I ENTERED THE house as quietly as I could and I tiptoed to the stairs. My attempt to be stealthy didn't last too long when the lights suddenly turned on.
"Where have you been?" Mom stepped forward. She was still dressed in her work clothes, a glass of white wine in her hand.
"I was out."
"I got an interesting call from Holden's father. You broke his nose?"
I rolled my eyes. "He deserved it."
"How many times do I have to tell you that violence isn't the answer?"
"What about when Brenton beat up James at school?" I refuted.
Mom's eyes widened at the newfound information, but that only amplified her anger towards me. "I told you nicely not to see James anymore."
"Nicely?" I laughed dryly. "You forbade me."
"Yet you didn't listen." She paused. "As of this moment, if you wish to live under my roof you can't speak to, look at, or even think of James. Understood?"
I looked at her incredulously. "You're ridiculous."
"Don't talk back to me, Daniella. Understood?" Mom yelled. Her change in tone took me by surprise. Mom never yelled. She had many questionable traits, but no matter what she always kept her composure...until now.
"It all makes sense now."
She raised her eyebrows. "Excuse me?"
"There's a reason Dad left and now I know what the reason was." I looked her in the eyes. "You."
A range of emotions flashed through her eyes, but no words came out. I didn't want to waste another second of my time with her, so I turned around and went upstairs to my room. I slammed my door shut and fell onto my bed. I chomped hard on my lower lip to keep my tears at bay. First Holden messed things up with James and me, and now this? Sometimes it seemed like the world purposely tried to ruin anything good in my life.
On that happy note, I forced myself to sleep, already anticipating a night without slumber.
~*~
"Hey."
Without a response, I shut my locker door and turned to face Amber. She opened her arms and I fell right into her embrace, letting her warmth consume me. I texted her everything that happened last night in hopes she could cheer me up.
"How are you feeling?" she asked.
I shrugged. "Like absolute shit."
We started walking to our biology class. "Are you sure you want to go today?"
"I can't skip, Amber."
Part of me hoped James wouldn't come to class today, yet another part of me prayed he'd be sitting in his seat when I entered the classroom. I wanted to talk to him so badly, even if just for a minute to give him my side of the story. Things were going so well between us and I didn't want to end what we had before it even started.
I took in a deep breath as I stepped into the room. My eyes locked in on his empty seat and I felt myself deflate. He wasn't coming. Amber rubbed my arm sympathetically before taking her seat. Considering I came this far I figured I might as well stay for the entire class.
"Good morning, class," Mrs. Frazer said as she stepped into the room. "Please take out your textbooks and open them to chapter eight. Today we will be discussing the urinary and excretory system."
"Great," I grumbled.
As if my life wasn't already going to shit, now I had to learn about it too for the next hour.
"Before we begin this lesson, I want you all to turn to the person behind you and do the diagnostic quiz together at the beginning of the chapter," she added.
I glanced at the empty desk behind me. Today was just getting worse and worse.
~*~
That day and the few days after that all dragged the same. I barely talked to anyone, I ate dinner alone in my room, and I wore the same pair of sweatpants that entire week. James still hadn't responded to my phone calls or texts, and I had no idea where he was.
I was sitting at my desk, eating my now cold takeout as I worked on an assignment for my psychology class. The only positive —if any— that came out of James' absence was with all this free time and my newfound antisocial tendencies, I was able to get a bulk of my school work completed. That didn't mean the quality of the work was actually good per se, it just meant I had this shit done on time. I was in the middle of reading about Piaget's theories when there was a knock on my door.
"Not now, Alex," I said without looking away from my textbook.
"It's not Alex."
My eyebrows shot up when it was Brenton who entered my room. We were still not on speaking terms, and I didn't plan on ending that anytime soon.
"Can we talk?"
I focused back on my textbook. "No."
"Dani, I am so—"
"Save it for someone who cares."
"What I did was a mega dick move."
"I'm aware."
"I was just mad, I wasn't thinking and—"
"And you ruined something really great for me," I finished. "Thanks a lot. Goodbye."
Brenton sighed. "Please hear me out."
"How about you get out instead?"
"I made a mistake, and I really regret it. You're free to talk to whoever you want."
"Thanks for granting me my rights back," I deadpanned. "Now leave."
"Dan..."
"Get out."
Brenton gave me one last look before listening to my command and exiting my room. He had already done enough damage so his apology was virtually useless at this point.
~*~
A distant thud made my eyes open ever so slightly. I was so tired, I just pulled my blanket over my head and went back to sleep. This was followed by the sound of a door slamming, but I just ignored it. I was hoping whoever was being inconsiderate this late at night would find it in the goodness of their heart to shut the hell up and let the rest of us sleep. The noises progressed and although they weren't as loud as before, they were still loud enough to disturb my sleep.
Unable to deal with this nuisance for a second more, I got out of bed. I slipped on a sweater over my tank top and I was ready to go outside and give this person a piece of my mind. My mission to start a war with a stranger was suddenly halted when I noticed a beam of light shining from the window next door. I peered toward my window and glanced ahead. The curtains were open and the lights on. I heard shuffling and out of nowhere someone entered the picture. I let out a slight gasp at the sight before me — James was back.
He was in all his shirtless glory, making me want nothing more than to spend the entire night admiring him. His back was facing me so I figured now was the chance for me to start a conversation or retreat.
"You really shouldn't be so loud this late at night."
If there were any moment I could undo, it would have been this exact one. Of all things I could have possibly said, this was what I went with? James turned around, the coldness in his eyes visible as he glared at me. He was about to shut his window but I couldn't end the conversation so soon. Especially when I had no idea when he would return if he decided to leave again.
"Can we talk?"
"No."
I couldn't tell which had me more taken aback - James' harsh tone or the fact that I was getting severe déjà vu from my conversation with Brenton. Regardless, I had to talk to James. Even if he still hated me I needed him to know what really happened.
"I'm so sorry you had to see that," I continued. "But it wasn't my fault. Holden kissed me, not the other way around."
"I've heard enough," he dismissed.
"I tried to push him off but I couldn't. It wasn't until you came that I found a chance to get away from him."
"I saw what I saw," he said with a stoic expression. "Nothing changes the fact that the two of you kissed."
"I broke his nose."
James raised his eyebrows, so I continued talking now that I had gained his interest.
"I punched him for kissing me and I guess my punch was strong enough to cause a fracture."
"How about you go play nurse for him and leave me alone?" James began to shut his window but I couldn't let him go. I already gave him my entire explanation but it clearly wasn't enough to convince him to move past this.
Fresh out of ideas to make him stay, I let my stupidity and impulse take over. Without a second thought I stuck my leg out my window and climbed onto the windowsill outside. James was in the middle of closing his curtains, but when his gaze fell upon me his eyes widened and he quickly opened his window.
"What the hell's wrong with you? Get back inside before you fall!"
"I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me me." That was far easier said than done. A gust of wind blew past me, making me regret wearing shorts. My body was shivering and I already knew if I were out here for a few more minutes I would surely get sick.
"Get back inside," he repeated sternly.
"Will you talk to me?"
He didn't answer.
"Guess I'm staying out here then."
If James wasn't going to listen to me, then I was going to make him listen. As crazy as it sounded, I was going to his bedroom. That way he had no choice but to listen. I took in a deep breath and I extended my leg as far out as I could. It landed on James' windowsill, making my legs nearly do the splits. For someone who didn't have an ounce of flexibility in her body, this hurt like a bitch.
"Jesus, Dani get back inside before you hurt yourself," James pleaded.
I ignored him as I moved the rest of my body onto his windowsill. I lifted my left leg in midair and pivoted my right foot to make room for my leg. I made the mistake of looking down which made me feel nauseous. I didn't realize how high up I was until now... I continued moving, making sure I didn't mess up my footing. One slip up and I'd be in a neck brace for sure.
Just as my left leg was about to land, another strong surge of wind blew taking me by surprise and making me end up losing my balance. I tried to stick out my arms for support, but it was too late. I closed my eyes as I began to fall back, accepting my untimely but self-inflicted doom. Before I could fall, a pair of arms wrapped around my legs, holding me in place. James then grabbed my arms and pulled me into his room and right into his embrace.
"Don't ever do something so stupid again," he scolded.
"Does this mean we're okay now?" I asked, my voice muffled since my face was pressed against his chest.
I was notorious for saying the wrong things at the wrong time and this was yet another example. James dropped his arms and released his hold on me. My lips formed a frown, already missing his warmth.
"Take the stairs and leave," he said curtly.
"Wait, but I thought..."
"This is enough for one night. Please leave."
"No."
"Pardon?"
"I didn't climb all the way here and nearly break my neck for you to tell me to leave! I'm not leaving! You're going to listen to everything I—"
James clamped his hand over my mouth. "Shut up or you'll wake him."
"Wake who?"
"That's beyond the point. Just quietly leave," he begged.
"I can't leave knowing you hate me," I admitted. "I told you exactly what happened, and I can't even begin to express how sorry I am. I never meant to hurt you."
"You know what's funny?" I had a feeling this wasn't going to be funny at all. "When I started falling for you, I tried so damn hard to get rid of my feelings because I knew I was going to get hurt." He shook his head. "You're the only person I've ever liked this much, and you hurt me."
Hearing how broken he sounded made my heart ache. James didn't deserve this at all. "I'm so sorry," I choked out, trying to hold back my tears. "I promise I will never hurt you again."
"Don't make promises you can't keep."
"I will never hurt you again," I repeated in a firm voice.
"Please leave, Dani."
"I already told you I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me." To prove my point I laid down on his bed. I had to fight the urge to sniff his blanket and pillows. I was certain they smelled just like him.
"Are you seriously doing this right now?"
"I gave you the easy option. It's not my fault you didn't listen."
"I will call the cops."
"No, you won't."
"What makes you so sure?"
"You miss me as much as I miss you."
"I don't miss you."
"Say it to my face."
"I just did."
"Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't miss me."
James stared intently into my eyes. "I don't miss you."
Well, that backfired. I tried not to let my face give off any emotion. "I know you're lying."
"I'm not."
I got out of his bed and stood right in front of him. We were so close I could feel his breath fanning my face. "Tell me you don't miss me."
James looked down at his feet. "I don't miss you."
"Look me in the eyes and say it." I cupped his cheek, letting my hand linger longer than necessary. James' eyes fluttered shut and he wrapped his fingers around my wrist.
"Dani," he whispered. "Promise you won't hurt me again?"
"I promise."
"Good." James closed the distance between us and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he grabbed onto my thighs, lifting me up. He dropped me onto his bed and climbed on top of me while still kissing me, not missing a beat. When we pulled apart, James placed kisses up and down my neck. "I missed you so damn much," he said between kisses.
I ran my fingers through his hair. "Don't leave again."
He kissed me gently. "I won't." James laid down on his back and I curled up beside him, resting my head on his chest. He wrapped his arm around me, pulling me close to him. My lips curved up into a smile as I engulfed his scent. "Sleep," he whispered.
"Goodnight, James."
"Goodnight, Dani."
A/N: seeing a lot of James slander in the comments (which is totally ok + I agree) but it's important to remember he's a dumb, impulsive teenager too !!