“I changed my mind.”
Mitch chewed on his lip as he looked up at the blonde on the other side of the kitchen counter who had the beginnings of panic in his eyes once again. It was barely after 11 am and the morning had already been a bit of a rollercoaster
“We talked about this. I will be here, I will be safe.”
“What if you’re not?”
He chewed on his lip. “C’mon, Sylvia, let’s sit.” He finished pouring Scott’s dr pepper and grabbed himself a bottle of water before he went over to the couch. Scott still didn’t seem to move.
“I know I said it would be better to try it this way, but I can’t do it.”
Mitch almost felt like a parent as he set the drinks down on the coasters he’d put out on the coffee table and headed over to his best friend. “C’mere.” He took both of his hands in his and tugged him towards the couch. When they were both comfy and seated he continued the conversation they’d been having since they got back from their very quick, very awkward Starbucks run. Scott was like a hawk, constantly searching for danger where there was none. He was getting used to the strange treatment, but he hated the weight it was pushing down onto Scott’s shoulders.
“What do you think is going to happen to me if I stay here?”
His lip twitched, eyes darting around before finally focusing on his knee as he thought about it. “What if he knows where we live.”
“Then he could come in here any time he wanted. He wouldn’t wait for you to leave.”
“What if he is? What if he’s just biding his time until I leave you alone and he hurts you again. What if he takes you away from me.”
“Scott, you know I love you, but what do you honestly think you could do if he really wanted to come in here and hurt us. We can’t let him win. We can’t be scared all the time. It’s over, it’s been over. I’m still here.”
“Mitchie... I can’t lose you.”
“I’m not going anywhere. It’ll be a quick trip to the grocery store with Jake, Hayden and Will and Kirstie and Jeremy will be here with me ok?”
“Kirstie can’t protect you.”
“It’s not about that. We will lock the doors, chain and all. They’re bringing Olaf and if anyone tries to come in he’ll know.”
Scott was obviously not happy about the situation.
He knew this was going to be a true test of Scott’s mental state. He also knew that he would worry about Scott being out there, but between the musketeers he knew he would be ok. Any of them would give their lives for him without question.
“I know it’s hard, but just try? For me?”
The blonde sighed, knowing he was going to be useless at shopping when the entire time he’d only be able to think of Mitch and wonder if he was ok, but if Mitch asked him, then he would at least try.
_____________
Five weeks later
Things somehow began to get better. Scott still wouldn’t let Mitch leave the building without him, but if Mitch promised to stay in the apartment with the doors locked and his phone in his hand at all times (Mitch never followed that last rule but Scott didn’t know that) then he would go out for quick trips to the store or shopping etc. With help from their friends they were slowly extending the trips and leaving Mitch was getting just a bit easier with each successful trip.
Mitch was partially grateful and also partially hated his newfound freedom (well ish). He’d gotten so used to Scott being close by that he missed him when he was gone, plus he was BORED. He’d scrolled through tumblr so many times while cooped up that he could probably archive it all from memory. It also didn’t help that Scott’s paranoia was rubbing off. Every noise he couldn’t explain, every creak, every footstep or voice from the hallway caused his heart to race just a bit. But he continued to work at it and just kept telling himself that things would eventually be ok.
They finally thought Scott well enough to do a couple of appearances with PTX, and every time the conversation changed over to the bank situation Mitch handled it and gave quick, vague answers, letting their interviewer know without actually saying that it wasn’t to be delved into any further.
They had a few meetings with RCA who, while trying to be understanding and tactful, also made it very clear that the press storm from Mitch and Scott’s run in with danger had all but reached its end and if they waited much longer to take advantage of it then they would miss a golden opportunity. They wanted the two of them to go on every talk show in existence, it’s not like they hadn’t already been requesting it, but Mitch shot it down immediately. There was no way Scott was ready to talk about it, and if he couldn’t then he wouldn’t be able to let Mitch out of his sight long enough to do an interview on his own.
Every meeting left them all exhausted and nothing ever seemed to get resolved.
The only thing that did seem to move forward was the music. They’d all done quite a bit of writing during the off time and it didn’t take long before they were back in the studio again. The long nights and days, the group sessions they had while working through everything helped keep their minds off of the bad things that happened and things seemed to get easier and easier.
By this point Scott and Kevin were practically living at the studio, which gave Mitch quite a bit more freedom. As long as Kevin was sure to text him when Scott would leave the studio, then he could leave the apartment without him even knowing. Just being out on his own again felt foreign. He felt almost lost as he tried to go shopping on his own or to pick up food. More often than not, he wouldn’t stay out for more than hour before he was right back in the comfort and safety of his apartment, but the fresh air and change of scenery was still nice.
He was currently alone, fighting off sleep while he 'watched' a pokemon marathon. It was just past midnight and still Scott hadn’t gotten home from the studio. He just couldn’t bring himself to sleep until he knew he was home. (If his mother could see him now) Kevin had sent him a text around 10:30 letting him know that he was leaving Scott alone. It wasn’t really anything new. Before the incident Scott tended to get so immersed in his work that he lost track of time until it was 1 or 2 am before he realized how late it had gotten. He was actually a bit relieved that the blonde had gotten used to being alone once again, enough so that he had let go of his nightmares and fears and was able to throw himself into the music. Well, he was relieved until he tried texting and 15 minutes later he still hadn’t gotten an answer. He tried calling and still nothing.
He gave him 10 more minutes before calling again.
Ok, I’m probably overreacting. This is normal, right? He used to do this all the time.
Yeah, but he’s never NOT answered when you check on him.
But maybe his phone is on silent.
He got up from the couch, debating over what he should do. He slowly began to pace back and forth. One last call attempt and he was pulling on the first sweater he could find which happened to be Scott's. Shoes, check, phone, check, keys, bingo.
He turned off the tv and was out the door and headed to the studio.
Scott’s car was the only one in the parking lot. He walked inside, searching until he found him…. sleeping. He sighed as he walked over to the chair the man had fallen asleep on in the most awkward position. He was surprised he hadn’t fallen out of it yet.
He started going around making sure to shut everything down and save what needed to be saved. Once it was all taken care of he went back over to his friend.
“Scottie? C’mon wake up.”
He had to take his hand and tug at his pinky until he started to stir. When the man realized where he was his eyes widened. He looked up at Mitch and was on his feet in seconds, teetering as the vertigo hit him.
“What are you doing here?”
“What am I doing here, what are you doing here. I was worried when you didn’t answer your phone!”
“You shouldn’t have left the apartment!”
“Scott-”
“NO! You need to stay home when I’m not there.”
“I’m not a child!”
“You need to be safe!”
“And you sleeping in a completely open studio is? Mary Catherine is going to murder you for leaving everything unlocked like that by the way.”
“I can take care of myself!”
“and I can’t!?”
“It’s not the same!”
“How? Scott you can be worried about me as much as you want, but I have the right to be worried about you too!”
“That’s fine but someone should have come with you! Did you even tell anyone you were coming here?”
“No, it’s like 1 am.” He pushed his glasses back up his nose as they began to slide.
“Mitch-”
“Stop. Just… stop. I don't want to fight. You’re ok, and that’s what matters. Look, I was scared when you didn’t come home and then you didn’t answer your phone and I get it… I get that you feel that way all the time.”
“I didn’t mean to scare you, but you can’t just go running around town by yourself! He got away, Mitch. The bastard that hurt you is alive and out there right now. If something had happened to you again because of me...”
“I know. I know and it’s scary having to face this, to know that he’s still out there, but Scott, you do know that it was never your fault, right? None of it. I know you think it was, that he told you it was, but it wasn’t. You don’t have to feel responsible for me and my safety. Is that why you always want to prot-”
He was cut off as lips pressed to his own, a hand moving to hold gently to his cheek. He was frozen in shock for a moment but after a few beats he responded. The larger man used his free hand to pull him against him. He couldn’t help but lick his lips after Scott pulled away just a bit.
“Of course I’m responsible” he whispered as he rest his forehead against the shorter man’s. “I know it’s different for you, that you don’t feel the same, but I can’t pretend that losing you wouldn’t kill me. I can’t pretend that you aren’t my first concern, my first priority. I love you, Mitchie. I’m sorry I keep you in a cage, but I can’t watch you go through that again.” He lifted his head and then slid the collar of the overly large sweater to the side and ran his finger over the scar on Mitch’s shoulder.
Glossy brown eyes just stared up at him, their owner not quite sure what to do.
“This is because I asked for time.” He slid his fingers over his collarbone to the other shoulder.”This is because I didn’t pick up fast enough.” He slid his hands down over the back of the sweater until they were up and underneath, fingers finding the lifts of skin that would always serve as a reminder. “Every single mark on your back is because I got so angry at the thought of them violating you.”
He shook his head, a tear sliding down his cheek as he listened to Scott’s words, his own heart pounding in his chest.
“I love you, and I failed you too many times before. I won’t do it again.”
“But you didn’t!”
“I did.”
“Scott, he’s the psycho and he would have found an excuse to hurt me no matter what you did. You did so good that day, I’m so proud of you for it, and so thankful that you did all of that for me.”
“I messed up so much.”
He shook his head. “You really didn’t. But let’s talk about this at home, ok? I’ll drive and we can get your car tomorrow. This conversation needs a bed and a fuzzy blanket. C’mon.”
Scott sniffled a bit as he let Mitch lead the way. The ride home was silent as they were both lost in their own thoughts.
Mitch was replaying the kiss over and over in his head, the electricity that had shot through his veins the moment their lips met. The ball was in his court or however that sports analogy stuff goes. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do about it.
As they walked back into the apartment Scott beelined straight for Mitch’s room as if making sure that the sleeping arrangements included the two of them in the same bed. He couldn’t help but chuckle a bit at the fact. He went and grabbed both his and Scott’s pillows from the other's bed where they’d slept the night before and tossed them at Scott’s head when he finally walked into his own room. They both giggled as they got ready for bed, a trace of tension lingering in the air. Things were the same, Scott always told him he loved him, but the kiss had put a different kind of exclamation point on it, gave it more meaning. He’d always suspected, but honestly he never thought he’d confess it as Scott was way too protective of their friendship to ever risk it, but they’d been through so much together now. If they hadn’t been bound before, they absolutely were now.
He wouldn’t have it any other way. This man had risked his life for him, protected him at all costs. This was a love he hadn’t honestly thought anyone would ever have in regards to him, but there he was, gorgeous and perfect with a heart the size of Texas itself, and he gave it to him.
“Is my hair weird or something?” Scott asked self consciously as he tucked himself in the covers, waiting for Mitch to join him.
He shook himself from his thoughts. “Your hair is always weird.”
Scott rolled his eyes in his typical way.
Mitch hurriedly got down to his boxers before climbing into bed and curling up. Scott chuckled and he could feel it beneath his cheek as he snuggled in.
“Comfy?” Two arms wrapped around him and he couldn’t remember ever feeling more safe.
“Scott shaped pillows are the best.
He smiled as he felt Scott kiss the top of his head. “Hey, Scott?”
“Yeah?”
“We’re going to be ok.”
He smiled to himself when he felt the hold tighten around him. “I hope so”
“Oh, and Scott?” He looked up at him for a sec before shifting so he could sit up. Scott did the same with a worried expression.
“Yeah?”
“Can we do that kissing thing again?”
The smile crept up his lips as he gently ran his finger over Mitch’s chin before kissing him again. After quite a few seconds they both pulled away, eyes closed, lips only millimeters apart.
“I could really get used to this.”
“You do realize i’m never letting you go, ever.” Scott nuzzled his nose against his.
“If you keep kissing me like that I’m pretty sure I can deal with that.”
They held each other close as they continued to share these new pieces of themselves before eventually falling asleep in each other’s arms.
__________
Two months later and they were back in full swing. Scott had finally eased up on Mitch, but that was because happiness was drowning out all of his fears and insecurities. Everyone was supportive of the relationship, and besides a few spats here and there, they were perfectly in sync with one another. The nightmares had finally disappeared and were now replaced with… ‘other’ types of dreams.
They were about to do only their second concert since the ‘incident’. It was a small venue and they'd scheduled two shows back to back just to test the waters. So far things had been going really well. Both shows had sold out in seconds and their latest youtube video had millions of hits in absolutely no time. Everything was finally sliding back into place.
~
He and Mitch were playing ping pong against Kirstie and Jeremy backstage when one of the makeup artists came to fetch Kirstie and Kevin.
Esther quickly jumped in and took her place.
“Y’know, I think meet and greet went really well, last night right? I mean, only everyone brought up the bank thing, but really it could have been worse.” Scott shrugged.
“Well you didn’t throw yourself between Mitch and anyone who wanted to talk to him and you even let people touch and hug him during pictures. I think that’s solid progress.” Avi tossed in from the sidelines and Esther couldn't help but giggle.
“Well let me tell you it was NOT easy.” He smirked and Mitch rolled his eyes hitting the ball back at Esther a little harder than necessary and they all burst out into giggles as they tried to search for the little white ball that had gone rogue.
Mitch leaned into Scott and somehow they ended up in each other’s arms, lips locked again. Esther rolled her eyes. “Cut it out lovebirds before I tweet a pic and out you”
Scott pulled away and stuck his tongue out at her as he hugged Mitch close.
Another voice pulled them from their spat. “Kevin’s done, Mitch you ready?”
“Ugh, fine.” He leaned up to peck Scott one last time but he was pulled in for something a bit more substantial. He giggled as Scott smacked him square on his ass and he grabbed his phone from the chair.
“I’ll come with you. I’m sure Kirstie is bored.” Jeremy put his paddle on the table.
“C’mon prince charming lets go get my face did.” They linked arms as they headed out.
“This whole makeup thing is weird.” Avi grumbled from one of the chairs.
“What, you don't like that RCA hired you guys a hair and makeup team?"
“Well I wouldn’t exactly consider it a perk.” He frowned.
“The one girl is realllly cute Avriel.” Scott smirked.
“She’s probably married.”
“Wow, ray of sunshine.” Esther shook her head.
“Hey guys, they asked me to send in Mitch.” Kevin appeared.
Scott raised an eyebrow. “They came and got him like 10 minutes ago.”
Kevin made a face. “No they didn’t I just left the hair and makeup room. Everyone’s still there.”
They all looked at each other, completely confused.
“You didn’t see Mitch or Jeremy?” Scott's brow furrowed.
He shook his head no.
The blonde was a blur as he pushed past him, hurrying out into the hallway asking everyone if they’d seen Mitch. His fingers frantically sent texts to both he and Jeremy, nervously waiting for an answer.
Esther confirmed they weren’t in the makeup room and that none of them had asked for Mitch earlier.
5 minutes later the panic began to set in. Kirstie had finally found out Jeremy was missing and everyone was searching the entire building. Security had gathered the remaining members of PTX and the crew in one room and weren’t letting them leave, guarding the door. The cops were on their way.
Scott was a mess. He kept texting, hoping and praying for an answer that he knew he wasn’t going to get. He let him go. He let him out of his sight and now he was gone again. He'd let himself believe that things were looking up, that they were going to be ok... but no.
Kirstie was a crying mess, and Avi held her close as he tried to comfort her. Kevin was doing his best to try and comfort him, but he honestly couldn’t hear a word he said. He couldn’t even cry. He just felt numb. He just knew this was it, the final curtain call.
He’d lost him.
He’d failed.