Vikk's P.O.V.
For the most part, I was able to keep it hidden on camera. I could control it for short period of times but only with immense concentration and energy, making me seem spacey or unfocused at times, but enough where it wasn't obvious. As such, my audience didn't know.
Outside of the Sidemen, my family and some of my closest friends, no one knew I had Tourette's. I knew my condition wasn't nearly as bad as some others I knew, with only a few involuntary motor movements, or tics, and two vocal tics that I could count. It was enough to be diagnosed, but I could supress it if I tried and it certainly wasn't like the cases you see on television- swearing, violent motor tics, loud repetitions.
I kept it hidden out of fear mostly. I was already picked on and hated by my audience for multiple things and adding tics on top of that was basically asking to be bullied. The boys didn't mind, but I did. I hated it. I hated these involuntary noises and movements, they were distracting, annoying and got in the way.
Lachlan, however, didn't have that luxury. His condition was much worse than my own and there was physically no way to hide it. He couldn't supress his numerous tics and so they were shown on video because he had to- if he didn't keep them in, he wouldn't be able to work. His tics were much more violent, full body jerking, twitching, and a lot of loud, involuntary noises that interrupted his recordings. He told me how much he used to hate it but as he shifted to appealing to a slightly younger audience, he embraced it. Set a good example for them, show them that people with Tourette's were scary or any different from anyone else.
We talked about it at times but honestly, given that it had been an integral part of our lives for so long that we didn't even like talking about it. We had our careers, YouTube, recording together, trips around the world and banter with our friends- our conditions really wasn't a huge connecting point for us. Sure, it gave us something more in common, but we were still best friends either way.
"I can't wait!" Lachlan grinned, swinging his legs. "Only two more weeks and then I'll be in- up- London!" He ticked a couple of times, arms and shoulders jerking and interrupting his sentence, but I completely ignored it. He couldn't help it.
"Yeah." I laughed. "God, it's been ages. How long's it been since I was in Australia?"
"Over a year." He said, glancing down at his phone- probably looking at photos from our last trip. I had loved it, spending time with him in his home country as he showed me around. It had been autumn too, the perfect temperature. Now he was finally coming up to London and after over a year apart, we would finally be back together. "It's gonna been amazing."
"Yeah. It's gonna be."
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"Lachlan!" I shrieked, throwing myself into his arms as he dropped his suitcase to do the same. He squeezed me tight and whispered into my ear, mumbling oh my god, oh my god again and again. He was exactly as I remembered him, tall, lanky and happy as could be. "Oh my god, I've been waiting so long to see you."
"Same to you." He replied happily. I led him to my car in the car park but he didn't let go of my hand, swinging it back and forth while dragging his suitcase and singing. Yeah, exactly as he had been a year before. I noticed his tics every now and again, words or meaningless noises, full body jerks, and people stared but Lachlan didn't care. He skipped beside me, swung my arm and chattered away like we hadn't seen each other in forever. Of course, a year was forever.
Once at home there wasn't much to do other than curl up side by side on my bed and bask in the others presence. I had missed him so much and he must have missed me too because he clung like a koala, burying his head into my side and his tics slowed as he fell asleep. They still happened, only abating when he slipped into deeper stages of sleep. It was the same with me.
"I missed you so much Lachy." I mumbled, squeezing him tight in a hug. He giggled, hugging me right back.
"I missed you too Vikk." He breathed. "So, so much. I wish it could stay like this forever."
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Obviously the Sidemen knew about Lachlan's diagnosis. They knew about me and gave approximately zero shits about it so their meeting of Lachlan went well. He was nervous and was thus ticking more than usual, but they didn't care. They just greeted him, introduced themselves and went on with their lives. There would be more time to properly get to know each other in the coming weeks but for now Lachlan and I wanted to spend our days together, making the most of our time together.
"Let's go!" I yelled up the stairs to Lachlan, laughing as his bouncing footsteps could be heard as he bounded down the stairs. He almost fell down them actually, landing beside me with a grin while I had almost reached out to grab him, almost giving me a heart attack. "Jesus Christ Lachlan, don't fall down the stairs!"
"Eh, it's whatever." He grinned. "Let's go! I wanna get out and see London!"
Throughout the afternoon, I noticed the stares people gave us as we wandered around. I took Lachlan to most of the real touristy sites around the city and he adored it, but he didn't seem to notice both the locals and the actual tourists glancing over at us with every tic. It was pretty stand out- shouted words, jerking, noises- so I understood the staring, but it still made me uncomfortable. I was used to being able to hide my condition, Lachlan... not so much. It seemed he embraced it.
I knew he knew I was watching him, and he knew what it was about too. He didn't talk to me about it in public, but once we got home I knew what was coming. He glanced at me, head tilted.
"You're not quite so used to that, are you?" He asked, smiling. "The staring."
"No. I'm so used to being able to hide it to stop people looking at me." I sighed, rubbing my forehead. "It's so... different. We have the same thing, but you can't suppress it the way that I can."
"But I've had years to get used to it."
"Mm." I didn't really know what to say. "Does it ever bother you?"
"Of course. Of course it bothers me, but I've learned not to focus on it. I don't mind when the little ones stare, they can't help it, but when the adults stare it sometimes makes me uncomfortable. I've just tried to block it out and forget about it. I can't suppress it, I can't stop it, so there's nothing else to do. I've stopped letting it get to me." He gave me a smile. "It's just apart of my life."
Reaching out to me, he pulled me into a tight hug.
"It's alright, I promise. People stare because they're curious, because they don't understand. There's nothing we can do other than embrace it."
"I guess that makes sense." I mumbled, clinging right back. "But I'm self conscious-"
"It's okay. People stare. I don't mind anymore." Lachlan smiled, running a gentle hand through my hair. "We aren't so different Vikk, but it doesn't bother me. One day, it won't bother you either."
"It really doesn't feel like it..."
"You will. I promise."