Around Me (feat. Don Toliver) - Metro Boomin
THEA'S POV:
Screams rang.
Someone was yelling.
My hands were clamped over my ears and I was cowered in the alley, eyes screwed shut. Breaths strangled my throat. I panted, heaving for air. I heard someone speak next to me but the words were muffled and unintelligible.
I peeled my eyes open. Lamplight licked up the dark alley. As I tried to refocus on my surroundings, I froze at the sight of a gaping maw left in the window of the strip club ahead. Glass strew over the ground like a fluttering of petals. What was that sound? What had caused the window to break like that? It had been so loud, so terrifying that it put a shock to my every sense in the heat of the moment. It sounded like... gunshots.
My gaze slowly drifted away from the shattered window and drew past the shoulder of the man before me. I looked up to find Synn's huge body shielding mine - not only mine, but his friend's too.
Despite the cries tearing through the air, all I could hear was my heartbeat and the slow, laboured breaths of the beautiful figure crouched on his knees. His face was right in front of mine. His broad shoulders rose and lowered, his face screwed in discomfort. There was a clench to his jaw and a soft tremor of his arms which he'd wrapped around us both. My chest shuddered as I tried to inhale. He was so close to me that I could smell him - that familiar musk which warmed my insides.
Everything returned.
The curly haired man gripped Synn's shoulder tightly. "Are you okay?" He looked over his shoulder. "What the fuck was that? How did they-"
"Baby, are you hurt?"
My brows pulled together as I looked up at Synn, his deep, soothing voice clasping my heart. How could he ask me that? He was the one who'd taken the blast, not me. Those had been gunshots, bullets which had shattered the glass, and he'd protected me. Protected us. He'd shielded us like armour, and yet here he was asking whether I was the one hurt or not. Still trying to revive my vocal cords, I frowned and shook my head shakily.
The other man directed his gaze my way. "You okay, princess?"
Somehow, I managed to nod my head. Synn lowered his arms and winced. Again, the man with the name Carmelos looked over at Synn, a flicker of concern lighting his eyes. There was no time to recuperate before another person was shrieking from inside and I snapped my head to the side. Suddenly, people were spilling out of the strip club from the front doors like a spluttering tap: women who looked like strippers in corsets and underwear and business men in suits staggering out onto the roads. More bangs cut through the air and I flinched sharply, clamping my hands over my ears.
"Don't let them leave," Synn ordered abruptly to Carmelos, watching the situation unfold whilst keeping me pressed against the wall. "We need to find out who's firing those shots."
As soon as the gunshots ceased, there was more frenzy as others filed out of the club. The huge, tattooed man straightened but gritted his teeth. He took a step towards the side door of the club, but his friend was already stepping in front of him and putting a hand on his shoulder. "Don't go in there. I'll handle this," he said reassuringly, making Synn clench his jaw. "Trust me. Emilio's in there. We can handle this. You go take care of Thea. She needs you right now more than we do."
At his words, Synn looked down at me sitting against the wall, my ears still ringing from the shock of the situation. His eyes softened for a brief moment.
I tilted my chin up, eyes moving on their own accord. "Will..." I said hoarsely, finally finding my voice, "Will you be okay?"
Carmelos smiled a reassuring smile. "I'll be just dandy."
"Keep me updated on the situation. No one's going home until we find out who's behind this," said Synn sternly and the other man nodded. For a moment, it looked like he wanted to say more: there was a swirling of his eyes and a slight twitch of his hand and he raised it briefly, only for his hand to drop and return as a fist by his side. He exhaled. Hastily, Synn turned and leaned down in front of me. He began lifting me to my feet. "I've got you, little baby. You're safe."
Before I could stand fully, my eyes zoned in on the silver card I'd dropped to the street. It glowed a strange pink for a moment before my fingers were quickly curling around it.
I stumbled like a newborn fawn but Synn's strong hold on my forearm steadied me on my feet. When I looked back at where Carmelos stood, my anxiety grew when I saw he was no longer there, having disappeared into the club, but it was the man beside me who drew me back to reality by the startling pace in his steps as he hastened away from the building with his hands over my shoulders.
Unstably, I tottered and tried to keep up with him. "Wh-Where are we going?" I asked, eyes darting about as he pushed us down another dark alley.
"I'm taking you home."
"No... No, no. You can't."
"Thea, you'll be safe at home. No one can hurt you there."
"I came here to talk to you. You can't just send me home after I came all the way here!"
"I can and I will. You almost got hurt tonight, all because of your foolish decision to come here on your own. Do you have any idea what could have happened if I hadn't come outside?" he gritted, looking down to hold my fierce gaze. His words stirred something inside me, something similar to when I was faced with Mama. I tried not to wince at the thought of what could have happened, at how close I was to getting a bullet in my head - just like before - but my heart was on fire and I had too much to say to back down now. He couldn't make me.
We reached one of the roads and our footsteps echoed briskly down the empty street. "I don't care," I said and shook my head, hair falling about my face. "I'm not going home, not until we talk."
"I'm not doing this with you."
"Yes, you are, whether you like it or not!"
The tall, beautiful man came to a stop in the middle of the street. All of a sudden, his eyes became smokey and dark. Swallowing, I channelled everything inside me to keep meeting his gaze, no matter how much I wanted to cower away from him, but the more I looked up at him, the less I was so certain of myself. The street was dark, like someone had spitefully drawn blackout curtains to the moon and what glimmers were left of the stars. Synn stared at me for a long moment. His chain dangled from his neck and rested along his exposed, tattooed collarbone.
"I'm lenient with you, Thea," he started and took a small step towards me, "But don't think you can speak to me like that and get away with it."
Nervously, I swallowed in search of words. He exhaled through his lips, eyes falling shut for a brief moment, then opened them once more. Synn's smouldering gaze returned to mine.
"Fine. We're having it your way."
With that, he was turning and tugging me forward by the arm. Reliefswept over me and I patted my pockets for the silver card, making sure it was still there. I knew my stubbornness would come in handy someday.
A few minutes later, we came to a halt and my eyes widened at what was beside us. It was a motorcycle, or perhaps it was a monster: a pure black construction of metal and it reflected menacingly in the lamplight. Pulling my lower lip between my teeth, Synn lifted the seat and pulled out a huge, black helmet. He turned to me and held it out.
"Put this on."
Trying to block out the guilt of disobeying my mother yet again, I took a small breath. "Okay," I agreed hesitantly. Eyes flickering about the rest of the bike, I frowned. "Do you have one as well?"
The man swung one leg over the bike with ease before looking at me silently. He looked insanely attractive in this position, with his thick thighs spread over the seat and his black shirt straining against his chest. He raised a brow. I shouldn't have even been thinking about such things and could feel a warm blush threatening to spill over my cheeks the more he stared at me. Realising that he hadn't answered my question, I furrowed my brows again, then held out the helmet to him.
"You should wear it-"
"Put on the fucking helmet, baby."
I narrowed my eyes. Huffing, I put the heavy helmet over my head and did the clasp under my chin but it was still incredibly loose.
"Here."
He leaned forward. His fingers grazed my neck as he tightened the strap under my chin and I sucked in a sharp breath; I couldn't have been more grateful for the dark glass of the helmet concealing the heat of my face as he looked down at me. Then, he did something else unpredictable. His strong hands planted themselves on my waist and he hoisted me onto the bike behind him. Swinging his leg over the bike again, he undid a lever at the bottom before settling on his two feet.
"Put your arms around me," he said.
Cautiously, I paused and shifted at the back of the seat.
"Do you want to fall off?"
"No, but we shouldn't-"
"Then put your arms around me. Ahora."
[Now.]
There was no choice but for me to obey and I bit my lip as I slipped my arms loosely around his waist whilst trying to keep an adequate space between us. I was sure we looked a sight to any onlookers nearby, with my butt sidling backwards as far as possible and my arms barely encompassing the huge man in front of me, determined not to touch too much (and lose even more of my self control). But when the engine started, the motorbike purred loudly from beneath me and we were lurching onto the road.
I was right. This wasn't a bike. It really was a monster.
I squeaked loudly as he sped down the empty street and instantly let go of the idea of personal space. Squeezing my eyes shut, I drew my arms tightly around Synn and pressed my helmet-clad head against his back. I wasn't about to die tonight! Strands of hair whipped about my helmet like leaves in a storm. A deep chill passed under my clothes and I found myself pressing further into the human radiator sitting in front of me in a desperate search for warmth.
The motorcycle was faster than anything I'd experienced. Even with my eyes shut, I was starting to get disoriented. After a few minutes of growing accustomed to the monstrous hum between my thighs, I reluctantly opened my eyes.
The world blurred into a stream of colours like a painting from Monet. Nighttime hues of grey and gold were all that surrounded us. Down the empty roads, the threatening roar of the motorbike soon turned to a distant rumble. The rush of wind billowing my coat switched from a brush of hostility to a friendly welcome. Seeing it now - the world in an eternity of motion - it wasn't so scary. It was actually... nice. There was something comforting about the realm we were trapped in: mere onlookers to the reality outside our colourful bubble. Here, no one could touch us. No one could hurt us.
All thoughts of the strip club were momentarily forgotten. Tilting my head to the side, I found a large smile streaking my lips. Slowly, we came to a stop at a traffic light. I contemplated tapping Synn on the shoulder to ask if we could go faster but the undeniable tension between us forced me to settle with my arms around him, kicking my legs gently back and forth beside us.
As the light turned green, I was left grasping at his shirt to hang on as he accelerated forward. It was as if he could read my mind. He rode down countless streets and passed building upon building, skilfully weaving between cars and turning down small alleys. All the while, I became more and more aware of the man I was holding onto. My fingers were splayed across his abdomen. His black shirt did little to conceal what was underneath. I could feel every inch of warm muscle, every ridge of his sculpted torso, the every clench of his stomach as he leaned forward. I could feel it all.
The next time we reached a stoplight, awkwardness compelled me to move my hands away from him and loosen my hold. He probably felt uncomfortable.
"What are you doing?"
I poked my head to the side.
"Hm?"
"I said, what are you doing?" He turned his head slightly. "Put them back."
While I hesitated to do what he'd asked, his hand wrapped around the both of mine and pulled me flush against his back. My breath hitched. His hand didn't move from mine and instead kept them nestled against his abdomen, trapped between strong, tattooed fingers and warm rings I knew existed on his thumb, index and ring finger. His fingers brushed over my knuckles, smooth rings rolling past skin, and my tummy tensed in response.
I couldn't move away. It had been so long since I'd held these hands. I'd missed the roughness of them, the warmth in them, the dark artwork charting the backs of them which snaked up his arms to God-knows-elsewhere.
But they'd also had... blood on them.
Even now I could picture the same lurid blood leaking from between his fingers like the pulp of a fruit. I could see it all in front of me.
The ghost of the dead man suddenly flashed in my head and I tore my hands away like he was burning to touch. I couldn't: I couldn't let him hold me like before, no matter how much my heart wanted him to.
This time, Synn said nothing. Gradually, he withdrew his hand. He placed it back on the handle. Although there was silence, his body had said all I needed to hear and regret swam inside me. I knew it had hurt him. I could feel the tension between his ribs like a hummingbird trapped in a cage as I fisted his shirt in my hands. It had me biting my lip in pain and I turned my head away. I wasn't here to mend things over. I was here to give him the card and warn him to stay safe. That was all I could ask of him.
No more... right?
The minutes felt like hours before we came to a final stop. The bike slowed down the main street of a familiar city. Reluctantly, I dropped my arms from his waist. My hands went to the helmet and I struggled before clicking it and lifting it off my head. Blowing my hair from my forehead, it floated down in messy wisps. Synn stepped off the bike. His tall figure still towered over me from this height but as I searched for his eyes, they didn't meet mine. My stomach clenched. His hands slipped around my waist and he lifted me off the bike, then set me down on the pavement.
Lifting my head, I looked around at where we had arrived. A vague memory developed like a Polaroid in my head and I soon realised he'd brought me to his apartment building. I tilted my head backwards and looked up, up, up but couldn't spot the top of the building where I knew his penthouse awaited.
Synn took the helmet from my hands and tucked it under the seat before taking a step towards the glass building. Cautiously, I scurried after him, hyperaware that I was now in a city I didn't know in the slightest and away from home.
Away from Mama.
If only she knew what I was doing right now.
Following after Synn was a feat I'd never been a fan of, with his long, relentless strides. Reaching the spinning doors, I hastily stepped into the same compartment as him. He didn't look at me. We both entered a luxurious reception area bursting with golden lights and chandeliers. For a moment, I was awestruck by the extravagance. I could practically feel it melting, dissolving on my tongue like a drug which made my eyes glazy - perhaps this was all that rich people and celebrities saw of the world.
But all that went away as Synn's back came into view in the bright, vivid lighting.
His shirt was torn in a dozen places.
He was... bleeding.
How had I not seen it before? Was that what had happened when the window shattered? When he'd tried to protect us? The wounds were as clear as day in the warm, expensive lighting but the guards stationed around the reception didn't make a move towards him.
My mouth hung agape as he moved towards the elevator and I trailed after him swiftly. As he pressed the button, my fingers found his sleeve and I tugged.
"Synn, you're hurt."
He stayed quiet. The doors open. He stepped inside the elevator and looked at me, dark blue eyes beckoning me to follow.
"You need to go to a doctor," I said worriedly and squeezed inside.
"It's nothing. You said you wanted to talk, no?"
I recoiled at his words, guilt shifting inside me like a monster. "But I-I didn't see you were injured." Again, he said nothing and the doors pulled shut, sealing us in a box of cold, cruel unease. My heart stuttered at the proximity of him being near. Cautiously, I looked up at the beautiful man and hoped I could convey the softness in my eyes, the love I held for him deep inside which I couldn't express by tongue. He stayed staring at the bars in front of us without a ripple of emotion except for contempt. "I'm sorry, let's go. Let's get you treated, please."
"I've dealt with worse. This is nothing."
Brows creasing, I looked guiltily into the palm of my hands at the conflict of emotion inside me. I had been so sure about coming here but seeing Synn beside me in pain, being in pain because of me, it had my stomach in shreds.
The elevator pinged and the doors opened, revealing a familiar hallway and a familiar set of guards all the way at the end. I tailed behind as he stalked in front, leaving a trail of ice in his path, and wordlessly wished I'd never come here tonight. Mama was right, like always. When we reached the door, Synn tapped his card and brushed past the men standing to the side. I ducked my head at them, smiling politely, and slipped inside after him.
The door shut.
The penthouse was dark. As soon as I entered, I was met with a breathtaking sight of the city through huge, extending windows; but the moon was still hidden from sight, hiding in fear of Synn and the ice-fury melting from his every pore, and darkness enveloped the expanse of the kitchen and living room. A ghostly light from the city illuminated the man as he stood in the centre with his back towards me. I stood by the door and raised my hands to my chest.
"Synn," I said softly. "Please listen to me. At-At least let me treat your wounds, hm?"
Slowly, he turned.
"Why did you come?"
His voice came quietly, a deep hum through the room that rippled and disappeared into the shadows.
"We can talk about that later. First, let's get you treated and then we can-"
"No, Thea, baby. You're going to tell me why you came so I can stop driving myself crazy and making up answers for myself."
I paused and contemplated my next words carefully. "I came... I came here to warn you," I answered but my heart ached at the half-truth. "I met this... woman and she said some scary things and I thought she would hurt you. I didn't want her to hurt you."
"That's the only reason you came?"
Swallowing, I nodded my head.
In turn, he nodded also. It was a slow, purposeful nod and he tilted his head to face the kitchen, leaving me to stare at the side of his profile. He was drenched in darkness and before I knew it, the sound of pattering filled the penthouse; raindrops. Synn passed a hand through his messy hair and with every passing drop of water, I could almost see it slipping down the strands and dampening it. Still nodding to himself, he slipped his hands into his pockets while looking into the kitchen.
"Bien. You can leave."
[Okay.]
"Wh... What?"
His eyes swept over to me. "You told me what you came to say. That's all, verdad?"
[Right?]
I chewed my lip harshly. "That woman gave me this card and-and I thought I should give it to you too. Maybe you can figure someth-"
"I don't care about the card."
"Why? It's important!"
"I don't care about the fucking card. I care about why," he said deeply and took a slow step towards me, "You decided to come to a strip club in the middle of the night to find me. I care about why you put yourself in danger all over again when you know what could happen when you're with me. Do you need a repeat of what happened before? I thought one murder was enough for you."
My throat plunged into my stomach like a spear and I looked up at him, wide-eyed. Who was this man? I... didn't recognise him. There was a dark, dark expression on his face, one which resembled the expression he wore on the day he sliced through that man's neck and watered the soil with his blood. His necklace swung from his neck as he took another step towards me and I mirrored him, stepping backwards. The action made his jaw clench, but then he smiled a malicious smile and raised his hands to his face.
"Why are you talking like that?" I said shakily. "You're..."
"Am I scaring you?"
I stopped.
Synn's dark hair scattered over his eyes as he stared at me, unmoving. The rain grew louder. He stepped towards me again.
"Do I scare you, Thea?"
His deep, accented voice washed over me and left me senseless in front of him. My mouth was sewn shut. With wide eyes, I watched the huge, tattooed man lift his hands to the buttons of his shirt. He began undoing them. One by one, they fell loose and the black shirt concealing him fell further and further past his shoulders. My heart pounded like a drum as he reached the last one and crumpled the shirt in his hands. He tossed it to the side.
I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe.
He took one more step closer to me and my eyes dropped to his tattooed chest: to the flowers coiling around his heart and winding around his soul; to the the vines that snaked across warm, rippling muscle; to the petals that kissed his skin from his biceps to his pectorals and the defined abdominals running down below. He was so breathtaking all I could do was stare at his strong, muscular body. More than anything, he was so much bigger than I could have imagined and it made me feel all the more smaller with the final step he took towards me, pressing me against the door.
"Do you fear me, Thea?" he whispered huskily. His smouldering eyes held mine before flickering to my lips. "You should."
Was I scared?
Did I fear him?
Did I fear the man who'd murdered with his bare hands or did I fear the man who had saved my life and protected me from all the bad in the world? Because he was one and the same.
"I-I'm not afraid of you," I stammered, but the dark man chuckled lowly. A flash of lightning crossed the room and half his face was cast in shadow, the other an unnerving white.
"Hm? But you sound so unconvincing, baby."
"I'm not afraid."
"Say it louder."
"I'm not afraid of you."
"Again."
"I'm not, afraid," I repeated strongly but the weakness in my eyes gave me away.
Synn observed me, his tall, hot frame looming over mine. He was so close I could raise a hand and touch him, press my hand to his beating heart and let my fingers drift down the ravines of his warm, chiselled body. A part of me wished to do so as he examined me but my heart was in my ears beating faster and faster, but not because I was scared.
Because I knew he would never hurt me, this feeling inside me was want.
The man smiled gently as his head hovered above mine. "You can leave now," he said in a whisper. "I'll call you a taxi. It's dark."
My jaw slackened as he pushed himself away from me and turned his back, revealing the cuts scattered over his shoulder blades and the blood colouring his tattoos.
"Don't come here again," he said with finality. "You've given me your warning. You've done your duty."
His every word slashed through my heart.
I released the breath I'd been holding and furrowed my brows at him, hot anger filling inside me. "Why are you treating me like this?" I demanded. A boom of thunder sounded and I stopped myself from flinching, letting my fingers ball into fists. He picked up his shirt and paused. I took a step away from the door, one step closer to him. "I-I don't understand. You're being mean and-and unfair. I know it was stupid of me to come and I know it was dangerous, but I wanted to keep you safe. I don't want you hurt!"
"You are not safe when you're with me. You're going to be the one to get hurt, so leave. Don't make me carry you down those stairs o así ayúdame, lo haré."
[Or so help me, I will.]
I stepped closer. "Why? Why am I in danger being around you? Who-Who are you?"
Synn worked his jaw. His hand tightened around the shirt in his hand.
"Aren't you going to tell me?" I said softly, searchingly. His silence and the rain were my answer. "But why? Why can't you tell me?"
"I told you to go."
"Tell me, please."
"I said, leave."
"Why can't you just tell me-"
"Because I fucking want you, Thea, and I can't have you!"
My breath hitched as I found him staring at me, a flicker of fire singeing his gaze. The rain pounded. It filled my ears like cold static and sent a shiver down my spine as the words processed and came together inside me.
"What?" I whispered.
"Don't you see? Every moment with you, I've been burning. My soul burns by your side," he said, voice breaking with every word like he was struggling to breathe. "But every moment away from you is a punishment I can't seem to bear."
I drew a fist to my chest as he turned to fully face me and I found my eyes moistening in confusion. What was he talking about?
"I thought watching you from afar would be enough for me. Seeing you smile, knowing that you were safe, I thought I could keep things the same for you. I was willing to do anything for you. But this yearning... I've never yearned for anything in my life but all I can do is yearn for you. My heart yearns for you. My body begs for you. My soul pleads for you.
"But I know I can't have you."
He stepped towards me and something wet grazed my cheek. He was... He had to be lying. He couldn't...
"You are a forbidden fruit and I am a starving man," he whispered achingly, his tattoos rippling over his body as he grew closer and closer. "Do you know how badly I would like to sin?"
The heat of his body returned until his hand was beside my head and he was shadowing me with the entirety of his frame.
"But part of me knows you can't handle a sinner. You deserve more. You deserve the good I can't give." My heart was ringing in my ears, telling me to run, but I couldn't decipher which way it was telling me to go. Synn inched towards me. He spoke lowly, quietly. "Could you handle a man who has killed with the same hands he holds you with? Or kiss you with a mouth that only knows violence? Could you take me as I am?"
I stared up at him searchingly in disbelief of his words. The rasp and pain in his voice had been stitched into every letter, every syllable that left his soft, pink lips. I was torn: torn between everything that I'd been taught by my mother and everything I believed in before me. My heart thundered like the world outside as another warm tear fell past my cheek and met the corner of my mouth. I was shaking, knees trembling. His eyes caught my every move and sorrow filled his gaze.
"Do you... fear me, Thea?"
Rain thundered above us and all that was heard was our soft, hastening breaths between our bodies.
And then in one fluid motion, I was pulling him down by his necklace and claiming his lips, successfully blurring our senses into oblivion.
*****
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Hey fudglings!
Okay I HAVE MANY MIXED EMOTIONS ABOUT THIS CHAPTER IDEK but OMG IT'S ABOUT TIME IT HAPPENED
THEY FINALLY KISSEDDDDD AHHHHH MY SWEETIES What did you guys think? Thoughts on what happened at the strip club? Who do you think was shooting :3 I actually really liked the conflict between Thea and Synn in this chapter. You could feel just how frustrated Synn was approaching the end by having to battle with his emotions and needing to protect the girl he loves AND I FOUND IT SO SAD HOW HE TRIED TO SCARE THEA INTO LEAVING AND BEING AFRAID OF HIM TO MAKE IT EASIER (but he was also super hot omg i died). AND HIS CONFESSION AHHHHHH I LOVE THE LINE "You are a forbidden fruit and I am a starving man. Do you know how badly I would like to sin?" AHHHHHH SHUT THE FUDGE UP I'm in love
GUYS I STARTED WATCHING THIS CHINESE DRAMA ON NETFLIX AND OH. MY. GOD. It's called Hidden Love it has to be one of the most beautiful romances I've ever seen I'M SO OBSESSED WITH THE MAIN LEADS AHHHHH I'M HAVING MY SOFT GIRL MOMENT I need myself a fluffy romance rn. Go watch it you won't regret it. Also I'm rewatching the Kdrama Extraordinary You atm AND OH MY I LITERALLY FORGOT HOW AMAZING IT IS. The concept of soulmates and being destined to be together, no matter how much keeps them apart- *slams table* give me it right now.
Potato question: what's your favourite kind of weather?
I've been asking everyone this lmao but my favourite is exactly 23-24ºC (warm) with a very light breeze and a slight shower of warm rain SO THEN YOU GET A RAINBOW!! It's very specific but yes that is the perfect weather for me. Generally I love warm weather, not too hot but not cold (at all) and I love feeling the sun on my face and I love the flowers blooming hehe :3
Anyway, thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed the chapter. If you did, please do vote, comment and share this book with your friends! I love you guys!
- Fudge x