Soon it was Christmas Eve, and both Tate and Megan had the excitement of kids. There was an underlying sense of sadness throughout the whole day as they both thought of who they were missing, but they made the best of what they had. Megan prepared a big meal for them while Tate did chores and after they ate, they moved to the living room. There weren't many gifts under the tree, but there were a few and Megan smiled as Tate looked around with gleaming eyes.
"I haven't had Christmas for almost three years." He said softly and unexpectedly tears formed in Megan's eyes. She hadn't thought of what he had done while he drifted around and she hurt to think of him all alone. She reached up to him for a hug, and he bent down and let her hug him. She then moved herself to the couch, and lifted herself onto it.
"Well I hope this one makes up for that then." She whispered and he smiled down at her.
"It will because you are here." Butterflies started in her stomach and she smiled back at him.
"Before we get too carried away with the mushy stuff, let's open presents!" She pointed a finger towards the tree and he laughed and obeyed her, scooping up what little gifts there were and depositing them beside her on the couch. He picked out the ones that were his and then motioned to her.
"You first Megs." She blushed an nodded a little. There was a small sense of loss over the fact that they weren't reading the Christmas story, but she didn't want to bring up religion tonight, especially because she knew it was sort of a sore subject for Tate. She wanted this night to be perfect. The first gift she opened were some new baking things. She remembered mentioning to Tate that she wanted some more things, as she loved baking. She dug through the bag that contained some new pans, frosting bags, measuring spoons and cups, and a couple more things.
"Thanks Tate!" She smiled at him and he grinned back.
"I have to admit those are partly for me too. I sure love your baking Megs." She laughed and then noticed he seemed a little anxious as she reached for her second and last gift. It was a small square box wrapped neatly in paper and her breath caught as she thought of what could be in there. Slowly she unwrapped it. A velvet jewelry box lay underneath, and Megan held her breath as she slowly opened it. Nestled inside was a tiny, delicate, gold heart necklace with a diamond pendent beside it. Her breath caught in delight as she slowly lifted it from where it lay.
"Oh Tate. It's beautiful." She breathed. He shifted beside her and swallowed hard. He moved closer towards her and turned her a little to face to face him. He cupped his hands around hers, being careful not to knock the necklace out of it.
"Megan. I know I'm not the best guy around by any means but... but.." He looked down and brushed his rough thumb gently along the side of her hand. "I've come to care a lot about you Megan and I hope you feel the same way about me. You calm the demons inside of me more than you know. Will you officially be my girlfriend?" Tears were trickling steadily down Megan's face.
"Of course I will Tate. I care about you more than you know." His smile lit up his whole face and he leaned forward and softly kissed her lips.
"I'll always be here Megs." He whispered in her ear and then slowly took the necklace from her hands. It looked even more tiny and delicate in his big, rough hands and the gentle way he handled it melted her heart. He gently turned her around and then brushed her hair out of the way, fastening the necklace around her neck. Once he was done, he laid a soft kiss on the nape of her neck and then turned her around again. They gazed at each other for a moment before she gestured to his gifts.
"Now you open yours!" He laughed and picked up the first of his gifts. He opened a high quality jackknife and grinned at her.
"How did you know I lost my other one?" He smiled and she just shook her head.
"I heard you complaining about it." He laughed but she motioned towards the other gift, and shifted anxiously as he opened it. Slowly he pulled out two slips of paper.
"Megan what.." He trailed off as he flipped them over and read them. She watched his expression closely, hoping he wouldn't be mad.
"I know you want to go back to Texas so I bought two tickets to the San Antonio rodeo in February. We don't have to go back to your home. I just wanted you to be able to go back there again and see something you love and remember that Texas isn't all bad and that you love it there and..." He cut her off by drawing her closer and kissing her hard. When they drew back she noticed moisture glistening in his eyes.
"I love it Megan. And I can't wait to go back. Especially if it's with you." Megan smiled and nodded and they both fell back on the couch in each others arms. For the rest of the evening, the cuddled on the couch, made plans for the trip to Texas, and sipped on hot chocolate and ate Christmas goodies. It had fallen silent now and Megan was laying in Tate's arms with a blanket wrapped around them. He was warm and smelled good, and as she watched the tree lights twinkle, she thought of just how lucky she was to finally call this man her boyfriend.
*****
Megan woke up alone the next morning, despite going to sleep with Tate the night before. She sighed a little, before hauling herself out of bed and quickly pulling on some joggers and a hoodie. She got herself into her chair and then wheeled out to the kitchen to find coffee freshly brewed and Tate making breakfast. He turned when he heard her and grinned.
"Merry Christmas darlin." He walked towards her and leaned in for a small kiss and she smiled against his lips.
"Merry Christmas Tate." They both pulled away and beamed at each other before he went back to cooking pancakes and bacon. After they had finished their breakfast, Tate pushed back his chair and beamed at Megan.
"I have another surprise for you. It's out in the barn."
"Oh no." Megan giggled at the excited look on his face and followed him out the door. He quickly helped her pull her coat on and then grabbed his, before taking the handles of her wheelchair and pushing her towards the barn. Once they got inside, Megan gasped at the sight of her horse Diesel standing there saddled. He wasn't just saddled though. The saddle was her old saddle and it looked to have some sort of straps around the stirrups and the seat.
"I came out to do chores early this morning and I saw that the corral looked pretty clear of snow. I remembered you seeming disappointed that you hadn't been able to ride again after your accident. I thought I'd try do something about that." Tate leaned in and whispered in her ear and Megan covered her mouth in shock. Tears pooled in her eyes and she wheeled herself forward to pat Diesel.
"Hey pretty boy." She cooed at him before turning to look at Tate. "Tate, I love the idea but... I just don't know if I can." She watched as his face fell a little before he caught himself.
"Of course you can Megs. You can do anything. Your uncle even took you hunting after your accident." He came over to her and bent in front of her wheelchair, taking her hands in his.
"I know Tate. But it will mean everything is different." She looked down at their hands as her tears started falling heavily.
"What do you mean Megs?" He tilted her head back up and wiped the tears with his thumb.
"I loved riding before my accident. It was my way to escape. After my accident, not only have I been nervous to ride again, but I know as soon as I get up there it will hit me just how much my life has changed. My escape will be gone. I don't want to come to terms with that." She bowed her head again but could feel Tate's eyes on her.
"Megan. It's been 4 years." Tate said softly and she nodded. She knew what he was saying. She should already have come to terms with what happened to her. "I'm not going to force you into it, but I really think you should do this Megan. I think it would do you good." She nodded again and they sat there in silence for a couple minutes.
"I'll do it." She clenched her teeth in determination and Tate leaned forward and hugged her.
"That's my girl." She smiled against his chest and then straightened up.
"Okay let's do this." Tate lifted her from her chair and hoisted her unto Diesel. She clung to the saddle horn, trying to keep her balance and not slide off the other side.
"Got it?" Tate asked looking up at her and she shook her head.
"Tate I'm going to fall!" He moved quickly, reaching up to grab the straps that were built into her saddle and tying them securely around her waist. She noticed briefly that he must have altered her saddle like this for her. He then did the straps around her legs.
"How does it feel now?" Tate asked looking up at her and she slowly took her hands off the pommel. She still felt off balance but now, didn't feel as if she was going to slide off the horse.
"Better."
"Try straighten your core. That might make it easier." She hadn't realized until now that she had been slouching forwards in the saddle. She used all her strength to push herself up straight, grabbing the pommel again to balance herself.
"Like this?" She looked down at Tate and found him beaming up at her.
"Perfect. Now are you ready to walk? I'm going to lead him outside to the corral okay?" She nodded and tightened her hold on the pommel, clenching her teeth against the fear that wanted to overtake her. Slowly Tate started Diesel forward, guiding him towards to corral. She felt herself starting to lean to the side, despite the straps.
"Tate stop! I'm slipping!" Panic overtook her and Tate stopped instantly, coming to her side. He helped to right her again and then stood there thinking. Suddenly he handed her the rains over Diesels's head and before she could protest, swung easily up behind her. He positioned himself behind the saddle and then looped his arms around her, letting her lean into him and taking the reins.
"This way you have more support." He explained and gently urged the horse ahead. Diesel started slowly walking around the yard and Megan felt her face break out into a huge grin. It felt different than it had before, and she couldn't exactly feel the horse under her, but could sense the sensation. From her perch high up above the ground she felt like she was finally back where she belonged. They walked around the yard for about 20 minutes before Tate guided them back to the barn and swung down. After helping Megan down, he held her in his arms and looked at her face.
"How was that?" He asked grinning and she squealed and threw her arms around his neck.
"It was so, so amazing Tate! I seriously can't thank you enough!" Her grin hadn't faded and happy tears threatened to spill from her eyes.
"I'm glad. All I want to do is make you happy." Tate whispered before kissing her gently. Together they unsaddled and brushed down Diesel, Megan chattering the whole time about the ride. As they headed back into the house she laughed.
"I really thought I had more core strength then that. I sit in my wheelchair easier than most others." Tate chuckled.
"It will come with time Megan. The next few times I'll ride with you again, but soon you'll be trotting around all by yourself." The thought of it made Megan beam with happiness. It had turned out to be a better Christmas than she could have ever hoped for.