Mom, I'm Bulletproof

By MacFrenzy

2.6K 345 161

A comedic/dramatic/romantic superhero epic. Amy McBloom struggles to pay her bills, bickers on the phone wit... More

Chapter 1: All Together
Chapter 2.1: Can't Talk Right Now
Chapter 2.2: Action Figure
Chapter 2.3: Amy vs. Hate
Chapter 3.1: Science Experiment
Chapter 3.2: Secret Identity
Chapter 3.3: School of the Future
Chapter 3.4: Mind Over Matter
Chapter 3.5: A Flash of Light
Chapter 4.1: Under the Arch
Chapter 4.2: One Night in Theater City
Chapter 4.3: Almost Forgotten
Chapter 5.1: Future Girl's History
Chapter 5.2: Nerd Heaven
Chapter 5.3: Totally Getting an A
Chapter 5.4: Confusion and Anger
Chapter 5.5: Beeswax
Chapter 5.6: One of These Days
Chapter 5.7: No Ordinary Robbery
Chapter 5.8: Three More Shots
Chapter 5.9: History's Future
Chapter 5.10: On Another Level
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 1
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 2
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 3
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 4
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 5
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 6
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 7
Chapter 6: Murder in London, part 8
Chapter 7.1: Making Ends Meet
Chapter 7.2: The Fine Print
Chapter 7.3: Under Fire
Chapter 7.4: Fly
Chapter 7.5: Still Got Some Fight
Chapter 7.6: Safe Houses
Chapter 7.7: The Real Deal
Chapter 8.1: Back to School
Chapter 8.2: When Girl Heroes Collide
Chapter 8.3: Trouble
Chapter 8.4: You're The Smart One
Chapter 8.5: Amy Gets Schooled
Chapter 8.6: A Life of My Own
Chapter 9.1: Not Easy to Find
Chapter 9.2: A Question of Trust
Chapter 9.3: The Old Pit
Chapter 10.1: Before...
Chapter 10.2: ...and After
Chapter 11.1: Day in the Life
Chapter 11.2: To Arms
Chapter 11.3: Cut throat
Chapter 11.4: Your Technology
Chapter 11.5: Future Girl vs. Corruption
Chapter 11.6: The Full Force
Chapter 11.7: Answers
Chapter 11.8: This is Our Night
Chapter 12.1: Worth Investigating
Chapter 12.2: A Unique Perspective
Chapter 12.3: We've Got Ghosts
Chapter 12.4: Plesiosaurus
Chapter 12.5: The Impossible
Chapter 12.6: Guilty as Charged
Chapter 13.1: Proscenium vs. Dr. Critique
Chapter 13.2: The Source of Your Power
Chapter 13.3: Night of Thunder
Chapter 14: Origin Story, part 1
Chapter 14: Origin Story, part 2
Chapter 14: Origin Story, part 3
Chapter 14: Origin Story, part 4
Chapter 14: Origin Story, part 5
Chapter 15.1: Major Crazy Conspiracy
Chapter 15.2: Helicopter
Chapter 15.3: That's a Little Harsh
Chapter 15.4: Confession
Chapter 15.5: Allies
Chapter 16.1: The Ergosphere
Chapter 16.2: A Void In You
Chapter 16.3: Rum and Coke
Chapter 16.4: Hoedown
Chapter 16.4: In Pursuit
Chapter 16.5: Specific Aura
Chapter 16.6: The Lawless Land
Chapter 17.1: From Left to Right
Chapter 17.2: Newly Reconstructed
Chapter 17.3: Understanding
Chapter 17.4: Control
Chapter 17.5: Here Forever
Chapter 18.1: Brawl at the Ultramax
Chapter 18.2: Fighting the Air
Chapter 18.3: Who Are You?
Chapter 19.1: Some Stuff to Deal With
Chapter 19.2: The Heart of It
Chapter 19.3: Against the Submarine
Chapter 19.4: Much Resistance
Chapter 19.5: The Holy One
Chapter 19.6: Manufacturers
Chapter 19.7: Fun
Chapter 19.8: Whirlwind of Destruction
Chapter 20.1: The Temple
Chapter 20.2: Priestess
Chapter 20.3: What Makes Us Tick
Chapter 20.4: In Trouble
Chapter 20.5: The Worst Nightmare
Chapter 20.6: If I Die
Chapter 20.7: Stating the Obvious
Chapter 20.8: This Other Universe
Chapter 20.9: Blood
Chapter 20.10: Phenomenal
Author's note

Chapter 4.4: Rat in a Maze

26 5 2
By MacFrenzy


Proscenium marched forward and kicked down the workshop doors.

There was Dr. Critique, sitting on Santa's chair. He wore two cardboard boxes as clothes, one over his chest, and the other as a makeshift pair of shorts. His skinny, pale arms and legs poked out of holes in the boxes. On his head, over his unkept red hair, he wore a boat-shaped tinfoil hat. On the front of his cardboard chestplate, he had the words "Yeah, right" written in black magic marker.

"Care to sit on Santa's lap?" Critique said.

Two young women sat at Critique's left and right, with brown sacks over their faces, and their hands and feet tied.

"What have you done to them?" Proscenium asked, raising both fists.

"Nothing yet," Critique said. "Art doesn't exist in a vacuum, you know. It requires an audience."

Proscenium stepped forward and froze. It was as if the armor had petrified on the spot. He could feel himself willing it to move, but it wouldn't budge. He tried turning into a cloud, but couldn't do that, either.

"Do you like it?" Critique said. "It's a new addition to my arsenal, designed just for you. Beautiful, in its way."

Critique stood up and took a few steps toward Proscenium. "Now, which one of my little babies should I mutilate first? It's all for your entertainment."

Critique paced back and forth. "How to choose one victim over the other? What qualities make one worth saving and one worth permanently scarring? What makes one more delectably deserving of pain than the other?"

Critique leaned in close, his face inches away from Proscenium's mask.

"Art reflects life, my friend," he said. "If art is meaningless, then life must also be meaningless."

He turned away from Proscenium and shuffled over to the woman on the right.

"Did you hear that darling?" he said to her. "Your life is completely meaningless."

He then hopped over to the woman on the left and said, "Same with you, my little snickerdoodle. You are a living piece of art. As art, you have no meaning, and as a living creature, you also have no meaning."

"And killing?" Proscenium said. "Does ending a life also have no meaning to you?"

"You can talk," Critique said. "I didn't know if you'd be able to talk in this state. That's happily interesting."

He jumped up and down and clapped his hands. He then reached around behind Santa's chair and pulled out a hunting knife. It looked like an antique, but recently sharpened.

"Take blood, for instance," Critique said. "Blood is red and it's always been red – no matter who you are. No matter what your accomplishments or your failures, no matter what you believe, think, or feel, your blood will still be red."

He faced away from Proscenium and continued, as if speaking only to the two women.

"And why red? Why not green or blue or purple or Crystal Pepsi? The color red has no meaning as blood. Its only symbolic resonance comes from the millions of writers and artists over the years who see anything red and compare it to blood. Strip away the words and images and all you're left with is blood. Meaningless, purposeless blood."

He placed the knife down on Santa's chair and placed a palm on top of each woman's head. He pulled the sacks off.

Each young woman was teary-eyed, with duct tape over her mouth. Proscenium knew them – Krissi and Trissi from earlier that evening.

"One was going to watch the other bleed," Critique said, again turning to face Proscenium. "How joyous is it that you came along. A real audience. Someone who can take in the red of the blood at face value, without ascribing any symbolism or, ugh, meaning to it."

"Why these two?" Proscenium said.

"No reason."

"There is a reason."

For the first time this evening, Critique stopped smiling. "I never have a reason."

"Why not kill some bums, them?" Proscenium said. "Or break into someone's house? Why hide out in Santa's village where everything smells like peppermint, and where mall security will eventually find this crime scene?"

"Shut up."

"Why would you use special, one-of-a-kind katana paintbrushes as your murder weapon on your last three killings?"

"I said, shut up."

"You knew those brushes would be traced to you somehow, along with the peppermint smell."

"There's no reason for what I do," Critique said. "Nothing has any meaning."

"And now I am trapped, unable to move," Proscenium said. "How did you learn to do this?"

"Meaningless! Meaningless!"

Proscenium waited for a few seconds, then he dropped the bomb. "You're working for someone else."

"That's enough out of you and your empty rhetoric."

"Someone must have instructed you to wait outside these actresses' theater to snatch them," Proscenium said. "Someone gave you access to the mall and Santa's village. Someone told you to use those brushes."

"Be quiet!" Critique said, slapping his bare foot against the floor. "Don't you want to see the blood?"

"Someone instructed you to take these two specific victims from their theater tonight," Proscenium said. "Someone had a reason for doing all this. Therefore, won't these women's deaths mean something?"

"Not in my eyes," Critique said. "In my eyes, their lives are as meaningless as mine and yours."

"But in someone else's eyes, the events of this evening have meaning," Proscenium said. "You know, deep in your heart, that you're acting out a purpose, that your art will, indeed, mean something."

Critique glared at Krissi and Trissi, and then up at Proscenium. His usual smile faded into a frown. He dropped the knife, letting it fall to the floor with a loud clang.

"The money," he said. "The money was just too good."

He ran out of the room. Proscenium fell forward, as whatever hold Critique had on him faded.

Krissi and Trissi turned to Proscenium, making the familiar "Mph! Mph!" noise of mouths covered with duct tape.

He quickly undid the cuffs binding the two women and disappeared into the shadows by becoming a cloud.

Hovering into the back areas of the attraction, Proscenium followed Critique's path through the fake snow into the employees-only area. Proscenium then traced the faint peppermint-wax smell into an employee bathroom, where part of the floor had been previously torn open and dug through into the sewer system below.

Proscenium floated through the hole down into a cramped sewer pipe, fed directly by the toilets of the entire mall. He found Critique's cardboard clothes and tinfoil hat down there. This meant that somewhere in Theater City's sewer system, a naked, pale, skinny man was swimming through the waste of an entire city.

Proscenium decided to end the chase for now.

* * * *

When Proscenium returned to his theater, Curtain couldn't wait to hear about the night's events. First, he quizzed Curtain on her studies that evening, and the young woman showed how much she understood what she had read. Despite Curtain's attitude, she was a good student. Proscenium then told her about Dr. Critique.

"I should've been there," Curtain said. "I could've watched your back."

"He would have killed you."

"Doubt it. And I can't believe he abducted two chicks who act here. What are the odds?"

"Even," Proscenium said. "Critique did not engineer this by himself. He's working for someone. Someone knows."

"About what?"

"About me."

Curtain let that sink in. "Oh."

"Perhaps someone has seen me come and go from this building," Proscenium said. "Or, perhaps, someone knows more."

"How?"

"I don't know. The paintbrush murders were designed specifically to draw me out. Clues only I could detect, and unseen tech designed specifically to incapacitate me. I have become a rat in someone's maze."

Curtain folded her arms. "That's scary."

"Concentrate on your studying," Proscenium said. "Let me worry about this."

Curtain studied for a few more hours until Proscenium played just right few notes at the antique organ, turning Curtain's body into purple smoke, which flowed into the organ for a day's sleep.

Proscenium should have joined Curtain. Instead, he switched to his cloudform and flowed up through the theater, reforming into a solid on thebuilding's roof. He watched the sunrise and listened to the first stirrings oftraffic the other early-morning signs of life in the city. 

# # # # 

END OF CHAPTER 4 

# # # # 

Next: History lesson.



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