Vingt - Twenty
A smile found its way onto Fay's glossed lips as he spotted Eden leaning against his house. Fay had a red sweater on and a red ribbon complimenting his brown hair. Eden wore an army green jacket over a band tee, one hand cupping the lighter to keep the flame from blowing out due to the dusk wind.
Fay played with the straps on his backpack, veering away from the sidewalk and toward the other boy. Though Eden wasn't looking up, Fay ventured to guess that he knew of his sudden appearance due to how bright his red outfit was in contrast with the blue sunset.
"Hey." Fay greeted, having just got back from drama club. His teacher pretty much just further congratulated them all on their successful performance. They debuted on Saturday, then had a second performance on Sunday. Both days the auditorium was full, some people even going twice. Fay's family was one of them. Eisley and Cal did as well.
"Hey." Eden mumbled just as the cigarette was lit and he tucked the lighter back into his pocket. He took the stick in between his forefinger and middle finger as he took in a breath and handed it to Fay. "Drama club?"
Fay nodded as he inhaled the toxins. The smoke blew out of his mouth like a swirling fog that represented everything dark. "Yeah. We didn't really do much, though."
The lack of their voices didn't really feel like silence due to the ruffling of nearby trees, fluttering of late night birds, and buzz of distant traffic from so many streets away. Somehow, Fay found himself in the same place all over again.
The sun was setting, this time an onset of purple and blue, clouds illuminated by the dark hues and casting a soft glow down onto the world below. Another sunset outside of Eden's house. This one was so much different though.
And it wasn't because of the contrast of color tones, but rather the contrast in thought matter. Fay knew things about Eden that he hadn't before. About his sister, about his self-harm. Maybe even potential further abuse, or even a possible eating disorder.
Those were all things that Fay would never have thought to be a possibility until right then, as he stood beside the complex boy. His pink converse lightly played with the grass of Eden's front yard as they stood unspeaking.
Until, Fay parted his lips. "Tell me, what were your thoughts?"
Eden's green eyes glanced over at Fay, one eyebrow quirked up slightly as he tried to understand what Fay meant by that. "Thoughts on what?"
A smile grew on his lips as he stepped away from the house and faced Eden. "Why, my exquisite performance of Mercutio, of course." He then proceeded to bow extravagantly.
With the role of his eyes, a nice little smile formed on Eden's lips as well. It was relieving to see. Fay was scared that after that large fight, they would never make progress again. Everything had become about Eden's health, and it still was, but for the time being, it was nice to joke freely. "You answered your own question, didn't you?"
Fay hummer momentarily, stroking a nonexistent beard. "But that was in the words of Mercutio. What say you, E?"
As soon as he said it, Fay regretted it. Had he said it before without realizing it? It was such an easy habit to fall into. He prayed that he hadn't ruined the good mood, and when Eden only paused for a split second, Fay knew that he was going to let it slide. However, Fay still felt guilty for having said it at all.
Why Eden didn't like it so much, Fay had no idea. All he knew was that it was something he told him to stop doing, and he was doing it again because he had forgot.
"I say that it was good." Was all Eden gave away, knowing that remaining so neutral was not at all what Fay had hoped for. "You're a real natural when it comes to acting."
"How flattering." Fay smirked, fanning his face lightly. He had no idea what got him into such an odd mood, but he found that it was rather fun.
"Don't let it go to your head." Eden rolled his eyes, holding the cigarette out again for Fay to take.
However, Fay shook his head. "No can do. I shouldn't be smoking anymore if I want to remain the greatest actor of all time."
"I never said that you were the greatest actor of all time." Eden countered, sighing at Fay's theatrics. "And it's never stopped you from smoking in the past."
"But I have a feeling that being called a natural by the Eden - whatever your middle name is - Ramsey is a once in the lifetime opportunity." Fay pointed out, laughing softly. "I doubt that you just throw that around often."
"I don't have a middle name." Eden couldn't help but start to laugh a little as well. Fay was being too dramatic not to. "And I could easily redact that title right now."
"No can do, kind sir." Fay shook his head and folded his arms over his chest proudly with a charming smile. "I'm simply the greatest in all of thespian history, because Eden Ramsey said so."
"You're insufferable." He replied, shaking his head out of defeat. Fay felt overly giddy after having put Eden into a good mood. That meant so much to Fay, and he wasn't entirely sure why.
"I prefer the term perfect."
"Well I prefer the term quiet."
That last piece of dialogue resulted in a long moment of silence. It wasn't that Fay didn't have anything else that he could say, it was that he got distracted. Standing in front of the taller boy, looking at him, he was too focused on something else to bother finding more words.
Eden's skin was so pale, unlike Fay's subtle tan, and his green eyes appeared tired. Blonde hair seemed overgrown with how it stuck out from under the black fabric, and his shoulders were sloped. Despite all of this, Fay, for the first time ever, thought that Eden was very attractive in a way other than sexually.
His pale pink lips were chapped and didn't look the least bit soft, yet the idea of kissing them again sounded far too pleasant. What was with him? It was hard to think of something else. They were just a hookup, right? That was all. That was it.
The sound of Fay's own breathing registered in his ears. Why was he breathing so quickly? Starting to panic slightly over his own body and mind, Fay was about to break the silence by saying goodbye so that he wouldn't have to face the odd emotions he was suddenly feeling, but then a sound startled him out of the daze.
It was the sound of Eden's stomach growling. It was low at first, almost inaudible from their distance, but then it grew louder. The sight of Eden's eyes widening and his arm going to cover his stomach with the hope of it quieting down only confirmed Fay's thoughts.
It scared Fay. Was he right all along? All of those previous emotions that were causing him to panic didn't necessarily vanish, but were overwritten by a new sense of concern. Did Eden really have an eating disorder? He was hoping that was just speculation and that Fay was being overdramatic. However, he wasn't so sure.
"When did you last eat?" Fay knew that there were probably better ways to go about asking, but he knew that Eden would probably evade the answer no matter how blatantly Fay asked it.
"Earlier." Eden told him. What Fay didn't know was that it wasn't a lie. Eden truly had ate earlier. But it was no longer in his stomach, by then it was long gone down the drain.
"Are you sure?" He pressed lightly, wishing that Eden would just take care of himself. It wasn't healthy, and Fay was scared that it had been going on for far longer than he originally guessed.
"Why do you care?" Eden retorted. The lighthearted environment was already gone. Fay wished that it wasn't. "I'm not hungry."
"Your stomach growled." Fay said, gesturing to said stomach. There was a big difference between bizarre and funny stomach noises, and when someone's stomach growls. That was clearly his stomach growling.
"I'm not hungry." Eden repeated. Fay was starting to get a little bit fearful.
"But if you were, you would go eat, right?" He couldn't help but try to make sure. Depending on Eden's response and his body language when he did so, it would answer Fay's question about whether or whether not Eden had an eating disorder.
"No." Eden said sarcastically. "I would starve to death."
That threw Fay for a loop. He was expecting for Eden to say something more like of course I would, but replying with sarcasm was like wearing a mask. The problem was that Fay wasn't sure if Eden was trying to mask the truth or not.
"Hypothetically, if you were to starve yourself, would you ever tell anyone?" The question was dark, but the subject matter was important. Fay needed to get as much out of Eden as he possibly could.
"I'm not starving myself." Eden said simply, but though he was seemingly looking into Fay's eyes when he said it, Fay could tell that his eyes were out of focus. He was lying. "You don't need to worry about me."
"My offer still stands, Eden Ramsey." Fay told him, looping his fingers through the straps of his backpack as he glanced up at the sky. The purples had all faded into blue hues. "I'll always be here if you need someone. Whether we fight or not. Sometimes the first step is the hardest, even if it's the smallest."
He repeated the same quote, hoping that Eden was truly listening. Fay didn't know how to reach him. He was on a whole other continent, truly believing that he sat alone, unbeknownst the fact that at the very least, Fay was right there. Fay knew that he had no clue just how awful things must have been, and still are, for Eden. All he knew was that he was willing to help. But he couldn't do so if Eden wasn't willing to allow him to.
"Goodnight, E." He didn't even bother trying to keep himself from saying it that time. Though he wasn't sure why Eden didn't like the nickname, he figured that he was already mad at him anyway. Eden never said anything, watching silently as Fay turned and began back down the sidewalk to his own home.
They were two completely different boys from different worlds, but Fay found that he was slowly getting more and more intrigued by Eden's world. Eden found that he wanted more and more to open up to Fay's world. But right then, the door stayed shut and his body remained empty.
But his thoughts did not cease, and his want to get better didn't fade. Eden wanted so desperately to figure things out on his own, but everyday it was proving to be harder and harder.