I Wish... (A JB fanfic)

Chapter 24

Chapter song: My Love is Like a Star by Demi Lovato
(Justin's pov)
-3 days later-
There's a problem. There's a very very big problem. I dropped My World 2 days ago. Scooter said that the album was a big hit. Plus, I've already finished 2 songs of my next album. The problem is that he said I'm going on tour. Tour!! That means I have to leave from June 2010 to October 2011. That's almost a year! What would Becca say?! Dammit, she would hate me. There's no way her parents would let her go with me. Plus, I have to leave 5 months earlier to get all set up. That leaves me about a month with Becca. I can't survive without her. I don't have a choice. I have to go on tour, especially for my fans, my beliebers. Becca's gonna be pissed, angry, sad because of me. I can't let that happen. She's everything to me. If I can't handle 3 days, I definitely can't handle more than a year. Fuck. This is very bad, very horrible. I'm so mad yet so sorry. I can't explain how I'm feeling exactly. It's like moving away from a house you've lived in all your life. It's like learning another language. I can't adapt to a life without Becca. It's impossible.
"We're here, Justin"
Mom said as the jet landed. Dammit, how am I gonna tell Becca? I walked slow, so I could rehearse how I'm gonna break this to Becca. We drove to my house, and I unpacked my stuff. I grabbed the small box that contained a special gift for Becca. It's a bracket that had light pink diamonds on it. Becca had said she liked it a couple years ago at the mall. I decided to get it for her. I also grabbed another box, containing a new iPhone for her. I sighed and knocked on Becca's front door.
"Hey Justin, come in"
Becca's mom welcomed me in.
"Thank you"
I had to use my manners, especially with Becca's mom. When I opened Becca's bedroom door, I saw Becca on her phone.
"Guess who?"
I covered her eyes, making her gasp.
"Uhm...Justin?"
She giggled.
"Correct"
I kissed her cheek.
"Omigod, it is you! I missed you so much!"
Becca hugged me.
"I missed you too, baby"
I kissed her and hugged back.
"I bought your album exactly 6 times"
She beamed proudly.
"Aw, you didn't have to"
I smiled and kissed her again.
"But I wanted to"
She grinned adorably.
"Well, I appreciate it, babe. You wanna go to the park?"
I have to go somewhere where Becca can let her anger out.
"Ok"
She smiled and followed me out of her house. We hurried through the woods and into the park.
"Are you hungry?"
I was hoping she was, so I didn't have to tell her now.
"Nah, I just ate my mom's terrible sandwiches"
She rolled her eyes.
"I got you something"
I handed her the small box that had the bracelet.
"oh shit, Justin, no way!"
Her eyes lit up, and her smiled grew happier. It almost made me smile too, but I remembered that it wouldn't last much longer.
"Uhm, Becca...I need to tell you something"
I lowered my voice. Her expression changed to concerned, and she sat beside me on the playground.
"What is it?"
Her voice lowered as well.
"Well, you know how my album's out, right?..."
I looked at her in guilt. She nodded, tucking her bottom lip under her teeth.
"...My manger said that it's a great success, and...I have...to go on tour"
I looked away, so I didn't see her reaction.
"...Tour?...You mean, around the world?"
Her voice was shaky.
"...Yea"
I mumbled.
"How-how long?"
She stuttered as her voice broke.
"I've got to leave in January and return by the beginning of 2012"
I hoped she understood.
"...No...no, Justin, I won't let you. You can't leave me here"
Her voice cracked and crumbled.
"Becca...it wasn't my choice"
I leaned close to her.
"Stop. Justin, you promised. Why would you say-"
"Becca, calm down"
I stopped her from screaming.
"No! You can't leave like this!"
She started to cry.
"Becca, I'm sorry. I didn't know"
I held her tight.
"Justin...no...you...you"
She looked alarmed and breath taken. Soon enough, I realized that her breath was actually taken. Oh shit. She was having a panic attack!
"Becca, Becca, breathe, shawty"
I held her close. She was breathing hard and shaking.
"As long as you love me We could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke
As long as you love me
I'll be your platinum, I'll be your silver, I'll be your gold
As long as you lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-love me (love me)
As long as you lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-lo-love me (love me)"
I sung calmly in her ear. Her breathing returned to normal, and her shaking slowed down.
"It's ok, baby"
Damn, I shouldn't have told her that.
"Please don't go, Justin...please"
The hurt in her voice made me feel like I was shot in the chest.
"...Becca, I have to. Think about what I've become. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. If I don't go, I'll be letting so many people down"
I tried to convince her that everything's ok.
"But you'll be letting me down"
She mumbled.
"Hey...distance doesn't matter. I know I'll be on your mind as much as you're on mine. It'll be ok. I promise"
I dried her eyes, but she continued crying.
"But-but I need you. My life is a mess without you. I feel so alone and-and I-"
"Shh, I know, babygirl. But it's gonna be ok. You're not alone. I'm not leaving forever. Just cos you can't see me, doesn't mean I don't love you"
I let her cry on my shoulder.
"It feels like it"
She mumbled and sniffled.
"... it'll go by fast"
I rocked her gently while planting small kisses on her neck.
"I don't care. I need you so much"
Becca whimpered.
"Hey, I've got something for you"
I handed her the other box. When she opened it, her expression turned happy again, but I could still see the pain in her eyes.
"Another phone?!"
She grinned.
"Yea, your parents can't find out about this. It's to contact me when I'm gone, ok?"
I pressed our foreheads together. She nodded and closed her eyes, letting a teardrop slide down her cheek.
"I'm not leaving yet. I still have a month to spend with you"
I wiped the tear away and kissed her temple.
"I don't wanna waste a second with out you"
She sniffled.
"And you won't. Let's get some hot chocolate, shall we?"
I smiled and took her hand.
"Ok"
Becca grabbed my arm and tucked herself close to me.