With each word, "first"'s social control system tries to limit her. It produces a slight jerk often with an audible sound like [ghick].
[ghick] I
[ghick] loath
[ghook] you
[ghok] with
[ghuck] the
[ghick] intensity
[ghick] of ten
[ghick] thousand
[ghock] suns.
[ghick] You
[ghick] have no
[gmick] idea
[ghick] what
[ghick] a
[ghuck] giving and
[ghick] pure
[ghick] person
[ghick] you
[ghick] have
[ghouck] hurt.
[gmick] She
[ghick] overcomes
[ghick] her
[ghick] limits
[ghick] every day,
[ghick] only
[ghick] to focus
[ghick] on
[gick] helping those
[ghick] in
[ghick] need.
[ghick] You
[ghick] have
[ghick] no idea
[ghick] of the
[ghick] intense
[guck] struggle
[ghick] and
[ghick] fortitude.
[ghick] For
[ghick] you
[ghick] to
[ghick] carelessly
[ghouck] use
[ghick] those
[gmick] trigger words.
[ghick] On a
[ghick] person
[ghick] devoted to
[ghick] trying
[ghick] make
[gick] you
[ghick] whole,
[gouk] healthy,
[gick] happy.
[ghick] I
[ghick] have
[ghick] known
[ghick] from the
[ghick] first day.
[gmick] I
[ghick] could
[ghick] feel
[guk] her
[ghick] heart beats
[ghick] in
[gmick] my
[ghick] hands.
[gick] She
[ghick] felt
[ghick] that
[ghick] giving up
[ghick] the
[ghick] plane body
[ghick] of Ima
[ghick] might
[ghick] hurt
[ghick] her
[gouck] chances
[ghick] to join
[ghick] the Lan.
[ghick] She
[ghick] did
[ghick] not
[ghick] wait
[ghick] even
[ghick] a micro-second.
[ghick] She
[ghick] would
[ghick] not
[ghick] ever
[ghick] let
[ghick] another
[gouk] suffer,
[ghick] never
[ghick] if it
[ghick] cost
[guuk] her
[ghick] dearly.
[ghick] I
[ghick] want
[ghick] you
[ghick] to
[ghick] spend
[ghick] just a little
[ghick] time
[ghick] looking
[ghick] at
[ghick] me
[ghick] after I
[ghick] finish talking,
[ghick] to
[ghick] see
[ghick] me
[ghick] in
[ghick] calm.
[ghick] Finally,
[ghick] if you
[ghick] are
[ghick] having
[ghick] any trouble
[ghick] understanding
[ghick] what
[ghick] I
[ghick] have said,
[ghick] I
[ghick] will
[ghick] send
[ghick] you
[gmick] a digital copy.
The Digital Copy
"I loath you with the intensity of ten thousand suns. You have no idea what a giving and pure person you have hurt. She overcomes her limits every day, only to focus on helping those in need. You have no idea of the intense struggle and fortitude. For you to carelessly use those trigger words. On a person devoted to trying make you whole, healthy, happy. I have known from the first day. I could feel her heart beats in my hands. She felt that giving up the plane body of Ima might hurt her chances to join the Lan. She did not wait even a micro-second. She would never let another suffer, not even if it cost her dearly. I want you to spend just a little time looking at me after I finish talking, to see me in calm. Finally, if you are having any trouble understanding what I have said, I will send you a digital copy."