Alice's POV
I walked through the door of Lucas' house with the weight of a herd of elephants on my shoulders, and an enthusiastic Torin venting on my heels.
"Okay, but the fact that everyone pretended they didn't even know L' makes it obvious he's still alive! Something's up." We had just finished asking every single person at Cane HQ about Lucas' whereabouts.
"Or, they got killed and the gang members are keeping their mouths shut about it."
"How would that make any logical sense? They didn't look guilty, they looked clueless. I mean, I gossiped about L' to Charlie just a couple days ago! And today it was like she'd never heard of him before." He has a point. Other than their blatant ignorance of the brothers' exhistance, It was as if they didn't know their leader hadn't just been killed. They didn't seem to recognize me as his killer either. So the options are, they're all really good actors, or the details of his death haven't been made clear yet.
"Even if he is still alive, we have no way of finding him and no way to know if he's ever coming back here." My pessimistic side had taken over as we asked the last person in Cane about L' and his Brother. I was surprised when over half the people either didn't know Gavin or claimed he died a long time ago. He's like a paradox around there.
I plopped down on the couch and pinched the bridge of my nose. I don't think it actually helped the pressure in my head, but it helped psychologically.
Torin came and stood at the arm of the couch "You're not giving up, are you?"
"No. I can't. Lucas and Gavin are the only friends I have right now. I'm not going to give them up." Torin nodded and continued standing there awkwardly. "You know you can sit down if you want. Sitting doesn't mean surrender."
"Right. Thanks." He sat in the chair adjacent to me, still seeming tense.
"If you have any more ideas, let me know. I'll listen to just about anything." The silence that followed was deafening. I could feel Torin's eyes shift from me to other random spots in the room. I personally didn't feel uncomfortable, but this dude was seriously tense.
After a minute or two I turned my head to look at him as he continued to fidget in his seat. "How are you still alive?"
"What?"
"No offense, but you are the pewniest gang member I have ever seen. Granted I haven't seen very many.."
"Ah yeah. I just, don't do well with silence."
"You look like your in pain. Does silence really bother you that much?"
"It's just.." He hesitated and sighed before saying, "It's a long story."
"Well.. I don't know if or when the boys will show up, so why don't you start the story and we'll see how far we get."
"I-I don't think you'd be interested. It's a classic sob story." He shrugged
"If you want to hear a sob story I'll give you one. You tell me yours and I'll tell you mine. Deal?"
He breathed out a laugh. "Okay. But you asked for it."
That day, I finally learned Torin's backstory. I learned about how his older siblings used to use him and bully him. How they would blame all of their faults on Torin and their parents believed them whole heartedly. The punishment he got almost everyday was the silent treatment. His parents would sit on a couch in the living room with Torin in front of them and they would simply stare at him. No talking, nothing more than staring him down with disapproving eyes. After a while his parents quit even acknowledging his presence. Unless, of course, his siblings got him in trouble. Then it would be the same blank stare in a quiet room. Eventually, he became insecure and the punishment he got when he was little gave him a phobia of silence.
"So how did you deal with moving away from home? And you know, living alone?"
"Lately I've been able to cope with it if I'm totally alone. But no matter how much time goes by, I still can't handle a quiet room if someone else is there. Even if they aren't actively with me. My parents didn't offer any support, so I invested any money I earned in buying music for my phone. Next thing I know, my rent is paid, I have a new phone, and a well paying job. Just not as honest as one would hope."
"So that's why you were so uncomfortable earlier." I summed up
"Yeah. I hate that something so petty and stupid still has so much of an affect me."
I looked at Torin in a new light. He was such a nice guy. It made me mad that something like that had handicapped him for so long.
"Well, that was my sob story. How about your own? I bet you have a lot of stories about growing up with someone like L'" Oh right. His delusion.
"Okay.. Well I think I should start by telling you, I'm not Lucas' Sister."
"What? But you-"
"No, I really didn't."
"So, why are you here?" And thus I traced all the way back to a few months ago. The day I awoke to my phone ringing. I expected it to be my parents saying they had landed. And instead I got the shocking news that my parents had died in a plane crash and I was to move to my Brother's house immediately.
I tried to run through everything as calmly as possible. But this was the first time I'd actually thought and talked through everything from start to finish and the tears that were shed were unavoidable. I looked to the floor or my hands the majority of the story. Only occasionally did I look up at Torin, and at times he seemed genuinely engaged in the story, his facial expressions showing either sympathy or shock or even suspense when I told him about the kidnappings.
"Wow.. Your backstory puts mine to shame."
"Eh.. It happened more recently than yours so all the details are still fresh. That's all."
"You've really been through hell and back, huh."
A single chuckle made it's way out of my lungs. "I suppose so."
He studied my face, seemingly unbothered by the short silence. But I started talking again so it wouldn't last too long. "Do you want something to eat? Lucas' Brother is a great cook so the pantry is stocked."
A smile formed on his lips. "Sure. And thanks."
"For what?"
"This. Your the first friend I've made in a long time."
"Are we friends?" I asked jokingly
"Well I wouldn't call us enemies." We both laughed and made our way to the kitchen where we made a sketchy soup that ended up in the trash and in the end settled for crackers, cheese, and carrots that were sliced up for a future recipe.
"What else can we eat?" I asked as I opened the fridge for the fifth time
"You're still hungry??"
"Yes! I eat when I'm anxious!"
"But this is the fifth time you've looked in there and you've still found nothing!!" He laughed
We hadn't stopped laughing since the crackers and cheese had been consumed. What we were laughing about is hard to say. From an outsider's standpoint, we probably looked delirious. From an insider's standpoint, we still looked delirious. All I know is that it felt really good.
Then, as if the sun had disappeared from the sky, we both sobered. Torin was the one to speak what we were both thinking "It's been a long time since I've laughed that hard."
"Me too." I closed the fridge and went to sit on one of the bar stools. "What time is it?"
He pulled out his phone. "Almost seven."
The serotonin from all the laughter gently ebbed out of my system and I came back to reality where Lucas and Gavin are still MIA. "Do you think they'll come back here?"
"Well, you said this is their house. I don't see any reason why they wouldn't come back here."
Torin's voice of reason helped calm my uncertainty, but the gnawing on my heart didn't cease as the question of When they would return flashed through my head like a neon light.
Once again the silence fell on our shoulders. I could tell Torin felt awkward, but he wasn't nearly as uncomfortable as he had been before. I got off the barstool and stretched my arms out. "Well. I think we should just call it a day. We're both tired and if I don't find anything else to do I'm going to eat the whole kitchen."
Torin let out a small laugh and he followed me into the hallway. I stopped and gestured toward Gavin's door. "Here, this is Gavin's room. You can sleep in here for the night."
"Thank you, Alice, for everything. I think tonight was the most fun I've had in a long time."
I offered him a small smile. "Good night, Torin." I turned to Lucas' door.
"Uh- Alice?"
"Yeah?" I turned to find him fiddling with his hands and looking rather nervous. "What's wrong?"
He took a fidgety step toward me, and before I knew it he had quickly pecked my cheek. I hardly had time to register what had happened before he disappeared behind Gavin's bedroom door.
I couldn't help but smile. This kid is so.. Pure. I can't believe he's survived in this environment. This guy seems totally different from the one I met in the woods. It's as if getting to know him made him meeker rather than bolder. How on earth could a person change that much in such a short time?
This queer but endearing phenomenon occupied my thoughts all through my nightly routine. As I climbed into Lucas' bed, his scent overtook my senses and I realized this is the first time I've actually slept under his covers. Though tonight, rather than comfort me, the scent only made the nagging in my heart grow stronger. Almost to the point that it was painful every time it pulsed. Despite this, I buried my head in his pillow and filled my lungs with as much of the scented air as possible before letting it out slowly, willing myself to calm down and forget.
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A/N
Do you ever smell something that brings you back to your childhood? And then you get real emo and nostalgic and it's kinda depressing? No? Okay then.
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