The next day, as planned, you got ready to spend the day with your mom. For some reason, you were nervous. It's been almost a year since you've seen your mother and you were afraid you'd have to continue to lie to her about what's been happening ever since she was gone. Growing up, you and your her had this thing to always be honest with one another, but that's been hard to do ever since you met Mark. You're probably not even going to tell her about what happened between you and your father.
You were in your room, trying your best to brush your hair into a decent ponytail. As you tie the scrunchie, there's a familiar knock on the door. Already knowing who it was, you don't say anything since they usually just let themselves in any way.
"Why are you up so early?" Mark questions, wearily, scratching the back of his head as he plops down on your bed.
"It's noon."
"Oh? Then I'm going back to bed." He belly flops on to your bed, grabbing one of your pillows to cuddle with. One of his arms raises, signaling you to join him in the comfort of your bed. You decline his offer by shaking your head while you continue to neaten your appearance. Mark looks you up and down, scrutinizing you, basically checking you out. You feel his gaze bore into the back of your head, but you just decide to ignore it.
Your surprised when a pair of arms wrap around you suddenly which causes you to turn around briefly. When he tugs at the hem of your dress, you stare at him, brows knitted, and confusion was written across your face. "What?"
"If you're wearing something that short, I assume it's for me." He utters lowly, still tugging. "Maybe you should change."
It was a casual dress. About an inch or two above your knees. It was a gift from your mom and you thought since you were going to be spending the rest of the day with her, you might as well put it to good use. "Why should I?" You frown, jerking down the hem of it to keep it from rising.
He shakes his head, never mind. "Where you going anyway?"
"Out." You state. "Behave while I'm gone."
Mark huffs, plopping himself down on his bed. "Can't you stay and play with me?" When you deny his childish offer and stroke his hair, he pulls you closer towards him as he pouts.
"Your mom is still here. Talk to her."
He groans, head falling back, somewhat displeased with your suggestion. His fingers glide up and down the back of your thighs inattentively which sent a minor chill up your back. You only sigh at how puerile and amorous he was at the moment. "Please?"
You cup his face in your hands, giving his cheeks light pats as you lean in. "Rules are rules. Control your hormones."
At that, he huffs then pouts, pulling away from you to lean back against his elbows. He accepts that you need your freedom and time with your mother since he can't be selfish and keep you for twenty-four hours a day even though he wants to so bad. "If I get blue balls, it's your fault."
You just ignore him, continuing to get ready to leave.
💐💐💐💐💐
You don't know whence the last time you've ever been so edgy. You've wiped the palm of your clammy hands at the ends of your dress when your mother began to ask a few questions about how you've been and how was school. You responded with simple answers, avoiding her gaze by looking at your surroundings or stir around the ice cubes in your glass with the straw.
At the moment, you were at a restaurant seated in the outdoor area. You glance over at the cars that were passing by then you look back over at her before sighing. "I'm sorry... but this is..."
"Awkward? Yeah," She breathes out a laugh, the utensils in her hand clinking against her plate when she set them down. "It's going to take some time to catch up on things."
You agree, taking a few sips from your drink as your mother does the same. She clears her throat which causes your attention to shoot to her from your glass. By the look on her, you could tell she had something on her mind, yet she seemed kind of perturbed. You don't question it, instead, just sit there staring out into space chewing the tip of your straw as you watch random cars pass by.
"I heard some news about your father."
Your heart drops at her words. The first thing you could think about was that somehow she found about what happened between you and your father and that you were in trouble because you saw him without her consent and didn't even tell her that you met him. You don't say anything, sticking your straw in your mouth to chew on in hopes to calm how anxious you were.
She exhales, picking at the food on her plate with her fork as she looks up at you instantly making eye contact which made you even more nervous. "I heard he's on trial." She adds on and you felt relieved that it wasn't about you.
"On trial?" You restate confused. "Like, he's going to jail or prison?"
"If he's found guilty."
"For what?"
"Sexual assault, abuse. Something like that." She sighs, taking a sip from her glass. "Now, you see why I had to get away from him. He was so... toxic. I didn't want my baby growing up around that."
Based on what she said, he'd probably definitely be found guilty. Just the thought of the time he tried to make a move on you made you feel sick and sent a shiver down your spine. It was sickening, his daughter, and the fact he probably did it to other people. If you could, you would testify, but that would put too much pressure on you. It's not something you could easily forget, but you try what you can.
You were frowning and staring blankly at the table, sipping unconsciously from your straw. Your mom tries to search for your eyes but failed so instead tapped the table to bring back from your thoughts. "What's up?"
"Nothing." You force a smile.
"So, did you enjoy your time there?" She asks, trying to start up another conversation.
Humming, you shrug. "At first it was.. interesting. But it's okay now."
"And you and Mark get along well?" She adds on. You squint your eyes, shrugging as you tilt your hand back and forth as a so-so. She accepts your answer, her hair swaying in front of her face when she rests her cheek against her palm. You don't say anything to add on and continue to pick at the food on the plate in front of you. "You know, I'm actually taking a little break from working overseas."
"So, you're staying longer than a week?"
"Yeah, I'll just continue to work at the office." She chimes, hoping to light up the rigid atmosphere that lingered around you. You just nod, knowing that you were going to have to move back home which you figured would happen sometime this year. Your mother slumps back in her seat, blowing out a puff that causes her hair to land in a different position across her face. "But there's something else..."
The quick look you give her has her shifting somewhat restless in her seat. She subconsciously scans the people around her then focuses her attention on you. Your brow arch, confusion, and curiosity are written across your face that she easily reads.
"Uh, we're moving and I'm not talking going back home."
You stare blankly at her before chuckling, just laughing it off in hopes she was joking even though you had a feeling that it wasn't. When you see she's not joking, you stop laughing, clear your throat, and huff out disappointingly as you cross your arms over your chest. "Why?"
"I got transferred and it's near your aunt, so we'll be staying with her."
"That's like hours away." You declare. "What about my friends? College? I haven't even got an acceptance letter yet."
She explains herself, saying how it would be nice to make up for the time she's lost. You would argue that now since you're older and you graduated that you can be independent and live on your own, but you know that she'll probably imply the fact that you don't have a job and wouldn't even know where to start. So, you just keep your thoughts to yourself, knowing that you're going to give in and pity her for wanting to be close again.
"Can you reconsider?" A sigh of bitterness leaving you in hopes you can at least try to change her mind once more. "Like, what about m-" You stop yourself from saying anything, just letting yourself slump back into your seat to let off some steam. Persuading was doing nothing.
"What?"
Shaking your head, you mumble an audible "Nothing," under your breath. Her brows cock at that. Next thing, she's digging through her, placing something down on the napkins in front of you.
It was the pregnancy test you took yesterday. She must have taken it from the trash. Staring at it then back at her, you swallow, heart pounding in your chest. She has that look on her face. That look when you know you did something wrong or she knows your hiding something.
"Do you want to explain yourself?" Her arms cross over chest, brows more arched than before.
You shrug, trying to act oblivious. "It's not mine."
There was no point in pretending since she found it in the bathroom when she arrived. She knew about Mark. How he slept around, so she had to assume it was either yours or some other girl. You knew you were going to have to tell her sooner or later and it looks like sooner.
"You're sleeping with him, aren't you?"
You shrug again. "So? He's my boyfriend."
"Miss Lee told me about him."
"It's different now."
She becomes silent for a moment, fiddling with her nails, elbows propped up on the table as she just gazes at you. You don't add any other remark, reluctant to the fact that she'll just include more of her opinions to try and make a point. Though what surprises you is how calm she looks when she sighs and leans back in her chair casually as she crosses a leg over the other, an "Oh, well," leaving her lips.
"That's it?" Your query and she nods. "You're not gonna argue that he's wrong for me or whatnot?"
"No, I trust you." She comes out with. "I don't care who you date as long as your happy."
You would question why she seemed upset earlier, but she probably just say that she was testing you or something like that. She could be a real pain sometimes, but she's your mother, you learn to deal with her. You're glad she's understanding and probably covertly happy about the fact that you're dating her best friend's son which makes question how Miss Lee would react.
💐💐💐💐💐
You were dropped back off at the house. Your mom hasn't taken off yet, you could still hear the roar of the car engine outside. She was waiting for miss Lee who is on the couch, digging through her purse frantically. You announce your arrival by closing the door and clearing your throat.
She spares a look at you and bids you welcome. "Sweetie, have you seen my keys?"
You randomly guess and just point towards the kitchen which she quickly gets up to check. "Going somewhere?" You ask her when she returns to the living room.
"I'm meeting your mom and some friends," She smiles, patting your head. "Dinner's on the stove if you kids are hungry."
"What time will you be back?"
"Depends how much we drink." She chuckles. "I'm taking care of some stuff then I'll be gone."
"Make good choices."
"No promises." She snickers. "And do me a favor? Bring these to my lazy son."
She hands you a small basket full of folded laundry which you obediently take, letting out an "oof" when it was heavier than you expected. Miss Lee shows her gratitude by giving you a quick smile and a somewhat affectionate tap on the arm.
You sigh, feeling tense as you head up the stairs to Mark's room, not knowing how he would take the news. It's either now or never.
I'm alive, I promise