Mom and Dad were startled when Auntie Jessie told them the truth about my health condition. Mommy cried to me, but I stayed calm, because I couldn't feel anything; I was dazed. They even argued about my condition, blaming themselves for not protecting me from that sickness, which made me feel more sick. According to them, cancer had been killing our family because we inherited this sickness from our descendants. But they could no longer do something about this. It was already here. All I could do was to fight and be brave.
As the days passed by, I kept myself away from my phone, not even touching it after I deactivated my social media accounts. Everyday I was thinking of Dylan, missing him like crazy, but to avoid him was better. Although I knew that what I did would freak him out, I trusted him. Dylan was a smart guy. He wouldn't do anything that would tear us apart.
It was early in the morning when I rushed to enter the bathroom to vomit. I felt so sick and dizzy.
"Mommy!" I shouted in apprehension while still kneeling on the floor with hands fastened to the toilet bowl and breathing heavily. My eyes started to moisten in fear.
I heard the door creak open. "Demi?" It was Mommy's voice. "Oh my God! What's wrong?" She rubbed my back while I was throwing up. Afterwards, she called Daddy to take me to the hospital.
***
I just dolefully watched the gold fishes swimming in a large aquarium while we were waiting for the result of my check-up. This view reinvigorate my weak and tired body somehow. I was interrupted when Mommy called me, because the doctor finally had the result.
"You vomited not just because of your sickness . . ." the doctor told me.
My heart started to pound faster in curiosity and nervous at the same time.
"What do you mean?" Mommy asked.
"She is pregnant," the doctor replied, which made my lips parted in surprise.
"W-what?" hindi makapaniwalang sabi ni Mommy. Tumingin siya sa akin nang may pagtatanong ngunit naglihis lamang ako ng tingin at napayuko.
"This can't be," I heard Dad said in vexation.
"H-how is that, doc? How can she fight leukemia if she's pregnant?" Mommy asked.
"That's possible, ma'am. Although chemotherapy has effects in the fetus, there are reports of cases with successful pregnancy . . ." The doctor explained her more about my treatment during pregnancy. He said there was only a very small chance for the baby to survive, so they could still not assure me that they could keep my baby during my treatment, but they assured me that they would do their best to save the baby.
I was scared, but it didn't cover the joy that I felt knowing that I was carrying Dylan's child. This urged me to gain more courage to fight this battle.
My parents were silent in the car while we were going home. I didn't know what was on their mind, but I knew that they were thinking about my pregnancy.
I sat on the couch when we finally arrived at home, resting my tired body. I was about to close my eyes when I heard Dad's voice.
"Who's the father?" he asked in a serious tone.
I turned my head to him. His brows were furrowed and I could see the fire of anger in his eyes while he was looking at me. Ito ang unang pagkakataon na nakita ko siyang ganito kagalit. My heart raced in fear and tension. I even felt the guilt in my heart for fooling them for how many years. I'd made them believe that I was a good girl all the time, but here I was, carrying a baby in my womb out of the blue.
Should I tell them? I thought. I was at a loss, dithering.
After a moment Mommy also joined dad and asked, "Sweetheart, please tell us who's the father of your child. We a-accept the baby, but we need to know who's the father." She was pleading, until she started to sob. There was pain in every sob she made. I bursted into tears because of that. I was so sorry.
I turned my eyes on Daddy. Although madness was written all over his face, I saw that he was trying to control his emotions. Pawang ang pag-iyak lang namin ni Mommy ang naririnig sa loob ng bahay.
I thought for a while, deciding what to say. Kung sasabihin kong si Dylan ang ama, alam kong magagalit sila, pero natatakot ako sa maaaring maging desisyon nila. I knew how they hated the Hunt family. Hindi ko alam kung anong dapat kong gawin. Litong lito ako.
"Demi," madiin na sabi ni Daddy.
"I'm sorry," I said while crying. "I'm really sorry!"
I didn't want to deny Dylan anymore. Kay tagal ko na rin siyang itinatago sa mga magulang ko. Siguro, ito na ang pagkakataon para malaman nila, dahil wala na silang magagawa kundi tanggapin kami lalo na ngayong may buhay nang nakasalalay.
"He's my best friend. We've been friends since we were young, and he's our neighbor. He's Storm Dylan Hunt."
Shock crossed their faces. They both looked at each other before Daddy spoke to me, "Hunt?" Mas lalong nagsalubong ang mga kilay nito.
I nodded my head while still crying in front of them.
Mom braced herself, and she later stopped crying. Tila kinabahan ako dahil sa nakikita kong reaksyon sa mga mata nila. They were dead serious, seemed like they were going to do something I didn't want.
Napasunod ako ng tingin kay Daddy nang magwalk-out ito at mabilis na tinungo ang kwarto nila ni Mommy. Malakas ang pagkakasara nito sa pintuan kaya kumalabag iyon. Lumapit naman sa akin si Mommy at hinawakan ang kamay ko, kaya napatitig ako sa kanya.
"Listen, Demi. You know the situation between us and the Hunts," aniya. I nodded my head. "And we can never forgive them."
My brows furrowed. "B-but Mommy, I love Dylan and he loves me. The Hunt family has been so good to me."
"No, Demi. You listen to us! Napakalaki ng perwisyong ginawa ng pamilyang 'yan sa pamilya natin! Can't you see? We're suffering because of what they did!" Her voice raised.
I started to sob again. "But they don't know about what happened to us, Mommy! They are innocent. They didn't mean it."
She suddenly let go of my hand and looked at me with disbelief. "I can't believe that you're telling that to me. Hindi mo alam ang naging paghihirap namin ng Daddy mo para lang muli kaming makabangon." Her eyes began to water again. "Ano? Sila na ba ngayon ang pinapaboran mo dahil palagi kaming wala ng Daddy mo sa tabi mo?" she said with resentment, until she started to cry again. "Gusto ko mang magalit ngayon dahil ginawa mong panloloko sa amin ng Daddy mo, hindi ko magawa. Dahil alam ko sa sarili ko . . . I've never become a mother to you all the time. Wala akong karapatang magalit, kasi maging pagpapalaki sayo hindi ko nagampanan bilang ina." Her voice shivered. I could sense the pain and regrets in it. "Alam mo ba kung kanino ako nagagalit? Sa sarili ko. Galit na galit ako sa sarili ko dahil wala akong nai-ambag sa buhay mo kundi pera! Dahil gusto kong magkaroon ka ng maganda at marangyang buhay. Oo, nabibigay ko ang lahat ng luho at pangangailangan mo, pero hindi ko nagbigay yung gabay at aruga na huhubog sa pagkatao mo." She paused for a moment, just staring at me with pity. "And here, this is you," she said with hand gesture. "You got sick. You got pregnant at the wrong time." She swallowed, trying to pull back her tears. "T-this is not the life that I dreamt for you." This time she whimpered.
I just lowered my gaze because I couldn't stand seeing my mom hurting and blaming herself because of my negligence and selfishness. I didn't care about what my parents would feel. But Mom was wrong. It wasn't true that she hadn't done her role as a mother to me all the time. Although they were away from me, I could still feel their support and love by letting me pursue everything I wanted without complaining. It was me who didn't become a good daughter to them. It was all my fault.
"I'm sorry," I whispered while silently crying.
"If you love that guy more than us, we understand. But, you may now start forgetting about us as your parents," she said. Napaangat ako nang tingin sa kanya nang magsimula siyang maglakad palayo.
Napailing ako at tinawag siya, "My . . ." pero hindi siya huminto. "What do you want me to do?" I asked. This time, she stopped.
"I want you to forget about the father of your child. We can raise the child without their help."
***
My situation was like jumping on a dark, deep hole that you don't know what is the very end of it. I just chose my love ones over the man I loved. Pumayag ako sa gusto ni Mommy, dahil gusto kong bumawi sa kanila ni Daddy. Sila ang kasa-kasama ko ngayon sa gitna ng sakit na dinaranas ko physically at mentally, kaya sila ang mas nararapat na bigyan ko ng pabor lalo na't kapamilya ko sila. Ngunit hindi maikakaila ang pag-aalala na nararamdam ko sa bawat araw na lumilipas. Natatakot ako na baka hindi ko kayanin, hindi namin kayanin. Ang sabi ko noon sa sarili ko, si Dylan ang gusto kong makasama hanggang pinakahuling araw ko rito sa mundo. Pero paano na ngayong tila napakalabo nang magkatagpo kami muli?
Habang tumatagal, mas lalo kong nararamdaman ang paglala ng kalagayan ko. Everyday I felt like a dry flower. I was even losing my weight. I had chills and joint pains that made me feel like I wanted to stay in my bed all day.
Now, I was lying in bed and just staring at the open window while gently rubbing my tummy. The sky was somber. It was raining and I could hear the sound of the rain sheeting down on the roof. That was all I could hear because I was alone in my room.
I was wondering where Dylan was now and what he was doing while I was not with him. Was he crying? Was he missing me? Was he thinking of me?
"Dylan, how are you now?" I whispered. I felt the hot liquids started to form on the corners of my eyes. "We're having a baby." My voice cracked as my tears began to well sidewards. "I am in pain right now, but I'll be strong, because I have promised you that I will come back. Please, wait for me . . ."
***
This chapter is dedicated to erikachan123 Thank you so much for supporting this story!