And I keep to myself
Fuck with no one else
And I know it's my fault but I don't care
✂︎------------------------
STUMBLING, I forced myself up. All I could think about was how it was too soon, and how I was far from ready. Confrontation wasn't something I enjoyed, which is another reason everything I've ever done at this school so far was deeply planned out to avoid that. I liked to make sure if anything went wrong it wouldn't be traced back to me. So now, after I'd ignored all of his calls, all of his texts, and blocked him, I sure as hell didn't want to be in this position.
I'm sure everyone was confused, but I tried to keep a straight face as I left. Once in the hallway, I heard the footsteps from behind me. Keep walking, keep walking, I told myself.
"Laurene!" And there it was. That voice.
"Her names Laurene?" I heard a feminine voice follow up.
"Not now, Savien."
I sped up my walk to a run, not looking back as I pushed into the girls bathroom. My heart was racing, even faster than before. Maybe I was wrong, maybe I was stressed at all before just preparing for this moment because maybe somehow my mind knew Reece was here and didn't think to warn me. Locking myself in the stall, I forced deep breathes in and out. But my chest felt like it was closing up and I just couldn't control myself. Why didn't anyone tell me? Why didn't he tell me?
Because you blocked him, dumbass.
The bathroom opened, and I closed my hand over my mouth trying to make the sounds of me half dying while crying less obvious. I pulled my legs up so no one would see my feet from under the stall, but it didn't matter. The knock on the stall, my stall, was more like a light tap.
"Laurene, I-I tried to tell you but you-," His voice cracked and I let out another muffled cry.
Breathe you stupid bitch, how insecure and emotionally unstable are you?
He already knew I was in here, and it's not like I could keep ignoring him. "Can we just talk? Please," He asked, stepping back.
I took a deep breath, taking out my phone and using the toilet paper to fix my makeup to the best of my ability before unlocking the door and stepping outside of the stall.
And there he was. Looking almost the same from when I left. Floppy brown hair parted in the middle, dark brown eyes, tanned skin with pink on his cheeks that never fade. All in all, he was...perfect? I need to stop using that word. He was beautiful. And that made me mad because it's always harder to say no to a cute face. He's a literal puppy.
"Talk," I pushed, crossing my arms.
Reece looked me over, and maybe he saw something he hated because I swear his eyes grew darker. "You look... different."
Preppy was the word he was probably thinking of. "That's all you have to say?"
"No! I- why'd you dye your hair?" It was a light brown before.
I dyed it because I couldn't stand to look in the mirror and see even a little bit of something he liked in me. I didn't use to wear much makeup either, It took to long to put it on. But when we broke up I tried to change everything about me. Hair, makeup, clothes, even attitude. Believe it or not, I never used to be THAT MUCH of an uptight backstabbing bitch.
"I don't like brown hair," I lied, and I could see him look offended, only for a second before he straightened his posture.
"You're still a bad liar," He replied, turning his head. He was right, I couldn't lie near him. He could see right through everything I said. Everything.
"What do you want, Reece? You wanted to talk and all you've done so far was ask me irrelevant questions."
"Why didn't you answer my calls?"
"You broke up with me, I didn't think it was necessary to still be talking to you when you clearly wanted to be apart."
"I broke up with you because you wanted to be in every guys pants except mine," He shot back.
I laughed dully. "Really? That's your excuse. You ended everything because I didn't want to have sex with you anymore? Ironic."
"That's," He sighed, kicking the ground. "That's not what I meant. I mean you didn't care about our relationship so what was the point? You were wasting my time."
"I didn't care? I didn't care?!"
"Yes-."
"You're unbelievable, Reece. If anything, you're wasting my time," I spat. Turning to leave. "And get the fuck out of the girls' bathroom!"
I couldn't even begin to understand how Reece got in his thick skull that I was the one who didn't care. Wasn't he the one who broke up with me? Yes, he was. Savien was waiting outside the second I barged into the hallway. Stomping my way to my next class because lunch was practically over, she followed quietly. She didn't say anything until I was practically outside of my class which was next to the library. Waiting outside furiously scrolling through Instagram, she waved her hand in front of my face.
"I don't know what happened between you two but... if you need anyone to talk to I'd like to assume we're friends," She said, almost a whisper. It was clear she wasn't good at these types of things.
"I'll be fine, thanks," I replied, looking up for a second. She had a frown on her face, eyebrows furrowed. She nodded her head, not saying anything.
"Well, my next class is like...on the other side of the school so," She turned, beginning to walk away. "I'll see you in last period? We're in the same class anyway."
But I didn't make it even halfway through the 5th period. It just kept getting harder and harder to pay attention, and I felt like I was putting all my focus in trying to breathe because that was getting harder to. I left school through one of the side doors so I didn't have to pass the main office. I called for an uber instead of my regular driver, not wanting me leaving school early to be known by my parents. In the ride home, I realized two drastic things.
I didn't get anything I wanted to get done today, in terms of the process of tearing down the A-listers. And having Savien and Reece around would make it a lot harder to complete these things in secret. Partly because I wanted Savien around but I knew I couldn't tell her about my plan, and also because deep down, I didn't want Reece to look at me as any more of a bitch than I have to be to ruin Tao and her little clique.
The real problem is now I have to take over the fucking school, while having people I care about in the way.
Fuck me.
Song Of The Chapter:
I have nothing to say about this chapter except that I hope you liked it ehehe.
Ok I'm done.
Mega heart eyes for anyone reading this.
Ok now I'm actually done bye.
Love you.
;*