Sometimes, we all get overwhelmed with negative emotions, such as sadness, pain, anger, guilt, embarrassment ... and we feel really sad. These emotions can be very toxic for your mental health, especially if you're a sensitive I emotional person.
We can feel these emotions due to many different things, it could be small or big details. Of course, we can not control these situations but we can control our reaction to them.
So here are a few steps to get ride of those negative emotions and find peace and positivism again :
1) Frame your issue :
Most of the time, when we have a small issue, we start thinking of it like a big problem, and we put it in an ugly and dramatic frame. Instead, try to see the positive aspects of this issue, and replace this frame, with a beautiful frame, to imagine your issue differently.
2) Build a foundation :
This is kind of the part 2 of the first step. You're going to tell me : well , how about the real big problems , it's not that easy !
It's still the same concept . Instead of seeing what is happening right now , step back and look at the situation from another angle, imagining all of the positive aspects coming after it .
For example :
- You were fired from your job and you're feeling anxious ?
Now you can find another job , a better job in a better place and a job that you prefer ! During the time searching for a new job , all the work you will do ( researching ,aplying , learning new skills , etc ) is building a foundation for a better job
- You broke up with your boyfriend or lost a friend and you're feeling sad ?
Well , now that they're out of life , you will realize how toxic they were and how they influenced your mood . You'll find other people , other friends , that will be better than the people . You can find better matches for you , and now you know what are the qualities and personalities you're searching for ! You can also do something very important , which is looking into yourself , and loving yourself instead of loving people who are not worth it ! You can start building a foundation for better relationships
- You are ill and you're feeling scared and anxious ?
Well this illness is showing you that something is not functioning right in your body , and that you may need to see a doctor and cure it . It also shows you that you should change your lifestyle and nutrition . This illness is an indicator to help you build a foundation for a better health .
- You failed a test and you're feeling deceived of yourself ?
Well at least now you know what are your strengths and what are your weaknesses , along with what you should study more , focus more on and improve . This helps you build a foundation for a better education and way of studying
Do you get it now ?
3) Label your emotions
Okay , you've re-framed your problem , but you're still feeling some negative emotions . What can you do ?
a. allow yourself to feel your emotions : don't try to deny , hide , or bottle up your emotions . They'll never go this way , and will make you feel even worse when you accumulate them . Let yourself feel your emotions at the moment , so you can get rid of them .
b. accept your emotions : accepting your emotions doesn't mean you are pleased with them , it means you recognize them , and you admit to feel this way . You'll realize that accepting your emotions makes it easier to feel them .
c. label your negative emotions : try to understand which emotion you are feeling exactly , whether it's anger , guilt , frustration , sadness , etc . For example : " Right now , i'm feeling frustrated" , you'll see that it helps you take distance from the situation and detaches you from it .
4) Mindfulness :
Practicing Mindfulness means maintaining a moment-by-moment non-judgmental awareness of our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment, through a gentle, nurturing activity. When we practice mindfulness, our thoughts focus on what we're feeling in the present moment rather than rehashing the past or imagining the future. Mindfulness helps sitting with our emotions instead of reacting to them .
Here are a few ways to practice mindfulness :
a. Breathe in , breathe out ...
Set a timer for 3 minutes , and breathe in and breath out . You don't have to follow a special technique , just breathe in your own rhythm and try blocking your thoughts by focus on your respiration only.
b. visualize putting your emotions on a slowly moving object and watch them move away from you :
visualize putting all of your negative emotions on , or inside an object , and letting them get away from you progressively . For example , imagine putting your emotions inside a balloon , and then releasing it in the air , until if flies far way from you . Or putting all of your negative emotions on a leave , and letting it sail in a river with the water , far away from you .
c. observe your surroundings :
observe your surroundings , everything around you , pay attention to the small details , identify objects , name them , etc , to distract yourself . If you have the chance to , go for a walk or a run .
d. distract yourself and do something creative :
another way to distract yourself while being able to process your emotions at the same time , is creating . you could draw , paint , sing , play an instrument , anything that distracts you and relaxes you a bit !
I hope you find these small tips helpful an inspiring !
keep your head high 👑
~Rasha