•Part 32•
Monday morning was difficult. I still wasn't fully myself after Saturday. Let's just say, after the chat with Liam I had gotten slightly crazy with the drinks.
"Are you okay?" Poppy asked with a laugh as she walked into our form class. I didn't reply, just nodded. "How much did you drink?"
"Not much to start off with." I told her.
"But?"
"But then I had a conversation with Liam and it kind of went downhill."
"Seriously?" She sounded disappointed. "You guys argued at your cousins wedding--"
"No no no." I stopped her. "It wasn't an argument."
Poppy straightened up at looked at me slightly confused. "It wasn't?"
I shook my head. "He apologised for everything and it just fvcked with my mind so I turned to drinks."
"As you do." She laughed. "How good did he look?"
I looked at her trying to bite back a smile. "Too good."
"Better than Sean?"
I nodded shamefully.
"Ouch." She winced mockingly. "Okay, so I guess that's an excuse to drink."
I nodded with a grin. My best friend always had a way of thinking of excuses for my irrational behaviour.
A message interrupted the split second of silence between us.
From: Sean
Hey Luce, I'm not in school cos I don't have any lessons, but I'd like to see you today. Would that be alright?
"Who's that from?" Poppy asked.
"Sean." I told her, replying with a yes.
"Is loverboy texting to tell you he misses you?" She teased.
I rolled my eyes. "He's asking to see me after school."
From: Sean
So I'll see you at 1 at Pencey's?
Once again I replied with a yes.
"So it's a date?" Poppy asked.
I shook my head. "No Poppy."
"Yeah it is."
I laughed. "It really isn't."
"We'll see." She grinned.
I nodded. "We shall."
///////
I couldn't help but feel anxious when seeing Sean. Maybe Poppy was right, maybe Sean cared more than I thought. In case this was actually going to be a date, I decided to drop home and change into something slightly more appealing. I chose a brown and orange sleeveless Aztec printed cami top, a pair of black skinny jeans and kept on my dark brown suede peep toe heeled boots with a fringe trim around the ankle.
The outfit was formal enough for a date but also casual enough incase it wasn't one.
I arrived at Pencey's in no time. Sean was already at the table when I arrived.
"You look amazing as always." He kissed me on my cheek as I took my place.
"Thank you." I smiled, nervously.
"So," he said, rubbing his hands together.
"So." I nodded.
"You might be wondering why I have invited you out."
"Actually I've been wondering all day." I told him.
"Well, I don't know how to say it, and now I'm kind of regretting doing this in such a formal manor." He laughed nervously. "I've been thinking about this a lot recently, I guess, I just can't really get it out of my head, because every time I see you it just comes back instantly."
"What is it?" I asked anxiously.
He bit back a smile. "My feelings for you."
The words surprised me. I did not see this coming. I found my jaw hanging lower slightly and I couldn't pick it back up. I had never looked at Sean in any other way than just a friend. I mean, I could deny that he was attractive, funny, smart and athletic but I just never expected anything more from him than friendship. Considering that Sean had been in a very serious long-term relationship not long ago, him having any feelings for me was a shock.
"Sean, I don't know--"
"It's okay if you don't feel it too Luce." He smiled. "I don't expect you to, I just couldn't keep it to myself any longer and I couldn't exactly tell my mates now could I?"
All I could think of was how would Liam react if he knew? Would he be angry? Or would he not care? I was completely confused on what Liam actually felt towards me. Whenever Liam told me how he felt I never fully believed it, but deep inside I wanted it to be true.
"No I guess not." I smiled, focusing my attention back at Sean.
"I hope this doesnt ruin our friendship." He smiled slightly.
I shook my head. "Oh god no. No Sean this would never ruin our friendship."
The smile grew bigger. "Thank you."
///////
We walked around a lot after our meal together. We talked a lot too. We talked about our friendship but also if anything more was on the cards. The more I thought about it, the more I thought of Liam. How he hurt me and never appreciated me. Then my thoughts would drift to Sean, and how he was the complete opposite. He liked spending time with me, he didn't mind being seen around me, he reached out to me, he liked me.
Maybe Sean would be a nice change in my life. He was an amazing friend but there was obviously something more between us, even if I didn't see it just yet. Maybe I just had to give it a chance.
When it got dark, Sean followed me home in his own car. He insisted on dropping me home as considering both of us came in two different cars, that's how we had to get home. I let him walk me from our cars to my front door where we stood and stared at each other for a while.
"Thanks for today." I smiled.
"You know it was my pleasure." He smirked.
I nodded. "I should probably get inside--" my eyes popped as Sean pressed his lips unexpectedly to mine. I didn't move away though, instead, I shut my eyes and kissed him back. He was a good kisser, deep but gentle. And yet, I couldn't help but think about what I felt when I first kissed Liam. How my heart stopped beating, how I stopped breathing, how the butterflies erupted in my stomach, the spark that went through my body when he touched me even the slightest bit. I didn't feel any of that with Sean, but I told myself that maybe I just needed to give it time.
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http://www.polyvore.com/lets_go_out/set?id=126644844&lid=3706920