Belle Fawn
"I'm smart, I'm strong, I can do this."
I ran the straightener through my brunette hair watching as the waves became pinpoint. The blue in my eyes' reflection stared back at me while I tried to calm how nervous I feel. Is my red lipstick too bold? Once I finished my last strand, I stood back to examine my outfit. It was a black pencil skirt paired with a burgundy blouse button-up that was tucked into my skirt.
"Belle, come on you'll be late."
I've been sharing an apartment with my best friend Gracie since college. When we lived in California we shared an apartment too since the dorms were packed. Not much has changed but the setting, we're back in our hometown New York until we go back for college. I've been homeschooled and graduated at seventeen. My parents were my teachers until they hired profesionals as I got older.
Gracie was never homeschooled, so she joined me later on at college which is why this would be my last year and not hers.
"I'm coming." I unplugged the straightener.
College hadn't been a walk in the park for me since I didn't quite get through my socializing stage. I didn't go to any parties or social events just my classes then I went home to Gracie and I's shared apartment. The same with homeschooling I was never allowed friends since they'd distract me. My time was mostly set on my studies as I wanted to get my degree to start working anyway. My parents, wanted that the most of all I'm lucky enough to have Gracie.
Now I'm almost twenty-two, I have an internship set up by my father of course. Today is my first day and I'd been dreading it all week. It was an assistant job to the boss of Grant Incorporate, just for the summer break. My father spoke with the boss ahead of time for this position since they were friends and worked together in the past. My mother also says she just knows it'll look good on resumes.
I dashed around to grab my purse and phone before heading downstairs, "Wow, whoever your boss is is going to drop dead of a heart attack. Look at you!" Gracie beamed with her mouth agape.
A laugh escaped me while she joined me, and we soon headed outside to her car.
"Nervous?" she asked, we buckled up.
I nodded eagerly and she smiled, "Don't be you are crazy smart B."
With that being said we drove off and not slow enough we made it to the big building made of black pane. It read 'Grant Incorporate.' with big white letters at the top. They were known for giving huge loans to charities in need as well as communities, hospitals, and people etc. They also developed many small businesses within their franchise to help employ people. I got out of the car and shut the door behind me with shaky hands.
"Alright, knock em dead, kiddo." Gracie shouted through the window at me.
I rolled my eyes at the remark, "Thank you." I smiled.
Here goes everything I walked up to see people leaving and entering as the time passed. The glass door had been opened for me when someone left, I was able to see more men and women buzzing like worker bees in business attire. In my head I thought at least I dressed appropriately. A desk caught my eye which I assumed to be the receptionist area where I headed straight toward. A woman was on the other side with a computer ready to abide by any of my concerns.
"Hello, my name is Mads. How may I help you?" her aura screamed politeness which calmed my nerves at first.
My words got caught in my throat when I struggled to find words. I didn't necessarily talk to people in my life besides Gracie. I had close to zero socializing skills except for her, who had been the one to talk to me first. So it wasn't out of the ordinary that I always found it incredibly hard to speak to someone. In my head if you weren't someone I regularly spoke to it was a mission to speak to you.
After counting to three, I finally spoke, "Hi, I'm Belle Fawn. I'm here for my first day as-"
"Wait, your belle?" she asked, her facade flew through the window with my confidence.
My voice came out timid but still somewhat strong, "Yes I am." I might not be good with my words, but that didn't mean I'd let people speak to me in a way.
Mads gave me a once over, pressing a button on her earpiece, "Mr. Black, Belle Fawn is here for her first day." The line was silent for a moment before muffling could be heard.
She smiled but even I knew it wasn't real. What did I do anyway? By the looks of it, socializing wasn't going to be easy, especially since I've missed out on it for so long. Which meant I'd probably be going through these types of interactions more than once today, maybe even months.
"It's the top floor the door all the way down the hall, and the elevator is over there." she flicked her manicured finger to the right, directing me.
Yikes.
I walked towards the elevators with ease, trying to mentally wash away her negative energy she attached to me. Suddenly the doors stopped roughly when a foot jammed into the opening. My eyes traveled up to meet a very shocked face which matched my own. He quickly smiled and the doors opened, allowing him to enter.
"Terribly sorry about that ma'am." his voice is soft, and I tried to find my voice yet again.
I counted in my head, "That's alright." I tightly smiled, his black suit making the brown in his eyes stand out.
"I haven't seen you around before, are you new?" he pressed the button with a big eight on it.
"Yes, actually."
"Really, what's your field?" Our eyes met, giving us both the chance to properly face one another.
"Actually, I don't work here as a job. It's just an internship for the summer." I explained to him.
Right when the elevator dinged for his stop, he replied, "Well, I hope I get to see you around more often then." he flashed me a wink as he got off and the elevator closed behind him.
Gracie would drop dead right now, honestly. Any time a guy flirted with me or anything remotely close to that in college, she would get excited thinking it'd lead somewhere. It never did obviously because I'd never let it. Other than walking me to class and sitting next to me during said class, things never made it to the next level. To put it more lightly things never made it outside of school.
I was satisfied with that since I had to focus on my studies, not men for my parents.
Which is why Gracie had such a huge grudge against them in the first place. She said they, and I quote were 'Cock blocking me.' Once my stop came, I got off noticing how quiet it had been and how spacious the room is. I followed directions and walked down the end of the hall before knocking.
"Come in." The voice sent shivers down my spin as I twisted the golden knob.
The first thing I see is a desk and a man sitting at the chair with his head hung low as he read over some papers I presumed. His hair is jet black and he looked around maybe my age, but slightly older. He remained looking down when I came in and shut the door behind me softly with a click.
"So I've heard from your father you graduated early and jumped straight into college, that's.." his voice trailed off, my heels clicking against the marble floor, which effortlessly caught his attention.
We made eye contact, and I finally got to see his face. He is just as handsome as the man in the elevator. Maybe even better than him, do all the attractive people work here? If so, I think Gracie would want an actual job here as well.
His eyes were a beautiful hazel color with bright golden flecks in them. The complexion of his tan skin seemed so smooth, like he never had a blemish in his life. His perfectly kept stubble against his square jaw told me he kept good care of himself.
My eyes fell to his lips when they stretched into a smirk, "Miss Fawn?" his voice spoke throughout the room, "Did you hear what I just said?" he stood up, catching my eyes, and man is he tall.
"No, I'm sorry." I replied, watching him gracefully make his way to the front of his desk to lean against.
I inwardly beat myself up at the thought of screwing this up by not paying attention. There were two black chairs seated in the front of his desk, but my palms were sweating from his smirk plastered on his face. He had one of his hands in his black slacks and the other on the desk.
"I said I find that you graduated early and went straight to college at such a young age impressive, you can sit." Hearing that, it made my cheeks heat up as I made my way to one of the two chairs.
"Thank you."
He nodded in acknowledgment, "Today I'm just going to be showing you where you'll be working and showing you around so you can get to know the building." he turned to his left, picking up some papers and a pamphlet of some sort.
It was handed over to me so I could scan it over, "It's a map of the building and some papers of what my schedule will look like." he spoke up again, drawing my eyes to his but once they caught mine I drew them back to the map.
His eyes were very intimidating, he feels like a serious man. I didn't want to mess this up and have it possibly get back to my father either. I nodded my head in answer to his question, giving my attention to the papers to avoid his gaze.
"Belle." his voice is deep, almost hoarse when he said my name, "I'm going to need verbal responses from you, understand?" I met his eyes again, and my teeth again caught my bottom lip in a nervous habit.
"I'm sorry, yes." His eyes narrowed on me.
Our staring match seemed to go on forever, which made my face get warmer. His gaze melted away when he headed straight for the door the next second. Not letting me have an ounce of time to reflect on how strict he is.
"Come with me, I'll show you where you'll be working."
I followed him out the door and down the same hall I came from. Using a key, he unlocked a door that wasn't very far from his own office. The door opened and he stepped aside, allowing me to enter first. When I did, I saw a single desk with a chair tucked in and a couple of paintings hung up. Across from my desk up against the wall was a blue lounge couch with a coffee station built beside it.
"You can set your things down and will go." I followed what he said, placing my purse down on the desk and the papers he gave me.
When we finally headed out I only now noticed their was only one other room up here. Which is a restroom, that's when I realized he had the floor all to himself. That alone told me how serious and important he is. Once we were inside the elevator, he pressed number eight where Nathan had gone.
"Floor nine is just for the maintenance people. Eight is the field of people who produce advertisements for the business." he further explained.
The doors opened up to the floor, and he stepped off, pushing me to fall into step with his tall frame. As we walked I could see people would greet him then smile politely at me. I didn't feel so nervous anymore and I took in everything he said.
"In here, you'll find digital designers for advertisements or journalists writing articles for us."
Just when he finished his sentence, I saw the same man from the elevator. He came our way holding a coffee in one hand and papers in the other.
"Liam!" he called, putting his hand out to shake with Mr. Black.
"Nathan."
He grasped his hand for a firm shake before letting it go, "This is Belle Fawn.." Mr. Black started to introduce me when Nathan spoke up.
"Elevator girl." he joked in a humorous tone with a laugh, I smiled shyly not being so used to the formal interaction.
"Have you guys met already?" Mr. Black asked with a questioning stare, his eyes wondering between the two of us, mainly me.
"Should you tell him or should I?"
Nathan prolonged the joke as if it was such a big secret, and it made me smile more at how open he seemed. It made me feel more open myself since I allowed myself to share a laugh with him.
I then shook my head, facing Mr. Black, "We just met in the elevator ride on my way up here."
"Uh, huh." his stare made my face heat up, he brought it back to Nathan, "Right, so I was just showing her around will be going now." his tone was stoic.
When I started to follow after him, Nathan lightly caught my wrist in his hand to stop me, "Good luck, it was nice to get that name." he finished with a grin that made me smile.
"Yours too." I responded.
"Miss Fawn."
I looked back hearing my name and I noticed Mr. Black already sealed away in the elevator eying me apprehensively. I rushed a quick goodbye from my lips and parted from Nathan who uttered a good luck my way. Liam didn't seem too impressed with the interaction, he almost seemed annoyed. He didn't say anything other than pressing the button for floor seven. The scent of his cologne invading my senses as he did so.
Questions circled my mind, I wondered whether this whole first day is going as good as I hoped it to be. Or if I'm completely blowing it by overthinking everything. The rest of the day was spent showing me around the building and introducing me to some people. During the seconds not spent surrounded by people there was no conversation between us, it felt tense but I couldn't pinpoint why. I wondered if being my fathers daughter had anything to do with it or if he just wasn't a people person.
When the elevator opened on our floor we both walked out, "Usually around this time I'd have you go get lunch for me since I work through my lunches, then you can have the remaining hour or so for yours but, I'm not feeling very hungry."
I nodded in acknowledgement about to enter my office when he suddenly gripped my wrist, not enough to hurt me though. It shocked me a bit just like Nathan did and he had grabbed my whole hand. Liam's intention with it feels different as he's been closed off all day compared to Nathan's carefree energy he tied to his touch.
"Belle," My teeth dug into my bottom lip as the nerves took me over, "Verbal responses remember?"
The way his eyes saw through me made his words all the more alluring and it did something not many men have achieved, it gave me butterflies.
I replied meekly, "Yes, I'm sorry." My throat became dry.
He slowly pulled his lips into a smirk letting my hand slip from his grip. I watched him turn around and head for his office doors as I quickly dashed for mine. In a funny way I felt lightheaded, I shut my door behind me and chose the couch to sit at. I mentally made a note to answer him more instead of humming. Not really having an appetite I decided to text Gracie only to see there was a message awaiting me already.
How's it going? Is your boss drooling for you yet?
Warmth spread through my cheeks at seeing her text and even though no one else is in the room, I turned my phone off just for a split second.
Please stop! But to answer your first question it's going iffy, Liam seems like a stern guy very closed off. I've also met this other guy who works here his name is Nathan who seems way more nice.
Fine but of course he is, Nathan guy for the win! Where's my innocent Fawn though two guys one day?? what have you done with her????
A giggle escaped my lips when I read her reply, I knew she'd have something to say about the mention of my interactions. She knows how I am so her jokes never landed in the wrong spot with me. Her last message came in after the previous quite quickly.
Also don't think I didn't see that your on first name basis with the boss already...
I heard a light knock at my door, I put a thumbs down to her message before standing, "Come in."
The door opened and Nathan lifted his hand up to greet me with a smile, "Hey." he looked around the room, "Nice office, better than mine."
"Really?"
He nodded reaching to fiddle with a plant near the door, "Way better than my cubicle." he laughed aloud.
I bit back a smile, "We could swap if you want."
He made his way closer to the couch to sit all while shaking his head in distaste, "And room with the boss? No thank you." I rolled my eyes playfully at the humor in his tone and he went on, "I'm actually wondering if you'd want to get lunch with me?" he scratched the back of his neck almost nervously, not meeting my gaze now.
Is he nervous? In my opinion I should be the one that's nervous, my mouth ran dry and my palms were becoming sweaty. I wasn't sure of what to say, I never went on a date let alone something as small as having lunch. After mindlessly overthinking over nothing I decided that having lunch wouldn't be so bad and making a friend here could help me in the long run.
"Sure."
The walk over to the quaint cafe didn't take long he said this is where he comes on his breaks most of the time. He got us a table and we ordered our drinks where we started up another conversation. Who knew there were other people that talked as much as Gracie did, I never minded as I've always been more of a listener. We shared some laughs when he told stories from his college days at Stanford, which gave us a whole topic to stem from. I also learned that he's twenty five, he's been working for Grant Incorporate for over two years now and he has a dog.
"Well I want to meet him." I claimed tossing my finished drink in the trash.
He just finished telling me about his six month old poodle he recently got from the pound. I even got to see some pictures of him and I seriously need to see this puppy!
"Of course." he chuckled reaching for the buildings doors for me.
"Good, I love animals."
For my first lunch ever, I'm starting to think I'm not so bad at getting myself out there. We made our way to the elevator and I caught sight of the receptionist from this morning. She caught my eye before turning to handle some people heading her way. I just caught the sound of the elevator ringing through my ears when I heard Nathan speak.
"Ah, don't tell me you're going to use me for my poodle now." his tone is humorous as we walked onto the elevator.
"Of course not." I laughed.
We reached my floor first and I looked to see Liam's door wide open with him standing in the doorway. He definitely silenced any words we were sharing, catching all of my attention. His eyes seemed tired and his hair looked like he was running his fingers through it in a stressful manner. The black tie he had on earlier was now hanging loosely from his neck.
"It was nice having lunch with you, I hope we can do it again."
I faced Nathan again to see him with a smile plastered on his lips. For a moment I froze at the second invitation but slowly felt myself liking the idea.
"Yeah that sounds good."
I decided this friendship may as well start somewhere and I tried to comprehend how he saw our ordeal.
"Alright, well bye Belle." he muttered.
"Bye Nathan."
I walked from the elevator and he smiled as it closed, a part of me could feel the tension that occupied the room when he left. Liam stared at me with the so obvious 'come here' eyes, I don't know how many times my parents used that with me before I recognized it on cue. His energy emitted a very calming at the same time dominating arura. So in the silence I walked up to him with my breathing rapidly picking up as I reached him where he stood in the entry of his door.
"I'm sorry if I'm late."
He rubbed his chin lazily and clicked his tongue, "No actually you're right on time." he opened his door wider and motioned for me to go inside.
Once I did all he had me do is organize some forms from various companies that didn't seem too hard once he showed me. I had been determined to ask as little questions as possible unless really needed. I want him and my parents especially to know I'm fully capable of this work. Here and there my curiosity would get the better of me and I'd steal a couple glances at Liam. I found him attractive and it was on me when he'd catch me staring, my heart raced and I forced myself to stop.
"Did you finish with the C3?" his voice stuck fear in me as we hadn't talked for the last hour and a half.
I quickly knew he'd been speaking of the files I just finished neatly putting away, "Yes."
"Can I see it real quick?" he questioned, he offered his hand out never looking up from his screen.
Without a response I walked over with the folder, placing it in his open palm, "Here you go."
He tore his gaze away to make eye contact now, "Thank you Miss Fawn, if you're finished I think you should be good to go home, you did good today." he drifted his eyes back to the screen.
"Thank you, Mr. Black." I smiled a little to myself at the achievement before turning away.
"You can call me Liam."
He stated and I glanced back to see him staring at the file I just gave him. A grin slipped onto my face once my back is to him. I exited his office rushing back to mine and feeling relief wash over me at the day being over. My phone is the first thing I grabbed out of my purse to call Gracie.
"Hi B."
"Gracie, I'm all done for the day."
I could hear a gasp and a curse slip past her lips, "Shit, I totally forgot and picked up a shift. We are in a serious rush, and if I leave-"
"I understand, Gracie."
I could hear the chaos of chatter behind her now and how stressed she seemed, "I'm so sorry, I'll make it up to you B."
"I know, love you and don't work too hard."
"Love you B, I'll see you at home." she said softly.
The call ended as I bit my lip in thought.
I placed the papers he gave me inside my desk and grabbed my purse to start making my way out of the office. My thoughts raced wildly in my head while I walked over to the elevators. All things pertaining to how I'll get home, should I get a cab, ride a bus or call my dad? I didn't want to be seen as a kid anymore so before I could talk myself out of it, I went to find Nathan. I felt like I needed to listen to Gracie's instructions, she shot me a text after suggesting I ask Nathan for a ride.
Cabs were rather pricey anyways, I clicked the button for the eighth floor and just when the silver doors opened I caught sight of him walking my way. It isn't just him though it's Liam too, I heard him leave minutes before me but I didn't know he was here. Both of them looked my way when the obnoxious arrival sound alerted them of my presence.
Suddenly having both their eyes on me, I feel nervous. I tried to only make eye contact with Nathan and avoided Liam's eyes all together. Nathan already wore a smile instantly striking up a humorous bit.
"Belle, it seems the elevator is rooting for us."
I honestly didn't expect that to be the joke as I felt my heart pick up at the innuendo of his statement. Not only did he say it but, Liam is a witness to it which drew some shyness to me.
"Yeah I guess." I mumbled.
I stepped aside when they entered the tiny box that felt smaller now that I wasn't alone, "The button, Nathan." Liam stated.
He pushed for the first floor and the feeling of being pulled down could be felt in silence. The ten seconds or more it probably took to get us there felt like forever. When we finally reached the floor, the doors opened and we stepped out.
I didn't want to waste any time before I turned to Nathan, "I wanted to ask you if it isn't too big of a favor for a ride home? My roommate told me she couldn't last minute." I explained.
"Yeah I'd love to." Nathan smiled with a curt nod.
When I opened my mouth to say something I noticed Liam from my peripherals walking up to us in a haste, "I couldn't help but over hear Miss Fawn that you need a ride home?"
"I- yeah but-"
"I could take you it's on my way," he glanced to Nathan with a raised eyebrow, "You live across town don't you?"
Being in the middle of them I could certainly see how much they differed in features. Almost like they were the exact opposites to one another. Liam is also a bit taller than Nathan and I lingered on how their eyes spoke more words than their actual mouths. I don't think I've ever in my college days seen such attractive men and that says a lot coming from someone who's been called a prude more times than she can count.
The smile on Nathan's face seemed to falter when he took in Liam's words, "Yeah I do but, really it's no problem." Yet again that soft smile slipped onto his lips when he flickered his eyes to me.
I smiled in appreciation feeling a bit awkward at the fact that I'm the center of the topic. A part of me also felt confused and surprised that Liam would want to take me home after being so to himself for the day. I know he said it was on the way and he is my fathers friend, so I started to lean towards him, taking me.
"I just thought it would save more time for you, don't you think Miss. Fawn?" Liam suddenly asked, tilting his head towards me his eyes locked with mine heatedly.
I could feel the blood rush to my face from suddenly being put on the spot. He raised an eyebrow as I remained silent. I didn't want to make it seem like I'm choosing Liam over him however it did make the most sense to ride with him if Nathan lived across town. I wouldn't want to be an inconvenience to him.
I forced out a meek, "Yes," My eyes apologetically drifted to Nathan, "I'm sorry, if you live across town I don't want to be a bother to you."
Nathan seemed defeated by the ordeal but, he nonetheless agreed, "As long as you get home safe, I'll see you tomorrow?"
A genuine smile formed on my face, "Tomorrow."
We all then separated going our different ways as I silently followed Liam to the parking lot. He walked fast, that or he'd been eager to get rid of me. When we made it to his car he surprised me again by opening my door for me. I know I shouldn't have but it was natural, I could feel a blush staining my cheeks. I've only ever seen a gesture like this in movies and so it struck a heartstring for me.
On the road I knew it would be silent so it shocked me when he spoke up over the low tunes of the radio, "Why didn't you ask me to drive you home?"
If I had to genuinely answer I don't think there was one reason why I didn't ask him, I just didn't consider him as an option. Gracie had also gave me directions and I followed them. I know that if I went with that reasoning it would make me seem childish but, only having her as a support mechanism for almost three years will do that to you. She had been there for me more times emotionally and mentally within the past few years than my parents ever have in my whole life.
"I don't know." I whispered.
"Are you sure?" he stopped at a red light and turned to face me, his eyes studying my face with curiosity.
"Yes." I answered.
After the green light came on he started to drive again only humming as a response, "You live in the apartments on kern right?"
"How do you know that?"
He pushed air through his nose, a small smirk rising on his lips, "Your dad told me a lot about you, Fawn."
I could feel the knot of embarrassment in my throat my dad boasting me up to my boss, his friend, ugh. Nothing else was said my question being enough confirmation that's where I lived. My eyes unwillingly drifted to him, he leaned his elbow on the arm rest touching his chin while he drove with one hand.
I found Liam to be really really handsome his hands were covered in rings, each with their own intricate designs. He had more on his right hand then he did his left one though. A black one sat on his pointer finger with a silver indent of a spider in the middle. He also had a gold one on his other hand along with two more obsidian ones. I couldn't quite see all of them from where I was but I already knew they were just as cool looking.
I decided to shift my gaze to his jawline that was squarely defined with a light stubble on it, it wasn't bad it was attractive really. I've never been attracted to a guy so fast or been interested in one really but every time I look at him I can't tear my eyes away. I almost felt the same way about Nathan's features only I found I could look away. Did that mean I found Liam more attractive in some odd way? Before he could catch him staring and I completely embarrass myself, I looked away.
Apparently I hadn't been so slick as I caught sound of his light chuckle and it sent those childish butterflies straight to my gut. It was a deep and rich laugh but short lived like he didn't mean to let it out. After a couple more minutes in silence we finally made it and I faced him again.
"Thank you, I really appreciate it." his gaze held mine as he shook his head nonchalantly.
"It's no problem."
I nodded my head as a response and got ready to get out when his hand landed on my wrist to stop me. My breath hitched in my throat at the sudden contact.
"Next time..." he stared into my eyes, "I want you to ask me if you need a ride." his voice is firm and my eyes met his at the authority it held.
I softly slipped my hand from his grip, feeling my cheeks heat up, "Okay."
Our eyes fought in this silent war that I felt I couldn't escape from as I uttered a goodnight. When I opened the door he seemed to clear his throat before mumbling a goodbye to me. I shut the car door and walked up the stairs to my apartment using my key to open the door. Once it opened I glanced back in curiosity to see him still parked there. Once we made eye contact he drove away and as soon as I knew for sure he was gone I shut my door with relief.
My heart had still been pounding from the intensity I felt in the car. I headed for my room to take a shower when my phone began to ring inside my purse. When I pulled it out the screen flashed with 'mom' which made me audibly sigh. I pressed the green circle hesitantly to answer the phone and put on a positive attitude.
"Hello?"
"Belle, I just wanted to know how your first day was?" she questioned me in a surprisingly concerning tone.
"It was good mom." I quipped, anticipating what else my mother might want to say.
My mother and I have never been the closest it's always just been her wanting me to do my absolute best, literally. Ace every test, join every honors class and make sure my record stays clean. There were no sleepovers, baking with mom, or braiding each others hair. Same with my father who I assume urged my mother to call me.
My suspicions were confirmed when she replied, "Well that's great, your father will be pleased to hear that as am I." I open my mouth to reply but she cuts me off, "Okay Belle you get some rest for work tomorrow goodbye."
Just like that the call ends and I'm left with my feelings hurt yet again, "I love you too mom." I whispered to myself, the words hanging loosely in the air not ever being heard.
Not once did she ask how I am or how I've been feeling about this new transition. It never came to my emotions, my parents almost never asked about my mental health. They never questioned me when I was young either. Now that I'm older I think I tend to need it a little more being on my own now. Not one of them even asked if I wanted to do this internship.
Yet I indulged it because, I want them to be proud of me.
I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter of Love & Lust! ✅️
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