Chapter Song: Dirty Paws by Of Monsters And Men
~Track 8 on 'Songs To Fall Asleep To' (made by Webster)
Alex
He was in a good moods on the drive to Lorraine's house. The sun was shining, his window was open, Webster's playlist was blaring. He had never really been into Of Monsters and Men before, but he just couldn't get enough of them at the moment.
He had decided to give his girlfriend a surprise visit, due to the fact that all she ever did was complain about how he wasn't a very sentimental boyfriend. He hummed as he pulled up outside Lorraine's house. There was red sports car parked outside of it.
Hm.
That's weird.
He certainly didn't remember Lorriane having a red sports car.
Maybe she had got a raise at work?
He turned off the radio and jumped out of his car, his mind suddenly clouded. He marched up to the door and started to rummage around in his jacket for his house key. It took him a good thirty seconds to find it, and when he did find the key, it was attached to a polaroid picture of him and Webster.
He was not in the mood for this right now.
He unlocked the door and stepped inside, only to be met with the sound of someone giggling.
"Jaaaaack. Oh my god." a voice squealed.
He knew that voice.
It was Lorraine's.
"Shhhhh baby. I got you."
There was no mistaking it.
That was Jack's voice.
He stormed towards where the disgusting moans were coming from, his heart racing. She wouldn't do it. Not behind his back. She loved him, didn't she? She had said it before. He had said it before.
SMACK!
The door whacked against the wall as Alex stepped into the living room.
Disappointment. Hurt. Betrayal. Pain.
A million ugly emotions spread through his body as he looked at his girlfriend and his best friend lying on the couch with half of their clothes off.
She reacted first by pushing Jack off her and jumping up, her eyes wide with disbelief.
"A-Alex." she stammered, her lips trembling. He had always admired Lorraine's body, he was never one to turn away when she was half naked in front of him.
But at the moment he couldn't look at her at all.
"Alex man, you-"
"SHUT UP!" he roared, his temper exploding, his pain becoming too much.
His skunk-haired man fell silent. He grabbed Lorriane and pushed her behind him.
"What is this?" he demanded. He was so close to tears now.
No.
He wouldn't cry in front of them,
"Why?" he asked coolly, his eyes finally flicking up to his girlfriend. She sighed and stepped out from behind Jack.
"Look, Alex....don't take this in the wrong way, alright? I...I never really loved you Alex. I thought that all we were going to be was a one night stand, but when you didn't leave...well...I didn't want to break it to you. The thing was, I was already into someone else...." she trailed off and looked up at Jack who kissed her cheek gently.
Alex nearly threw up.
"So all this was a lie? All the times you said you loved me....all the times I kissed you...it was all a game?" he asked, his voice like ice.
She shrugged.
"I did love you for a while Alex, it just wasn't real."
It just wasn't real.
His throat was dry, his hands were clenched into tight fists by his sides. His life was spiralling out of control. This wasn't supposed to happen to him.
This wasn't how it worked.
Too deep. He had fallen in too deep, his head had been fooled into thinking he had found the one. He had been played like a board game. He had been a pawn in Lorraine's chess game.
He had loved someone who had never loved him back.
He felt a cold feeling spread through his veins.
She had broke him.
But never again.
Never again would he ever let anyone in. Never again will he let himself get too close to anyone.
It hurt too much.
It hurt because it had been real.
Webster
When she wheeled out of her speech therapy and saw Alex marching down the road, her heart skipped a beat, but then it started to slow down when she saw the expression on his face. He looked mad, his footsteps were heavy, like he was dragging his feet more so than lifting them, and his eyes were staring down at the ground.
Something was wrong.
She found herself wheeling towards him.
"Alex!" she yelled, not a stutter to be heard in her voice (thanks to today lesson with Doctor Benson).
"Alex!"
He looked up, his usually shining hazel eyes like two large black pools.
He froze when he saw her and blinked straight ahead, staring at her like she was a stranger. She wheeled on and smiled at him.
"HI. ARE YOU ALRIGHT?" she typed cautiously.
He ignored her and walked on, leaving her alone. What was up with him? Was he ignoring her again? He had no reason to though! She hadn't even done anything! She had never actually done anything wrong to him!
It was time for him to take his head out of his ass.
She wheeled quickly, and when she caught up with him, she wheeled in front of him, blocking his path and making him stop.
This was it. She was tired of Alex foregetting about her, ignoring her and using her. She was done with the boy with the playlists. She was about to tell him exactly how she felt about him right now.
"ALEX WHY-"
"Look, Webster, I can't deal with this right now, alright? I just found out that Lorraine has been fucking my best friend behind my back for, God knows how long? We'll talk later, I promise." he said tiredly, cutting her off, mid-sentence. He attemted to push past her, but she wheeled in front of him, anger boiling in the depths of her stomach. She then let her angry words spill on to her keyboard.
"PROMISE? HOW CAN YOU EVEN STILL USE THAT WORD?" she practically punched into her laptop.
He sighed and stopped trying to push past her.
She took this as an opportunity to go on.
"HOW MANY BROKEN PROMISES HAVE YOU MADE TO ALL YOUR EX-LOVERS ALEX? HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU PROMISED SOMEONE THAT YOU WOULD STAY?"
"Shut up Webster! Alright? I am not in the mood!" he snapped at her, his voice dripping with venom.
She blinked as she felt her glasses start to fog up. He had just told her to shut up. When had he ever said that to her before? He had said that he loved her god damned computer voice.
Lies.
Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies.
She swallowed back her the lump in her throat and went on, channelling her pain into her words.
"WELL, DIDN'T YOU KIND OF CHEAT ON HER WITH ME? YOU DID KISS ME YOU KNOW." she typed bitterly.
"That was nothing." he said, his voice cold and clear.
She took a sharp breath.
"SO WHEN YOU KISSED ME, IT WAS NOTHING? JUST ANOTHER HOOK UP THEN?" Tears were stinging in her eyes. It felt like he had just kicked her in the stomach.
She actually would have preferred if he had kicked her in the stomach.
The pain would be less.
"What, did the kiss mean more to you Webster?" he asked nastily.
"NO. IT WAS JUST A KISS." She lied, her fingers were starting to slip off the keyboard they are trembling that much.
"SOMETIMES I WONDER WHY YOU DID IT THOUGH. WHY DID YOU KISS ME ALEX? WAS IT BECAUSE YOU LIKED ME?"
To her surprise, he laughed bitterly and gave her a dark look.
"You want to know why I kissed you Webster? Fine, but you asked for it. I kissed you because I felt sorry for you. I wanted you to know what it felt like to kiss somebody because no one kisses girls in wheelchairs. It's just how it is. People pity you Webster, and I know you don't like it when people do, but what you don't understand is that people have to pity you, because that's how the world fucking is," he paused, then went on.
"Today I realised that this world is a fucking let down, full of people ready to screw you over."
He looked at her sadly.
"And maybe you were another one of God's pawns, coming to screw me over, just like Lorraine. Maybe you were just another soul sent to break me."
Webster felt tears drip down her face.
So she really had meant nothing to him after all.
She was just another pawn in his chess game.
Using the last of the anger that she could muster, she wiped away her tears with her sleeve and started to type.
"YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A SAD MAN WHO DROWNS HIS SORROWS WITH DRINK WHEN HIS GIRLFRIEND HAS HAD ENOUGH OF HIM. YOU'RE NOT A MAN ALEX, YOU'RE A MONSTER AND I WISH I HAD NEVER MET YOU." her words were the bitter truth laced with lies. She knew deep down she was glad that she had met him , but the demons in her head were telling her that this was what he deserved.
And the sad thing was.
His words were just as true as hers.
But her words were making an impact on him, she saw the hurt register on his face. Then suddenly, he narrowed his eyes at her, making her shrink back into her wheelchair.
"You know what Webster? At least I'm able to carry on with my life. At least I'm not afraid to accept the truth of reality. At least I'm able to stand fot myself, unlike you, who can't even stand at all."
That was the last straw. He had played the last and most cruelest card of them all.
The disabled card.
His words played through his head like a broken record, a scratched playlist.
"At least I'm able to stand for myself, unlike you, who can't even stand at all."
Alex
She was gone before he could even realise what he had just said.
Shit.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
He had gone too far,
He had played the disabled card against her.
Shit.
"Webster wait!" he yelled, tearing down the street after her.
Webster
"Webster wait!"
He was trying to call her back. No way was she going to stop and let that mosnter catch up to her. She knew if she let him catch up, she'd fall for his disguise again.
She couldn't afford to do that again.
"Webster please!"
His words only made her wheel faster and faster. People were jumping out of her way, cursing after her, but she was beyond caring. All that mattered was getting away from Alex.
"Webster stop!"
His voice was fading. She would definitely lose him at the crossroads.
"WEBSTER NO!"
Do it.
She was in the middle of the road, heck, she was nearly on the other side! Only a few more pushes and-
The sound of a speeding car.
An incredible feeling of pain.
And then nothing.
Nothing.