What a plain ceiling.
Soft sounds of snoring and steady breaths filled the room as everyone slept peacefully through the night. For an unknown reason, I couldn't fall into a deep sleep. My body was on full alert, even though there was nothing to be alert about.
My heart was racing while my stomach churned, forcing me into a ball in a desperate attempt to subside the pain. This is stupid, what's wrong with me? I can't possibly be sick, can I? But I was completely fine all day.
My head began to feel light and I closed my eyes and winced. The only feeling I'm familiar with that is similar to what I'm going to right now would be anxiety. Severe anxiety. But why would I be feeling anxious at a time like this?
I made up with Levi.
I've decided to better my plan to kill Kenny rather than just rushing forward pointlessly.
The whole group has decided to focus on the expedition first.
Even with everything that has happened, things are slowly returning to as it used to be. If anything, I should be feeling relieved. Calm. Happy. And yet, here I am, drowning in the waves of anxiety.
I tucked in deeper in my covers and screwed my eyes shut, hoping I can force myself to sleep. I focused on my breathing, slowing it down so that it matched everyone else's steady breaths. I waited several minutes, hoping my attempt would work, but it was in vain.
Frustrated, I jumped from my bed, taking my blanket and wrapping it around my shoulders as I walked outside to find something that can help me sleep properly. A part of my blanket slightly dragged on the floor, but it didn't bother me. It didn't take long for me to reach the main room, and I immediately went to the kitchen to see if we had any form of sleeping pills or something.
One by one, I searched the small cabinets that were there. "Fuck," I hissed under my breath, failing to find anything. I snatched a glass and filled with some warm water, downing it down almost instantly. At around the same time, I heard a small confused voice behind me.
"(Y/N)?"
I turned around, surprised to see a tired looking Armin stand near the entrance of the kitchen. "Armin? Why are you still awake?"
Armin wiped one of his eyes, stifling a yawn. "Just finished wrapping up a part of the report with Eren."
"Until this late?"
He nodded. "We'll probably stay and guard the cabin tomorrow while everyone else goes out, so it's fine. Why are you here though?"
I showed him my empty glass. "Just getting a drink. I'm gonna head back soon anyway."
"Good. You should really get a lot of rest so your wound will heal properly."
I unconsciously wrapped the blanket around me tighter, hoping that Armin wouldn't notice that there were no longer any bandages underneath the sleeve of of my turtleneck. "Y-yeah... I will. Um, I'll go back to bed now."
"O..kay..." Armin stepped aside as I tried not to rush back to my room. Fear whirled in my mind as I imagined what would happen if others found out about my completely healed arm. Would they freak out? Would they send me off to some facility to be tested and examined?
Damnit stop thinking so much.
I plopped on my bed and shoved my head into the pillow, covering myself with all the covers. I tried my best to clear my mind from troubling thoughts and just focused on trying to sleep. I let my inner thoughts roam freely in my mind as I revelled in the calmness the warm darkness offered. As my mind began unlocking the deepest thoughts is when I finally felt myself drift away into a long awaited peaceful slumber.
*
The sound of rustling ended my resting time, the slightly annoying noise forcing me to open my eyes to identify it's source. I turned around, seeing through fuzzy eyes as Hanji struggled to put on her thick coat.
"Hanji?" I croaked out, the brunette glancing up in surprise. "(Y/N)! Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to wake you up."
Hanji zipped up her coat all the way to the top of her neck, crouching down to get her backpack over her shoulder. "Who are you going with?"
"Mikasa," Hanji answered in a hurry as she fumbled with her mask. "Petra's agreed to go with Erwin, and since Erwin doesn't want to leave Levi alone, he's going with them, but on a slightly separated path."
Half of Hanji's words became muffled as she clasped the mask on and pulled up her hoodie, giving me a nod and a pat on my head as she passed me. "See ya later, (Y/N). Rest well. Call for Armin or Eren if you need something and they'll be right there."
I rolled my eyes, getting up from my bed and following her. "I'm not completely crippled Hanji, I can do things myself."
Hanji gave a suppressed laugh as we both made our way to the main room. Mikasa waited near the front door, her hand loosely placed on the handle. Petra stood beside Erwin with their heads lowered as they discussed their plans for the outing.
At the back, a little farther from everyone, stood Levi with his arms crossed. His gaze turned to me as I walked in the room, greeting me with his usual stoic eyes. Levi gave me a light nod to which I returned.
"Awake already, (Y/N)?" Erwin turned his attention to me, a warm smile gracing his features. "I take it Hanji was too loud?"
"Oh please," Hanji pulled her mask down briefly to defend herself from Erwin's further scolding. "No one can put on all this without making a single noise."
I shrugged, silently agreeing with her.
"I did." Mikasa looked at Hanji with a small smug smirk, a proud and challenging glint in her grey eyes. Hanji huffed loudly, shoving Mikasa from doorway and opening it, stomping outside. "Whatever. Let's get this over with."
"Was it a good idea to let them go together?" Petra asked amusedly, throwing a glance back at Erwin, who just chuckled. "Probably not, but they wanted to go together so who's stopping them."
I watched as the pair stepped out into the snow and began walking away, leaving Levi behind to take a slightly different route than them.
"Wait, what time are you guys coming back again? I wasn't told."
"Probably around sunset. Erwin wants us to finish everything as quickly as possible."
I nodded. "Right.... Too bad I can't help..."
Yeah, I can't just suddenly be up and exploring the mountain with an injury that is supposedly still pretty fresh.
"Hm. That's why you'll be staying here and resting. If you need help renewing bandages or whatever just call Armin. He's just as good as Petra."
"I... will."
Levi gave a sharp nod, brushing past me to go through the door. However, Levi was hesitant to leave the front porch. He looked back at me for a moment and suddenly blurted out, "Don't forget to eat."
I held back my laughter, covering my mouth with my hand as I nodded. "I won't. Stay safe."
"....Hm." I watched as Levi walked away into the snowy planes through the window, eventually disappearing in the fog. I retreated from the window, wondering when everything will be over and imagining what would it be like when we returned.
I walked back to my room with my head still swimming deep in my thoughts, straightened my arms over my head and stretched my back, smiling as I heard a few satisfying cracks. I did a few more much needed stretches, cracking my stiff neck along the way before I decided to go get some breakfast.
My left arm hung limply by my side, a conscious act considering it should pretty much be immobilized. Though it did occur in my mind that I have been using my left arm as usual a few times lately, I could only hope no one really suspected anything.
I created a pathetic sandwich with anything I was able to find, not caring much if it resembled like dog food. I brought my plate to the table, sat down and ate my breakfast in silence. The clock pointed at 7:30, meaning it only has been 30 minutes since they left. I chewed the bland tasting meal as I wondered what to do to kill the time.
The sound of footsteps echoed in the other hall and I looked up to see a disheveled looking Eren stumbling out, one of his hands rubbing his eyes as he let out a monstrous yawn. I let out a low laugh, watching as he nearly crashed into a wall as he took a turn to the kitchen. "Good morning, Eren."
Eren grunted, shuffling around the cabinets as he began to check every single one. "Ughh.. where's my toothbrush??"
I raised a brow. "Probably in the bathroom."
"No it's not," Eren slurred angrily, using his hands to express himself. "It's not here!"
"Maybe that's because you're in the kitchen and not the bathroom, brother."
"Wha.." Eren looked at me with droopy eyes before fully opening them, realizing that he was indeed standing in the kitchen. Eren dragged himself to the bathroom, grumbling all the way there.
Honestly, it was a relieving sight to see some things are still the same, especially after everything that just recently happened. My life as a normal school girl is further than ever before. It's quite ironic, really. I decided to enter Wings Senior High with high hopes of finally being able to forget about my past, but instead, I've come crashing into it headfirst.
I continued to silently muse about my cruel fate as I began eating my meal again and about the same time, Eren came back looking less like he'd just woken up. I smiled at the sight of him, my low spirits rising back again. "Good morning, Eren," I greeted him for the second time in the morning.
"Hmm? Yeah yeah morning whatever." Eren plopped down on the seat in front of me and snatched the remains of my breakfast, stuffing the entire thing in his mouth in one go. I shook my head and crossed my arms in mock disappointment, but truthfully, I didn't mind at all. I wasn't that hungry anymore anyways.
I watched as Eren spent a good amount of time chewing, his eyes closed as he relished the questionably bland flavors of the sandwich, but I swear he made it look like he just had a bite of a sirloin steak or something.
Eren gulped, heaving a big sigh. "Ah, that's much better."
"You know you could've made your own sandwich, right?"
"Nah, I'm good. Trying to diet." Eren patted his relatively flat stomach. Wait what? Since when did Eren need to diet? Doesn't he have a six pack? Cause I remember days when he would work out intensely, and at the end of the week he'd come barging in my room yelling, 'Look (Y/N)! My pecks got more defined!! Right? Right?!'
"What- why are you looking at me like that?" Eren asked, referring to my unconvinced expression. I scoffed, pushing the dirty plate I used towards him. "I know for a fact you have a good body, so I don't see why you need to diet. Oh and, wash my plate."
"Uhh, I'm dieting because fucking Erwin banned me from 'over eating'. Like the guy doesn't do that himself. Also, why am I washing your plate again?" Eren pushed the plate back to me, which resulted in me immediately pushing it back to him.
"You eat like a vacuum cleaner, doofus. You literally just suck up all the food you can get your hands on. I'm surprised he didn't ban you earlier. And you're washing my plate because; one, you ate my food without permission; and two, I can't use one of my arms."
Eren reluctantly stood up, grabbing the plate with him and walking towards the kitchen to rinse it off. "If you think I'm bad, then you should see Sasha. She isn't just a normal vacuum cleaner, she's an aggressive premium vacuum cleaner."
"Aggresive... premium........ vacuum cleaner," I repeated slowly, emphasizing every word of Eren's unique choice of vocabulary.
"Yeah," he nodded, drying the clean plate and then putting it away. "So if I just suck up everything in my path, Sasha will go out of her way to just suck everything out of your - or anyone's path closest to her."
"Who's sucking what?" A sleepy voice asked from behind us. Armin stood with half lidded eyes as he stared at us with a confused expression. "Why does everyone talk about weird things whenever I join in?"
Eren sighed, filling up a warm glass of water and passing it to blonde boy. "No one's talking about weird things Armin, it's just you that interprets things weirdly."
Armin took the water gratefully and began sipping it gradually. "Well, maybe it's because you use weird words." Armin yawned and chugged down the rest of the water, setting the empty cup on the counter. "So... what're we going to do today?" He asked, the sleepiness fading away rapidly.
I shrugged. "I don't know. I don't usually stay back, remember?"
"Hmmm because you're always trying to find some time alone with Levi~" Eren teased, leaning forward as he gave my nose a boop.
I scowled, pushing his head back with my forefinger. "No, I do not, Mr. I Can't Help But Drool Everywhere Whenever I See Mikasa, Cause Damn, She Hawt."
"I do not drool in front of her," Eren protested, swatting away my hand. Armin peeked his head from over my shoulder, a playful smile tugging his lips. "Yeah, you just stare at her until she gets visibly uncomfortable."
"Aren't you supposed to be on my side Armin?" Eren growled, staring daggers at Armin as he put on his innocent face. "I didn't know there were sides."
Eren frowned, raising a hand and pointing it between Armin's eyes. "You like Annie!"
"No I don't!" Armin squeaked, his face reddening in less than a second.
"You think she's cute!!" Eren added, a satisfied smile on his face as we watched Armin turn into a living tomato.
"La la la, I can't hear you, I'm walking away now~" Armin plugged his fingers in his ears, turned on his heels and skipped away to the main room.
"Armin and Annie sittin' in a tree!" Eren began singing obnoxiously, rushing to catch up to Armin side, who just began la-la-la-ing louder than before.
I winced as Eren shouted at the top of his lungs," K-I-S-S-I-N-G!! Mooch moooch mwahhh~!" The brunette squeezed his cheeks together, his lips forming into one similar to a goldfish as he made kissy faces in front of a very red Armin.
"EREN!" Armin shoved Eren back, who pushed him back as well, and within a few seconds they began tussling and wrestling in the middle of the room. I leaned in the doorway, watching with a smile as Eren landed playful punches at Armin's face, and Armin sending back his own sets of playful -yet pitiful- attacks.
All of a sudden, a very warm memory came back to me of the old days when we were still living in the orphanage.
"Boys, boys!" I tutted dramatically, stepping forward and waving my arm around. "That's enough trying to kill each other this morning. We'll continue this tonight before dinner, okay? Now let's go eat breakfast!"
Eren paused mid-punch to stare at me with his mouth open and a familiar glint in his eyes. "Wow. You sound just like Ms. Falida."
"You messed up the words (Y/N). It's 'we'll continue this tonight at 8 before dinner'," Armin corrected sharply, snapping his fingers. "Get it right."
"Well whatever, it was close. Now get up already, you're completely messing up the rug."
"Now you sound like Levi," Eren joked, nudging Armin who snickered in agreement. My mouth drew back into a straight line, my eyes narrowing. "Ha ha hah, much funny, so wow, amused is me. Fix the rug."
The two boys chuckled lightly as they got back on their feet and started smoothing out the horribly ruffled rug from their mock wrestling match. I touched my neck and cleared my throat, noticing how dry it had gotten. Rinsing Armin's glass, I refilled it with warm water and quickly downed it one go.
I returned to the main room, happy to find that Eren and Armin had tidied their previous mess. We all sat down together at the table and began a small discussion on what to do for next few hours.
"Continue the report?" Armin suggested, to which Eren instantly said, "No way! I wanna do something fun."
"Like sleep?" I asked, lazily leaning my head on my palm. The lack of decent sleep last night made it so I was finally feeling drowsy in the morning.
"But we just woke up," Armin argued back, before being cut of by Eren.
"Oh I know! How about a board game? Monopoly?"
"We don't have it," Armin sighed, looking at Eren in slight annoyance.
"Well, we can make it then!"
I scoffed. "Hell no. I only remember one card from Monopoly and that's the 'Get out of Jail' one. There's no way we can DIY it."
"Well, how about a simpler game like uh..... UNO?"
"UNO? You want to create a makeshift UNO deck?" Armin asked skeptically.
"Yeah!" Eren nodded, getting excited over his brilliant idea. "There's just colors, numbers, and a few other cards right? C'mon we can do this! I have plenty of leftover paper."
"Which is for the report," I reminded him, but Eren brushed me off. "It's scrap paper (Y/N), it'll be fine! Let me go get it real quick."
Armin and I shared a silent look of, 'Oh shit, here we go again' as we waited for Eren to return with an unexpected amount of scrap paper cradled in his arms. We spent the next hour or so just cutting up the paper into small wonky rectangles and writing the color and the number on it afterwards. I looked at the mess that we created, and I can say for sure Levi will have a wacking good time making us clean up everything until it we could see our own reflection on it.
I let out a sigh and cleared my throat, realizing it was dry again. I stood up from my seat and headed to the kitchen to get another cup of warm water to moisture my dry, crackly throat. I filled the glass nearly till the rim and raised it to my lips to drink it-
DIE!!
I flinched violently, the glass slipping from my hand and fell to the ground, breaking into hundreds of glistening shards at my feet. I stumbled back in fear, eyes wide and knees trembling as my breathing became short and staggered.
Eren and Armin came rushing to me, abruptly halting when they saw the shiny glints of broken glass surrounding me. I leaned on the counter for support, my legs unable to fully support my body anymore. Waves of absolute fear travelled down my spine, making me shudder uncontrollably as my stomach felt like it began eating itself.
I'm scared. I'm so scared. What's happening?
I shut my eyes tightly, desperately trying to control my breathing. Eren wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I opened my eyes as he carefully guided me away from the deadly shards. "(Y/N)? Are you okay?"
Sweat began dribbling down my forehead as I brought my fear-driven eyes to meet Eren's worried emerald ones. "The- di-.. did you hear that?"
"Hear.. what?" Eren asked tentatively, the concern in his voice growing stronger.
"Th- that voice. A voice- it shouted hard, really hard-"
"(Y/N)." Armin placed his hands on my shoulders. "There was no one talking when you went here. The only noise we heard was the one of your glass breaking."
"B-but, it was loud. How cou-.. how could you have not heard it?"
"(Y/N)," Eren said sternly. "There were no noises. At all."
I let out heavy gasps of air as I glanced back and forth from Eren to Armin, who stared at me intensely. I lowered my gaze, rubbing my shivering arm. "Nevermind. It's nothing. I was just startled, that's all."
Eren kept me firmly in place against my will, his voice serious and void of any lightness. "(Y/N). Explain."
By now, panic was beginning to settle in along with the tornado of emotions whirling through me. "Look, it's nothing okay?! It's must've just been the dumb voice I hear from time to tim-"
I stopped myself before ending properly, a hand darting to mouth in a flash as I realized what I had just done. Eren drew back slightly and Armin took a step away from me, both trying to process the words that had left my mouth a few seconds ago.
"Wh- what did you say?" Eren asked, the tone of his voice changing completely.
"Nothing," I growled, trying to find a way to get away from him.
"You said... that you hear a voice from time to time."
"No I didn't," I snarled, as I began thrashing within Eren's arms.
Eren struggled to keep my squirming body still by using more strength to keep me in place, but I managed wiggle out halfway. "(Y/N), wait! I need to tell you something."
I pushed away from Eren even further. "I don't want to hear it."
But this time, Eren used all of his strength to pull me back and keep me deathly still. "Do you remember," he began, gripping down on my shoulders," sometime before the expedition, when Erwin went in the hospital, I said I wanted to talk with you? This is the same thing I want to say!"
I clenched my jaw, using both my arms to push Eren away, disregarding the promise I made not to use my mysteriously healed arm. Armin noticed almost within an instant, judging from the small gasp that came from him, but Eren didn't seem to care about it at all.
I stepped away from the brunette, making sure there was enough space between us so that he wouldn't try and drag me back again. Eren's eyes were wide and serious, but troubled at the same time.
"(Y/N). In my father's notes, he mentioned two names. One being Ackerman, and the other bein-"
A faint, sharp, piercing bloodcurdling scream cut him off mid-sentence as we all gazed upwards, startled by the sudden noise.
"What was that?" I quickly asked, rushing to the front door and opening it, stepping outside as the scream was cut short. My heart raced violently, the sound of its thumps deafening my own ears as a new feeling of dread dropped in my gut.
Something's happened.
I could feel the extremely alert presence of Voice in my mind, it's worrisome thoughts blending with mine.
"I-it sounds like it came from the west side," Armin stammered, standing beside me as he stared into the direction of the sound.
"West?" Eren furrowed his eyebrows. "Isn't that where Erwin's group went?"
My eyes immediately widened in horror as Eren said those words. No... no, no! This can't be happening!
"PETRA!!" I shrieked, not giving a second thought as I sprinted away. From behind me, I could hear Eren and Armin's panicked voices, but I didn't care.
Something has happened. What else could explain the all the uncalled anxiety and fear overwhelming me since last night? I should've never let Petra go. Never. I will never forgive myself if something happened to her.
I kept my gaze straight and focused on where I was headed to, running with all the energy I had. The fibres of my muscles were beginning to ache from the sudden extreme physical action and the edges of my fingers were quickly numbing from being exposed to the harsh cold.
Loud thumps of something approaching behind me replaced the sound of the rushing wind, followed by a single sharp bark and a familiar voice calling out my name. I skidded to a stop, turning around to see a massive wolf nearly crash-stopping beside me. Sitting on it's back was Hanji, who quickly offered me a hand up. "C'mon. We'll be faster."
The wolf- who now I recognized as Mikasa, crouched down so I can scramble up on her back, positioning myself beside Hanji as Mikasa picked up the pace once more.
"Did you hear that scream too??" I asked, nearly having to shout to make myself audible over the wind.
"No!" Hanji shouted back. "But Mikasa did!"
Mikasa ran faster, ears completely flattened to her head as the fur on her neck began to bristle. Her heavy steps left significant marks on the thick layers snow, kicking up a gust of the crystals behind her with every step.
I looked down, noticing that there was a trail of footsteps slowly becoming visible. We're nearly there, these footsteps are definitely recent ones. Mikasa's ears pricked up and she started sniffing the air. I raised my head to take a whiff as well, but suddenly, Mikasa lurched forward.
She lost her footing and stumbled to the ground, her body tumbling harshly into the ground. And because of the laws of physics, it meant that both me and Hanji were flung forward at the same speed Mikasa was previously running. We crashed harshly into the snow, me landing farther than Hanji did.
My body was stinging with both fire and cold. The impact of the fall chafing my skin and the cold of the snow making it burn harder than it should've. I winced, accidentally gripping on more snow as I tried to get up. The cold white substance burned my frostbitten fingers and I jerked back, only to fall back into more shock as I stared at the snow on my hand.
Crimson snow. Scarlet stained crystals stenching of blood. I forced myself to run forward, a sob choking me at the back of my throat as I gazed at the sight I never ever wanted to see.
Surrounded in the pool of her own blood laid Petra, clothes torn and bedraggled and lying deathly still.
"Petra!!" I cried out, rushing to her side. There were multiple wounds on her, but the worst one was the one that stretched from the side of her neck to all the way to her chest. I took off my jacket and pressed down on the wound with hopes the blood would stop gushing out. Hanji immediately came to my side and began applying as much pressure to the wounds as she can, sending a devastated glance to Mikasa, who stood by the sidelines with a ghostly look on her face.
I heard the footsteps of people approaching and heard the voices of Eren and Armin, but that doesn't matter. My jacket was quickly turning red as blood slowly started to stain my fingers. "Shoo-... shoot the flare!" I ordered, my voice hoarse and scratchy.
Everyone looked down on their belts in a panicked frenzy. "We didn't bring it!"
"Then GO GET IT!" I screamed, nearly losing my voice in the process. Mikasa got ready to run back but was stopped by Armin. "She won't make it, she's losing too much blood too quickly!"
"Then do something!" I cried, my whole body shaking, tears running freely down my cheeks. Everyone stood there, completely freaked out and panicked out of their minds, but Eren was the only one to speak.
"You're the only one who can do something!" He blurted out.
"What??"
"The other name my father mentioned in his notes were the-.. the.. Zia-.. Ziar..?"
"...Ziahara?" Mikasa finished for Eren, her eyes wide.
"Yes! Ziahara! I remember your mother's last name was Ziahara, and you were her only child. That means you're the successor of the Ziahara bloodline! The other Alpha Lord of werewolves!!"
Mikasa let out the loudest gasp, her hands covering her mouth as she stared at me in complete shock, but I didn't feel anything but my anger rising to my limits.
"So what does it matter?!" I snarled viciously. "That doesn't help Petra right now!!"
"Yes it does!" Eren pushed forward, grasping my shoulders. "(Y/N), listen to me. The Lord of the Ziahara bloodline were gifted with the ability to heal others! You can heal her!"
"I can't!" I snapped back, flinching as I felt more blood flow through my fingers.
Eren seemed furious with my answer, harshly yelling in my face. "Look I know you hate werewolves or whatever, but you have to stop being so selfish and-"
"It's not that you fucking idiot, I DON'T KNOW HOW!!"
Hanji and Armin carefully offered to take over my place as I got things figured out with Eren, and I watched with a broken heart as Petra's lungs heaved for air.
"I-.. I know.." I choked out, turning to Eren. "I know about my bloodline... and who my mom was, and I know who I am as well. I stole... one of the pages from you long ago, but I didn't want to believe it. Even so, I don't know...how to heal others."
"But you healed your arm," Mikasa pointed out, but I shook my head. "I didn't know how...."
Eren let go of me, a sad look in his eyes as he gazed at the growing puddle of blood.
Mikasa furrowed her eyebrows before suggesting, "Why don't you ask your wolf?"
I looked at her with blurry and confused eyes. "I don't have one..?"
"If you're a werewolf, then you must have a wolf. Do you not see it whenever you close your eyes?"
I shook my head despairingly. There was only darkness and me.
Mikasa placed a hand on my shoulder. "Then a voice! Do you ever hear a voice in your head? A voice that speaks back to you??"
My eyes widened. "A voice...?"
"Yes!" Mikasa encouraged me. "That's your wolf! Call for it!"
My body started shaking again as I inlahed a shaky breath, trying to focus my thoughts. "Voice..? Please come.... come to me, please..."
"You... don't call it by it's name?" Mikasa asked softly.
"I don't know it's name," I held back a sob.
Voice... Voice please.... come......
...
Voice, please! I'm begging you, please...
...I'm here.
Help me please! You have to help me heal Petra!
No.
"WHY?!" I screamed in my head and also physically, earning several worried glances.
Healing isn't something so simple and easy! You use up your own life energy and soul to heal someone else! You will die!
It doesn't matter! I have to help her, please!
I'm not letting my only vessel die!
I won't!! You know! You know I'd be as good as dead if I lived knowing that I had the power to save my best friend, and yet I didn't!
....
So help me, please Voice! Please...
Petra convulsed once, her body then becoming completely limp as her chest rose less and less each time... until it stopped. Her mouth was left open as she failed to take in oxygen and her heart was beating at a dangerous pace to make up for the mass loss of blood, making her extremely prone to cardiac arrest. Hanji was preparing to perform CPR and try to revive her breathing while Armin placed his fingers on to check her weakening pulse. "Whatever you guys are planning, do it now! We're losing her!"
"(Y/N)!" Mikasa cried out to me, staring straight into my eyes.
Voice! Please! Please oh please!!
Hanji slightly moved Petra to a firmer ground and readied herself next to her neck and shoulders, then getting into a kneeling position and placing her interlaced hands on the middle of her chest.
Voice!
....place your hands directly on the worst wound and whatever happens, do not faint.
Thank you!
"Hanji, move!" I pleaded, launching myself forward, discarding the blood drenched jacket away from Petra's injury and putting my bare hands on them.
Oh, don't thank me yet.
As soon as my hand made contact, my whole body was lit aflame. The sudden pain forced to scream into the air and the need to get away has never been so strong. I let out another scream, the pain quickly becoming far too unbearable for me to endure. Within a minute I could feel my consciousness slipping away from my grasp, the pain becoming too much to handle.
Faint, and both of you will die.
Voice's words rang in my ears, and I shifted my focused on staying awake, fighting back my desires and gritting my teeth as I felt the fire from my whole body travel to only my hands, scorching them at a thousand degrees.
"It hurts..!" I whimpered, tears flowing free and sweat dripping down my whole body.
Hold on a little longer.
Through the slits of my barely opened eyes, I watched as the palms of my hands emitted a faint golden glow and the worst of Petra's wounds stopped bleeding and slowly began to close itself.
My head hung low as I felt my own body's energy quickly depleting. I could feel my heartbeat slowing down and soon enough I struggled to even breath. My mind became hazy and it became harder to keep my eyes opened. I let out a violent cough, blood splattering out onto my clothes and the snow.
"(Y/N)!" Armin exclaimed with a horrified expression. "Mikasa! She's coughing blood."
Mikasa sat by my side, supporting my weight as she muttered words under her breath. ".....-end me your strength."
I gasped for air, the lack of oxygen making me extremely dizzy. I could taste the metallic tang of blood in my mouth, feeling it dribble down my chin. The scarlet liquid dripped from my nose, forcing me to only breath through my blood tasting mouth.
Don't die on me. Just a little bit more.
I truly believe I was about to die right there, if it weren't for a warm feeling that suddenly erupted from my back when Mikasa gently pressed her hand on it. I was able to quickly snatch enough air into my lungs and the overwhelming sleepiness slightly lessened, the weight on my eyelids slowly disappearing.
The pain was still excruciating and I could no longer feel my fingers anymore, but somehow, a part of my lost energy was restored.
"Keep going," Mikasa rasped out, clearly taken aback from the amount of power she was losing herself. "I'll help you."
I gave a weak nod in response, focusing everything I had to my endurance, forcing myself try my best to block out the fiery pain.
How much... longer...?
Wait.
I stared through the black splotches covering my gaze as the last bit of the seriously torn flesh partially heal itself, closing the open wound with a thin layer of tissue.
Enough! Pull back!
I jerked away, immediately collapsing onto Hanji who was crouching behind me in case I fell back. I lay on her lap, vigorously breathing in as much air as I can manage as fast as I can. The flaming pain subsided as soon as I pulled away and I could feel my whole body calm down, a sense of coolness rushing over me.
Beside me, Mikasa panted heavily as she clutched her chest, her other hand keeping her in her sitting position, preventing her from faceplanting into the snow. She was in definite pain, but managed to regain some composure after a minute or two.
"You... you have my.... utmost respect, (Y/N)," Mikasa panted out, placing her hand over my limp and numb one. I glanced at her weakly, still trying to catch my breath. "I only helped you for a little bit... and I already feel this weak."
I mouthed my thanks, still quite unable to speak. The memory of the pain still lingered in my whole body, especially within my hands. I've never felt so much in pain. Like my whole body was stuck and I was being lit on fire alive, a person sucking away all my energy at the same time, someone else stabbing my insides and completely tearing it apart in the most agonizing way.
Armin and Eren checked on Petra, giving a sigh of relief. "She's okay, but still needs intensive care."
Eren wrapped his jacket and scarf over Petra, noticing how exposed her skin was to the extreme weather. "It looks like (Y/N) and Mikasa managed to stop the bleeding," Armin murmured after checking her injuries.
Mikasa shook her head. "Not me. Just (Y/N)."
I finally regained enough strength to sit up, the numbness I felt going away at a steady pace as some of my strength slowly returned to me. "No. Thank you, Mikasa." I bowed my head to her. "If it weren't for you, I would've surely died."
Mikasa gave me a small nod, returning her gaze to Petra as she examined some claw marks on Petra's arm, her face contorting into a confused expression. We all watched as Mikasa slightly reopened some of the clothing Eren had put on Petra, her eyes tracing the staggering lines. She leaned down towards Petra's shoulder, where one of the main wounds were, and breathed in gently.
"Erwin...."
"What?" Hanji furrowed her eyebrows.
"It's faint, but her clothes have Erwin's scent. Also..."
"Also what?" Eren questioned, looking up to meet Mikasa's troubles eyes.
"These claw marks belong to Erwin."
Armin looked down to the light wounds striking through Petra's pale skin. "How can you be so sure?"
"I know it when I see it."
"So you're saying... it was Erwin who attacked Petra?" I asked, my heart sinking.
Mikasa didn't answer me and instead looked around at her surroundings, an even more troubled gaze taking over her features. The raven haired girl stood up, still constantly looking around her, eyes wide in distress. Her wolf ears perked and alert, her tail bristling behind her as she began walking aimlessly, her head held high in the air.
"Mikasa?" I forced myself to get up, slightly stumbling back which made Hanji steady my balance by my shoulders.
"Eren, Armin. Get ready to bring back Petra to the cabin. We'll shoot the flare afterwards," Hanji ordered, giving me pat on my shoulder before she followed Mikasa, who still continued to walk in a random direction. "Mikasa! Come on, we're heading back!"
"Wait!" Mikasa pleaded, desperation and panic audible in her voice. "Just.. wait."
We all watched as Mikasa took one more sniff in the air, before running towards a rocky dip a few meters away. Hanji ran after her when her head disappeared out of sight. I did my best to quickly catch up with them, about a quarter way's left when I heard Mikasa yell out quickly, "Hanji no!"
What happened?
I rushed forward, skidding down the rocks in time to see Hanji collapse onto her knees, a low anguished wail erupting from her, the painful howl quickly turning into a heart-quenching scream of grief that echoed endlessly through the air. Hanji cried and shrieked violently, leaning down to cradle a figure on the ground. Mikasa sat down -nearly falling harshly- with a sob, burying her face into the limp figure Hanji held close to her chest. It was when I took a few steps closer towards them did I realize who the person was.
Tightly wrapped in the arms of a grief stricken Hanji was the lifeless body of a close friend,
a lover,
a leader,
a compassionate and caring man,
Class Captain and Alpha of Wings Senior High,
Erwin Smith.
--------------
Random reader: >:(
Rhina: What?
RR: It's Tuesday! You said you'd go back to regular updates! This should've been published yesterday.
Rhina: Wth u talkin abt hah? It still says Monday on my phone.
RR: U lying
Rhina: no. maybe :v
RR: well if ur telling the truth, then you have the worst, dumbest, broken phone that ever existed!
Rhina: Whatchu say? Whatchu just say?? Ooo mama samsang ain't gonna be happy when she hears bout this!
In all seriousness, I'm terribly sorry for the late update. I had planned to finish it on Monday, but I didn't manage to finish it in time with the amount of ridiculous work teachers are handing out. This chapter beat my longest record, a whopping 6685 words. Damn.