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Nellie woke with the feeling of intense heat surrounding her and a feeling of being weighed down. It didn't take long for her to realise that Ethan had joined her through the night and was now wrapped securely around her.
While she welcomed his closeness she was left with the burning question of Why? He made it clear last night that he didn't want to talk with her so was this a way of him calming his wolf? She had no idea.
The way he'd behaved last night scared her. She felt like that lost little girl all over again. She was just as affected as he was by what Sander said but had to wonder if her life had actually been worse. Ethan had the love of a beautiful woman and together they had a happy life. Regardless as to who she was or why she was willing to put herself in that situation Ethan had lived a happy life while she... she had Cam.
Feeling herself about to cry she started to move away from him only to be pulled back and swamped with arms that held her close to his body once more. Wrapped tightly around her in such a way that she couldn't move a muscle as a leg came across hers and held her closer still.
Was he still asleep? His breathing suggested otherwise but ths was the first time she'd woken with him and she wasn't sure.
"I'm sorry" he whispered as his head buried into her hair.
She stayed quiet.
"Love?"
"It's not enough." She pushed at his arms in an attempt to get him to release her. His hold became tighter the more she struggled. She fought both in anger and a hurting heart.
"Janella... stop!"
"Why?"
In less than three seconds he had her over on her back while he was straddling her and holding her arms above her head.
"What do you mean why?" his scowl did nothing to dampen the feelings she was feeling.
"What's the point?" she looked away from him.
"Look at me Janella Freemoon Holden! NOW!"
Her eyes snapped back at him and she could tell he was fighting badly with his wolf for control. His piercing gaze held her eyes locked to his.
"Now tell me.... what do you mean.... what's the point? What the hell is that?"
"Just that. You obviously aren't happy with anything Sander said last night so there's no point in us..." she trailed off as he became visibly enraged.
"There's no point in us?" he seethed "that's exactly the point. It's because of us that we met the people we did. Us is the reason why I had Holly as a mate. Us is the reason why you got Cameron. There is a point to us Janella! Don't you dare ever say there isn't!"
"Really Ethan? Then why wasn't I good enough to talk to last night? You weren't the only one in shock at what Sander told us!"
His expression softened "I'm sorry love, I shouldn't have excluded you. I didn't know how to handle everything.... Holly knowing she was going to die... Hannah being without a mother but still has one because her mother is a Goddess... it was a lot to take in..."
"What? And the things I found out about me weren't?"
"No love, that's not what I'm saying..."
"You know what Ethan, you can cry all you want but you will always know that Holly loved you. You'll know that when she was with you that you were happy... she gave you her daughter for heavens sake!" she drew a breath "What the hell did I get Ethan? I got pain and heartache. I got bullied until I wanted to die... and yes, I ran from there and i know I'd do it again because I STILL have scars from the abuse I suffered through. So while you're playing the pity game try and remember that the decisions made had you loved while I..."
He kissed her. She was lost in the tide of emotions that came with it. What started quickly to silence her rambling soon became so much more before it was over. Both out of breath as they stared at one another before Ethan spoke up.
"Do you have any idea how incredibly gorgeous you look when you're angry?" His forehead rested down on hers.
She groaned "ETHAN!!"
"Yes Nellie my love?" his grin was a mile wide.
"kissing me doesn't change anything about how I feel."
"I know that love but you're too hard to resist when" he traced a finger down the bridge of her nose "you get this little crease... right here... and it's extremely adorable."
"Ethan Junes... are you trying to take advantage of me?"
"Is it working?"
"No."
"Oh... then no.. I'm just telling you that you're cute, adorable and gorgeous. It should be a crime to be everything at once but I'l accept it... because you're mine."
Nellie shook her head at him "You're crazy."
"Yes, but I'm your crazy mate."
She sighed. "We still need to talk this through Ethan because..."
"Call me baby."
"Ethan" she whined "stop changing the subject."
Ethan moved off her to lie beside her with his head resting on his hand as he looked over her. "Love, what I did.. I was so wrong. You didn't deserve to be left out of anything. The way I behaved was extremely childish and I did what I promised I never would; I left you to deal with everything on your own." He kissed her forehead. "In some ways I wish they'd waited and we'd found each other when you were old enough but then I'd be wishing Hannah away and I'd never do that..."
"I'd never ask you to.."
"I know that love. You're far too beautiful in heart to ever cause pain for anyone. The only thing that I would change is your suffering. I have to be honest I'd love the chance to fight Cam one on one because I know I'd be the one walking away."+
"You won't do that right?" Her eyes searched his,
"Do you... do you still care for him at all? What you had wasn't just the werewolf bond, it was..."
"In the past. The bond was completely broken on the night of the full moon Ethan. He's gone from here" she placed a hand over her heart "and this crazy old guy replaced him."
"Hey! Enough of the old!"
"Oh... did you think I was talking about you?"
He mocked gasped and she laughed. Then his face became serious again.
"Does the age difference worry you at all?"
Nellie was completely floored that he... what?!
"I can honestly say that I've never even considered it! Does it worry you?"
"It did for a short time... a very short time."
"Wow.... really? Why?"
"Think about it. I'm the old guy with the seriously hot younger chick. A bit cliché don't you think?"
"Nowhere near it!"
"Really?"
"Wow Ethan... do you really have to ask? If I thought for one second that it was weird then you wouldn't be here."
"Oh yes I would! You won't get rid of me that easily young lady. Age difference or not... we belong together. You're mine." His eyes glazed over to black and Sanders deep voice came through with conviction "MINE". He bent his head towards her face and slowly kissed her again before moving back slightly "My Janella. Mine." His head moved quickly down to the place where his mark would go and she groaned as he kissed her gently. Moving he whispered in her ear "I want to mark you as mine. You already wear my wolf in your tattoo. It's time to complete the marking."
"But.. "
"I will be marking you Janella. Mating will take place when you feel that you"re ready. You are MINE and now the world will know that as well."
He moved back to the place he had kissed just moments ago and she felt the sharp scraping of his canines as they made their way across her skin. She was unsure as to what to expect as she felt them piercing her skin. One second of stinging that paved the way for an excruciating pain that was reminiscent of giving birth and had her crying out until there was no further pain and he lifted his head. He licked the area clean and watched as the mark started to heal and could see the growth of her tattoo as it wove its way up her chest and down her arm stopping just before her elbow. He smiled and looked back to her face to see her eyelids drooping badly.
"Sleep little one, we shall talk again after you sleep."