hi again i said i wasn't gonna
update but i couldn't help it🥰
♡♡♡
Jeongguk scored twenty points on his own.
His teammates knew where this was going. When he was angry, there was no stopping Jeongguk. Nobody else could get set to, and all they could do was hope there would at least be some sort of rally.
Kill after kill, he destroyed any chance for the other team to get a point in. All of his irritation channeled into his palm, forcing the volleyball past the fingers of middle blockers, ripping their defense apart.
Nobody talked him, fuck, nobody dared to approach Jeongguk whenever he was in the zone. Despite the fatigue gnawing at his knees, his palms reddened and numbed, sweat slicking his entire body, and his uneven breathing on the brink of suffocating him, everyone knew.
Jeon Jeongguk was untouchable when enraged.
Veins protruded from his arms, trembling, aching beneath the sheen of sweat that coated each chiseled muscle. Adrenaline surged through every inch of his body, powering his every move, devouring him.
The crowd's screams melted into ringing static in his ears. All he could focus on was hitting that fucking ball over and over again until his hand print was on that ball. But that wasn't the only thing that stole his attention.
On Jimin's neck were hickies. Hickies given to him by Specs, and it was fucking impossible to not see them.
They were in Jeongguk's line of sight— the splotches of dark purples blending into Jimin's fair skin. Every time his gaze fell on them, a scream teared through his throat, calling the ball for himself, wanting to unleash his fucking agitation on a kill.
He wasn't so sure why he was mad in the first place. Parly it was because Taehyung lied to him; he was meeting Jimin behind his back. Then again, the point of their plan was to win Jimin over, but he let himself foolishly believe he meant something to Taehyung.
In Taehyung's eyes, he felt more like his himself more than he did in his entire life. With Taehyung, he wasn't lonely, and for once, he was happy to have a fucking friend, or whatever they were.
A real friend that maybe valued him.
And there was the fact he let his defenses slip ever so easily around Taehyung like an amateur. He was too fucking blinded by his emotions, feelings he should not have allowed himself the privilege to feel.
He supposed it was a harsh reminder what their agreement was in the beginning. No feelings. No friendships.
Nothing but a selfish deal.
With all honesty, he needed it. Needed to remember that what they were doing to each other was nothing but meaningless.
"Jeongguk, you need to stop," Yugyeom murmured, approaching the older during a timeout. They were already fifteen points into the second set, and all the points were of course, scored by Jeongguk with the occasional point from their middle blockers.
"When people say they want you to aggressively spike a ball to their face, they were joking."
"You're seriously going to injure your palm if you don't calm down," San handed him an ice pack, forcefully grabbing his hitting hand and placing it on his vibrant red palm.
Jeongguk winced, trying to take it back, but the libero was too stubborn. San gave him a death glare, challenging him to pull away, and eventually he gave in with a roll of his eyes.
"Thank you," San muttered, "you violent rabbit."
"Let others get a chance, cap. You need to save yourself for the rest of the season," Yugyeom tried to reason with him as Jeongguk hung his head, staring hard at the floor while San iced his hand.
"I know what Parker over there did wasn't cool, but you should ease up a bit. Talk to Taehyung about it. It could be some misunderstanding," The younger sighed, lowering his voice only for Jeongguk to hear.
"Honestly, I don't think Taehyung meant it."
"There's nothing to talk about," Jeongguk gritted his teeth together, glancing up briefly to see Jimin staring calmly at him.
"And he meant it," He added softly, hurt lacing his gentle words.
"Dude, he literally got hickies from your man," He rolled his eyes, not hearing him. "I know I shipped ya'll but I change my mind. That's some fucked up shit right there."
"Yugs, not the time," San scolded him, elbowing his shoulder. "What he's saying, is that you need to calm down and tak—,"
"—Get your fucking act together Jeon," Jimin cut in, cutting off San, his words silencing the entire team. Jeongguk's head whipped up, gaze falling on Jimin who was staring at him boredly.
"This is elementary behavior. I thought you'd be more mature."
"Me? Mature? Fucking look at you, Chim," Jeongguk snarled, swatting San away from him, seething red. "Who the fuck shows up to games with hickies?"
"I didn't ask for these. Taehyung gave them to me," Jimin merely shrugged. Jeongguk tried to step forward, but Yugyeom and San held him back.
"And why are you so heated, Ggukie? It's not like he's yours," The blonde said, lips curling into a false frown.
"He's interested in me, remember?"
Jeongguk said nothing, knowing his words were the truth he couldn't deny. He inhaled sharply, feeling his heart squeeze in his chest. He swept the faces of his teammates, jaw clenched tight a muscle visibly twitched beneath his sweat-drenched skin as he breathed heavily.
"Set a better example for your team," Jimin snapped calmly, features unmoving. "You're the captain. Learn to control your emotions, but if you can't,"
"Why call yourself a fucking leader?"
"Parkson that's enough," Yugyeom started, but the shorter boy hand shot up, silencing him.
"No, he needs to listen. If he wants to get personal, he needs to speak up," Jimin spat, and for a moment he swore he meant something else. "Right now, your feelings are invalid on this court. Get. Your. Shit. Together."
Jimin was right. He was right. Jeongguk swallowed, shoving Yugyeom and San's grip on him off to take a step closer to the older, words loaded like bullets on his tongue. Jimin glared up at him, arms crossed tightly over his chest.
"What are you doing, Chim?" He found himself saying instead, his words breathy as they slipped past his lips. Jimin eyed him up and down, mouth fluttering into a grimace.
"I'm not setting to you anymore."
"You can't do that to me," Jeongguk growled, shaking his head furiously. "I'm the fucking captain."
"Right now, you don't sound like one," Jimin bit back. Jeongguk stood straighter, ready to argue but the setter seemed to have already made up his mind.
"Face it, Jeongguk," He murmured, shoving past him and returning to the court when the referees blew the whistle, signifying the end of the timeout.
"You're nothing without me."
The other team was pooling onto the court, getting back into position. Even his own teammates were taking their post, but before Jeongguk could leave with Yugyeom, San grabbed his shoulder, stopping him. Right before he could argue, he noticed he was already replaced.
"You should cool down, Jeongguk. Let us handle it now," San murmured, pulling Jeongguk back to the dreaded bench. He glanced back and forth between the court and Jimin, fuming.
"I need to get out there," Jeongguk spat, desperation suddenly lacing his tone, "You don't get it. Volleyball is the only thing I have going for me, San. You can't just take that away from me."
You can't take volleyball from me. I already let him take Taehyung.
"And we aren't. We're just saying sit down and take a breather. Jimin not setting to you will only piss you off more," San said, brows furrowed.
"You aren't fucking listening to me!"
Jeongguk scoffed, rolling his eyes. He wanted to argue, demand that the coach put him back in his rightful position as their wing hitter, but he noticed everyone in the entire gym was staring at him. He sucked in a shaky breath, realizing he was keeping the game from going.
Somewhere in the crowd, he could feel Taehyung staring at him, asking him silently what was wrong.
Fuck, don't think about him like that.
"I am. But we need you to calm down. When you do, I promise to talk to coach into letting you in, alright? Just please, sit," San tugged his arm, tone serious.
Jeongguk swallowed, finally giving in to the libero. He exhaled in frustration, crashing down on the bench, the feeling foreign. In all his years of playing, never was he accustomed to sitting on the sidelines.
And yet, here he was, sitting on the bench while he watched Jimin set to another player that wasn't him.
What more was Jimin going to take from him?
Eventually, they won the game with ease, and it didn't really shock him to be honest. Their team was the best out of the entire prefecture, but what irked him was the fact he didn't play. He spent the rest of the game, sitting, but there was nothing he could do about it.
Back in the lockerroom, he ignored his teammates celebrating around him, bolting straight to his locker to shower and change. All he wanted to do was try and forget about his shitty mood while he eased the burning in his fatigued muscles, but he just couldn't focus on anything else.
Taehyung plagued his mind, and those hickies. Fuck, those hickies. He needed to get a grip of himself, but even when he closed his eyes that was all he saw.
"Woah, Jeongguk," Yugyeom said as he peeled his jersey off, the cool air in the lockerroom stinging his overheated skin. He rubbed his palm, wincing slightly at the tenderness as bruises began to sprout on his skin.
"What?" Jeongguk asked tiredly, holding his hands out for Yugyeom. The younger turned his arms over, gaze hardened when he showed Jeongguk the little speckles of bruises dotting his arms. Funny. He never got bruises.
"That bracelet really hurt your arms," Yugyeom murmured, releasing his grip from Jeongguk's wrists. "You need to take it off."
Jeongguk opened his mouth to tell him he couldn't, that there was no way he could take the blue beads off. He stared down at it, wincing when he peeled it off his wrist, the bracelet digging into his circulation from being repeatedly hit with a ball.
The skin beneath it was bruised and blueish in tone, and he supposed he probably shouldn't play with a bracelet on— now that was stupid. Part of him didn't want to take it off, knowing that was all of Specs that he gave to him.
It was a piece, not the entire person, yet it still meant something to him. Yet the other half knew he had to take it off to protect himself. He couldn't afford to get hurt again. Jeongguk stood there, rolling the beads between his fingers, mind torn apart.
He took it off.
Sighing, he shoved it into his pants pocket hanging out of his locker and stormed away toward the showers before the regret could devour him anymore than it already did.
♡♡♡
Jeongguk didn't like attending parties, but of course, Namjoon coerced him into coming anyways.
They weren't ragers; if they were, his dad would find out, and they would all be screwed. Call it controlled chaos bottled in Namjoon's penthouse dorm. The music wasn't blasted, and people made sure to stay leveled, but people got drunk off their asses.
And although he hated drinking, Jeongguk was one of those people— to an extent.
Even though they won, he still felt like he lost.
He leaned against the open doorway to the kitchen, third beer bottle in his clutch as he surveyed the dorm. Most of the people were athletes of all kinds, others were leadership kids, some were popular party goers, and the rest were just random faces.
Yugyeom and San never went to these parties, and when Jeongguk invited them after the game, they simply declined and said they were going to go back to their dorm. Jeongguk didn't force them of course; he wasn't a total asshole.
It would have been nice to have somebody to talk to.
Yoongi and Namjoon ignored him at parties despite the fact they begged him to go to them.
When Jimin and he were still friends, they spent their time talking in the corner, drunk off their asses and laughing about incredibly stupid jokes. It felt nice to have a friend without worrying about anything else.
That was the past, and the last time they were drunk was the reason they were in this mess.
Jeongguk took a swig of beer, realizing Jimin was nowhere to be seen. He wondered if he went with Taehyung some place, and a part of him worried about Jimin taking advantage of the inexperienced boy, but Taehyung seemed to be doing well on his own.
He wasn't sure if it was the alcohol affecting him, but he supposed the bitterness in his mouth was because of Specs choosing Jimin.
Taehyung. He couldn't stop thinking about him even if he filled his system with alcohol, hoping to just clear his thoughts and exist without a worry, yet he couldn't. His mind, his heart wouldn't let him.
Specs choosing Jimin was default at the beginning of this. Fuck, he knew Taehyung wasn't going to give a shit about him, and yet, he carelessly let his feelings get involved. Let himself become his friend, knowing damn well that wouldn't end on good terms.
Jeongguk wasn't a fucking idiot; he knew something was different when he kissed Specs that first time.
It wasn't anything cheesy, or cliche like a epiphany about how much he loved him. It was nothing like that, and of course, he viewed Specs as a friend, but his body wanted the other thing.
He found himself wanting to touch Taehyung, to kiss him, which wasn't good. He couldn't treat Specs like another fuck just because he was sexually attracted to him. That wasn't right. They were friends.
And he could just imagine the look of hurt flash across Taehyung's features when he told him all he could think about was fucking him.
"Hey, I knew you would come!" He heard Namjoon shout over the collective chatter of people crammed into the room. Jeongguk glanced up, swallowing when he realized it was Jimin, but he wasn't alone.
Jimin and Taehyung.
What a fucking great surprise.
Jeongguk's gaze met Jimin's for a brief moment, and he could of sworn the blonde took a step closer to Taehyung, sparing him an all-knowing smirk. He sighed, rolling his eyes and slipped into the kitchen, getting away before his own lungs could suffocate him.
There was a couple people in the kitchen, though it wasn't as crowded as the main living space. He took his place by the kitchen counters, leaning against one as he swirled the remaining beer in his bottle, debating whether or not to chug it.
Right before he could chug it, somebody tapped his shoulder.
"You're Jeongguk right? The ace?" It was a girl. He looked her over, pressing the rim of the bottle to his lips.
She was shorter than him, small breasted, had long black hair that fell to below her chest and a face full of makeup complimenting the school's colors.
Not exactly his type, and he wasn't in the mood to fuck around, but he supposed he could use some company even if he wasn't going to listen to her the entire time.
"That's me," Jeongguk said, boredome lacing his words. A smile lit up her features as she stepped closer, snatching a beer can from behind him.
"I wanted to know you looked really cool at the game," She tilted her head up to look at him, her lips pressed into a sultry smile as she opened the can.
"Some said you looked angry, but I thought you were just super focused. It was kinda hot." Oh, she was flirting. Nice. So cool. He was totally interested!
"I guess," He decided to say 'fuck it' and threw his head back, letting the rest of the bitter liquid travel down his throat. When he was done, he kept his gaze trained ahead, not in the mood to meet her eyes.
She continued to talk on about volleyball and other things that honestly didn't interest Jeongguk in the slightest bit. He kept nodding along, and somewhere he grabbed another beer to replace his empty one, pretending that he was invested into their little chat.
Whatever her name was wasn't a bad person. She sounded sweet, and if he cared a bit more, maybe he would have actually listened. Maybe, if Taehyung just didn't occupy the entirety of his mind, he would give somebody else a chance.
Fill his thoughts with a person that he shouldn't regret wanting.
But he couldn't. The longer he stood there, the more his mind wandered to Taehyung, wanting to know if he was okay, or at least if Jimin was taking care of him properly. All he could think about was if he was safe— he wasn't a party goer at all.
Fuck, Specs probably didn't drink alcohol. Well, he mentioned the occasional wine glass with his dads, but besides that Taehyung probaby wasn't a drinker.
Something tugged in Jeongguk's chest, and he knew he had to go find his friend, to ease the worry eating him up, but he couldn't. He couldn't move, and there was no way he was going to face Taehyung like this.
It was probably the alcohol talking anyways.
"A lot of people wonder why a guy like you is still single. You're literally perfect," She chuckled, her hand resting on his chest.
"Anybody would want to get with you."
It took most of his willpower to not roll his eyes at her not-so subtle attempts to get him to kiss her, or at least fuck her. Just as he was about to tell the girl he was going to go back to his dorm, from the corner of his eyes there was no way he could miss Taehyung enter a room.
Taehyung was looking around, probably lost, and when he recognized Jeongguk, he waved at him. But that wasn't what Jeongguk was focused on.
It was the hickies on his neck.
"Are you saying you want to get with me?" He swallowed, averting his gaze to the girl. He didn't know what he was doing, but he could feel the older's eyes on him, watching.
"Was it not obvious enough for you?" The girl said, smirking. "Will you let me?"
"I'm thinking about it," He shrugged, taking another swig of beer for good measure. Fuck, Specs was still staring at him. "You know what? Fuck it."
He kissed her— it was what she wanted anyways. His lips crashed against hers, moving fluidly as the taste of beer stained his tongue. He slowly opened his eyes, glancing over where Taehyung stood, his chest shamelessly doing flips when he realized he was watching.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss as their tongues clashed. It was sloppy, and saliva dribbled around her chin, and he blamed it on his fuzzy reaction, but his free hand slipped to her waist, knowing that the older was looking at him.
It honestly didn't feel right. It wasn't Taehyung's waist.
They kissed one another hastily, as if she wanted to savor the moment for forever, but Jeongguk really wasn't on the same page and tried to hurry it along. His teeth teased at her lip, emitting a moan from the stranger, one that didn't quite settle right in his ears as he devoured the sound.
Taehyung, on the otherhand, hadn't moved one bit.
He took it up a notch. He pulled away, trailing kisses behind her ear down to the soft curve of her jaw. It was different, than Taehyung. When he kissed the older, his lips brushed against the faintest scrape of stubble, and it drove him fucking wild.
But this wasn't Taehyung, and when he kissed her, his heart didn't race. It felt more of like a chore, and the only thing driving him was her want, the beer thriving throughout his system, and Taehyung's indecipherable stare.
Fuck, all he could think about was Taehyung as he kissed her. He could feel his soft skin beneath his calloused touch and grab at his ass, his favorite ass, and nip at his neck to hear his low, throaty moans. He could trace his nose against his throat, heart fluttering whenever he giggled.
He could remember the shape of his gentle mouth on his, fitting like a missing puzzle piece. The way he grabbed his jaw, letting him know he was there, ready to take control.
The way his moans filled him up, and all Jeongguk wanted to do was hear them beneath him.
He was kissing down her neck, sucking hickies on places he knew people could see. Taehyung's stare was creating holes into his skin. And for some reason, it kept him going, feeling oddly vulnerable when Taehyung stared at him like that.
Though he knew, he wanted Taehyung to keep staring. To see what he was doing. To feel, if it was possible, what he felt when he saw him with Jimin.
A taste of payback, burning on his tongue, tugging at his heart. Taehyung. Taehyung. Taehyung. His name drove him to the brink of insanity, and he wasn't sure what he was feeling, what this was.
And soon, Taehyung left.
He pushed the girl off, rolling his eyes when he realized hers were squeezed shut, expecting more that he couldn't give. He continued to drink from his bottle, ignoring the way she tugged at his sleeve and focused directly on the spot where Specs stood, watching him.
A smirk twitched on his lips, and he allowed it to stretch across his slightly swollen mouth. He was practically chaos controlled, but whenever it came to Taehyung, he was a disaster waiting to happen.
This was a whole fucking disaster, but did Jeongguk care? He didn't know. He knew nothing except he pictured kissing Taehyung the entire time, and his feelings were a fucking tangled mess he couldn't bear navigating.
Perhaps it was the alcohol talking, and maybe it could have been the truth. Taehyung made him feel everything and nothing at all.
"Why aren't you doing anything?" The girl asked, breathless. Jeongguk glanced over at her, and a part of him wanted to tell her to fuck off, but he knew that was too mean.
"I think you should go back to your dorm," He said, the edge of the bottle pressing against his lips. "It's late. You should go."
"You're drunk, and there could be some creeps."
She opened her mouth to speak up, but Jeongguk simply raised an eyebrow at her, and she gave in. He sighed, enjoying the silence as he continued to drink, going from his fourth to his fifth in a blur.
His shoulders seemed to relax despite the dull aching sensation lingering in his muscles. He scoffed under his breath, examining his palm, eyeing the little bruises dotting his skin. It hurt to move, but he ignored it.
Sighing, he slipped his palm into his pants pocket, frowning a little when his fingers brush against beads. He dug around and managed to pull the blue bracelet out, thumbing the letters carefully as he stared down at his palm.
Jeongguk swallowed, remembering the reason why he took it off. It was hurting him, but somewhere in him wanted to wear it again. After all, Specs gave it to him.
Eventually, he slipped it back onto his wrist, telling himself he would be more careful next time. A few minutes later, he pushed off the counter and left his drink, deciding maybe it was his turn to go home while he could still walk.
When he entered the living room, he noticed his 'friends' crowded around the stupid pingpong table Namjoon that he made Jeongguk beg his dad to let into his room. They were playing beer pong, and at the other end was Taehyung and Jimin.
Jeongguk stood in the center, watching the way Specs had his arm draped over Jimin. He wasn't drinking, and he supposed Taehyung was smart enough to not need him.
Fuck, what was he even thinking anymore? His head was a mess. He carded his fingers through his hair, realizing there was no use in staying, and left.
♡♡♡
Jeongguk blinked rapidly, wondering what the fuck happened as he woke up on a bed that certainly wasn't his. He squinted, head pounding as he felt something cool and wet on his forehead.
He pushed himself onto his forearms, surveying the dark room, confused. He couldn't see anything, for the room was too dim, and everything seemed to blend into the shadows.
Just as he was about to get up, a hand pushed down on his chest.
"Lie back down," A deep voice drawled, and it took him a moment to realize he was on Taehyung's bed.
"Why am I here?" He let Taehyung's gentle touch remove the towel from his forehead and set it on the sidetable beside them.
"You passed out on the couch, and I couldn't just leave you there," Taehyung propped himself up to match Jeongguk's gaze, the younger trying to ignore the fact their chests were pressed against one anotherms.
"So you brought me into your room?"
"Correct. Good observation skills," Taehyung rolled his eyes in the dark, though Jeongguk could make out a smile if he focused enough.
"You know what happens in rooms right?" Jeongguk asked, glad to see he wasn't completely shit-faced, but his veins were still humming.
"Yes, sleep," The older murmured, nudging his foot with his own. "You're just as dirty drunk."
Jeongguk opened his mouth to argue, but there, in the darkness, his gaze caught something. For a second, he thought they were shadows, but he wasn't that stupid.
It was the hickies.
He swallowed, silencing as he slowly reached out, fingers touching the hardened bone of Taehyung's collarbones. He traced around one of the bruises, throat tight as he felt Taehyung's gaze settle on him.
"Why aren't you asleep?" Jeongguk asked, voice softening as he pressed down on one of the tender bruises, heart racing when Taehyung shivered beneath him.
"Because I'm waiting for you to sleep," Taehyung said. "You're drunk."
"Not anymore. I'm sober," It wasn't really a lie, but he could tell Taehyung raised an eyebrow at him.
"What? My brain isn't fuzzy anymore."
"Well yeah, because I was taking care of you," The older murmured, his fingers curling around the younger's wrist.
"You were what?" Jeongguk frowned, trying to keep his voice down when he glanced over at the clock, seeing that it was three in the morning.
"You were burning up, so I panicked and tried to cool you down. We have a freaking test tomorrow, so you owe me one," Taehyung whispered back.
"You should have let me perish."
"You were drunk, not dying on the battlefield."
"Let me perish when I want to," Jeongguk said, though he couldn't deny the way his heart began to betray him and started to thump faster.
"No, I won't. You can't perish until you get into that Olympic team," Taehyung murmured, easing his fingers as he took Jeongguk's palm into his own, gently running his thumb over the bruises.
"You hurt yourself. I was worried."
"Why were you worried?" His voice got caught in his throat as he felt Taehyung trace little shapes over his aching palm.
"Because I'm your roommate . Your friend," He said like it was obvious. "And I know very well how much volleyball means to you." He swallowed.
"Please, stop hurting yourself. The game was scary to watch."
"Did I scare you?" The younger whispered, features easing when the older's brought his palm to his face, gently pressing a kiss on one of the bruises.
"Kinda," Taehyung admitted, continuing to gently massage his palm. "Thought you were gonna kill someone with a spike. Maybe even pop the ball."
"I'm sorry," Jeongguk said, "I didn't mean to scare you." Now that wasn't a lie.
"It's nothing," The older let go of his hand, his fingers resting against his chest. "You were just in the zone. I get that. And if you want to talk about it, I'm right here."
Well he did want to talk about it, but how in the hell was he going to explain to his friend that he didn't like it when he kissed Jimin. Gave him hickies.
It shouldn't have bothered him anyways; he knew that. Fuck, he really was a mess earlier that night.
His breathing slowed as he stared at Specs, his cheek now leaning against his arm which he bent beneath his head. His mind, for once, was oddly clear in the older's presence, yet the confusion that stirred in his tummy remained.
What did he feel around Taehyung? Sure, he was a good friend, and he enjoyed his company. Then there was the fact he wanted to fuck him, and also the fact that he kinda wanted his dick in his ass, too.
Just for science, of course. Nothing else.
But did he really want it? He didn't know if it was just the inner need for sex raging in his hormones, or he was just being an idiot.
Probably the latter, but it didn't stop him from running his hand up Taehyung's chest, the cusp of his palm slotting against the side of his neck. He tilted Taehyung's head to the side, face inching near his, feeling his breath tickle his cheek.
"You gonna kiss me again?" Taehyung murmured, his voice thick with something Jeongguk didn't have the energy to analyze.
"Do you want me to?" Jeongguk asked, gently stroking his thumb over Taehyung's neck.
"Do you want to?" He raised an eyebrow at him.
"Kinda. Yeah," The younger whispered, lips hovering over his. "I want to."
And he did. He placed his lips hesitantly over the older's, shoulders relaxing as the sensation of his mouth on his seemed to sharpen his sense. It was lazy, not at all rushed, their exhaustion pouring into a gesture like this.
Jeongguk popped his lips off of Taehyung's, staring down at him from the angle he was at, his hand now placed on his cheek. The older met his narrowed gaze, silently asking questions he didn't have answrs to.
Is this what he really wanted from him? Might as well find out, Jeongguk thought as he leaned down once more, capturing his lips into his own.
Something was different this time around, and he wasn't sure if it was the way they paused every now and then, just listening to the sound of their breaths before moving their lips languidly against one another's.
Then suddenly, his hands were gripping onto the older's face, pulling him closer, the blankets rustling beneath his weight. The kiss deepened, his tongue pressing past his parted lips and entering his mouth, tasting him as saliva messily dribbled down his chin.
Somewhere along the lines, Jeongguk ended up on top of him, feeling Taehyung's strong grip hold onto his hips, holding him in place. He kissed him, needy, brows furrowed, wanting more and more.
Heartbeat bashing against his chest, head splitting in to two, Jeongguk popped his lips off of Taehyung's, a string of saliva connecting their kiss-swollen lips. He watched the older wipe his chin, the string breaking as Taehyung's eyes fixated on him, and him only.
"Are you sure?" Jeongguk murmured, the words falling out before he could catch them.
"You know what you're doing," Taehyung said, sliding his fingers beneath his thin shirt.
"Do it. Teach me."
Jeongguk broke the contact, inching down further, feeling Taehyung's slightly hardened cock against his ass. He inhaled sharply, peppering kisses down the older's neck, eyeing those damn hickies with hatred as he left new ones, bigger ones on places only he could see.
His body acted on need, this want he couldn't quite figure out if actually did want it, but he kept going, and soon Taehyung's shirt was off, forgotten on the floor.
He trailed kisses down his chest, glancing up at the older, waiting for a sign that he wanted him to stop. Fuck, Taehyung's stomach was soft and smooth compared to his own, and he couldn't help himself from leaving a hickey below his rib.
Jeongguk didn't think about anything else except doing this, fuck he needed this, and skipped past the stupid build-up as he got down to Taehyung's waistband, impatient.
The older sat a little up, his back leaning against the headboard as Jeongguk steadily met his stare. He swallowed, noticing him nod his head in the dark.
"I trust you."
His fingers slipped beneath his waist band, gently pulling down his pajama bottoms (they were cute cats but he ignored it) down his hips, gulping when he noticed the print of his hard-on straining behind his underwear.
Fuck, he was so hung. Jeongguk licked his wet lips, glancing over at Taehyung as he pressed a light kiss to the fabric, mouthing at his hard cock beneath the material. Taehyung shivered under his touch, his hand finding its way to his hair.
Jeongguk couldn't stand teasing him, wanting to get this over with to find the answer he wanted, to get the satisfaction he though he desperately desired.
He pushed his underwear away, breath hitching in his throat when Taehyung's dick sprung out of the fabric. He wasn't joking when he said eight inches. It was massive, veins throbbing in his grip, and fuck his mouth watered.
He didn't know how it was going to fit into his mouth as he coiled his trembling fingers around it.
Taehyung's grip on his locks tightened, the sting worsening his head ache, but none of it mattered as Jeongguk gently ran his hand up his length, thumb pressing into the slit, already leaking.
He trailed his lips down its side, alternating between open-mouthed kisses and little licks that had him groaning. He felt the older tense beneath him as he dragged his tongue around the tip, flicking into the slit teasingly, his pre cum bitter.
Taehyung hissed when Jeongguk's hot mouth sunk onto his dick, his tongue pressing his shaft to the roof of his mouth. He slid down slowly, the burn straining his throat. He gagged, tears springing to his eyes when his cock slammed against the back of his throat.
He wasn't even fully in his mouth yet.
Jeongguk pulled back slightly, deciding to bob his head up and down because there was no use— he was too big, too thick that the skin around his mouth dully ached. He inhaled sharply through his nose, squeezing his cock before sinking down again.
His eyes fluttered shut, though his heart twitched hearing Taehyung's low, gutteral moans fill the room. He hollowed out his mouth to the best of his ability while his hand around his dick pumped his length, emitting moans out of the older.
"F-fuck Jeongguk," Taehyung groaned lowly, his hips bucking up to match Jeongguk's pace. "I— fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck."
He winced when Taehyung yanked at his hair, but it kept him going, his own painful hard cock twitching in the constraints of his pants. He nearly choked when Taehyung thrusted into his mouth, almost shoving his cock down his throat.
"F-fuck you're so good at this," The older breathed, moaning loudly when Jeongguk quickened his pace, heart racing at the praise even though his throat was on fire.
"S-so good," Even though this wasn't his best work, and he totally bit off more he could chew, Jeongguk knew the older was close.
He pulled his mouth off, watching as Taehyung threw his head back, swearing loudly as he jerked him off, wrist flicking up and down as he helped him chase his orgasm.
Right before Taehyung was going to cum, he took the older's cock into his mouth, working him while his hips bucked upwards, meeting every bob of his head.
"J-Jeongguk," Taehyung choked out his name in a heavy moan, releasing into his mouth.
Jeongguk squeezed his eyes shut, swallowing every drip of his release, languidly easing him through his orgasm as the older cried out, tugging at his hair so hard he was crying tears of his own.
When Taehyung came down from his high, he was breathing heavily, hands covering his reddened face as Jeongguk popped his lips, wiping at the edge of his lips. His chest rose and fell unevenly as he sat there, gaze flitting between Taehyung's limp cock and the older's fucked-out expression.
He expected himself to want more, to want to take Taehyung right there and fuck into him all of his frustrations while he screamed his name.
But he didn't. He didn't want that anymore.
Suddenly, it was like everything was clear, and he realized this was stupid. He shouldn't be wanting this from Taehyung— he shouldn't be doing this to him. This wasn't right; Taehyung was his friend.
His only friend that mattered.
Fuck, he could still taste his cum on his tongue, but all of that didn't seem to mean shit when he saw his bracelet around his wrist. The red beads were hard to miss, and there, his heart dropped.
Taehyung was still wearing his bracelet.
"Jeongguk, are you okay?" Taehyung asked softly, breathless. "Do you want me to—,"
"—No. Just no," Jeongguk murmured, staring at his lap when Taehyung sat up, tucking his dick away before scooting next to the younger.
"C'mon. I can't suck you off good, but I can jerk you off if you want?" Taehyung whispered. He watched his hand reach up, but before he could swat him away, he realized he was wiping cum off his lips.
"Are you okay, Gguk?"
"T-Tae, we're friends, right?" Jeongguk's voice shook as he realized he fucked up. He fucked up big time with the only person that treated him like a decent human being.
Fuck, why did he do this? Sure, it made things clear that all he wanted was to be Taehyung's friend, but this was wrong.
It was so, so wrong. He didn't want Taehyung in that way.
"Of course we are," Taehyung murmured, brows furrowing when Jeongguk got off the bed, running hands anxiously through his hair.
"Why do you ask?" He whispered, trying to reach after him to pull him back, but Jeongguk shook his head, stepping away.
"We need to act like it," Jeongguk muttered. The older raised an eyebrow at him. The younger inhaled shakily, swearing inwardly at himself for even thinking of Taehyung like that.
"I said," Jeongguk's legs carried him to the door, the younger refusing to turn around, not wanting to see the older's reaction.
"If we're friends, we need to act like it."
And he left because now he knew, he shouldn't want him for his body, for the sex no matter how tempting it was. That wasn't something he wanted, and even though things were a confusing mess, that was just as clear as his love for volleyball.
Taehyung was so much more than just a fuck he could forget about.
♡♡♡
hahaha i love hurting
and i love you guys 🤧💛