MADNESS
— 18. Severed Bonds
At King Harald's Great Hall, Ivar was sitting in the main room with Bishop Heahmund, playing a game of chest. "We will be fighting against your brothers," Heahmund spoke up in a calm tone, "Yes?"
"Yes," Ivar replied, taking a sip of his mead, "Perhaps even my brother Bjorn and his wife Ylva, if they return from their travels."
"Do they frighten you, your brothers?" Heahmund asked Ivar curiously.
Ivar laughed, immediately shaking his head. "No. Maybe Bjorn, just a little," He admitted in a calm tone, "I don't find him very smart, but he is a great warrior. They call him Bjorn Ironside."
Ivar chuckled softly, a smile appearing on his lips. "But his wife. Now, that is someone to fear," He commented as Hvitserk and Freya lifted their heads while they sat at another part of the room, "Even I know that. She has a ferocity in battle like no other. She is not called the she-wolf for nothing. She fought in her first battle at eleven years old, raised an army at twelve, and overthrew her father at thirteen, becoming Earl in her own right despite having two older brothers. She trained with my father for ten months as well at the age of ten. After that, she lived all across Norway, gaining knowledge from some of the greatest warriors in this land. In the process, she raised an army that no one would believe a girl of twelve could be able to raise. She went from home to home in Ashton, slaughtering anyone who refused to kneel to her, their families too. She spared the children, though, selling them as slaves instead. And do you want to know how she killed her father?"
Heahmund was silent for a long moment, uneasily nodding his head as a way to tell Ivar to continue.
Ivar smiled, turning to glance at Freya before back at Heahmund. "She starved him for a week, feeding him nothing but dirty water and stale bread for two weeks after that. When he was nothing but skin and bones, she had him flayed. She strung him up on the walls of the great city of Ashton after that, letting the ravens and flies eat what was left of him. She did all of this at thirteen and more. Even I know it would be foolish of me not to fear someone like her. While my brother is a good warrior, Ylva is not just a great warrior, but one of the smartest people I have ever met. She is not someone to make an enemy out of. My mother taught me that. As long as she is left breathing, she will always be a problem."
Freya sighed as she listened to Ivar. She sighed, turning to look at Hvitserk as she tried to hide her uneasiness.
____
It was nighttime and Hvitserk was laying in bed. He was on the verge of falling asleep when he heard footsteps. He turned, only to frown as he watched Freya enter.
"Freya," He frowned as he sat up from his lying position, "What are you doing here?"
"I couldn't bear being alone," Freya admitted softly with a disappointed look on her face, "I've been unable to sleep these past few days. I was wondering..." She sighed, moving closer to Hvitserk, "I was wondering if I could lay with you tonight."
"Lay?" Hvitserk questioned, raising a brow at the girl.
"I don't want to have sex with you, I just want to lay with you. To feel your touch," She admitted as she shrugged her shoulders, "It brings comfort that I can't seem to find anywhere else," She whispered as she smiled softly, "Makes me feel safe."
Hvitserk stared at Freya closely for a moment in silence. He sighed, moving over slightly before he lifted the fur blankets.
Freya took a deep breath and moved closer to her. She laid down on the bed next to him and Hvitserk wasted no time wrapping an arm around her. Feeling safe in his arms, Freya smiled softly and closed her eyes, the two of them slowly drifting off to sleep.
Hours had passed and the duo was still fast asleep in each other's arms. Hearing a noise, Hvitserk opened his eyes. Freya was holding onto his hand, but he knew that wasn't it.
Feeling the bed dip next to him, he lifted his knife and jolted up, his eyes widening when he found Ivar sitting there.
"Sorry to startle you, but you are in bed with my woman," Ivar complained and Hvitserk sighed in frustration as he laid back down.
Both men turned their heads to see that Freya looked to still be asleep, which was a surprise to them both. She always had been a light sleeper, after all.
"She's not your woman. How many times must I say that you cannot claim her because she is a free woman and not your wife?" Hvitserk complained as he shot his brother an aggravated look.
"Need I remind you, she will be my wife when we take Kattegat and Ashton," Ivar argued as he began to smile at Hvitserk, "You know, I've been thinking about you, my dear brother."
"What have you been thinking?" Hvitserk replied, smiling sarcastically at Ivar.
"You are very fond of Freya, more than I once thought. More than our brothers ever were, even Ubbe. For years I have watched you all pass her around to each other like she was some slave you could hump whenever you pleased. You all shared her. I do not wish to share her," Ivar explained without a care in the world, earning a glare from Hvitserk.
"That is not your decision to make. She is her own person and if she wants to have us both, then she shall have us both," Hvitserk retorted and Ivar smiled at him threateningly.
"You know, it would be a pity if I had to burn her," Ivar suddenly retorted, earning a hateful glare from Ivar.
He picked up his knife and held it to Ivar's throat in a threatening manner. "You wouldn't do that, brother," He demanded in a low tone, "Now would you?"
Not intimidated by Hvitserk, Ivar began to smile as he shook his head. "You're right. I wouldn't. She means too much to me. But I could easily send you away so that you never see her again," He demanded in a stern tone and Hvitserk remained silent, not answering Ivar, "You wouldn't want that now, would you? You can't bear to leave her with me alone. You care for her too much."
As she laid with her back facing them, Freya opened her eyes, trying to hide her uneasiness as she continued to listen to Ivar threaten Hvitserk. Ivar was growing more and more possessive of her as each day passed. It would not end well.
_____
As everyone prepared for battle, Freya and Hvitserk were standing on the boat together when Ivar crawled over to them. "It's time," He announced to Freya and his brother, "How I've been impatient. Now, I can finally fulfill my promise to the gods, and kill Lagertha."
Hvitserk stepped forward, assisting Ivar with getting onto the boat. "I'm ready to avenge our mother," He spoke up, but Freya felt as though his words were only being said to convince himself that what he was doing was right, "Not because she was a good mother to me, but because Lagertha deserves it."
Freya sighed and shook her head, realizing that Hvitserk, in truth, did not know why he was there. He was unsure about himself and where he stood in the war. He wasn't the only one, but Freya would never admit that.
"That's good enough to me," Ivar replied, smiling for a moment. However, it soon faded and he stared up at Hvitserk with a suspicious look on his face, "But are you ready to deal with Ubbe? Will you kill him if you have to, even if he is your own flesh and blood?"
Hvitserk avoided eye contact with Ivar for a long moment until he finally turned to look his younger brother in the eyes. "If I kill Ubbe, won't my fame be assured?" He remarked as he walked away.
Ivar watched his brother, beginning to laugh in amusement. "That's the way to talk."
There was a moment of silence before Ivar turned to Freya, who seemed to be in deep thought. "What about you?" He asked, causing Freya to snap herself out of her thoughts and turn to him, "Are you ready to fight against your mother and kill her?"
"Of course, I am," She managed to say as she forced a smile onto her face, "I'm here, aren't I?"
She stood up and walked to another part of the boat. As her back faced Ivar, her smile faded, and genuine tears formed in her eyes.
Hvitserk noticed the look in her eyes and gave her a concerned frown, only to have her avoid eye contact with him.
____
On the battlefield, Freya sat on her horse. She looked ahead, trying to maintain composure as she laid eyes on her mother. She was next to Bjorn and near them were their three eldest children. Gyda, Rorik, and Halig. She knew if it came down to it, she'd be able to kill Gyda. Perhaps even Rorik. Though she didn't know about Halig.
Halig was barely even thirteen. It was custom for their mother's family to bring children as young as him into battle, but the fact that he was a child was not why she felt as though she couldn't kill him.
He was the only one of their siblings who didn't view her to be a monster growing up. She was fond of him. She didn't feel the same way about the rest of her other siblings. She wondered if he still wore Thor's hammer necklace that she had given him years ago, before the entire war started.
Just then, she watched as Bjorn and Halfdan rode forward, clearly acting as emissaries. Ivar looked directly at Hvitserk and Harald, gesturing for them to ride forward, which they ended up doing.
After a bit of conversation, Halfdan ended up returning with Harald to their camp with Harald while Hvitserk returned with Bjorn to Lagertha's.
_____
Upon returning to camp, Freya sat underneath a tent with Ivar, Halfdan, Harald, and Astrid. Bishop Heahmund stood near them, eying them all closely.
"This is madness," Halfdan sighed in frustration as he stared at Heahmund.
"Is it?" Harald retorted with an attitude as Halfdan turned to look his brother in the eyes, "You are here where you belong. Don't deny it. Why would you fight for Lagertha, Bjorn, or Ylva? They are not your folk."
Halfdan leaned closer to his brother, a serious look on his face. "Bjorn and Ylva saved my life. Isn't that reason enough?"
"Not really," Ivar suddenly spoke up, causing Freya to lift her head to look at Ivar, "We all choose to live a dangerous life. That is part of our way. So I think that you give what happened between you, Ylva, and Bjorn too much importance."
"Family has a greater claim," Harald told Halfdan, causing Freya to scoff, "I don't want to fight against you. I don't want to have to kill you. The world would make no sense."
"I suppose none of this makes any sense to him anyway," Halfdan changed the subject as he gestured toward Heahmund.
"He's a great warrior," Ivar argued in a stern tone, "He doesn't need anything to make sense."
"By the gods, Ivar, you are just so cynical," Halfdan complained, causing Ivar to chuckle evilly, "You just don't care, do you?"
There was a moment before Halfdan turned to look at Freya. "What about you, Freya?" He suddenly called out, causing Freya to lift her head to look him in the eyes, "Don't you care that you're fighting against your own mother, the one who took you in and made you what you are today?"
"I care..." She trailed off, forcing a sadistic smile onto her face, "About winning this war," She paused, noticing Ivar smiling at her answer, "Halfdan, you have to choose between a friend or a brother. To me, the answer seems obvious."
"I could say the same to you," Halfdan retorted with an attitude, "Yet you have to choose between a mother and a lover."
Hearing Halfdan's words, Freya scoffed loudly and turned to glance at Ivar. "He's not my lover," She grumbled and stood up, just before storming off.
______
The following day, the peace accord occurred. Numerous warriors and shieldmaidens formed a circle around them as they held up flagged spears.
Chairs were placed in the middle. Lagertha, Ylva, Bjorn, Ubbe, Halfdan, Torvi, Sihtric, and Guthrum were on one side. Astrid, Freya, Hvitserk, Ivar, and Harald were on the other.
"We all know today we have so many shield maidens and warriors-at-arms that we must decide whether we fight or we reach an accommodation allowing us to go live our lives with integrity and honor," Bjorn announced loudly to the group before pointing at Hvitserk and Ivar, "I call upon my brothers, Ivar... Hvitserk. Let's put aside our differences, for the sake of our father. A civil war can only bring tragedy, weaken our family, and set in train a lifetime of revenge obligations for those who manage to survive! Is that really what you all want?"
"I want to speak up and support Bjorn, and his call for a peaceful resolution," Ubbe spoke up in a calm tone, "It is true I set my face against my brother. But if you can forgive me, Ivar, let us make an accord."
"We are going to war for the Kingdom of Kattegat," Lagertha spoke up in a stern tone, "The Kingdom of Kattegat was carved out by my husband, Ragnar Lothbrok, and then by me. I am its rightful Queen."
Hearing the woman's words, Freya rolled her eyes and turned to exchange an annoyed look with Ivar.
Lagertha stood up from her seat, beginning to walk around. "What we should be discussing is how we combine our great armies and direct them out towards new lands, new conquests, new opportunities. What a...Terrible pity to kill our young men for a piece of land which is already ours."
There was a long moment of silence and Freya felt her mother's gaze on her, forcing herself to look away. She couldn't bring herself to look her mother in the eyes, knowing it would break her heart.
"Freya!" Ylva suddenly spoke up, causing Freya to force herself to maintain composure as she turned to look directly at her mother, "What, too ashamed of your decision you can't even bear to look me in the eyes?" She asked sternly and Freya remained silent, forcing herself not to look away from her mother, "Believe it or not, I'm happy to see you again. Whatever has happened, I don't want to fight you. You are my daughter, after all, and I love you. More than you could ever know."
Hearing her mother's words, Freya looked down at the ground, trying to contain her shame. "Freya!" Ylva called out to her daughter again.
Freya inhaled sharply, forcing herself to smile as she placed a hand on Ivar's thigh and turned to her mother. "I am to be married now, to Ivar. If we win this war, I shall be Queen of Kattegat," She managed to get out and by her tone of voice, everyone seemed to believe her. And from the looks of it, so did her mother.
Ivar smiled at Freya's words, grabbing her hand before he pressed a kiss to it. Freya tried to stop her hand from trembling, a part of her heart breaking at the sight of her mother's disapproving face.
"Brother, let's not fight," Halfdan suddenly spoke up, causing Freya to turn to look at the man, "What can we gain? Nothing."
"On the contrary. We will gain the world," Harald argued in a calm tone, "Join us and I will share it with you."
"It is really up to you, Ivar," Bjorn spoke up and looked directly at Ivar, who was smiling almost sadistically, "If you decide that you cannot fight against your brothers...That you do not want to fight against your brothers... Then we can find an accord. And King Harald can't stop us," He explained, angrily pointing his finger at Harald before looking back at Ivar.
"You have so much to lose, Ivar," Lagertha commented as she walked to stand directly in front of Ivar, who smiled up at her and showed no fear, "If you want war, then let's have war. But win or lose...You lose."
Lagertha turned away from Ivar and began to walk around, continuing to speak to him. "You gain over the other sons of Ragnar and people will say that you are an illegitimate ruler and a usurper. And if you lose, they will say it was by the will of the gods and the will of Ragnar, who now sups with them in Valhalla, and cries for us now."
"Do not do this, Ivar," Ubbe spoke up in an almost pleading tone, "We are the sons of Ragnar. Is that enough for any man?"
Freya turned her head, watching as Ivar shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He suddenly froze and his eyes filled with sadness as he stood up.
He walked to stand in front of Lagertha with the help of his crutch. "Bring horns of mead. We should celebrate. There will be no battle today. Nor tomorrow," He announced and Freya stared up at him.
She tilted her head slightly and studied himself, realizing what he was doing. He was playing them.
"What are you talking about?" Harald complained as he stood up and moved toward Ivar, "You cannot decide this!"
"I do not want to fight against my brothers," Ivar complained, but Freya could tell he was lying, "I still hate myself for killing Sigurd. This would be ten times worse. I...I can't."
He was silent for a long moment, staring down at the ground. "I renounce my promise to kill Lagertha," Ivar announced and Freya scoffed, rolling her eyes. "She can have Kattegat. I don't want it."
Before making his way over to Ubbe, Ivar turned to Freya. He nodded at her slightly, which was his way of confirming her suspiciously.
She smiled slightly. She had to admit, she was impressed. She watched as he walked until he was trying directly in front of Ubbe.
"Ubbe, you're right," Ivar told his older brother timidly, "We are all the sons of Ragnar. Forgive me."
Ubbe nodded his head and stared up at Ivar in silence.
Moments later, mead was brought to them and Lagertha had been the first to raise her cup and shout. "Skol!"
Freya lifted her mug as everyone took a sip of theirs. Without a care in the world, she poured hers out and she watched as Ivar sent her a small smirk.
Continuing to smirk, Ivar threw the contents of his own cup in Ubbe's face. He turned to look at Freya, who sent him an amused smile while everyone else looked aggravated.
"How blue are my eyes, huh?" Ivar stated angrily as he turned to look at his older brother.
"What?" Ubbe asked, a puzzled look on his face as he wiped the mead from his face.
"How blue are my eyes!" Ivar shouted as he leaned closer to his older brother.
"Your eyes are very blue," Ubbe replied, trying to contain his annoyance.
Ivar hummed in response as he nodded his head. "You remember I had to ask you every single morning how blue were the whites of my eyes. Because if they were very blue, I was in great danger of breaking a bone."
"Yes, I remember," Ubbe replied with an attitude, "It was a big part of my childhood, 'How blue are Ivar's eyes today?'"
"I might break a bone, but I can never break a promise," Ivar argued in a venomous tone as he shook his head, "I can never forgive Lagertha for murdering our mother. How can you? Hmm?" He asked and as Ubbe turned away from him, Ivar shoved his older brother and shouted, "Our mother! Of course, I'm going to kill her!"
Lagertha casually poured out her drink, looking directly at Ragnar. "You can try."
"Oh, I will," Ivar snapped at her as he let out a large scoff.
"You said you would not fight your brothers," Ubbe reminded Ivar as both Bjorn and Ylva stood up from their seats, beginning to walk away.
"You are no longer my brother," Ivar replied in a stern tone, pressing the tip of his index finger against Ubbe's chest, "You were once my legs...But not anymore."
Freya began to laugh in amusement alongside Harald while Ubbe threw his cup on the ground and began to walk past Lagertha. "This was a waste of time," He complained in an aggravated tone.
"No. Not at all," Ivar called out after his brother as he shook his head, "You can surrender Kattegat now. You've all been talking about how terrible the slaughter would be. How we will kill our nearest relations and members of our family. I don't want to do that. Let us not do it. You. Bjorn. Ylva. Lagertha. Just go away. Leave this place. Do not put your men to the test."
Bjorn and Ylva turned around and within seconds, the two of them, Sihtric, and Ubbe unsheathed their swords.
It led to Harald, Halfdan, and Freya unsheathing their swords as well, prepared to fight.
However, before Ubbe could react, Lagertha extended her arm out, stopping him. "Not now," Lagertha told the group in a hushed tone and Ubbe scoffed as he backed away.
As everyone began to walk away, Freya stood in place for a long moment, staring at her mother, who stared back at her.
Ivar was on the verge of walking away when he stopped. He turned to look at Freya, who sighed and forced herself to follow after him as she walked away.
Ubbe had been right. It was breaking her to be on the opposing side of her mother. Though she'd never admit it.