I smiled as the man in front of me tried to decide on what kind of muffin he wanted, it wasn't that big of a deal; we only had three different flavours left.
"Coconut."
Bad choice.
"Sure thing, and that's to go?" I asked, just to clarify as he nodded and I added an extra twenty pence onto his order for the to go charge. "Six thirty please."
I smiled as he handed me a ten pound note just as I caught Meredith, the manager and Tara the owners, younger sister, heading back towards me with a bowl full of dirty dishes for the dishwasher.
"Still on?" She asked pointing at the said appliance and I nodded as I carefully counted his change out and let him know it shouldn't be too long.
"Last run?" I asked, as I started on the drink, this was like riding a bike I had found out.
Until I'd started back here almost two weeks ago now, I hadn't used a proper café/barista style coffee machine in months, arguably, almost a year.
But Tara had believed in me and waved me back without hesitation, although that might have partly been because all her part time Christmas hires had gone back to uni.
Apparently I was the only one psychotic enough to juggle a university degree and a job!
"Yeah." Meredith agreed in a hum, "Once you're done there you can head off."
I smiled at her just as I fitted the lid on perfectly and grabbed the bag containing the frankly, disgusting, coconut muffin and took it over to the man just as he loosened his tie.
"Have a nice night." I smiled politely, a nod of his head was all the response I got but I shook it off as I made one last sweeping check of the café before I headed out to the stockroom.
It hadn't changed and funnily enough I was pretty happy about that, the stockroom was a mess, but it was a mess where everyone could find whatever they were looking for without too much stress and it doubled as the changing room.
Not that I ever found the need to change considering the uniform here was hardly a uniform, as long it was black then it didn't matter if it was a skirt and a blouse or a dress or jeans and a tshirt, Tara was laid back.
But also because I had the evidence of Harry's mouth and hands everywhere.
And I couldn't risk someone seeing all the bruising, they might get the wrong idea. Whereas I loved it.
Tara always had been laid back and I'm glad I made the effort to stay in contact with her once my Mum died, I knew she missed Lisa just as much as I missed my Mum. And I knew Marble Arch Panini held a special place in Mum's heart too.
Just like when I'd worked at Primrose Bakery, for exactly one summer, turns out I'm much better at coffees than pastries, I felt like I was closer to her and holding a piece of her in my heart every time I went to work.
"Sorry we're closed!"
I stuck my head out the door just as I heard Meredith call out and my frown instantly disappeared as I spotted a tall brunette man waiting awkwardly.
"He's with me." I spoke up as I pulled the stockroom door shut behind me, aware of Harry relaxing as he spotted me.
"Sorry should have said. Meredith this is Harry, Harry this is Meredith my manager."
"Nice to meet you Harry, been wondering when you'd be in. Would you like anything to go?" Meredith chatted away pleasantly, where Tara was lovely to the people she knew, Meredith was an all round people person.
"No s'all good thank you." Harry declined politely, more politely than I'd ever seen actually and I smiled as I clocked out on the till before Meredith brought me into a warm hug and I rubbed her back slightly.
"See you Sunday Poppy." Meredith smiled and I nodded, "Don't be a stranger Harry, welcome here anytime!"
Harry simply nodded at Meredith as he held his hand out for me and I quickly beelined to him, almost so quickly that it may have been a skip and linked my fingers through his as I braced myself for stepping out into the cold.
"I swear to god London's always colder at the start of the year compared to the end." I mumbled miserably as Harry steered us across the street to his car and I was thankful for the heated seats that would soon be meeting my body.
"Did you know that out of November, December, January and February, November is on average the hottest month?"
I blinked as I stared at the side of Harry's face, the information that just left his mouth was...unusual.
"No..." I said slowly, "I did not know that, how did you know that?"
I stared at Harry's head as he drove until we hit a red light, a string of curses falling from his lips and his eyes finally met mine and a half hearted shrug was thrown my way.
"I read a lot of Wikipedia articles."
"I am so in love with you." I laughed, my voice and laugh high pitched and breathy and I swore the tips of Harry's ear tinted pink as he rolled this eyes.
I lent over the centre console to press our lips together just as the light turned green and I reluctantly pulled away only to have Harry grip the back of my head to hold me to him and I smiled as I pecked his lips one last time before pulling away properly.
"So how was your day? What'cha do?" I asked pleasantly as Harry squeezed my knee, another shrug being thrown my way.
"Boring. Nothing really, couple of deals but it's nothing that makes money." Harry shrugged and I chewed my lip.
My eyes ran over his face as I looked at him, in the dim light of the car I could see the bags building up under his eyes and I frowned.
I knew he wasn't sleeping properly, despite the fact since he moved out we'd spent almost every evening together.
His default answer for that question was always "boring", it had been since he moved out and back to his own flat on the second of January.
I told him it didn't need to be done right away but Harry had come back with some dig about needing to be able to leave an empty mug on the side and it not to be washed and put away in a blink of an eye.
Sorry for not leaving stacks of dirty mugs in the sink, H.
"What does make money?" I asked curiously, Harry had never really talked about his job but then again, I wasn't really sure what there was to talk about when you sold people drugs.
But then again I didn't really know anything about drugs.
"White people drugs." Harry snorted and my brows furrowed, "Coke, Molly, Acid, you know party drugs."
"I see." I nodded as I listened to him explain, "So what doesn't make money?"
"Weed." Harry stated and I frowned, but that is like the most used drug in England....that doesn't really make any sense.
"Why are you so interested?" Harry eyed me suspiciously and I shrugged.
"I was just curious, I don't really know anything about drugs. I've never done any."
"Not even smoked a bit of pot when you were sixteen?" Harry asked, a smirk on his face and I shook my head.
"I feel like you know me well enough by now." I clicked my tongue at him, "Max used to smoke a lot when he was a teenager, I'm not sure if he still does now. And besides you wouldn't even get me codeine for Halloween!"
Harry rolled his eyes at me as he stopped the car to key in the gate code and I undid my seatbelt easily and pushed the door open, jumping as a hand grabbed my arm.
"Where yeh' going?" Harry asked, a somewhat panicked look on his face.
"To check the post..." I smiled at him, watching as realisation dawned on his face and he nodded, letting go of my arm. "You can go on in, I won't be a moment."
I knew Harry hesitated for a few minutes before he did as I suggested as I pulled everything out of the mailbox, I hated having a gated driveway, I wish we could just have a normal letter box like other people.
I rolled my eyes as I pulled out a handful of junk mail, a letter from my bank which looked like my bank statement and I sucked my teeth, I was pretty sure I opted out of these.
I shook off my annoyance as I grabbed the last two envelopes, both of which were rather large and brown, although one was substantially thicker than the other. Both were addressed to me as I shut the mailbox and peered at the envelopes as I walked.
My throat tightened as my eyes caught the logo of my both my university Kings College and the Columbia logo.
This was it. This was either my acceptance or rejection letter.
I stared at the envelope stupidly for a few minutes before I heard a cough and I looked up to see Harry standing in the doorway looking at me pointedly and I flushed, stuffing the post into my bag as I hurried up to him.
"Sorry." I mumbled as I passed him, Harry shutting to door behind me as I pulled off my jacket, which I'd given up thinking of as Harry's, I wore it all the time, in fact it had become my go to jacket so therefore, it was mine.
"Flower." Harry grunted and I flushed again, the look on his face almost enough to make me apologise for apologising in the first place.
Harry followed me upstairs and to my room without another word, although his grabby hands did most of the talking considering he made it very hard for me to walk when he was constantly grabbing my bum.
"What do you want for dinner?" Harry asked as he launched himself onto my bed as I rummaged for a jumper and a pair of leggings to change into.
"Are you staying here?" I asked quietly, watching him in my mirror, for some reason my heart was aching in this moment.
It was like I was aware that this was going to be a memory one day, the sight of Harry laying in my bed looking absolutely angelic even though he could be a demon a lot of the time, and I knew that I was going to hold onto this picture in my brain, forever.
"Where else am I gunna be?"
"I dunno, your flat." I pointed out.
"But you're not there." Harry stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and I closed my eyes as I pulled on a jumper that I'm pretty sure was actually Harry's beforehand.
"H..."
"Wha' Flower?" Harry asked without opening his eyes and I gently took a seat on the edge of the bed, his eyes opening as the bed moved. "Have I ever told you how good yeh' look in my clothes?"
"Yes." I replied before licking my lips. "You 'moved out' two weeks ago and yet you've stayed here almost every night since then..."
"So?"
I heard the bite in Harry's voice as he looked at me and I saw his eyes grow hard in a split second and I sighed as I looked away from him, my eyes landing on my window seat.
I hadn't sat on it since the night Harry and I hid from my Father.
"Why don't I get to stay at your flat?"
"Why would you want to? It's a shit hole compared to this place."
I frowned as I chewed my lip, my eyes firmly pointed away from Harry although I could see him staring at me in my peripheral vision.
"That's not the point Harry, I just think it's unfair. Why wouldn't you want to sleep in your own bed, in your flat where all your stuff is, you know? You don't always have to stay with me here. I can come to yours too."
Harry was stoic as I finally looked down at him, his eyes flicking across my face every so often as my words hung in the air, I mean really, it wasn't that much of a big deal but I did feel bad. His whole life had been turned upside down because of me and he didn't even live in his flat for like five months because he had to be here.
I would have gone stir crazy by now.
"I really don't care where I sleep Flower, as long as you're there."
I blinked at Harry, my cheeks heating as I smiled at him before I lent down to press my lips to his. One of Harry's hands tangled in the back of my hair as he kissed me back and in a blink of an eye I was on my back underneath him.
"I know you're not sleeping very well."
I rested my head against the pillow behind me as Harry held himself up over me, my fingertips running under his eyes gently, and my heart thudded in my chest as Harry's eyes fluttered closed and I sighed.
"M'fine Flower." Harry muttered before he opened his eyes and pushed off my bed and I sat up watching him with my lower lip under my teeth. "C'mon then."
"I have work on Sunday so I can only stay tonight." I said quietly and I grabbed a bag and stuffed come clothes into it.
"I'll just take you to work on Sunday morning."
"I have to be there at eight." I raised an eyebrow at him, watching as he shrugged.
"M'not the one who has trouble getting up in the mornings."
Harry smirked as he took my bag from my hand and slung it over his shoulder as I glared at him, absentmindedly grabbing my handbag as I followed him out.
"What was all your post?" Harry asked just as he pulled roughly into the curb outside the record store and I blinked at him, I'd been trying to put it out of my mind.
The brown envelope felt like it weighed a tonne in my bag.
"Mostly junk." I hummed as I followed Harry up the stairs towards his front door, his long arm flicking the light on the minute he pushed the door open and gestured for me to go on it.
My eyes immediately landed on the sink and I pursed my lips as I saw several dirty mugs in the sink but didn't say anything, mainly because Harry had already disappeared down the hallway and was slinging my bag into his room.
I dropped my handbag behind the sofa and tugged off my boots and jacket before I headed over to his fridge and pulled it open, my eyes accessing the situation.
I was starting to think we should have stayed at mine, at least I knew I had food.
I chewed my lip as I looked through a couple of cupboards, he had pasta, one single jar of tomato sauce, a seriously random mix of vegetables in the fridge, a box of eggs and a half a packet of bacon.
The fuck was Harry eating when he was here alone?
I thought about it for a minute, it didn't help that my possible rejection letter was bouncing about in the back of my head. I guess we could have omelettes.
But they were breakfast food.
I jumped as sudden sound filled the small flat and I glanced over my shoulder to find Harry at his record player as the beginning of Mr Blue Sky by Electric Light Orchestra met my ears and I smiled.
"You don't have a lot of food." I admitted as Harry headed towards me and I chewed my lip, "We can have omelettes?"
"Yeh' alright." Harry shrugged as he trailed one long finger down my cheek and I blinked up at him, "You're so pretty Flower."
I flushed as Harry complimented me, a lopsided smile appearing on his lips and I ducked my head, what had brought that on?
"M'going to have a shower I won't be long." Harry said and I nodded, pecking his lips before he stepped away and I got busy with pulling out a slightly discoloured frying pan.
"Don't you realise the things we did were all for real? Not a dream." I sang along to the record quietly, my hips swaying as I watched the eggs cook into the desired constituency.
"I just can't believe they've all faded out of view." I sang quietly, jumping as hands grabbed my hips and I spun to find Harry behind me.
"Don't sneak up on me like that." I muttered, taking notice of his wet hair.
"Were you dancing in my kitchen?"
"No." I mumbled, cheeks heating as I kept my eyes away from him.
Harry's hand nudged my chin up and I glanced at him to find a smile on his lips before he pressed his lips to mine and I automatically wrapped one arm around his neck. Our lips slotting perfectly into each others as I lent up to get a better taste.
"Your dinner is gunna burn." I mumbled as Harry pulled me flushed against his body and I opened my eyes to see his still closed.
"Don't care." Harry mumbled back, his lips trailing along my jaw bone and I sighed in happiness. "Stop covering them up."
"Covering what?"
"My bruises." Harry said as his teeth nibbled on my neck and I gasped.
"H-have to." I managed to stutter out before I pushed against his chest, Harry's lips twitching against my skin before he pressed one last wet kiss to it before he pulled away.
I managed to serve our dinner without anymore interruptions although he tried, considering his hands were never too far from my body and as much as I loved Harry, which was a lot, and loved him touching me, also a lot, he was quite a nuisance.
"You're very quiet."
I blinked and focused in on Harry sat alongside me on the sofa, some pointless reality TV show playing absentmindedly in the background and I shrugged, eyes drifting to my half eaten dinner.
"Wha's wrong?" Harry tried and I shook my head.
"Nothing." I lied, although it wasn't really a lie. It wasn't anything dramatic, I just knew I needed to open the letter.
"Don't fuckin' lie to me Flower."
I swallowed as I put my plate on his coffee table and looked at Harry as I pulled my legs up underneath me and sighed.
"Got a letter from uni today."
"And?"
"It's either my acceptance or rejection from Columbia." I explained watching as Harry's tongue sucked his teeth before his eyes rolled to the ceiling.
"You've not opened it?" He asked, a few minutes later, a strange roughness to his voice and I shook my head.
"No. I know I have to but I'm not sure I want too, I don't even know why I don't want to know. I'm just having a lot of feelings about it."
"I'll open it."
I blinked as I looked at Harry, his face stoic and I swallowed before nodding my head towards the my bag and I watched silently as he stood and easily grabbed the envelope from my bag, which in hindsight was too big to be concealed.
I chewed my lip as Harry's eyes flicked over the address, his face giving nothing away before he flipped it over and ripped open the seal.
It was one single white piece of paper he pulled out, the two logos along the top again and I could see my name and address as well as the admissions office address for Columbia.
I waited with bated breath as Harry's eyes moved down the page, his face still and I briefly wondered if he knew his face never gave anything away and I almost wished I was like that. I was an open book.
"You're going to Columbia, Flower."
All the air left my body and I felt like I deflated as Harry spoke, his voice different, almost like it was detached from his body and I frowned.
I watched as he handed me the letter and I took a hold of it in shaky fingers, his eyes never looking at me.
Harry instead busied himself with taking our plates and cutlery to the kitchen and I heard the clatter of him dropping them into the sink.
"I'm going to Columbia." I said once I'd read the letter for myself.
"H, I'm going to Columbia." I repeated louder as I stood, my eyes wide as I looked at Harry who was leaning against the counter watching me.
"M'proud of you Flower."
I squealed as I clutched the letter to my chest before I beelined towards him, throwing myself at his chest and Harry's arms came up immediately to link loosely around me, his lips twitching at the corners ever so slightly but a smile never came.
"Oh god," I pulled back from Harry's lips, his eyebrow raising. "I have so much to do!"
"Can't it wait?"
I blinked, Harry shocking me out of my self induced panic spiral, I really did have a lot to do, accommodation, course books, packing, flights.
"Y-yeah, I guess." I stumbled over my words, Harry's eyes hard as he nodded.
"M'going to bed."
"Huh?" I asked stupidly, pouting as he untangled himself from me and stepped sideways, had I upset him?
"Is everything okay?" I asked quietly, as Harry started to walk away from me, a nod being thrown in my direction and I swallowed.
The echo of his bedroom door shutting died out pretty quickly and I was left standing in the middle of his kitchen, clutching my acceptance letter to my chest as I tried not to cry.
At least he was proud of me?
I shook my head as I dropped the letter into my bag and pulled off the jumper I was wearing, leaving it on the sofa and headed for Harry's bedroom.
I knew he wasn't going to be asleep and I knew what would cheer him up.
I pushed the door open to find Harry sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands and I almost abandoned my plans as my heart stuttered.
"H?"
Harry's head lifted the minute I spoke, his eyes darting from my face to my bra in a few seconds before he looked back at my face and that threw me off for a minute.
"Wanna talk about it?"
That wasn't my plan but considering he didn't automatically jump at the fact I was just in my bra and leggings I knew something was wrong, almost every waking minute of the day his hands were on my boobs.
"Nothing to talk about Flower." Harry shook his head and I bit my lip.
"Wanna not talk and make me scream instead?"