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{sydney.cross) 🌻
lovelysyd- gorgeous
kathrine.scott- i love you :)
selenagomez- we need to catch up ❤️
onedirectionfan- your actually breathtaking
hater- bitch
fanaccount- damn 🔥
gigihadid- love your music, hope to meet you one day x
25,672 more comments...
What the hell is wrong with me? Do I really not have any self control! For fucks sakes, this is probably the best and worse thing to ever happen to me.
I kept replaying the day with Harry. We were together, kissing. It was more than kissing for me though. It was comfort. It made me all giddy and girly inside. My heart was beating so fast and I swear I stopped breathing for a minute.
I knew deep down in my heart that this was wrong in some sort of way. Either it be that he was technically my boss and he could fire me at any minute, or that he was obviously still going through a heartbreak. It was all just so confusing.
I also could not get the look he gave me after we had finished our intimate moment. As we were catching our breath, Harry just started at me with a look of lust. I could not really tell exactly what he wanted though. Was he lusting for my heart or my body? or both?
I hated having all of these confusing thoughts, but I could not help myself from overthinking. I have been in these types of incidents before. I have always be known for falling too hard and disregarding any red flags. I was not going to make that mistake this time, not only was my job on the line, but so was my heart.
I have finally accepted the fact that I liked Harry. This was not a crush anymore, I really liked him. I was crazy to not. He was amusing, kind, charming, a gentlemen, absolutely breathtaking, and that is only a few words to describe him.
Even though all I wanted to do was run to him and tell him how I feel, I can't. I have to guard my heart on this one.
Ever since I was a little girl I have wanted to be a singer. My mom always supported me and when she died is when I made a mission for myself to do everything for her. To reach my accomplishments, for her. To show her how proud she can be of me. Everything I did was for her and I did not need someone to distract me.
I did not know how I was going to ignore Harry though. Not only did I work with him but I could not deny the pull I had towards him, but I needed to.
It would be easier anyway to try and forget these feelings now before they got too intense and it was too late. I did not need a heartbreak, cause I knew that if something happened with Harry it would end up the same in the end.
I would be heartbroken.
Sydneys Instagram Story:
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"I've got to move on and be who I am
I just don't belong here
I hope you understand
We might find a place in this world someday
But at least for now
I gotta go my own way."
Haha this chapter just gave me "Gotta go my own way" High School Musical vibes. Sorry this was a short chapter, but I needed a filler chapter just to show you where Sydneys mind and thoughts are at.
If you enjoyed this chapter give it a vote and comment if you wanna! Have a great day or night and like I say every chapter, TREAT PEOPLE WITH KINDNESS!
Lots of love,
-Lexie xx