"What does it matter?" I mumble.
"It matters because you're doing so well, and I don't want you to start hiding again," Jude said softly. "So what's the real problem with the ball?"
"Why do you have to be right about everything?" I complain.
"Call it a gift?" He says with a crooked grin.
"Feels more like a curse," I grumble.
"Whatever, spill," he says with a laugh.
"I'd be like a fish out of water," I say with a sigh. "I'm not comfortable with dresses, heels and getting gussied up. Hell I wouldn't even know what to do hair and make up wise."
"Weak," he chirps as I glare. "Sara showed me the dress, and you pulled off that sundress at dinner just fine. Claire and Sara would be more than happy to help you with hair and makeup. It's masked so you can literally hide in plain sight. What other bull have you got for me?" He challenges.
"I don't know how to dance," I mumbled.
"Ah, there it is," he says with a smile. "You've been training for weeks in combat, you're a quick study. What makes you think that you can't learn a couple steps?" I just shrug embarrassed.
"You know, I could teach you right?" He asked hopeful. I just look at him skeptically. "I'm actually a pretty good dancer, hell I got you to dance at the club," he grins victoriously.
"I seem to remember a lot of shots being involved," I defended.
"Ha, no one says you need to be sober at the ball, there will be a lot of drinking I'm sure. It'll be easyish, just have to follow my lead," he says with a grin.
"Come on," he says, leading me to the dojo. Strangely it was empty. Once in he locked the door and went to the sound system.
"I have to meet Jace in less than an ho-"
"Nice try, I've cleared it your mine tonight," he cut off tapping his temple. He starts the music and steps up to me.
"Your hand goes here," he says, draping it across his shoulder, while grabbing the other in his hand. "And I hold here." His other hand stopped in the small of my back.
"Waltz is easy, it's just a three step movement, follow my lead." He stepped to the side and again and again. He was right, it wasn't too difficult, I only stepped on his foot once.
For the next two hours he went through a range of music and some common steps. The last half hour he had Jace come in to go over switches and to have someone else dance with me.
Their easy going nature and laughs had me at ease and before long I was actually having a pretty good time. I wasn't about to do a foxtrot but I could at least follow the lead.
"As much fun as this is, I've got to get back to work," Jace says. "You've got one more lesson with me tomorrow afternoon elf," he pauses to add something else. "Meet me out front after lunch, jeans and tank."
"What are we doing?" Curious as they usually say leggings or sweatpants claiming jeans are too restrictive.
"Practical application, you typically wear jeans so that's what you'll wear." I nodded, and he took off.
"So how do you feel about dancing now?" Jude asked.
"Much better thanks, but I still don't want to be sober," I say with a laugh.
"So you'll go to the ball?" He asks hopeful.
"I'll consider it," I admit.
-----
I'm waiting out front for Jace and frown as he pulls up on his crotch rocket. He holds out a jacket and helmet for me.
"Really?" I ask. He just grins. "Can that thing even handle a passenger?"
"Shut up and suit up," he groans, petting his bike.
I hop on behind him and he hits the throttle hard, causing me to hold on tight. His bike was peppy and fast and he fully intended to show me just how much. After a short warp journey we pulled off and went down an overgrown gravel path.
He parked at the water's edge of what looked like it could have been an old construction site. The vegetation was overgrown but there were assorted concrete blocks like the ones you see used as barricades. The clearing was grassed over gravel and there was a sand pit and pile to the side.
"What are we doing here?" I asked, feeling uneasy.
"Your final exam," he replied as he took off his helmet and jacket draping them on the bike. I followed suit, but the uneasy feeling only grew.
'He's off? Hasn't called you elf once.' 'I know, I feel like something's wrong.'
"Why here though?" I ask in a guarded tone.
"No distractions," he says with a frown. "Listen Jess," he said like he was trying to soften a blow. "Normally I would have had years to teach someone what you've learned in such a short time. You have a lot of natural talent, but this," he says tapping on my head, "gets in the way."
"I really am trying," I mumble, defeated.
"I know you are," he said sadly. "And you're doing so well, but we're running out of time. I have to prepare you for worst case scenarios, so you don't freeze. If push comes to shove and you panic, you could die and I just can't have that." The pain and concern in his voice was sobering.
"So what do I need to do for the exam?" I ask, trying to change the topic. He grabbed my hand and dragged me to the far side of the blocks.
"Make it to my bike, or knock me out," he said stoically. I just gaped, I can't knock him out. "This is the real deal Jess, no safe words, no pause. The only way to end it is to tag my bike."
Something about the way he was saying it, and the way he was acting was really setting my nerves off. His regular demeanor was gone, he felt like a stranger.
"I can't beat you," I said in disbelief.
"Better try, 'cause we're not leaving till you do," he said as his expression hardened.
"Jace, you're the beta for fucks sake," I snap. "This is ridiculous." I go to walk away but he pushes me back. "The fuck man, I'm not doing this."
"Yes Jess, you are, I'm not your friend right now so do what you're told and it will be over," he growled. His energy shift and words sent a cold shiver down my spine.
I tried to push past him once more but he threw me back. My eyes locked on his cold grey ones as I realized he wasn't asking. He's been off this whole time, the only way away was through.
I went to push through once more and the moment he grabbed for me I dropped and twisted out of his grip and began to sprint. He tackled me hard from behind crushing me on the ground below him.
I hissed in pain at the impact as his weight drove the air from my lungs. I squirmed trying to wiggle out from below but he just put more of his weight on me.
"Come on sugar, you're better than this," he whispered. I froze as a chill ran through me. My ex used to call me sugar while he would beat and molest me.
"Stop it Jace," I whisper begged.
"No can do sugar," he replied nonchalantly. "You need to push through this, you are stronger than this." He got up and dragged me back to the starting point before letting me go.
"Again," he commanded.
I couldn't get a handle on my emotions as they crashed within me. Panic at hearing that word pass his lips. Anger bordering on rage, betrayal, hurt, they were all there demanding to be acknowledged.
"Again," he snarled.
I swallowed the lump in my throat as I pushed it all away. He swung first as I dropped and twisted. Expecting that he was already sweeping down for the pin but I was already doubling back to his open side.
"Now that's more like it," he growled as he came up empty. My mind demanded I race to the bike but the open ground was too big for me to cover before he could catch me. So I took up on the far side of a block buying time while I held my gained ground.
"Smart, you didn't panic this time," he conceded as he stalked me from the other side. "That's using your head, picking up ground at a solid hold versus a blind sprint you can't make. Now what sugar?"
"Stop it!" I screamed at him.
"No sugar, you can't let these words hold power over you," he snapped like he was scolding a petulant child.
In an instant he was over the block, lunging for me. I grabbed his outstretched wrist and dropped using his momentum to continue his flight. My feet landed solidly in his gut sending him up, but he grabbed my foot dragging me with him.
We crashed hard into the ground beyond the next block. He was on his back as I straddled him but he had full control of both of my wrists twisting them painfully.
"You're hurting me," I grated out.
"Dig deeper sugar," my anger mounted the more he used that name. I twisted through the pain to break his grip on my wrists. No sooner than I broke free, I was on my feet trying to put distance between us.
He crashed hard into me from behind slamming us against a block. I groaned from the force of the hit but managed a couple solid elbows into his ribs before he pinned me down.
My mind betrayed me, bringing forth memories of Jonah the flayer, pinning me the same way. I shuddered as I fought against the panic telling me to freeze.
"Not everyone will be out to kill you sugar," he says lowly. The panic blooms at his insinuation, he wouldn't? Would he? Suddenly I don't know the answer to that, and the realization chills me to my core.
"Some will just want to hurt you," he said twisting my left arm painfully. "Others will want to use you." The threat hung heavy in the air as my heart threatened to break free from my chest. My eyes burned as they watered against my permission.
"Get off of me, Jace," I screamed desperately.
"Make me," he growled in my ear. His proximity was repulsive, my body screamed at his touch. He ground his hips against me sending my panic to a new level.
Panic was losing to rage as he continued to dominate me. He ran his free hand down my back as I squirmed, trying to free myself.
"No," I screamed in desperation as his hand slipped under my shirt on my back. I couldn't hold back the renegade tear that slipped down my cheek or the sob that followed as he kicked my legs wider appart and slipped his between them.
He slid his hand down against my skin and slipped it beneath the waist of my jeans digging his fingers into my hip. More tears slipped out as the anger flared in me.
My free hand grasped at the dirt on the block gathering a fistful as I threw it over my head directly into his eyes. He snarled in rage as he coughed and wiped his eyes.
In his distraction I twisted my left arm free ignoring the burning sensation, and pushed off of the block driving the back of my head hard into his face. I saw stars from the force of the impact but he still had my hips pinned as I swung wildly with my right elbow.
The first hit landed savagely in his throat causing a strangled choke. The second blow was to his temple judging by the pain in my elbow. He cursed loudly as he staggered.
I didn't see the blow he landed on my right shoulder but it drove me back to the block with a painful hiss. I ignored the searing pain in my left arm as I drove my elbow up with all my force connecting hard.
He snarled in rage as he faltered. I took the opening pushing off hard from the block. As soon as I had some space I put my foot into it propelling us backwards.
He wrapped an arm around me to try and control me but I used the momentum of the fall to drive an elbow hard into his ribs, hearing a sickening crack as we hit the ground. He groaned out in pain but I hit him again and again in the same spot until he let me go.
As I scrambled up he launched one last desperate play to pin me but I brought my heel up hard to the family jewels. He cursed as he crumpled and I ran for the bike.
"Jess," he gasped desperately. I didn't even look at him as I grabbed a helmet, jumped on the bike, kicked it off and left him writhing in pain in a cloud of dust.
My hand was locked on the throttle propelling me faster than I should have been going. I was desperate to put space between us as my body started to falter as the adrenaline receded.
Finally I slowed down as my vision failed and the tears flowed freely.