Chapter Twenty-Seven
My mother hasn't come up to apologize, and I'm grateful for it. I don't expect her to, but everything she's done today has been out of character for her.
The sun has set, and Jace had brought Cousin some of his old clothing, which I happily accepted. When he returned home, I sat on my bed for the first time in what feels like years. Cousin hasn't moved from the same spot on the floor since he arrived here, and I wasn't sure why. I'm scared he will regress back to sitting all day, and I don't want that. His body has finally been getting used to moving, and he needs to keep exercising, or he will get weak again.
There's a knock on my door, and both my eyes, and Cousin's stare at it, cautiously. "It's me, Bexley." Katie's voice is a relief to hear, as I stand up and unlock the door letting her in, before locking it again.
She's holding two plates. One plate has two sandwiches on it, and the other plate has just one. "I brought us some dinner." She says, though it were obvious.
I smile, "Thank you."
I watch her set the plate with the single sandwich on it in front of Cousins, and then walk over to my bed where her and I both sit down, and grab a sandwich of our own.
We eat in silence, but I notice Katie's eyes keep darting to Cousin, "Does he not like it?" She's referring to him not eating, and I shake my head.
"It's hard to get him to eat anything, really."
There's a frown on her face, and she just stares at him, studying him. After a long, quiet moment she speaks, "He's been through a lot, hasn't he." She doesn't say it like a question, but more like a statement. I only nod.
"He's nothing but bones and scars." She says, turning to me, "He needs professional help. He needs a doctor, a physical therapist, a psychiatrist, and years of therapy."
"I know." I sigh, "But I don't know how to get him it."
She nods, "I think I do."
"How?"
"I can get you a job where I work." Katie goes from school to school tutoring kids in math. "You've always been good at English and grammar, tutoring a bunch of middle schoolers will be nothing to you. I also know how you can make some money writing essays online for inept college students. It pays well enough that if you keep doing it, you should be able to afford a small, albeit rundown, apartment."
The hope in my chest dies, "I can't."
She looks at me, surprised, "Why not?"
I don't know how to sugarcoat it, and I see no point in doing so. "I can't leave him alone."
Her eyes narrow, "He's not a child, Bexley, he can stand to be alone for a few hours."
"He tried to kill himself. He begged me to do it." I know he's listening, but I had to tell her. If she had an idea on how he is, maybe she'd understand better.
It does it's job in silencing her, though. Her eyes widen a bit, and her shoulders slump, "Oh." Is all she said, and I say nothing at all.
Her eyes move back to him, and he's glaring up at her. He looks as though he's ready to attack her, and I don't know how to console him.
My sister obviously notices his look, and speaks directly to him, "I would never hurt you." She says it in a tone so gentle as though she were calming a baby, "I hope you come to understand that one day. I'm on your side."
He doesn't seem to care. In fact I think her talking to him puts him even more on edge. I notice him clench his fists, and I wonder, for a second, if he really is going to jump and attack her.
The room is tense, and finally, Katie does what I hope she'd do, she grabs the empty plate between us, and stands up, "I'll leave you two alone then. It seems I'm not welcome here." She gives me a sad smile, "We'll work through this, Bexley. I'll keep mom busy. Just keep that boy hidden."
"I will."
She nods, "Goodnight, I love you so much, you know that?"
I run up and hug her, "Goodnight, I love you too."
She leaves, and I lock the door behind her. When I turn back to Cousin he's staring at the door as if he wanted to burn it down. I notice that Jace's clothes are extremely big on him, being that Jace is definitely a muscular, bigger guy. I also notice that he hasn't touched the sandwich at all. I sigh, and walk over to him, sitting beside him.
"You need to eat." I tell him, "If you want to get out of here, you need strength."
He moves his head to me, and we stare at each other. The rage in his eyes evaporated like it was never there. His expression is blank, and once more, I can't tell what he's thinking.
I grab the plate of food and set it on my lap, I pick up the sand which and tear it in half. "At least eat this much." I give him half and he takes it from me.
He eats. I know he doesn't like to be watched while he eats, so I stand up, and look around the room. Everything is exactly where I had left it, and it is strange to be back.
I start pulling one of the blankets off my bed and place it on the floor beside him. I was lucky enough to already have two pillows, so I gave him one. I can't sleep on the floor with him, because if my mother knocks on the door, I don't think I can explain to her why I'm sleeping on the floor. He watches me, but I ignore him, hoping he'd eat the other half of the sandwich. He doesn't.
When I move back to my bed, in the corner of my eye I see Cousin stand up and look around my room. He's examining everything from the pictures of me and Katie when we were younger hanging on my wall, to the stuffed animals on my desk, and the bookshelf I had stowed away in the corner. He pulls out a book, and then another, and another. I'm almost positive he can't read, but I let him do what he wants.
When he's bored of the books, he moves on to the stuffed animals. I had a teddy bear, a stuffed dog, and a stuffed tiger, all from my childhood that I now display due to the nostalgic memories they give me.
He stares at the tiger, and frowns. The circus had tigers; they were part of a few acts. He grabbed the tiger and examined it. Twisting the tiger around, he looked confused at what it was. "It's a toy." I explain to him, "Just something from my childhood."
"Yes." He explains, "I know toys." He lifts the tiger and places it back on the shelf. "I don't like them."
I frown, but he doesn't elaborate, and I don't ask.
When I was finished making our beds on the floor, I turn over and see him sitting on my bed. He's touching the mattress, and when he notices me staring at him, I say, "Would you like to sleep on the bed tonight?"
His eyes narrow as if I just asked him something so absurd, "No."
"Why won't you? It's comfortable, it'll help you sleep better."
"I do not know comfortable."
"You can." I tell him, sitting beside him on the mattress, "You can try it for one night."
"No."
"What if I offer you half a night?"
He looks at me, but I notice he's not saying no so I continue, "Half a night, and I'll have a bed on the floor waiting for you when you decide you don't want to sleep on a mattress anymore."
His head turns to the bed on the floor, and then back to me, then down to the mattress. He doesn't respond, so I do for him. "The bed it is."
I prepare the blankets on the mattress for him, and beckon him to get in. He stands and stares at the opening of the blankets, and then looks back at me. He doesn't move into the bed.
"Come on, just once please try it."
He takes a step back, and I know I've lost this time. I take a deep breath and dramatically sigh, "Fine. Sleep on the floor." I point to the blankets on the ground, "It's all yours."
He moves to the floor, and I climb into my bed. I turn off the lamp on my nightstand, and the room falls dark. It's been so long since I last slept in the bed, I fall asleep almost immediately. Everything is silent, and calm, but I don't dream of anything because I don't have the time to.
There is a dip in the mattress which wakes me up because I don't expect it. My eyes adjust to the dark, and I see Cousin climb onto the bed. He is carful to never come in contact with me, as he presses himself against the wall to be sure we don't touch. The breath catches in my throat when I realize not only is he trying to sleep in a bed, but he's trying to sleep in a bed that I'm also sleeping in, and he doesn't seem to care.
I gently pull the blanket over him, and he doesn'tpush it off. This is a giant leap of progress and I don't know what he'sthinking, but I will stay silent. I say nothing. He obviously says nothing. Togetherwe lay barely two feet apart, and I am ecstatic.