11. Supplier
To Beg
The messages had stopped.
It had been a week and finally the messages had stopped.
Alice wanted to laugh at how easy it had been. She should have trusted her gut in the first place. She knew what Finn Cauley was like. She'd momentarily forgotten, hypnotised by his dimpled smile and a kiss she wished never happened, but now she was awake.
She'd never felt so stupid, except maybe when she was fourteen and Finn Cauley had betrayed her for the first time.
And now she was almost eighteen, and she was being humiliated all over again.
She used to be good at learning lessons. It felt like she had made more mistakes this past month than she had in her entire life leading up to this moment.
It all made sense as soon as she'd read his name across the screen.
Why he had suddenly appeared—to torment her. How the messages knew her every move—he had been there himself, at every party, every event. Why he had been blaming her friends—the final nail in the coffin, an attempt to isolate her; to manipulate her, just as he had when they were children.
Alice was done playing his game.
Of course, Cauley tried to speak to her.
The same way he had when they were fourteen and she was fooled for the first time. And same as then, she ignored him, too hurt to even allow a word out. She couldn't even bear to scold him for his uniform like she used to, ignoring him in the hallways. Passing him without a word.
She had bigger things to worry about—like her trials, coming up in less than a month, or her chemistry project with Julia.
And so, she found herself in the library, surrounded by a makeshift study group.
Julia sat beside her, highlighting notes in her textbook that they could use in their presentation. Alice's laptop lay open on the table in front of the pair, the beginnings of a presentation awaiting them.
Emily was on her other side, where Alice was currently helping her memorise quotes from 'Pride and Prejudice' before their English paper. English was always the first exam, and Emily was on the verge of a panic attack at the idea of handwriting three essays in two hours.
Opposite the pair, Heather and Theo sat with a few of his friends, making their way through a business studies practice paper together.
Despite the silence, the room was buzzing with anxious energy. Everyone had trials on their mind, and with less than one month left until the first exam, Alice felt like she was running out of time.
One month felt tiny after all that had happened this term.
She didn't want to think about any of it. She wanted to throw herself into her studies and pretend it never happened. Pretend rumours weren't circling the school for the second time, all because of Finn Cauley.
Worse, she had been so distracted this term—thinking about the rubbish in her locker, thinking every notification on her phone would be a new message—she hadn't focused as much on her studies as usual. It certainly didn't help that half of her notes had been destroyed in the process.
That was another reason, she realised. With Alice out of the way, Finn was one step higher to the top rank in their graduating class. He'd planned it all from the very beginning.
Alice's stomach stirred and she swallowed hard. She counted to three in her head, then turned back to Emily with a grin.
"Alright," she said, attempting to sound cheerful. "Let's try some quotes on the theme of marriage, shall we?"
"Oh, okay, I've got this," Emily muttered, more to herself than to Alice. A second passed. Her lips moved silently, mouthing words as her brow furrowed. She looked towards the ceiling, grimacing. "I swear, I know this... What's the first word?"
Alice looked down at the page. "It."
"Second word?"
"Is."
"It is?"
"Yes."
"Well, that's not a very helpful hint, is it?"
Alice snorted, rolling her eyes. "You asked for the first two words."
"Alright, well, scratch that. Hint, please?"
"It's the most famous quote from the book. About a truth... universally acknowledged..."
Emily wrinkled her nose, thinking for a moment before admitting, "I don't think I read that far."
Alice lifted a brow. "It's literally the first line of the book."
"My point remains." Emily groaned, burying her face into her arms. Her voice came out muffled as she said, "I'm never going to pass trials. I'll get a mystery ATAR and end up on the streets, disowned."
Across the table, Heather scoffed. "Maybe you should have read the book."
Emily looked up from the desk to glare at her, settling her chin on her folded arms. "Heather, how are you not completely freaking out about trials?"
"Well, I did the clever thing and took English Standard," she replied. "Work smarter, not harder. Besides, isn't all this up on SparkNotes, anyway? Why are we even here?"
"Our trials are important if we want to do well," Alice replied simply. "Our school assessments count for half of our HSC mark, remember?"
Heather frowned. "Alright, Miss Prefect, we get it. I just don't think all this is necessary."
Theo glanced at her paper and lifted a brow. "Heather, you realise you've gotten all of the questions wrong so far, don't you?"
Blushing, she muttered an embarrassed, "Well, I wasn't really paying attention."
Alice stifled a laugh, meeting Theo's eye. He threw her a wink before turning back to his own paper. She smiled to herself, feeling her face warm after something so small as a playful wink.
Between trials and Theo's rugby training, they barely had time to see each other anymore outside of study dates and late-night phone calls—and even then, he had been calling her less often than usual.
A part of her wondered if he'd grown bored of her.
Alice never felt that she was very interesting to be around. She was a prude. She was a goodie-two-shoes who obeyed the rules and forced others to as well. She had responsibilities that always had to come first.
And now Theo was growing bored of her.
She stared after him for a moment too long, memorising the way his brown hair fell from his forehead. The way his eyes scanned the page. How his tongue poked out his lips as he hesitated on a question. She tried to convince herself that he'd just been busy, the same as she had been.
"What's he doing here?"
Alice blinked, returning to reality.
Emily had whispered in her ear, tugging on her sleeve, and Alice turned to find her staring wide-eyed at the entrance. She spun, heart pounding, following her gaze to find Finn Cauley standing at the door.
His eyes met hers and she knew he was here for her.
"Travers," he said, voice ripping through the otherwise silent library.
She scowled, turning back to her book, blatantly ignoring him. For a moment, it seemed that it worked, until a minute passed, and he spoke again, undeterred.
"Travers," he repeated, stepping closer.
Alice ignored him, twisting her body away from Finn to completely face Emily.
"It is a truth universally acknowledged," she began to quote from the book, "that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. What does that mean, Emily?"
Emily's gaze flickered between Alice and Finn. Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Umm... That people like to get married?"
Alice smiled weakly. "Not quite."
"Travers."
"It's more about the role of women in Regency England. You see, Elizabeth's mother—"
"TRAVERS!" Cauley's voice ripped through the library and everyone who wasn't already staring turned, eyes wide.
Alice stilled, refusing to turn even then, until Finn's hand came to tug on her shoulder, forcing her to look at him.
"Are you just going to ignore me forever?" he spat.
"That was the plan," Alice replied calmly. She lifted her book. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm studying. With my friends. Really, Cauley, don't you know that you're supposed to be quiet in a library?"
Finn's eyes widened a fraction before narrowing into a sharp glare. "You have to hear me out, Travers."
"I don't have to do anything, actually."
"Listen to me!"
"No!" she shouted, snapping. She paused, feeling eyes on her, and sucked in a deep breath, maintaining her composure. A Travers woman never shouted, especially in a library. She wasn't going to let him make a fool out of her. Not again.
She met his eye, rage bubbling in her veins.
"I asked you," she said slowly. "I asked you that night. I told you. If I found out it was you—"
"It wasn't!" While Alice was forbidden from yelling, Finn certainly wasn't. "It wasn't me, Alice. I don't understand why you won't believe me—"
"Believe you?" she echoed, her voice cracking. She shook her head. "Why should I believe you, Cauley? When have you ever done anything that would cause me to believe you?"
Finn paused. His eyes flickered to the table beside them. Alice's gaze followed, catching the chair her legs had knocked into when he'd kissed her that day. She warmed, tearing her eyes away.
"It was my idea to check the printer," he said simply.
Alice rolled her eyes. "Yes. Of course. You—You do that, and then suggest to check the printer, and you think you have me wrapped around your pinkie. Except you're still Finn, aren't you? And you forgot to log out. And your grand scheme goes to crap. Better luck next time."
"I never forget," Finn sneered.
"Well, could you go not forget somewhere else, please?" Alice replied. She turned back to her book, pretending to scan the page. "I'm preparing for trials over here."
"Travers—"
"Leave, Cauley."
Alice turned to find Theo lowering his paper, his eyes narrowed in a glare towards Finn.
Finn laughed.
"What are you going to do, McKay? Defend her honour?"
"Alice told you to leave," Theo replied easily. "So, why don't you listen to her and disappear?"
"Travers," Finn said, ignoring Theo. Alice looked up, finally. He watched her, his usual smirk replaced by a frown. She had to look away. She couldn't fall for his tricks again.
"Go away, Finn," she said finally. "Seriously."
A tense pause drifted over the group. Alice held her breath, keeping her eyes trained on her paper. She wasn't sure what would happen if she looked up again—if Finn didn't leave. She wasn't sure what Theo would do.
But after a minute, she heard shuffling as Finn stepped away from the table.
"Fine," he said lowly. "I'll go."
She didn't look up until she heard the doors click shut.
And then everyone was on her.
"Oh, my God. I don't think I breathed the entire time he was here," Julie murmured from beside her.
"Finn Cauley is such an arse," Theo added, rolling his eyes and grabbing his paper with more aggression than necessary.
Next to him, Heather shrugged. "I thought it was kind of hot."
Alice glared at her and she shrugged again.
"What?" Heather said. "I'm just speaking the truth."
"What was that all even about?" Emily asked. She shifted in her seat to properly face Alice. "I mean, I know he was the one behind all those posters, but what's his deal? And why haven't you reported him to the Headmaster or something?"
Alice sighed. She ran a hand over her face. As if she wasn't stressed enough over trials, of course Finn Cauley had to storm into the library and make her day even worse.
Theo was right. Finn Cauley was an arse.
"It won't do anything," Alice said finally. "Let's be realistic. Finn Cauley will never be expelled or even suspended from Sierra Grammar. I'm just cursed for him to forever be a thorn in my side. At least, until we graduate. Which is why these trials are so important."
She opened her book again, hoping they could just move back into studying, but Emily was always a gossip.
"I just find it incredible that he has the guts to come here and ask to talk to you after all that he did," Emily said. "Not just with the posters, but also in Year Eight."
Alice pursed her lips. "He's delusional. He always has been."
Sucking in a deep breath, she tightened her grip on her book and looked up, forcing her classic Travers smile onto her lips.
"Well," she said, attempting to force some pep into her voice. "Should we move onto the next quote?"
***
Finn Cauley had never been an easy person to deter, and this year more than most, he seemed to follow Alice around like a bad smell.
When she finished her last class for the day—a fencing lesson that ended at 7pm—she could hardly say she was surprised to see him sitting on her bed, waiting.
Alice paused at the doorway to her room, staring at Finn Cauley, sitting on her bed like he owned it. A book sat cracked on his lap and she realised it was her book from her bedside table. She stormed forward, snatching it out of his hands.
He started, pausing when his eyes fell on her. Then, he sat back, making himself even more comfortable, his hands resting behind his neck as he looked up at her.
"Miss Travers," he said with false astonishment. "What a surprise to see you here! Do you come here often?"
Alice rolled her eyes. "What are you doing here?"
"Reading," he said. He glanced at the book in her hands. "At least, I was, until you interrupted."
"This is my book—" she cut herself off, recognising that mischievous glint in his eyes as he watched her. She released a breath, willing herself to calm down. He'd gotten enough reactions out of her to last a decade. She refused to let him play anymore games with her.
"Who let you in?" she asked instead.
Finn, however, was far from finished.
"Your mother, actually," he replied, grinning. "She's always loved me. Remember when she invited me to visit your family in Hong Kong with you? How different things might be now if I'd been allowed. She called me, after we stopped talking. Did you know?"
Alice's eyebrow twitched. She hadn't known, but she wasn't going to let him win this battle. She kept her face as neutral as possible, but Finn has always been good at reading her.
She wanted to scream at him. He wasn't allowed to do that. He wasn't allowed to know her as well as he did. Not after all that had happened. His smile grew.
"She walked me up to your room herself," he said. "Would you like me to call her for you? It sounds like you have some issues you need to work through together."
Letting out a breath, Alice crossed her arms and frowned.
"Cauley, you need to leave."
"I don't know, I'm really comfortable where I am."
She stared at him. Just stared at him. Her entire body was sore from her fencing class. She hadn't done fencing since she was, what? Nine years old? Her body wasn't used to it and, as if she wasn't tired enough, now she was sore on top of everything else.
She suspected it was part of her parents' plan—to send her off to a fencing class just so she would be sore for the rest of the week. No matter how much they insisted it would improve her composure, all she knew was she was sore and in desperate need of a nap.
Her muscles throbbed. Her head pounded. All she wanted to do was shower and curl up on her bed. Her bed that Finn Cauley was currently lying on.
"Finn," she said weakly, desperation beginning to leak into her voice. She might have felt embarrassed if she wasn't so tired and achy.
Finn looked up at her. His smile had faded, and he pushed up to stand.
"All I ask is for you to listen to me," he said. "Hear me out."
Alice narrowed her eyes but kept silent, letting him continue. She'd realised long ago that Finn Cauley was as stubborn as she was, and she knew arguing wasn't going to get them anywhere.
"It wasn't me," he said when Alice did not speak.
She scoffed.
"No, no, really!" he added quickly before she could turn away. He grabbed her shoulders, forcing her to remain put, and stepped closer, his voice turning serious. "I'm serious, Travers. It wasn't me. We had an agreement, didn't we?"
Alice frowned. Finn, sensing her confusion, took her hand. His fingers curled around hers, forming a fist, as if she were holding a knife, and pulled it to his chest.
"If it's me," he started slowly, "you get to murder me."
Alice snorted. "It was a big joke, Cauley. I was hysterical. It wasn't real."
"It was to me," he replied, his voice deadly serious. "We agreed. If you found out, after all this, that it was me behind it, you get to murder me. I swore it."
Alice lifted a brow. She considered him for a moment. She hadn't actually meant it when she'd said it. Alice was always good at exaggerating when her emotions were on the line. Except now, listening to Finn, seeing that grave expression on his face, she started to wonder if he had taken it seriously himself.
Shrugging, she said, "I'll go sharpen my knife, then."
"And you have my full permission," he said immediately. His fingers tightened around her fist, pressing it tighter to his chest. "I told you that, right?"
"Yes..."
"You have my full permission," he repeated. "Except, I didn't do it. It wasn't me. You know me, Alice. I'm not a liar."
He watched her. Waited. Waited for her to reply. And she stared back. He seemed so serious. He seemed to believe his own words.
For a moment, she was taken back to Finn Cauley, eight years old on the playground, with blood leaking from his nose. The serious tone in his voice as he muttered, "Won't happen again." The deathly look on his face. He'd seemed decades older at that time, and Alice wondered if they'd ever really been children.
She was taken back to Finn Cauley, one month ago. Finn Cauley, sitting in the driver's seat his car. Taking her over hills and through trees. Almost kissing her. And then in the library, when he really did.
He'd seemed honest at that time, hadn't he?
Anger flamed in Alice's chest once more. He'd had this all planned. Every move, looking back. Every action. It was all for Alice to trust him. For her to believe him.
Maybe Finn wasn't a liar, but he'd always had a mask. He'd always been good at slipping it on when required.
Alice had fallen for that one time too many. She wasn't going to play this game.
"I don't believe you," Alice muttered.
Finn's eyes flickered between hers. He released a breath that fanned over her face. Mint.
"I know," he said finally. "But you will."
He squeezed her fist one last time before letting her go and leaving.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
Thank you so much for reading, voting and commenting! This story has almost 2k reads! That's amazing! It really means a lot to me <3