Requested by: CricketCat @inigomentoya
Words: 2375
Description: The Marauders find out about Remus's home life and are determined to do something about it.
Story:
Remus sat quietly on the train ride back to school. He couldn't stop his hands from shaking, so he hid them in the sleeves of his sweater. It was on old thing that James's Mum gave him for Christmas in second year and he loved it to death.
Sirius was quiet that train ride as well, but for different reasons. James talked his ear off about the upcoming Quidditch season, but Sirius kept his attention on Remus.
He didn't like the way that sweater hung off his frame like it was two sizes too big when it fit fine the year before. He didn't like how Remus's cheekbones stood out so starkly. (Well, actually he didn't mind that so much, he just would've preferred if Remus looked healthier with the cheekbones). He didn't like the sadness in Remus's eyes.
Because Remus could manipulate his attitude and his expressions like clay anyway he wanted and he could fool just about anybody, but the truth was in his eyes. There were pools of sadness in there, but blink and you'll miss it.
When they got to the welcoming feast that night, Remus was so, so hungry, but he was finicky about eating. He hadn't done much of that over the summer and he feared he'd get an upset stomach if he tried to eat too much too fast.
Sirius had been watching him closely. He and James had been trying to piece things together about Remus for years now. Remus was never a sharer like James was. James just loved to tell you about everything.
But Remus, you either had to figure it out yourself or pry. Nobody liked to pry with Remus, it just pushed him away because he would put up his walls again. Sirius hated those walls. He wanted to take them down, brick by brick. He felt like he'd been working at it tirelessly for quite some time, but Remus was just rebuilding them right behind him.
Before they knew about Remus's furry little problem, Remus used to tell them that he was going home to his sick mother.
They of course had felt bad for him, but got worried when he would come back hurt. It was James that voiced the idea that maybe someone at home was hurting him. Sirius had of course already considered it, but not in the negative light James had. It was sort of a natural possibility to Sirius.
But the way James's voice had lilted when he said it made Sirius think that maybe it wasn't normal for parents to hurt their kids. He'd expressed his concerns to James that night and James had gotten so upset when he heard about his mother's idea of discipline.
Once Sirius had settled with his own definition of abuse, he started to apply the signs to Remus and everything fit. The timing, the injuries, how tense he was when he talked about his family...
But when they'd figured out his real secret, they dismissed the idea altogether. They knew that Remus's mother had indeed been sick, but she had already passed away a few years prior. Now, as Sirius sat beside Remus and watched him pick at his food, he wondered if they were so far off with their theory.
After a few weeks, Sirius mostly forgot about it. Remus after like nothing was wrong, so they acted like nothing was wrong. A lot of their friends said James was oblivious, and he was for a lot of things, but when it came to his friends and their moods and feelings, nothing got past James. Not even Remus's acting.
James kept his questions to himself, but he kept an eye on Remus and kept his chocolate stash stocked with all sorts of divine Honeydukes bars.
Once it was finally time for their Halloween prank, things had finally settled into their normal rhythm. Sirius and James had been distracted with the planning, getting their genius break throughs from Remus's genius mind.
It was the night before Halloween and the four of them were sneaking around the halls to set up the prank. The only problem was that Filch and Mrs. Norris were on the look out for them, as the Marauders had set a tradition for Halloween Pranks, as well as Christmas and April Fools. Everywhere else in between was at random.
They were too big to all be under the invisibility cloak at once, so Peter and Remus were under it while Sirius set the prank and James watched the Map.
Sirius was nearly done when James whispered harshly, "Filch is coming!"
Sirius thought quickly, spotting a supply cabinet just down the hall.
"Quick! In here!" He wrenched the door open and it squealed louder than Sirius had been expecting and he winced at the sound, but ushered his friends in all the same. He hopped in at the last second, swinging the door closed with him.
Peter took the cloak off the top of them and laughed under his breath. "That was a close one."
James nodded and clapped Pete on the shoulder. Sirius could hear Remus breathing hard from the dash to the closet and Sirius almost commented on the exhilaration of it when he realized with a start that Remus wasn't simply out of breath, but hyperventilating.
His joyful mood was gone in an instant and he put a hand on Remus's shoulder. "Rey, are you alright? Take deep breaths, mate."
James picked up on the mood change immediately and jumped to attention. "Take a seat, Rey," he said gently.
Peter only stared on in confusion, the invisibility cloak still folded over his arm so it looked like his hand was floating away from his elbow.
James helped Remus to sit down and Sirius sat across from him, searching his eyes for the problem. He found that they were foggy and filled with something he thought was either fear or panic. Maybe a little bit of both.
"What's the matter, Moony? Can you tell me what I can do?" Sirius asked, taking Remus's shaking hands in his and rubbing soothing circles with his thumbs.
Remus wasn't really in the storage closet. He was in the cellar back home. He could smell the blood on the walls more than he could see it and it caused his breath to hitch and he didn't want to be there, he really didn't want to be there. The walls were closing in on him just like they did in the cellar and he hated it in there.
James and Sirius shared a look when Remus didn't respond to Sirius.
"We need to get him out of here," James said. "I think he's having, I don't know, anxiety? A panic attack maybe? Like he used to get in second year?"
Sirius remembered. Remus used to get them all the time, but usually they were able to calm him down fairly easily by asking him what he needed. But this was worse.
"Maybe we ought to see Madam Pomfrey," Peter suggested from the side.
"Maybe we ought to," Sirius agreed, then to Remus, "Can you stand?"
Remus was trembling like a leaf, but this time he rolled his eyes up to look at Sirius like he'd heard his voice somewhere far off but couldn't see him.
"Here, help me," James said, motioning for Sirius and Peter to lift Remus onto his back. They did, and Remus clung to James and they made their way quietly through the halls while Peter watched the map.
They made it to the Hospital Wing and Peter went to knock on Pomfrey's personal room while James and Sirius picked a bed and sat Remus down on it.
Remus pulled his knees up to his chest instinctively and buried his face in his arms and rocked himself back and forth as Sirius rubbed his back. He didn't like how he could feel Remus's ribs through his sweater and he wondered not for the first time if Remus was eating all right.
Madam Pomfrey hurried over in her nightgown and fussed over Remus, giving him an anxiety reducing potion and he came out of the attack slowly, leaning into Sirius's arms in his exhaustion. "I don't want to go back to the cellar," he whispered in a croaky voice.
Sirius's eyebrows furrowed, but he brushed Remus's hair out of his eyes and held him close. "Don't worry, Moony. You don't have to go back there."
Remus whimpered.
Once Pomfrey was satisfied, she gave him a sleeping draught and Remus was out like a light.
Madam Pomfrey motioned the three boys into the front of the wing, away from Remus. "How did this happen? Have you any idea what triggered the attack?"
They thought about it. "Well, we were in a storage closet—" James realized his mistake. Poppy raised an eyebrow.
"For some reason," James continued. "And he just started hyperventilating. When he used to have panic attacks, he usually could help us figure out how to help him, but he wouldn't even respond to us and we got worried so we decided to bring him here"
Sirius remembered a detail. "He said something about a cellar, but we were in a closet."
Madam Pomfrey crossed her arms. "There aren't any cellars at the castle."
"No, but there is one at his house!" Peter pointed out, excited that he'd remembered the detail.
Sirius felt a twist in his stomach. Sure, Remus hated the Shrieking Shack, but he never reacted so terribly to a place he transformed before. Sirius just knew that there was more to that story.
Sirius looked up and James met his eyes and Sirius could tell that they'd both thought the same thing. Something else was going on in that cellar.
+++
The boys meant to ask Remus about it, but he was still recovering from his panic attack and preparing for the full moon, so they could never find the right time.
It wasn't until after the full moon that they saw the perfect opportunity. He was sitting in the common room in front of the fire, working on an essay. He was wrapped up in a blanket and gnawing on a chocolate bar, looking about ready to fall asleep.
After some convincing, Sirius managed to get Remus to his feet and they walked up to the dorm where James and Peter were waiting for the confrontation. Remus sensed the atmosphere as soon as he walked in the door and his shoulders tensed.
"Take a seat, Moony," James said. He worded it like a suggestion, but his tone left no room for argument. Remus sighed and sat on his bed.
Sirius sat beside him and held his hand. They always held hands, but recently it sent a fluttery feeling in Sirius's stomach when he did it and he wasn't quite sure why.
James sat across from them with his elbows on his knees like he was their father about to give them some kind of life lesson. Peter sat on his bed behind James's.
"Remus," James started, then stopped. He wasn't sure how to start. He didn't want to mention the cellar unless he had to, in case it triggered another panic attack.
Remus stared at his feet, scared to look them in the eyes in case he betrayed information.
James cleared his throat and tried again. "Does your dad...does he hurt you?"
"No," Remus answered too quickly like he'd been expecting the question. The other boys thought he sounded just a little bit too defensive. "No, he...he wouldn't do that."
Sirius squeezed his hand. Remus was getting too emotional and his facade was slipping.
Sirius could tell by the look on James's face that he didn't believe Remus either.
"Remus, you can tell us—" Sirius started.
"No!" Remus shouted, ripping his hand away. "No," he said again, voice breaking. "I'm fine, I can...I can handle it."
"You shouldn't have to handle it," James said. "Please, let us help you."
"Like you helped Sirius?!" Remus shouted. He was borderline hysterical, his walls crumbling against his will. Sirius could practically see his construction workers in there, fighting desperately to fix the holes in the walls.
James was hurt by the comment, Sirius could tell. Sirius spent Christmases with the Potters, but he still had to go home for the summer. It was the best they could do at the moment.
It occurred suddenly to Sirius that Remus spent every Christmas at school, even though he'd be lonely. And he remembered the way Remus had been so upset when they'd gotten detention last year for their prank on McGonagall. And then he remembered how emotionlessly he'd accepted their punishment for the Halloween prank (detention twice a week for the rest of the term) like he was storing that fear somewhere else.
And Sirius realized that when they were considering abuse in first and second year, how they'd seen all the signs...he realized that it really had been happening all that time. Sirius thought about the way Remus regarded himself, how he didn't hesitate to call himself a monster.
Sirius knew from experience that children don't think that way about themselves unless they are taught to. Sirius felt foolish that he hadn't seen it before. He of all people hadn't seen it.
"Come home with us for Christmas," James offered, changing the subject. Sirius wanted to glare at him, (they were finally getting somewhere!) but he understood why James did it.
Sirius nodded along, excitement blooming in his chest at the possibilities, the fun they would have and the mischief they would get into!
Remus seemed to be shrinking into himself again, so Sirius reached and grabbed his hand again before he could, ignoring the butterflies.
Remus looked like he wanted to say no, but Sirius squeezed his fingers and looked him in the eye and Remus nodded. "Okay," he said quietly.
James and Sirius grinned.
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I'll do a part four, this is getting long lol. I love this story line, thanks everyone that requested and gave me ideas for the storyline!