Okay, I'll admit it: there was an upside with having Jem and Niall knowing. One being that Jem was right there to back me up and cover me the second I fed my dad a lie about where I would be without hesitation. I sent him a grateful smile and he smiled back, nodding; I didn't know why he wanted to help me out, though.
And the upside to having Niall know? Well, he was suspicious of me the whole time... and now I had him on my side. He knew how I really felt about Zayn and he also knew what everyone thought of Perrie, and I could safely say he liked me a lot more than her. But there was also a bad side, which included operation get-real-Perrie-to-hate-Zayn.
"Hello my little twin," Perrie answered the phone with a relaxed voice.
I fell onto her bed, rolling onto my stomach and saying: "Hey, Perrie. I have a few questions."
"And they are?"
"Does Zayn–" I stopped.
I couldn't just bash lies on Zayn. I froze up right then, not knowing what to say and what to replace my words with, feeling bad just by saying his name and knowing I was about to lie about him.
Perrie, however, seemed impatient. "Does Zayn...?"
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "I meant," I said slowly, opening my eyes again. "Does the guy you're with... Is he hot?"
And she cheered up immediately. "I can send you pictures of us! We're so cute, if you ask me."
New plan.
Make her like this guy enough to want to break up with Zayn.
"Totally! He sounded cute," I fake-gushed, trying to make her more into it. "Imagine if you could just move to the island? Or take him here? Ugh, you guys would be the couple of the century!"
She hesitated, "You really think so?"
I smirked – my plan was working! "Of course."
"Too bad he isn't famous," I barely heard her mutter. "Anyway, I'll send you pictures later, but I've got to go. Talk to you later, twin."
And then she hung up, making me groan. I was so close! Sighing, I rolled off of the bed, leaving her phone there and pulling out my own phone to text Jem and see what was happening at home. I was currently in my sweatpants and a white tank top that showed some of my tan stomach and my blonde hair was in a bun on the top of my head.
As I was texting a few minutes later, I felt someone's cold hands slither around my waist, pulling my tank top up an inch more to show more of my stomach. Shocked, I nearly jumped in their arms, turning my head to see a smirking Zayn at me. Eyes wide, I threw the phone on the bed and grinned, happy as ever to see him.
"Hey!" I chirped excitedly, "What are you doing here?"
"What, I can't surprise my girlfriend?"
It was the first time he said it, which also meant it was the first time he said it like that. The way Zayn said 'girlfriend' was the same way I thought of him as a boyfriend – he wasn't actually mine. It was like he suddenly was actually saying that we weren't even really dating, and confirming that this was for publicity and he didn't care about me.
My smile dropped and I looked forward, somehow hurt from the word. I thought...
Zayn let go of me and sat at the end of my bed, looking at me. "So, I have to cancel our plans for tonight. I'm going to a party instead."
ZAYNS POV~
"So, I have to cancel our plans for tonight. I'm going to a party instead." I heard myself say, but I knew I wasn't into this whole thing.
I was getting too attached to her, the new her – the side of Perrie that was making me forget this whole thing was just a publicity stunt, and that we weren't actually 'in love'. I had to detach myself before I ended up messing things up completely by falling for her... even though I felt like I already was.
I saw her just look at me before smiling. "Okay, that's fine."
And the way she would let me go like that made everything hurt. I was falling too fast, and in the end, it wouldn't end well – I had to get out. Now.
"Well, I'm going to meet the lads now," I forced myself to say, getting up. "See you later."
"Have fun at the party." Perrie said.
I took one last glance at her and wondered how she was suddenly so beautiful and kind without even trying. But then I remembered that this wasn't really her – the real her, wherever she was in there, was just a girl that cared only for her career, and wouldn't give another thought about me or what I did. She didn't care. She was heartless, when it came to me.
So tonight, I would get drunk, kiss as many girls I could, and try to forget the way she makes me feel.
~*~
I glanced at the clock on my nightstand, and saw it read a quarter past ten. Zayn was probably at the party by now, surrounded by beautiful girls that weren't his 'pretend girlfriend', and that he would love to hook up with. But why should I care? I was just Lela Oswalt, the American trying to fake her way into thinking she was an important British singer.
A reminder came up on Perrie's phone that said: Call radio station for two minute phone interview! The number was underneath that, and my eyes widened. It was the first time I was publically going to act like Perrie to people other than random fans and the guys; I had a phone interview. Oh no.
I prayed I wouldn't screw it up as I clicked the number, putting the phone up to my ear shakily. My breath was hitched as it rang twice, and someone told me to hold for a second while they introduced me to the air. Oh my God, oh my God! I was going to be on the radio!
"Hey Perrie, you're on the air! Thanks so much for calling in tonight." I recognized the British radio station as Z100, the most popular one of all.
I tried my hardest to happily say: "No problem!"
"I think one thing we all want to discuss the most is all of the gossip about you and your boyfriend, Zayn Malik." The interviewer said, and I almost scowled. "There have been a lot of rumors lately saying you two are going to get married soon, and others that say you're going to break up. Clear to clarify any of them while we have you here, Perrie?"
I set my jaw and faked happiness. "Zayn and I are really happy right now. We aren't going to break up, but I think we can all agree we're a little young for marriage. We'll let Miley and Liam Hemsworth take over the whole marriage scene for now!"
They laughed at my joke.
I wanted to punch one of them in the face.
People were so nosy.
"Well, for all the Zerrie believers out there," He said, and I heard background music for the next song started to fade in. "There you have it! Thanks for being on the show, Perrie. It's been lovely, as always."
"Thanks for having me!" I chirped.
But when I hung up the phone, I was just annoyed. So, like any annoyed girl, I did what was natural: I went downstairs, walked straight into the kitchen, and started to eat.
~*~
It had been at midnight when I got the call from Niall.
"Where are you?" He questioned, and I heard a familiar voice in the background talk about how he could drive home perfectly fine.
I turned my bedside light on: let's get real, I couldn't sleep anyway. "Home. Why?"
In the background, Zayn asked who Niall was talking to. "Perrie," He said back, and Zayn said something I couldn't understand. "Perrie, I need you. How quickly can you get to my flat?"
So that's what I was doing here, ringing Niall's doorbell at twelve thirty at night, freezing to death in jeans and a sweatshirt that I had hastily pulled over my head before climbing out the window at my dads house. The door opened a few minutes later, and Niall looked at me, tired and exasperated. Making room for me to come in, I did so, turning to see him shut the front door.
When he turned to me, he looked apologetic. "I'm sorry. Were you asleep?"
I shook my head: "Far from it."
He knew what I meant, and shot me another sad glance.
"I hate to just stick you with him," Niall said, leading me towards the living room. "But I already have to handle Harry. Can you just make sure he gets to sleep alright?"
I nodded, in agreement. "Of course."
Even though I was still hurt by the whole thing earlier, I wasn't going to make Niall deal with two drunken friends that were stubborn and loud at this time of night. So he smiled at me thankfully and I walked over to the couch was, where Zayn was draped across it. When he saw me, his eyes lit up and he hopped up immediately.
"Perrie!" Zayn exclaimed, and then froze, narrowing his eyes. "What are you doing here?"
I tried to smile, grabbing his hand. "I'm taking you home. Come on."
He didn't protest; in fact, his hand tightened around mine, and we started walking – or in his case, stumbling – towards Niall's front door. Since they lived in the same apartment building, we just had to get in the elevator safely before clicking a button that would bring us up to his floor.
"I missed you," Zayn sighed, resting his forehead on my shoulder and breathing in my scent.
He was drunk.
He didn't really care.
I kept my mouth shut other than the "come on" I whispered when we reached his floor. I brought Zayn to his door, our hands holding each other, and opened it to bring him inside carefully. Zayn stumbled inside, leaving me to shut the door and follow him into his bedroom, where he collapsed onto the bed.
He stripped off his shirt and pants all while lying down, throwing them next to the bed, onto the floor. I could barely see him through the darkness of his room, but his hand found mine again, and he pulled me down onto the bed.
"No, Zayn," I said quietly. "I'm going home."
I could suddenly see his big bright brown orbs as he begged, almost as if he weren't intoxicated: "No, please... Stay."
And I really don't think I could've said no even if I wanted to. So, with a sigh, I slipped my hand out of his and walked towards his dresser, pulling out a white tee shirt and a pair of boxers. Turning my back towards him, even though I was sure he wasn't looking, I tugged the clothing on and tried to ignore the intoxicating scent of him on me.
Trudging back to the bed, I laid down hesitantly, feelings his arms wrap around me completely and pull me into him. Zayn didn't loosen his grip whatsoever, and kept his head buried in the crook of my neck with his arms draped around me, kind of just holding me. I scolded myself for feeling so content in that moment.
"Why don't we do this more often?" Zayn mumbled into my neck, his hot breath making me instinctively snuggle closer to him.
I shut my eyes. "What?"
"Cuddle. Just lay here, you and me."
I didn't answer, but I didn't think I had to. I wish we did, Zayn, God I wish we did. But this is all make believe, just pretending – I didn't mean anything to him, so maybe he could do this with his next girlfriend. His real girlfriend.
___________
:(
sad
really sad
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