CHAPTER 14
Apparently Jennie had already met Irene prior to her starting day at work. Jennie personally interviewed the girl to see if she was qualified for the position considering the high stakes that it included. So the following morning, Jennie held Chaeyoung's hand and led her to their office on the 8th floor since it was an hour before class started and the older girl suggested that Chaeyoung stay with her before class.
On the elevator ride up, Jennie had a small smile on her lips and her thumb caressed the skin of Chaeyoung's hand that was clasped in hers. Ever since Chaeyoung started living and sleeping beside her, she's been sleeping more peacefully. Her focus and determination during work has been on an all time high and uninterrupted since she's been having quality sleep and rest as well as healthy meals on a regular basis. Not to mention she's been rebuilding and rekindling her relationship with the blonde and it has significantly boosted her mood and disposition.
Chaeyoung couldn't help but stare at the girl beside her. She's been noticing that Jennie really doesn't take care of herself well and she's glad that now that she's living with the older girl, she could at least monitor her and her health. She didn't want a repeat of the other day when Jennie forgot to eat for the whole day because of work. Heaven knows how many meals and slumber the older girl has skipped within the 4 years that they've drifted apart.
Chaeyoung stared at Jennie's under eyes. It didn't have pronounced dark circles like before. She's relieved to know that the older girl has been having a regular amount of deep sleep every night. She made a mental note to ask the older girl what helps her sleep well at night so she could provide the older girl with what she needs.
The elevator stopped on the 8th floor and opened to reveal a very beautiful lady with jet black hair. She was wearing natural make-up that didn't look too heavy on her face. Her skin was white as snow that it could rival Chaeyoung's perfect skin. Her eyebrows were done perfectly and she had red lipstick on. Her cheekbones and jaw were pronounced and sharp so she looked somewhat intimidating.
She had on a form fitting black dress and on her arm hung her blue Prada bag that she hasn't set down due to the clutter on the desk that she is currently trying to tame. She was too preoccupied to notice the pair stepping out of the elevator.
Jennie led the way to the front desk and her heels clicked as she did so, causing Irene to lift her head and stare at the CEO. Bowing towards Jennie she gave the girl a smile and greeted her "Good morning Miss Kim."
Irene focused her gaze solely on Jennie like no one else was in the lobby with them while Chaeyoung waited for the girl to greet her. A few seconds passed and Irene still hasn't dropped her gaze towards Jennie and Chaeyoung cleared her throat to make her presence known.
"Good Morning Miss uhm?" Irene furrowed her brow in confusion. She really did not recognize who Chaeyoung is.
Has she been living under a rock?
Her engagement was literally blasted in every social media and multimedia portal possible. By now everyone knew that Jennie Kim was betrothed to Park Chaeyoung but here is this new secretary seemingly oblivious to their engagement. Chaeyoung didn't know if she should be glad or annoyed that someone in this country did not have any clue to who she is. Her thoughts were interrupted when Jennie unclasped their fingers and instead wrapped her arm around Chaeyoung's waist to pull her flush against her body.
"This is my fiancé, Park Chaeyoung." Jennie then turned her head towards Chaeyoung and gave her a small smile.
Chaeyoung's cheeks were tinted a slight hint of red. She will never get used to Jennie calling her, her fiancé. Glancing towards Irene, she caught the secretary eyeing Jennie's arm that was wrapped around her waist while subtly furrowing her eyebrows. She thought she was imagining it since it only lasted for a split second before the girl quickly snapped her eyes up and locked gazes with Chaeyoung. Irene knew she had been caught staring so she squared her shoulders and gave Chaeyoung a small smile and nodded curtly at the girl. "Miss Park."
Jennie being oblivious to what was currently transpiring between the two ladies, interrupted them. "Irene, have you read my schedule for the day?"
Irene nodded and gladly shifted her gaze back to Jennie. "You have 3 meetings for the day. One with the Accounting Department at 9am, the second with the Board of Directors and Stockholders at 1pm and the last one with Marketing and Branding at 4pm. I made sure to message the guests to make sure they won't be late nor absent during the meeting. I've also read through the papers you sent me and sorted them all out. Your emails are also all sorted out as well."
Jennie was clearly impressed. She made a mental note to thank Jisoo for recommending Irene to her. "Good. I expect nothing less from you, Irene."
Seeing that she's impressed the young CEO made Irene smile widely and nod. The secretary watched the pair walk past her and into their office.
The day before, Jennie ordered a similar desk chair as hers and she was glad to see that it was already delivered. She wanted Chaeyoung to have a chair beside her for when the girl decided to spend time there and since her desk was spacious she just put their chairs beside each other.
The pair sat beside each other and Jennie immediately started checking her emails on her desktop. Chaeyoung on the other hand was having an inner turmoil beside the older girl.
She was not the kind of person to immediately dislike or have a negative outlook towards another person without further getting to know them. She wanted to give people the benefit of the doubt and she always wanted to see the good in everyone. But right now, against her better judgement, she can't help but want to rip Irene's eyes out for staring too much at Jennie.
Her stomach dropped when she realized that even though in front of the media and their families, she was Jennie's fiancé but she was her fiancé for convenience. For business. She was the next richest heiress in the country after Jennie and it just made sense for the two to get married. That's all.
So who was she to stop Irene from ogling her fiancé when she really wasn't a fiancé by choice when in fact she's Jennie's fiancé for convenience?
Who was she to claim what isn't hers in the first place?
Chaeyoung deflated further into her chair. Her insecurities started to rise up one by one and she immediately started fiddling with her necklace in hopes of calming her thoughts.
Irene was so much prettier than me why wouldn't Jennie gravitate toward her instead? Irene was clearly a lot curvier than me, maybe I should diet more? Maybe Irene could sing better than me? What if she dances better too? What if she fulfils Jennie's needs better than I ever could? But I love her. I love her. I love Jennie. But can she love me back?
Chaeyoung often had moments like this where all her insecurities would bubble up and give her an anxiety attack. This was the result of Chaeyoung being born into a family of singers and actors aside from businessmen. From the moment Chaeyoung was conceived in her mother's womb, the media has been following her. Korea's Golden Girl, born and groomed to be her family's gem. She has been trained and born with the talent to sing, dance, act and play instruments. When she was a child, the media wasn't that noticeable but when she turned into a teenager they started being much more aggressive in following the girl's activities. Park Chaeyoung has been under a microscope her whole life. She has to be perfect and she has to be flawless. All. The. Time.
Chaeyoung noticed her hands started trembling slightly and she clasped them together in order to stop it. Her heart beat started picking up and she was sure she's going to start hyperventilating in a couple of seconds if she can't suppress this. In a few seconds, her chest started hurting and she felt like it was giving her some sort of a choking sensation that made it harder for her to breathe.
Hearing the younger girl's ragged breathing, Jennie turned in her seat and faced her fiancé. Her eyes widened and she realized what's happening. It's not the first time Jennie's seen this.
Fuck she's having an anxiety attack
She immediately pulled Chaeyoung's chair so that she's directly in front of the girl. Jennie had her knees spread out to pull Chaeyoung's chair closer to her making Chaeyoung's knees rest between Jennie's separate ones. Chaeyoung was now hyperventilating and had her eyes shut closed. The younger girl's hands clasped tightly together and was being lightly pounded against her own chest in an effort to stop her chest from hurting.
Jennie has seen this multiple times but each time still scares her. She hates seeing Chaeyoung in pain.
Jennie gently pried Chaeyoung's clasped hands and held them in hers. She started drawing calming circles on both the younger girl's hands using her own. She could feel her palms trembling. Jennie scooted closer to Chaeyoung and rested her forehead against the younger girl's damp one gently. She lifted the younger girl's right hand and placed it on her chest above her heart. She placed her left hand above Chaeyoung's right one that was pressed against her heart to make sure it stayed there.
"Chae, I know you can hear me. Listen to me, okay? I'm here with you. I want you to feel my heart beat okay Chaengie?" Jennie whispered gently against Chaeyoung's lips that was inches away from hers since their foreheads were pressed against each other.
The older girl felt a slight nod from Chaeyoung and she sighed in momentary relief that at least the hyperventilating girl was responsive to a degree.
"I'm going to breathe and I want you to follow me. Can you do that for me, Chae?" Jennie felt a slight nod again and the older girl began to breathe deeply and steadily in hopes of the younger girl following suit.
Jennie was drawing calming circles still on Chaeyoung's hands and she was noticing the trembling lessening.
Chaeyoung's breathing started to calm down after a minute and a half. The girls were still in the same position and Jennie was relieved that the younger girl was starting to calm down a bit. After several minutes, Chaeyoung opened her eyes slowly and she gazed into Jennie's brown orbs that were staring back at here with the same loving intensity. They were close enough to see the details in each other's eyes since their foreheads were against each other.
Chaeyoung's thumb on her right hand that was still pressed against Jennie's heart started to move back and forth against the older girl's chest in an attempt to caress the older girl's heart in gratitude for pulling her out of another anxiety attack.
Time and time again, Jennie never fails to prove that she is and always will be Chaeyoung's solace.
Chaeyoung noticing how uncomfortable Jennie's position must be and wanting to be closer to the older girl, she slowly wrapped her arms around Jennie's neck and straddled her thighs. Chaeyoung was now fully on top of Jennie, she was sitting on the older girl's lap and her right hand was placed at the back of Jennie's neck her fingers between her hair and caressing her scalp.
Their foreheads were still leaning against each other and both girls can't seem to stop gazing into each other's eyes.
Jennie wrapped her arms around the younger girl's waist and gently pulled her closer to her torso completely eliminating any space between their bodies.
Jennie wanted to just say it. She wanted to say those three words to the girl but her heart was beating so hard that she could hardly think if this is the right time and situation or not. It's getting harder and harder for her to control herself around the girl and each day that passes just makes it hard for her to conceal her feelings.
She didn't want to scare her away. She valued their friendship too much and the thought of getting rejected by Chaeyoung and potentially breaking their friendship just scared her to no end. She can settle with having the girl as a friend rather than not having her at all.
A few minutes later, her senses just left her altogether when Chaeyoung's fingers that was lightly massaging her scalp lightly tugged at her hair making Jennie purr against the younger girl's lips. Jennie unwrapped her arms around Chaeyoung and started to run her hands up and down Chaeyoung's sides to reciprocate the girl's ministrations.
Jennie rubbed the tip of her nose against Chaeyoung's and moved her head from side to side in order to nuzzle their noses against each other. Chaeyoung smiled at this and released a happy sigh.
"How are you feeling?" Jennie whispered against the girl's lips gently as to not ruin the mood around them.
Chaeyoung placed a grateful kiss against Jennie's cheek and leaned her forehead back against the older girl's before whispering back "A lot better actually. Thank you again."
"Do you want to talk about it? What caused it?" Jennie looked at the girl in concern. She really would like to know what triggered it this time. She wanted to shield Chaeyoung from it if she could.
I'm scared of the possibility of someone taking you away from me.
"Maybe later?" and Jennie nodded in agreement with Chaeyoung's wish. She let Chaeyoung hide her face in the crook of her neck and lean her weight on the older girl.
Jennie wrapped the girl in her arms and hoped she could at least eliminate the reason that caused her anxiety attack.