Arnav's face became. How sad and lost he was. There was this strange feeling inside her heart that he could try again to kill himself.
Maybe she was wrong but maybe she was right in her assumption.
He looked like someone who craved death and this scared her to the core.
>>Why are you here Khushi?<<
His question brought her back from thoughts.
>>I am here because I wanted to be here and because my dreams showed me something I am afraid of.<<
He suddenly seemed distracted from his dark thoughts and his eyes shined.
>>Dreams? Tell me about it.<<
>>No.<<
Khushi shook her head.
>>First, I want to know about you more. Tell me about your childhood. About your family.<<
She didn't know why, but she leaned to him and placed her head on his shoulder. Mentioning her dreams scared her again and this time she knew why.
>>What is there to tell? I am the youngest and only son of my parents. My actual surname was Malik, but I refused to use it. My sister refused the name too, so we used our mothers surname.<<
>>Why?<<
>>Because my father was not like what you imagine one father should be.<<
>>Like Mr. Gupta?<<
Khushi called Shashi intentionally as Mr. Gupta. It helped always to get the distance and remove the upcoming pain in the heart that threatened to shatter everything.
>>No, he was good to us, but he was a useless husband. Cheating on his wife with maids.<<
He continued to tell about his childhood and some stories about him and Anjali. They were quite funny and Khushi found herself smiling very often.
Her head leaned down and down and her pregnancy finally forced her to sleep. Her body and mind were totally exhausted. Before she felt asleep, she asked the last question on her mind.
>>What actually happen to your mother?<<
Arnav touched her face softly and spoke with a broken voice.
>>Just like yours, I destroyed her life as well. I did a big mistake by telling her the painful truth which led her to commit suicide. She left my sister and me, because I couldn't shut my mouth. This was my first lesson of not talking too much. I tried to keep it, when I saw you with Shiyam. I was so afraid that my sister would have to face the same destiny like our mother. I wanted to see her happy and safe, and for that, I was ready to destroy your life.<<
Khushi started falling into her dreams even though, she wanted to listen to him. He said so many important things, shared so many information that she started to understand him and his motives. The last sentences were still in her head when she went to the dreamland.
>>You see Khushi, I am wrong for you. Whatever I do or say, I just destroy everyone's life. You should run Khushi and never look back again. I am not worthy of your time and love. I am not worthy of anything you offer. I deserve whatever comes to me and I especially deserve punishment for what I did to you. You should forget me.<<
*
Forget me.
Forget me.
Forget me.
She opened her eyes and found herself back on the cliff.
She didn't waste too much time and run towards it, to see the ocean. She thought she would see changes but no, nothing was different. The ocean was farther away from the cliff now. The fishes were still fighting for life, but she could see that they were slowly losing the fight.
As soon as the thought of jumping into the ocean crossed her mind, the old woman appeared next to her.
Khushi saw a big smile on the old woman's face and was amazed when the woman spoke.
>>Finally. You are back and I see you took your decision.<<
Khushi nodded. She knew what the woman meant and she knew the old woman was right. She was here to do it. To do what her heart tells her to do. Her head turned around to the ocean and she walked one step.
>>But he is so far away.<<
>>Call him and he will come for you. He will always protect you.<<
The old woman spoke behind her.
Khushi opened her mouth and called him.
>>Arnav!<<
The ocean turned louder as if it heard her calls.
>>Arrnaav!<<
The waves were getting stronger and stronger. The water came back and with a speed that left Khushi wondering. She looked down and saw how the water hugged all fishes. They swam fast through the water into the deepness, as they were happy to finally get some relief.
Khushi didn't need to see any more. She turned around and hugged the old woman. Her eyes filled with tears even though, she was happy. Khushi knew this was the last time she would see her .
>>Thank you.<<
Came out as a whisper, before she walked back to the cliff and jumped into the ocean. The water hugged Khushi and pulled her deeper, giving her protection. She didn't expect this. She didn't expect to feel loved and cherished. She didn't expect the water to be so warm and inviting.
She knew, she was finally home. The real home. The home where her soul will finally find peace.
*
Khushi opened her eyes and found herself on the couch. It was still dark, but Arnav was nowhere to be seen. She looked downstairs, but he wasn't there too. She checked all the rooms upstairs. Then, she found him, of course in his bedroom, changing his clothes after taking the shower.
She knew it, because his back was still full of drops when she walked behind him.
Arnav didn't remark her presence, until she touched his tattoo.
>>Why did you write my name on your back?<<
He didn't turn around. He dropped the towel to the floor.
>>Because I am yours.<<
Silence hung between them, until Arnav finally spoke again.
>>When are you leaving Khushi? I don't want you to leave. Don't understand me wrong. I just want to know. You know, to prepare myself.<<
Khushi's fingertips were still tracing Arnav's tattoo. She wanted to kiss her letters on his back. Maybe even lick the drops away from his painted skin.
>>I don't know. It depends.<<
>>On what? Khushi, please tell me so I can prepare myself. You don't know what it will do to me. Only thinking it, is enough to bring myself to take a knife and...<<
He didn't complete the sentence.
Khushi turned him around and pushed him to the bed using her full strength.
She leaned down towards Arnav and pressed her palm on his mouth.
>>Don't you dare to say it in front of my son! I know he can hear you. So don't you dare Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada.<<
She did it intentionally. She gave Arnav his name back. Last time she did it, he was in hospital and weak. He didn't even remark how she called him by his full name. Now it was time to make him listen to her words and realize what's happening.
Khushi leaned closer to lock her eyes with Arnav's. To look deeper and underline her words. There was a reason why she said it. There was a reason why she came to him after her dream. There was a reason why she jumped into the ocean.
She sat on Arnav's lap. Her belly between them, she kissed him on the lips.
>>I forgive you. I forgive you, Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada and do you want to know why?<<
His eyes widened and then, he asked.
>>Why?<<
>>Because you are mine.
>>You are my hope and my punishment. You are my worst nightmare and my biggest dream. You are the reason why I died and why I am alive today again.<<
>>You are my heartless Prince.<<
>>Heartless, because you hurt me like no one ever did before and prince because you put piece by piece back and repaired me. You made me feel like your princess. You made me feel special. Cherished. Loved.<<
She kissed him again.
>>You have once told to that girl that I was your owner. And you know what, Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada.<<
>>I am. And I am taking back, what is legally mine.<<
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