Past
Victoria
I should have just left the diary alone.
Wouldn't I be pissed if someone read my diary without my knowledge? I knew I would so I had no right to do this to Tyler.
He'd kept this diary a secret for years, not even Archer was aware of what was written inside it. Maya would have certainly been last on the list to read it. While I had no clue what he wrote inside it, I knew that it was part of his therapy and that his mom had asked him to do it. Reading Tyler's diary would be like opening a Pandora box. The pages inside could be reciting his deepest, darkest thoughts, secrets, and things that I'd always wanted to find out about him, and truthfully, I wasn't sure if I wanted to do this.
Not only would I be invading his privacy, but also breaking his trust. And against my better judgment, I was about to take that step.
The temptation was hard to resist.
Once I started reading the diary, there would be no turning back. I couldn't just unsee or bleach my mind of whatever that was in it.
How bad could it be anyway?
Maybe animal sacrifices or joining some weird-ass punk gang or even running a satanic cult? Although I could imagine Tyler being part of the latter.
What if he had cheated on me and wrote about that?
I could sit here and keep guessing until I went mad or I could just flip through these pages and get over it. I'd deal with it later.
I opened the book and flipped through the first page.
Just then I heard the sounds of footsteps approaching so I closed the diary, made a run towards my bag lying near the bed, and slipped the diary inside it.
Tyler walked inside the room holding a tray filled with food and two tall glasses of flavored milk. "What's up, Mommy?" He eyed me warily as he placed the food on the bed, "Something wrong?"
"Nothing," I said quickly, acting natural.
The last thing I needed was to act strangely and have Tyler think that something was fishy.
He ate a piece of kiwi from the fruit bowl, still analyzing me with those smoldering blue eyes, "If you say so."
"I...I need to get going home," I said.
His brow arched up, "So soon? I assumed we were having dinner together."
"Well, you assume a lot of things, don't you?" I didn't regret that I was being snarky.
He fed Snowball a piece of cabbage and grinned, "Are pregnant women usually this moody?"
I swear I wanted to smack that grin off his face and kiss him at the same time. "It's my first time so I wouldn't know."
He snaked an arm around my waist and pulled me against him, I gasped at the suddenness of his actions. His other hand went up to tangle in my hair and his gaze never wavered from mine, "Are you trying to hide something from me?"
I kept my face neutral because Ty was a pro at reading faces and I needed to be careful about not letting him find out about his stolen diary. "What would I be hiding from you?" I whispered, maintaining the eye-contact.
"I don't know, Vicky. I think you're always looking for trouble."
I rolled my eyes. "Do I need to keep reminding you that I'm going to be the mother of your baby? My rebellious days are already behind me, Genius."
He locked me in his embrace, his hand running up and down my sides, and his fingers stopped right over my breasts and he gave my left one a nice squeeze and the desire hit me. "If it were up to me, I'd keep you pregnant all year round and we'd make about ten or fifteen of these."
"Perv," I laughed, "I bet you even have a cave somewhere."
"Stay the night with me," he said, giving me those puppy eyes.
There was an inner joke between Archer and me, and I'm sure Tyler knew about it. Archer called him my Golden Retriever seeing as he would follow me everywhere, not wanting to leave me alone for even one minute even after he was done with school.
"I can't do that, Ty," I said sweetly, not wanting to reject him outright.
"Why not?"
He just didn't take no for an answer.
"Your dad's home and it wouldn't be nice for me to stay over when he's here."
"I can handle my dad, and you're just making excuses, Vicky. We won't do anything if that's what you're worried about. I only plan to hold you when we sleep." He promised, and a beat later said, "Okay, fine. I'll just touch you a little. Your breasts, that's it."
I wished I could stay the night but then I would have to keep the diary back in its original place. This was a one-time opportunity that I didn't want to pass. I'd been curious about the contents of it for years. Maybe I'd just read a few pages and return it into the drawers.
"My mom would get mad." I made another excuse.
"I can talk to her." He reached towards my phone. "I know she's just tolerating me for now and tries to brainwash you with the stories that the townies gossip about my family but there's nothing she can do about it because I plan to stick around for a long time. And if she wants to be in the kid's life, she better be a good grandmother, one that bakes chocolate chip cookies and banana bread."
I laughed, "I feel so lucky to have you in my life."
"I have a surprise I want to show you." He told me.
The surprise turned out to be a room with a cozy little crib filled with stuffed toys. The crib had golden poles and cushioned sides, and little birds suspended from the top.
It was adorable.
I stared at the room in wonder.
"What's wrong, Mommy?" Tyler teased, "You seem like you're at a loss of words."
"I love it, Ty. It's so beautiful."
"I figured that after we're married you'd want to visit your family sometimes so the baby will have his own room. That used to be my crib, by the way. Mom didn't let it go for auction when I grew older and I thought I should put it to use now."
I looked up at him, and what I said next is what I believed in my heart, "I couldn't have asked for a better father for my baby. And I'm not saying that because of all this. I genuinely believe that."
He appeared to be a little guilty, but I didn't understand why. "Stay with me tonight." He repeated.
* * *
Even after making tons of excuses, Tyler managed to get his way, and I had to stay over the night. We watched a movie for a while and then went to bed. Ty slept in his boxer shorts, his body snuggled up against mine, and his hand was spayed around my stomach.
It was in a difficult position to get out of, but I still managed to get his arm untangled from my body. I listened to his breathing and realized he was in a deep sleep. I watched him from my side for a few minutes, just to see if he would twitch or move but he lay there sleeping peacefully.
I moved a little and picked up the diary from underneath the bag. There was enough light coming from the French windows and I knew I could read something.
The disappointment I felt when I opened the diary was colossal. The only thing written in the diary was a long essay on the types of snakes and the countries they come from and other information.
The rest of the diary was blank.
He stirred in bed, turning towards me and I dropped the diary on the carpeted floor.
Ty looked at me with sleepy eyes and still managed to look gorgeous as hell. "What's wrong, baby? Why are you awake?"
"Just couldn't sleep." I lied.
He ran a hand through his hair, "Want me to get you anything?"
I shook my head and slipped back inside the covers and buried my face in his chest, inhaling his familiar ocean cologne mixed with his body scent. "I'm good right here."
He kissed the top of my head.
In the morning, I had to endure breakfast with Tyler's dad. It was kind of awkward, maybe because he knew I'd spent the night with Tyler and now that I was pregnant, parents from both sides didn't seem to have a problem with us sleeping together. It was kind of like them thinking, 'He already knocked her up, what's the worst that can happen now?'
"Did you sleep well, Victoria?" Jasper Lockhart asked me from across the table, pouring himself more coffee.
"Yes, sir," I answered.
"When are you due?"
"In June," I answered.
"Ty said I could take care of the baby on the weekends and I can visit their new house in Connecticut whenever I want." Maya grinned at me, "If it's a girl, Vicky is going to let me dress her up the way I want. Daddy, I ordered matching ribbons from Italy for every outfit for the baby. I hope her hair is white silver like Vicky's, she would look so pretty."
Maya's excitement for becoming an aunt had no bounds and she had already suggested me names. She'd also gone on a baby clothing shopping spree like she was going to get a brand new talking-walking doll or something. I smiled to myself.
"That's nice, Honey," he smiled in her direction and then turned towards me, "That's a month from now," He said bringing my attention back to the table. "And you're planning to get married and move to the mansion in Connecticut?"
I shrugged, and I didn't have to look to tell that Tyler who was sitting across from me was holding his breath for what I was about to say.
There was no reason for me to lie.
"Yes, sir."
"Is that what you want?" Mr. Lockhart's steel-blue eyes leveled with mine.
"Yeah," I said.
"I already discussed everything with Vicky, Dad." That was Tyler, and his voice had an undertone of warning towards me. "When she and I turn eighteen, we're moving out. She's going to care for the baby, and I'm working for you, besides, she wouldn't be able to attend college with a newborn."
Jasper pinned Tyler with a hard stare, "I'm sure your girlfriend is quite capable of answering my questions without you meddling in between, son. Tell me the truth, Victoria. Ignore Tyler, tell me what's in your heart. You do want to get married to Tyler, don't you?"
"Yes," I said without hesitation. "But I would like to stay here, at least for a year."
"Then that's what you'll be doing." Mr. Lockhart said. "My son is selfish and he's manipulating you with his decision because he doesn't want to live under the same roof as me. It doesn't have anything to do with you. He saw an opportunity with you, a way out of here and he took it."
I heard the loud scraping of a chair, "Vicky, I'm going to school, I'll drop you home on the way, you coming or what?"
His tone promised that hell would break loose if I didn't move from here.
"Thank you for breakfast, Mr. Lockhart."
"Call me Jasper." He smiled, "After all, we're going to be family soon."
When we sat inside the car, I heard the deadly silence. Maya was in the backseat.
"Why did you do that?" He asked angrily, clenching the steering wheel hard.
"Do what?"
"Why did you tell him that you wanted to stay here? I thought we were over that last time I came to your place. You agreed to move with me after we're married."
"He can see right through you. It doesn't matter what I said."
"My father is a killer, Vicky. You gonna take the word from a killer?"
"STOOOOPPPPP!" Maya screeched in the backseat. "The baby's gonna listen to everything!"
It's like the magic from yesterday had vanished, tainted once again by Tyler's stubbornness.
"Your house is here." He said softly.
"Please don't be mad at him, Vicky," Maya begged me. "My brother's a psycho."
"Maya." He warned her softly.
I gave her a weak smile and stepped out of the car.
* * *
I'd brought the diary along with me. It was stupid of me to risk doing it but I'd acted on impulse when Tyler had gone in the bathroom for a shower. If he found out that the diary was gone, he'd hunt me down. And before that happened, I needed to read it as much as possible.
Even though the pages were blank, I knew there had to be some valid explanation for that. The Tyler I knew wouldn't leave things written in plain sight. I raised the pages of the empty diary to the room light but couldn't see anything.
I found a dropper and filled a glass of water and brought them to the study table. I opened the first page and sprinkled a few drops of water on the first two pages, but nothing happened. Then I flipped to the middle of the diary and repeated the same thing.
Finally, I gave up and went to bed.
When I woke up in the morning, it was like the pages had come to life.
I'd hit a gold-mine.
The pages that I'd dropped the water on were now filled with words in what I recognized to be Tyler's beautiful cursive handwriting.
Hi Diary,
I have a few confessions I need to make. I'm sure you're not going to like them, but hell, I'm going to tell you anyway. I'm writing this with an invisible pen so I might not be writing in a disciplined straight line. There's another diary that I've been writing for therapy, the one that my mom regularly checks, but that one's got some serious edited shit going on with it. You know, kind of like a horror movie with an R rated version and a PG-13. Mom thinks there's just one of these, I have two though. There are some things that I don't think my mom would like to read, and I'd like to save her from the trauma that the uncut version will be. This one's going to be between you and me, Diary.
***
Apologies for the late update, I've been dealing with some personal stuff lately, and plus I lost my fur baby yesterday :(
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